Photographs of Freedom
by fowl68
Summary: Oppression and famine have plauged the land for years. Rebels come out of hiding and secret coups are spoken of only behind closed doors. And then there are the things that the public has no idea about. Eventual Kranna.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note:** Got in the sudden mood to write Kratos again, so here is the beginning of something that might take me quite a while. And since everyone else seems to have a story on how Kratos and Anna met and got together, I figured I should try my hand at it.

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/

_My manner of thinking, so you say, cannot be approved. Do you suppose I care? A poor fool indeed is he who adopts a manner of thinking for others! My manner of thinking stems straight from my considered reflections; it holds with my existence, with the way I am made. It is not in my power to alter it; and were it, I'd not do so. ~Donatien Alphonse Francois de Sade_

-/-/

"I'm surprised that a man of your standing would come for a routine inspection." Kvar remarked, hands behind his back.

Kratos glanced at the half-elf. There were many in Cruxis who he disliked, but Kvar was towards the top of that list. Much like many of the others that were basically brainwashed by Yggdrasill, there was some kind of…wrongness…that hung around them, but in Kvar, it was much more obvious.

"Lord Yggdrasill was under the impression that there were certain practices happening in this ranch that weren't to his liking." And that was saying something for the Mithos Yggdrasill that had been ruling Cruxis for the past four thousand years was not a man to care very much about such nit-picky details.

"Well, the test subjects do need to be controlled, after all. Can't have them getting thoughts about rebellion, now can we?"

"No, of course not." Kratos murmured, glancing around the cold corridors and heard shouting. "I take it that those sounds aren't that of rebellion?"

"O-Of course not. I'll show you that that matter will be resolved very soon." Kvar strode out a side door into a yard. "What is going on here?" He shouted.

One of the guards looked up. "Sir! It's nothing. Subject A012 is just being uncooperative, as usual."

The test subject snorted. "Right, because there would be so many people willing to cooperate with you guys."

One of the guards holding her arms cracked the back of his fist across her already bruised face. "Shut yer trap!"

"Careful, boys." Kvar chides them, sliding closer to them to look down at the subject. "You don't want to break such an…interesting…test subject, now would you?"

"No sir." They chorus, but the look on their faces speaks differently.

"Get her back to her cell before she decides to make more of a racket."

"Yessir."

As Kratos and Kvar watched them take her away—Kratos would have described it as dragging, but the subject was so thin that it probably wouldn't take very much to lift her—Kratos asks, "Does it usually rebel like this?'

"Sometimes. It's usually too weak to do much else, but the latest experimentations with the Angelus Project seem to have given it some strength."

"I see. So the research is going well?"

"Quite well, sir. There have been a few…hiccups…but because this ranch is near such popular areas such as Luin and Asgard, there is never a shortage of potential subjects."

"Lord Yggdrasill will be pleased to hear that." Kratos knew that Yuan would hate the way that Kvar was speaking about his prisoners, like they were little less than objects, but that was why Yuan hadn't been the one chosen to inspect the ranches. And if Kratos was honest with himself, he didn't much like it either, but there was little he could do about it.

-/-/

"This is getting outrageous!"

"What is?" Kratos asked, entering Yuan's room without knocking. But then again, when had they ever really needed to?

Yuan gestured at the screen in front of him and Kratos braced a hand on the back of his chair as he leaned in to see. "Those are the files on the experiments."

"Keep reading." Yuan's voice was tight with anger.

Kratos glanced at his friend before looking back at the screen. His eyes widened a slight fraction at what he was reading and he had to swallow down the bile that rose in his throat. He'd seen terrible things in the war, but this… "He's crossed a line."

"Exactly my point!" Yuan pushed away from the desk, beginning to pace angrily. "I could understand his reasoning up to a point, but this is…"

"I'm fairly certain that we can both agree that Mithos fell into madness a long time ago." Kratos pointed out, leaning on the desk, back to the computer. He didn't want to see the screen, didn't want to see the results of those experiments.

"This is _beyond_ madness, Kratos!"

"And what is it that you intend to do about it? Overthrow Mithos?" They both know that they can't beat the manchild of an angel, know that even if they could that they might hesitate because Mithos had been their friend for years, was still their friend during his rare periods of lucidity.

Yuan looked over at him and Kratos didn't like the look in the blue eyes. It usually meant that the half-elf was about to do something stupid. "That's it!"

Kratos blinked. "Pardon?"

"We could overthrow Yggdrasill." Not Mithos because Mithos and Yggdrasill are two people with similar faces. "Overthrow Cruxis!"

"I'm beginning to wonder if you haven't gone over the deep end as well. Do you even know what you're saying right now?"

"Of course I do! Think about it, Kratos. We could stop more things like that from happening." Yuan didn't need to point at the screen.

"We could." Kratos agrees cautiously. "But you're forgetting a rather vital detail, Yuan."

"And what is that?"

"We don't have the resources necessary to take on an organization as large as Cruxis."

"So you're in?"

"No, I'm not, Yuan. I won't help you do this."

"So are you agreeing with what Yggdrasill is doing? With _that_?"

"You know I don't. But…if you're going to do this, you need someone on the inside."

"Um…I kind of am on the inside, Kratos. We both are. I wasn't planning on leaving Cruxis. That'd be a little obvious, don'tcha think?"

"You have a lot to do if you're really going to go through with this. You need people behind you, a base of operations. You can't do all that and keep up with Yggdrasill's schemes. I'll do my work and yours while you get this settled."

Yuan blinked at him. They had been friends, the best of friends, for millennia, but he knew how much Kratos worked just for his portion. Overseeing the ranches, dealing with the scientists of the worlds to make sure that their developments didn't go too far as well as helping Yggdrasill find the right combination of mana in a body that would match properly with Martel's mana signature. Even for an angel, it was a great deal of work.

And now Kratos was offering to add Yuan's share onto that workload? When Yuan had to deal with the technology and most of the magic involved in any procedures that Yggdrasill needed?

"Are you sure?" Yuan asks. _Do you want to help me go through with this? Do you want to risk your life for this?_

But it had been many centuries since they had been afraid of death.

Kratos nods. This isn't their first time suggesting that they overthrow Yggdrasill_ (They always spoke of such things in private) _but this was the first time that they were actually going through with it.

-/-/

Sometimes, Kratos wonders where everything goes. The town that Yuan had been born in and lived in until he was about nine—Kratos hadn't seen the way it looked back then, only heard it described. By the time they returned, decades after the war had ended, Yuan had been hard-pressed to recognize anyone or anything in that small town—was called Asgard now.

He and Yuan had visited it a few centuries back for a routine check of the town. Kratos had caught Yuan standing atop of what had once been an aqueduct, but was not broken and crumbling, and staring into the canyon.

"This wasn't here before." Yuan tells his friend when he comes to stand beside him. "There used to be homes here. It was where we would have our snow wars during Celsius Day."

It wasn't the only canyon, the only valley that was new. The magitechnology weapons of the war had had a devastating effect on the landscape. Kratos is fairly certain that the remains of his own home are beneath the ocean now.

It's only later—a decade and a half later, when a young half-elf is dipping his hand into the water outside of a washtub and he comments how the water feels gritty and it doesn't look quite the same blue as the other oceans they'd crossed—that Kratos realizes just where his old homeland had ended up. The rich farmland was now far beneath the waves and the constant churning of the waves must not let the soil settle very well.

But Kratos prefers the small towns and villages of Sylvarant to Tethe'alla's rich communities. The air smells a little cleaner there _(closer to how it had smelled long before Yggdrasill's taint, before he had ever met the siblings with strong dreams and pretty faces)_ and the villagers are friendly.

"Are you lost, mister?"

Kratos looks down at the speaker. It's a little girl, with bright brown eyes and dirty blonde hair. "No."

"So then why're you just sittin' round?"

"I like to watch."

The girl followed his eyes around the fountain area. "Whatcha watchin'?"

"People. Things."

"Huh."

"…I heard that it could get dangerous around here." He asks cautiously. In a normal circumstance, he wouldn't have been asking a—how old was she five? Six?—year old that, but war and suffering made children grow up much too quick.

His assumption had been right. Her wide eyes sadden and she hugs the little doll in her arms closer to her. "Sometimes, yeah. Mama told me that my sister got taken to the ranch. I can't remember having a sister."

"I see…who's your mother?"

Her eyes instantly became guarded. "'M not supposed to tell."

"Of course not. You're a very smart girl." Kratos shifts a little uncomfortably on his seat of on the bench. He'd never been as good with children as Yuan.

"Cheryl, stop bothering the nice man. Go play." The woman has the child's blonde hair, but her eyes are green. "I'm so sorry if she bothered you."

"No bother at all." He tells the woman. "I take it you're her mother?"

"Yes indeed." She took a seat by him.

"She mentioned something about a sister being taken to the ranch?" Kratos begins carefully. He doesn't want to push this woman too far. "Can you tell me more about this ranch?"

The woman chuckled a little and it was a bleak sound, bitter and humorless. "You been livin' under a rock for your whole life, traveler?"

Kratos offered a slight smile. "I've been out of the world for a spell, yes. Things were bad back then, but I can't remember them being this bad."

"Back then?" She looked him over. The glance was approving, but not filled with active interest. "You aren't nearly old enough to be talking like that."

"I'm older than I look, madam. Believe that if nothing else."

The woman clasps her hands in front of her. "…Eight years ago, the Desians came here, taking blood samples. They told us that they had heard of some kind of disease that could have spread. We didn't believe them, of course, but what could we do? If we had resisted, they would have killed us. It wasn't more than a day or two later that they came back and they took my daughter and a cleric of the church. We haven't seen or heard from either of them again."

Kratos watched the little girl who was playing with a young boy that couldn't be much older than her. "She's never met her sister, has she?"

"No. I found out that I was pregnant with her six months after they took away my Anna."

"I see…I'm sorry. It was intrusive of me." Kratos stood. "I'm afraid I must be going. Thank you for your time."

-/-/-/

"You look like hell warmed over."

Kratos looked over at Yuan. "Such a kind friend you are."

"I am." Yuan poured himself a mug of spiced tea from the kettle sitting on the counter by Kratos' hip. "If I weren't so kind, I would've told you that you looked gorgeous. You wanna tell me why you felt the sudden urge to come all the way out here?"

They both had small homes on the worlds that they shared when they couldn't take being on Derris-Kharlan anymore. When it got too still and they needed the bustling lives of people, real people, not angels. They had one in Sybak in Meltokio and one in Palmacosta.

"You weren't wrong." Kratos tells him, taking a sip as he looks out the window at the gentle waves and the busy port. "About overthrowing Yggdrasill."

"What happened?"

"I was seeing if any of the townspeople had any information on what was going on to their relatives."

"No idea, right?"

Kratos shook his head. "None."

Yuan stared into the spiced tea. It was their favorite, an odd blend of herbs that Martel had mixed by accident. Martel had gotten them into the habit of growing a small herb garden and his eyes strayed to the small flower box hanging just outside of the window.

"You can't join me." Yuan won't let him because he's not sure he can let Kratos die for him.

"No, obviously not. You'd be under suspicion then."

Yuan frowns at him. "What are you planning?"

"I'm going to stop their experiments any way I can. Even if it means taking the ranches down myself."

"He'll kill you."  
"I'll run. I can't allow Yggdrasill to keep ruining people's lives anymore."

It's been a long time since Yuan has seen that look in his old friend's eyes. He hadn't realized he'd missed it.

"What's your plan?"

Kratos thinks of the little girl who heard tales of a sister she'd never met, who had had such a suspicious look in her eyes when anyone asked about her family. "You know that ranch not far out of Luin?"

"The misnomer?"

"That's the one." Kratos, Yuan and Yggdrasill had had a surprisingly in-depth and sane conversation on why the ranch closest to Luin was named the Asgard Ranch. "I'm going to start getting people out."

"Tell me you don't mean everyone at once."

"No, no. That would be idiotic. A few people at a time. I'll tell Kvar that it's transfer orders-"  
"And I'll change the logs to back it up. But where will those people go? Back to their families?"

"This is why we need people less…well-recognized…working with us. I'd suggest spreading them out, one to a few remote villages. We can put them in contact with their families from there. Or, would if we had the manpower to do it."

Yuan rubbed the back of his neck. "…Give me a few weeks and I'll see what I can do about the manpower."

"Can you shave down the time?"

"That's my shortest estimation that could be even vaguely accurate."

"…What with the look?"

"It's going to be weird being among my kinsmen again. Ones who can actually think and act for themselves."

"An entire rebel force of half-elves? That's your plan?"

"Not entirely. But in case you've forgotten, half-elves make excellent mercenaries and martyrs."

Kratos remembers a single black and white photo with four boys smiling precisely the same, a woman who had her arms wrapped around them.

"I remember." How could he not? Memories seemed to be seared into his brain these days. "I'll take walk-arounds of the ranches. Get the inmates to trust me a little so that they don't panic during the actual operation."  
"Sounds like a plan."

They toasted their mostly empty mugs to memories they sometimes wished forgotten. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note:** Been sleeping and watching Burn Notice most of the morning. Gotta love summer vacation.

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/

_Many people say that government is necessary because some men cannot be trusted to look after themselves, but anarchists say that government is harmful because no men can be trusted to look after anyone else. ~Nicolas Walter, __**About Anarchism**_

_-/-/_

"What did you think of your tour through the ranches, Kratos?"  
The man looks over at Yggdrasill, who's right hand is curled around the stem of a wineglass. Kratos still isn't entirely convinced that this is what Mithos would have looked like had he let himself continue aging. Yggdrasill's skin is creamy pale, but Kratos remembers that, after a few weeks working out in the sun, Mithos' skin used to have a light spattering of freckles. Mithos used to hate having his hair in his face; he would push it back and, at one point in their journey when no one could spare a pair of scissors, he'd asked Yuan to cut it with the small dagger that he always kept at his belt. Yuan wasn't allowed to go after anyone hair but his own with something sharp from then on unless in an extreme emergency.

"All was going well." Kratos replied. He wasn't lying, not technically.

"I see. And Kvar? Nothing suspicious?"

"He mentioned something about the Angelus Project. I wasn't aware you'd begun something like that."

"You have been immersed in your work recently, remember?" Kratos knows that he likes to work, likes to have something to do with his hands because if not, the stillness of Derris-Kharlan begins to get to him, but he wasn't, as Yuan had sometimes described him, a workaholic. "Has he tried to compromise it?"

"Not that I could tell. He seemed very pleased with the progress, though he did mention a few hiccups."

"I see." Yggdrasill swirled his glass of wine, staring out into the emptiness of space. "Hiccups are to be expected, I suppose."

"Naturally."

"And Yuan? I have not seen nor heard from him for a few months now. Is he doing well?"

"As well as ever. As far as I know, he's been staying in Meltokio recently. There have been whispers of new laws against half-elves that the Pope is trying to instate."

"And so discrimination continues on…" Yggdrasill sips at his wine. Kratos can't remember when his—could they still be called friends?—fellow angel, then, had begun enjoying the taste of alcohol.

"That it does." Kratos hesitates before asking, "In my tour of the ranches, something…troubled me."

Yggdrasill arches a feathery eyebrow. He can't remember the last time that Kratos had ever admitted that something troubled him. "Really?"

"The Desians…they oppress the humans."

"Yes." Yggdrasill isn't sure where Kratos is going with this. They'd all sat down that day, millennia ago, and come up with the intricate web of lies that would cloak the worlds during the aftermath of the war.

"How is that any different from what the humans did to the half-elves? You're making your entire race's name become sullied."

"Do you agree with the humans, Kratos?" Yggdrasill asks quietly and Kratos fights the instinct to tense at the too soft voice.

"On the whole, of course not." Kratos had been just as oppressed by humans growing up as the half-elves had been. "But on the subject of taking their families away from them and depleting the mana, yes, I do."

"You know why it is necessary."

"I do, but the plan was not to oppress the humans for four thousand years." Kratos can feel his temper, long asleep, beginning to stir. This wasn't the best of situations for it to happen, but he hadn't heard from Yuan on the half-elf situation and the fact that he had to wait and play dutiful servant while those people were suffering was making it all too easy.

"It takes time to rid the world of discrimination, Kratos." Yggdrasill can't pretend he's not grateful to Kratos at times like this. It is the human who reminds him precisely why they were still alive after so long when the memories slowly begun to fade at the edges.

Kratos leashes his temper tightly and buries it deeply once more. "Of course. I apologize for the rudeness." The apology is an automatic afterthought, a just in case measure against Yggdrasill's wrath.

"You don't have to apologize. You know that. I appreciate your insight." Kratos can hear that Yggdrasill is almost within spitting distance of sanity now, something that becomes increasingly rare as time goes ever on and on.

-/-/-/

"….Tos."

Someone was calling his name and gently shaking his shoulder.

"…ratos!"

A frustrated fist punched his bare shoulder. "Dammit, Kratos, if you're not awake by the count of three..."

Kratos' eyes snapped open. He'd been on the receiving end of Yuan's admittedly creative ways of getting Kratos out of bed before and he had no desire to let it happen again.

"Yes, mother, I'm awake." Kratos said, voice slightly irritable. It wasn't often that he managed to get more than an hour or so's worth of sleep.

Yuan plops down on Kratos' bed, holding out an apple while munching on another one. Kratos accepts it and takes a bite before asking, "So what was simply so important you couldn't wait for me to wake up?"

"I thought you should know that I think I've found a good second-in-command for this rebel army of mine." Because Kratos isn't supposed to be involved and even if he had been, Kratos and Yuan had long ago—long before they'd ever before even heard the name Martel—agreed that they were equals, so neither of them could ever be each other's second-in-command.

"How'd you find him?"

"How sexist of you, automatically assuming it's a he." Yuan smirked at him as he leaned back, lounging on one elbow. "Are you of the opinion that a woman could not do a better job than a man?"  
"How did you find 'this person', then? How's that?"

"Turns out that Asgard is still the favorite town of half-elves. They've got a little community there, practically on the cliffs rather than on the side of them."

"They didn't all agree to join you, did they?"

"No, no. They live in relative peace, remember? Asgard hasn't really been bothered by the Desians besides the taxes and the occasional wildcard. But that's where most of them were. There were two sisters in Hima that joined up as soon as I asked. Palmacosta had a few that worked on the docks. Triet had almost none."

"Just in Sylvarant?"

"So far, yes. And I thought of something while I was finding all these people—we need to find some place where Yggdrasill won't find us."

"A base?"

"Exactly, thank you. We need an isolated place that people can still get to and where the Desians won't go."

Kratos stood, stretching and feeling the satisfying pop of sleeping joints. He went to one of the floor-to-ceiling bookshelves that took up the entirety of one of his walls and slipped out a rolled sheaf of papers before returning to the bed.

Yuan helped unroll the parchments and he remembered helping Kratos sketch them, centuries ago. Yuan had been the surveillance, the one who walked the long miles and returned to report the information. He hadn't minded; it had been something to get his mind off of Martel's death, which had still been weighing heavily on his mind then.

The parchment was aged and yellowed, worn at the edges like the three photographs that Yuan had from those times. Yuan snatched a pencil from a small cup that Kratos kept on his bedside table and circled several points on the Sylvarant map.

"These are the ranches. They've got one on each continent and technically two on the continent of Thoda if you count Rodyle's, since it's just off the coast and they've got Magnius."

"So obviously, no base on Thoda." Kratos surmised.

"What about Asgard's area? All they've got is Kvar's ranch and it's the largest one. The Desian patrols can't be everywhere."

"The problem being that Kvar has a strong hold of the continent, particularly in Luin. His Desians are in every town. And if he starts asking questions, all he needs to do is press his advantage and the people will talk."

"The only place left is Triet's continent and I'm not sure that's such a good idea. Since it's so small, Forcystus has a strong hold on it all." Yuan pointed out.

"Perhaps. But the desert deters everyone from staying too long and there's no way they could search it all. And Triet isn't fond of the Desians-"

Yuan snorted. "Is anyone?"

Kratos ignored the interruption. "So Triet wouldn't sell you out if you happened to buy, in bulk, goods enough to feed and house all these people you've found."

"Are you saying we should build this base in the desert?"

"Do you have a better plan?"

"We need the materials to build a base and even if we got them, you want to have them building in that heat?"

"The people of Triet…they live in that heat." Kratos said slowly. "They must have ways of getting around it. There must be certain materials that they use while building that won't heat up as quickly, that trap the cooler air inside."

"I'll start asking around tomorrow." Yuan stood and took two steps before he turned back to his friend. "These people you're going to be busting out of the ranches…some of them must be fighters."

Kratos remembers the test subject—what had it been? A2103 or something?—that had been being beaten when he'd toured Kvar's ranch. "Yeah, they're there."

"When you get them out, ask if they wouldn't mind fighting with us."

"What happened to it being another half-elf rebel fighting force?"

Yuan ran a hand through his bangs. "The way I figure it, if these people are suffering the same, they can fight the same. Are you going to start getting people out?"

"I'll find the blueprints for the ranch. Find the exits, the entrances, the guard shifts, the alarm codes, all of it. I figure we can get maybe four or so people out at a time."

"Got it. And I'll start setting up safe houses in Izlood and Triet, places where the escapees won't be bothered much."

"Sounds good."

Yuan grinned suddenly and looked at Kratos over his shoulder. "At least there's no oceans in the desert."

"You're only glad about that because you hate water." Kratos had long ago learned that, other than the occasional refreshing dip in a river and bathing, Yuan hated swimming. "I think those dock-workers from Palmacosta are going to disagree with you on that point."

"At least it'll give us something to talk about."

-/-/-/

The prisoners are gaunt things, with lean, hungry eyes. Kratos is reminded a little of wolves. Kratos can feel their misery, their fear. There are open, bloody sores visible from the rips in their rags.

There are no guards on Kratos—why guard one of the men responsible for all of this?—and even if there had been, he could have killed them in an instant. Kratos crouches before a man who might once have been tall, but the small cells had stooped his shoulders.

"How would you like to escape?" Kratos asks quietly.

The man looks at him and is about to open his mouth when a woman in the next cell calls, "Don't fall for it, Indri! Guy's just here to torture us some more."

Indri looks back at Kratos. "Is this true?"

"No, it isn't. My name is Kratos Aurion. I can help you escape, but only if you trust me."

"Is it just me or can you help the others too?"

"I can take four of you at a time. Have you any family here?"

"My wife was taken with me, but I've no idea if she's here. They keep us apart, y'see."

"What's your wife's name?"

"Marian. We were just coming into Palmacosta to deliver a shipment of gels, but they took us. I don't even know if our son is alright."

Kratos stood and asked in a loud whisper if anyone knew a Marian. Everyone shook their heads, but there was one boy—heavens above, but he couldn't be more than six—who said, "I heard the guards mention her name. Said something about being taken to an island ranch or something."

Rodyle's then. Kratos knew that where Rodyle was the cruelest of the Cardinals, Kvar was a very close second.

"Alright." Kratos bends, picking the lock in four seconds, one for each tumbler. Yuan had known several skills that Kratos hadn't when they'd met and Yuan had been more than happy to teach him. "Indri, go with the boy. I'll get two more people out."

"What abou' the rest of us?" A teenager asked. "You gonna leave us here to die, is that it?"

"I'll come back for you." Kratos promises. "You can't all escape at the same time. It would make the guards suspicious."

The prisoners nodded. They were people who understood discretion.

As Kratos picks the other two's locks—an older man whose hair was more gray than dark brown and a girl on the cusp of womanhood—the boy has a tight hold on Indril's hand.

"Sir."

Kratos turned and recognized two of Yuan's people. The sisters from Hima, if he wasn't mistaken. "What is it?"

"Sir, Kvar's heading this way. He wants to speak with you."

"Thank you for the warning."

"He'll kill us." The girl whispered fearfully.

"No, he won't." Kratos said firmly before looking back at the sisters, the elder one. "Kara, was your name, wasn't it?"

"Aye sir."

"You go with them out the back. You must not be seen. If you're noticed, tell the guards that they were attempting a prison escape. Just go with it from there. Get going."

"Sir." Kara briefly squeezes the prisoners on the shoulder before leading them out.

Kratos turned to the other sister, his mind coming up with ideas almost too fast for him to register them. "Sarah, right? I'll meet Kvar at the door. Count to fifty and then run up and pretend that you've just noticed the prisoners are missing."

"Got it."

Kratos strode out a side door and made his way back as though he was going to the cells.

"Lord Kratos."

There were only two people who managed to say his 'title' with such a slippery, smooth voice and only one of them was male. Kratos turned. "Kvar."

"I wasn't aware that another tour of my ranch was necessary. Was something not to Lord Yggdrasill's satisfaction?"

Kvar watched as Kratos' eyes steeled. "I don't believe that that is any of your business."

"Of course not. My apologies."

The doors burst open and both men turned. "Sir! There's a problem! Prisoners…they're missing!"

"What?" Kvar said sharply before pushing past her to enter the cells, Kratos following at his heels. "How could you let this happen?"

Sarah blinked and opened his mouth to reply, but Kvar didn't answer. "A012, where is it?"

"I'm sorry, did you stutter?" A woman's voice floated over. "I'm not an 'it'."

"No, I did not." Kvar strode swiftly to a cell against the far wall. "Now, tell me what happened."

"Pardon?"

"You know what happened. You're most likely the one who instigated all of this."

"So why is it automatically me?" The woman demanded.

"You seem to be behind every indiscretion that happens in my ranch."

"So this is not the only one?" Kratos inserted himself into the conversation smoothly.

"Sir-"

"You have allowed others to escape from your ranch before? You are shirking your responsibilities, Kvar." Kratos thought he heard someone snicker and he was almost sure that it was the woman, A012. "Understand that I'll be speaking to Lord Yggdrasill about this. In the meantime, I believe you have fugitives to catch?"

-/-/-/

Yuan grinned at Kratos. "So how was chewing Kvar out?"

"Refreshing."

Indri looked at them. "Where are you taking us?"

The old friends glanced at each other and back at the fugitives. "The original plan was to send each of you to a different location and we would send your families there as well. But in this case, I think you can pretend to be family."

"Where will we go?"

"Izlood. They don't ask many questions there and the Desians don't visit. Any of you have any idea how to get there?"

"I have cousins in Izlood." The girl spoke up. "Mama used to talk about them. Said that if I ever needed to go someplace, to go there. But it's so far from here, how will we make it?"

Yuan went behind some trees and led two horses out that were leading a small covered wagon. "Like this. These horses are getting on a little in years, but they are loyal, gentle and strong. There are supplies inside."

"Sir…how can we thank you?"

Yuan smiled. "But getting out of here. Kvar's guards will be scouring the area."

The girl leaned up to kiss him on the cheek. "May the Goddess Martel bless you."

Kratos waited until they were out of earshot to say, "How is it that you still get all of the women?"

Yuan chuckled, grateful for the distraction from Martel. "It's 'cause I'm prettier."

-/-/-/

"Whose idea was it to build a base in the desert again?"

Kratos didn't look up from his book. "Mine."

"This is the last time I listen to your insane ideas." Yuan told him as he fell back on the bed, laying half across Kratos' legs.

"No it isn't. And get off me. You smell."

"This, my dear friend, is the smell of almost two whole days working beneath the hot sun with sand getting in places I didn't even know I had."

"You know, there was this fantastic invention a few thousand years ago called a shower. Surely you've heard of it. I hear it's all the rage with the kids."

Yuan flopped his arm in Kratos' general direction. It wasn't that he hadn't done work just as hard before or in heat just as bad. But it had been a long time and then he'd gotten sleep in between it all before. "Hush, bookmaster. I need not hear your scolding."

"Did you make progress at least?"

"Have you ever tried laying a foundation on sand, Kratos? It's a bloody nightmare. The sand keeps shifting underneath you and nothing wants to settle."

Kratos looked at him over the book. "Is this your way of asking for my help or are you simply complaining?"

"A bit of both, but more of the first one. I'm not exactly good at earth magic, you know that."

"I remember. Now that I think about it, did you even think to take off your cape and armor when you were helping?"

"Yes, actually. But that didn't much change that the heat nearly killed us, beating down like it was."

Kratos closed the book and shifted his legs underneath Yuan's weight as a sign for him to get up. Yuan obeyed and stood, though he stayed leaning on the bedpost. "I'll make you a deal. You take a shower and I'll help."

"Really? I need to make a deal to get help from a close friend?"

"You do if you don't want to spend long hours in the hot sun trying to lay a foundation."

Yuan glared at him. "This is blackmail."

"Yes it is." Kratos left the deal hanging in the air. Yuan knew that tactic and hated it because it always worked.

"Fine. But I'm using your bathroom."

Kratos blinked. "Why?"

"So I can use up all the hot water."

"You know I can fix that very easily."

Yuan waved a hand airily. "Details. It's causing you an inconvenience."

"Not a very large one."

The half-elf looked back at his friend. "Well, all you're really making me do for this deal is take a shower. It's not like I wasn't going to do that eventually anyway and now I get something in exchange."

Kratos waits until Yuan comes out of the shower twenty minutes later to tell him that he'd been planning to help regardless of whether Yuan took the deal or not.

-/-/-/

The half-elves were all watching Kratos warily as he walked up to Yuan.

"Who is this man?" One of them asked. "I thought that there would be no humans to know of this?"

"Kratos is different." Yuan explained. "He's a friend and he was the one who's been helping me and he's here to help us with the construction."

"I also stopped by Triet before I came here." Kratos told them. "Yuan told me that you guys were having trouble with the elements."

"That's putting it lightly!" Someone called.

"I asked them how they dealt with living in the desert. One of them told me about their head wrappings."

"I always heard that was part of some ancient religion of theirs." One of the men said. He had dark hair that had been whipped into disarray by the strong winds and he had the beginnings of a beard. His ears were more noticeably triangular than most half-elves. "To Efreet, wasn't it?"

Kratos and Yuan glanced at each other and then at him. "Yes, that's right." Kratos said. "There aren't many who even remember a religion other than that of the Goddess Martel." As always, a slight pang accompanied the saying of her name. "What's your name?"

"Botta, of Palmacosta. And the only reason I know anything about it is because I worked as a janitor in the Palmacosta Academy for some time. I used to take an hour or so to look through the manuscripts they had. One of them mentioned ancient religions."

Yuan frowned. "Was there very much on the ancient religions?"

"No. In most textbooks, there was hardly mention of anything other than the Goddess. That manuscript was the one of very few that had more than a few sentences on the subject."  
"I'm surprised you found even that much." Yuan said.

Kratos met his eyes.

Botta looked between them. "I have never before seen two people have an entire conversation using absolutely no words at all."

"Most of it usually comprises of Kratos calling me an idiot half the time." Yuan told him. "Now then, friend who loves to degrade me, what about the Trietians?"

Kratos' brow creased in a frown. "That's can't be right."

"That's beside the point. What about them?"

"Their head wrapping is more than a tribute to their ancient religion. I don't think most of them even believe in it anymore anyway, but it's practical as well. They serve as protection from the wind, the sand and the heat."

There were murmurs of 'Oh' and 'That makes sense'.

"We don't have any head wrappings." Yuan reminded him. "But now that I think about, we aren't wearing our travelling cloaks anyway, with this heat. Think they could work?"

Kratos shrugged. "I suppose."

As everyone began wrapping their cloaks around their heads, some with rather amusing results, Kratos asked Yuan quietly, "Do they know? About everything?"  
"They know the gist of it."  
"Explain the gist."

"They know that the Church and Martel is all a lie. They don't know anything about you and me or Mithos, don't know anything about Tethe'alla."

"You have to tell them eventually. Secrets that big this early on is only going to make rebellion easier. They could try and overthrow you and even if, by some wild chance, they succeed, the entire organization would collapse because they don't understand how Yggdrasill thinks, how he moves. These aren't seasoned warriors or spies, Yuan."

"I know. I'm just trying to figure out how I tell them something like that."

"That, I can't help you with."

Yuan sighed before saying, "Come on. You can lay the foundation down while I try and get this turban thing to work."

"Close to the cliffs then?"

"Yeah."

Kratos called to mind the sketchy blueprints that Yuan had shown him. The half-elf had never been the best with the mathematical portion of his education, but he'd gotten close enough that Kratos, with a few alterations, could work with it.

Kratos knelt in the hot sand and murmured, "Grave." And felt the rush of mana that always accompanied a spell. But rather than directing the spires of rock upwards like he would for an attack, he laid them flat and side-by-side.

The half-elves all stared at the man who'd fearlessly walked into their camp, had spoken to them like equals. Humans weren't supposed to be able to do magic. That was one of the main reasons for the hatred against any of elven blood. Humans often though magic unnatural and eerie.

Yuan stood on the new stone that Kratos had conjured, looking nearly unrecognizable in the turban and cowl that his cloak was doubling as. All Kratos could see of his friend's familiar face were the green eyes.

The half-elven angel took a few steps across the stone, even jumping on it once. "Think you can build the rest of it for us too, Kratos?" Yuan asked, smiling over at his friend.

Kratos shook his head. "Nope. This is good for all of you. Think of it like…a trust-building exercise. Teamwork. If none of you are pushed off down to the hot, unforgiving sand below, then I think you guys can fight Cruxis together."

"You have a very extreme view of trust." Yuan told him sourly as he helped one of the others stand a tall beam up in one of the holes Kratos had left for them.

"Have fun." Kratos ignored the admittedly creative curse that Yuan shouted at him as he took off across the sands.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note:** Anna finally has a real part! Sorry for the slowness that this is all progressing with.

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/

_We feel free when we escape - even if it be but from the frying pan into the fire. ~Eric Hoffer_

_-/-/_

"Lord Kratos."

The seraph looked up at the interruption of his work and was slightly surprised to see Forcystus. It wasn't often that he had contact with this particular Grand Cardinal.

"Lord Forcystus, what brings you here?"

Forcystus walked to one of the blackwood bookcases lining the walls of Kratos' study and ran a finger down the spines of the books. "I had no idea you were such an avid reader."

"Reading is an important part of anyone's education." Kratos said, crossing his legs. "But I cannot understand what my reading habits have to do with your visit."

"Small talk, Lord Kratos. That was all it was. I was taught that that was the polite thing to do when going into a meeting."

"I wasn't aware this was a meeting. Unless you have something of reasonable importance to tell me, I've got quite a bit of work to get done."

"There is something, actually. The Cardinals have all been talking recently. Sharing information, you understand, and Kvar mentioned something about you."

"Did he?"

"He said something about how apparently his security is rather lax."

"It was. The day I arrived, there were prisoners missing from their cells. Have they been recovered yet?"

"I see…Kvar failed to inform us of their escape. I shall be sure to keep an eye out for them."

"I trust that you shall not let them escape."

"There are plenty more humans in the world."

"I wasn't aware that you were inclined to unnecessary sadism, Lord Forcystus."

"Sadism, my Lord? Is that how you think of what we do?"

"I can describe some of the practices that happen at the human ranches as sadistic, yes."

"Our practices are necessary to awaken the Exspheres, you know that, sir. I assure you, we don't harm the prisoners needlessly."

"At your ranch, I'm sure you don't." Kratos had heard of Forcystus' heroism during the skirmishes that happened for over a millennia after the Kharlan War. "But I have seen several practices at some of the other ranches that I cannot agree with."

"So you do still feel some pity for your race?" Kratos looked back up, frowning slightly at the way those red eyes were looking at him. "I had wondered, you see. There's been whispers about you for centuries, saying that you're not absolutely loyal to Lord Yggdrasill."

"If you are suggesting that I am, in some way, fooling Lord Yggdrasill, then by all means, take your suspicions to him."

Forcystus was well aware of how far Lord Yggdrasill's trust extended when it came to Kratos Aurion. They'd become comrades during the War and Forcystus knew all too well how difficult it was to break the bond between war comrades.

"…I see. Thank you for your time, sir."

-/-/-/

"What has that paper done to you that it deserves such a glare?" Kratos asked as he took a seat across from Yuan's desk.

"Magic circles frustrate me to no end." Yuan snarled.

Kratos knew that Yuan was very instinctive in the way he used his magic; he could remember the ease with which the spells that commanded thunder had come to him, but he knew that Yuan had very little patience for the small nuances of magic, for the logic and technicalities of it.

"What is it that you're trying to do?"

Yuan leaned back in his chair, running his ink-stained hands through his hair, leaving black streaks. "I'm trying to tweak the spell that keeps Derris-Kharlan hidden."

"Is this at Mithos' request?" Mithos rarely requested anything, but when it meant help with a spell, Yuan was usually the one he called on. Though Kratos can't imagine why Derris-Kharlan needed more hiding. It was invisible as it was.

"No. I'm trying to make a variation of it—on a smaller scale obviously—to help hide the base, just in case the Desians decide to do something…unexpected. But it's tricky."

Kratos stood and walked around the desk, leaning on the arm of the chair as he inspected what Yuan had sketched. "Did you consider the air density?"

"Yes, I did. That's part of the problem. It's so damn dry in Triet that some of the humidity is taken away, but it's still much denser than up in space."

Kratos tapped the string of symbols on the bottom curve of the magic circle. "This is unnecessary. That's only there to keep Derris-Kharlan tethered to the Tower of Salvation. From what I understand, your base isn't going to go floating into space without a tether."

"Makes sense. But what would take its place? The circle needs to be balanced."

Both of their heads jerked up when they heard the door open. Yggdrasill took a step inside and the lovely face creased slightly with a frown. "What's going on?"

Yuan let out a silent sigh of relief. It might be Yggdrasill's face, but it was Mithos' personality that they were dealing with. While Mithos might have a touch more cruelty to him, he was also easier to read.

"Kratos was telling me of problems in the human ranches, something about a few security breaches."

"That's right."

"The people that escaped from Kvar's ranch must have had outside help. It would have been the only way out. And the only way that they had outside help was because people knew where the ranch was."

"With you so far."

"I was thinking that we could adjust the spell on Derris-Kharlan so that it would make the ranches invisible to the naked eye."  
"As good an idea as that is, wouldn't it be a little difficult during prisoner transfer for them to actually find the ranch?"

"That's why I'm tweaking it. But it's proving tricky."

"You'd have to take the mass of the ranch into consideration, wouldn't you?"

"I'd say yes, but if this is a variation of the other spell, how did we ever take the mass of Derris-Kharlan? It's enormous." Kratos pointed out.  
"Light is a problem, isn't it? Light and the temperature, since the both of those combined could shift the air so that the illusion is dispelled."

Yuan growled in frustration. "This is going to take a lot more research."

"It's not like you haven't been dying to retreat back into your books lately anyway." Kratos says and Yuan sighs.

"Won't deny that, but this needs to get done."

"I don't think it needs to be done right away." Yggdrasill says, leaning a hip on the desk. "Kvar has spent the past hour describing to me, in great detail, just how much extra security he was adding to his ranch to ensure that there are no more escapes."

"And we all know how much you hate hearing the old bat drone on." Yuan said, smirking as he leaned back in his seat.

"Who doesn't?" Yggdrasill muttered.

"Kvar was never a man who struck me as paranoid." Yuan commented. "He seriously added enough security to go on for an hour because of a few escapees?"  
"He seemed rather concerned about the Angelus Project."

"Yes, apparently the host that has been the most responsive has been giving him some…problems. It's a surprise that it's still alive, really. Going on eight years or so that the host has been in there."

"Any results?" Yuan asked. "Isn't that the project that's supposed to make creating a Cruxis Crystal faster?"

"Kvar believes he's close to a breakthrough." Yggdrasill said.

Yuan snorted. "Right. He'd get a breakthrough if any of his subjects lived long enough to see the end of the project."  
"Take it up with him if you've got such a problem with it. I see no problem with how he's doing his experiments. He's getting results, albeit rather slowly. Perhaps I'll have Pronyma introduce the process to Tethe'alla, see if they can't find some results."  
"Wouldn't that take away the point of the hourglass effect of the two worlds if we set up ranches in Tethe'alla?"

"Not ranches. Individual experiments. They'd study the Chosen's own Cruxis Crystal and attempt the project with their own citizens. It's not a solid plan yet, just an idea." Yggdrasill sighed, ran a hand through his pale blonde hair. "I have to go back."

"Were you only in here to hide from your meeting with the Cardinals?" Yuan asked knowingly, folding his fingers in a steeple and resting his elbows on the desk. Yggdrasill glared a little at him, but Yuan just smirked a little. "Have fun, _Lord_ Yggdrasill."

After Yggdrasill had left, Kratos looked over at his friend. "One of these days, you are going to push him too far and I am not saving your ass that day."

-/-/-/-/

"I had no idea the construction had progressed this far." Kratos told Yuan as he took in the admittedly large structure. It was nearly half the size of the cliff. "I can see why you wanted that invisibility spell."

Yuan wiped his face with a towel. When he was working out in the desert, he'd taken to wearing a white tank top as well as a pair of cotton trousers in addition to his makeshift cowl. "We're nearly finished with the outside. We just need to build the roof."

"And no one has died yet? Impressive." Kratos' eye was caught by several of the men carrying an enormous crate. "What's that?"

"Polycarbonate. This place has to be a fortress, Kratos. If the invisibility spell fails, we need to be able to defend against magic." Seeing the look on the human's face, Yuan added, "Relax. We're not building it entirely out of polycarbonate. We can't smuggle that much material without Yggdrasill noticing anyway. It's just a layer over the actual structure. I asked around in Triet and I found out what they built their buildings of. It's a mixture of vermiculate and ceramic coating. So far so good at keeping what little rain there's been out, but it's much cooler on the inside."

"So what exactly is going to be on the inside of this base? If your going to want magitechnology-"

"I know, I know. We won't need as much magitechnology as the Desians since I plan on teaching these guys at least some basic magic. First Aid, definitely, and maybe a few offensive things. If we can find a way to keep the energy going, we won't need to rely on mana to run it all the time."

Kratos frowned at the fuzzy outline of Triet in the distance. "They have an oasis, don't they?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Couldn't you find a way to link the water over here? Like a waterwheel, but on a bigger scale."

Yuan shook his head. "If the Desians search Triet—you know Forcystus, he's very thorough about things like that—he'd find the pipe and trace it back here. We need a different energy source."

Kratos sat on a boulder, lifting a knee and letting his arm rest on it. "…Efreet's influence is still powerful here."

"Obviously, Kratos."

"Why not use that? Turn it to your advantage? Heat is a source of energy, isn't it?"  
"You're the one that's gotta answer that question, not me. You're the one who actually got to go to school, remember?"

"That's not a valid excuse. I taught you everything I learned."

"I never thought that there'd be so much research involved when I set out on this insane idea of yours. Building a base in the desert…it's the stupidest one yet." Yuan stretched and took a few long sips from his canteen. "Where are you headed from here? The ranch?"

"Mm. This Angelus Project…something doesn't sit right with me about it."

"Besides the moral aspect of keeping humans for sadistic experiments?"

"Yes, besides that. It shouldn't take eight years for a Cruxis Crystal to form. Ours didn't."

"We were in the middle of a war, Kratos." Yuan pointed out. "A war that had been going on since we were kids."

"The conditions in those ranches are just as bad as those in the war. Worse, technically. Anyone who was fighting in the war could have run, cold have deserted if they wanted to. The prisoners…they can't."

"You think Kvar has something to do with that?"

"Absolutely. He's a scientist. He wants to see all the possibilities, want to test everything. He might even have delayed the process if he was testing on the crystal itself."

Yuan narrowed his eyes, searching Kratos' features. "Has the heat gotten to you? Tell me you're not planning to break out Kvar's favorite test subject."

"We'd have to bust them out eventually."

"Kvar would kill for the Angelus Project and you know it. What happens if you get caught?"

Kratos arched an eyebrow. "Have I ever gotten caught?"

Yuan jerked Kratos' arm forward, holding it firmly just above the elbow. With his other arm, Yuan pointed at a faded white scar that passed from nearly his shoulder to the inside of his elbow. "Do you remember that?"

_Green eyes burning bright as the flames…Shamed…how could…traitor!_  
Kratos' eyes darkened. "Yes, I do. Not that I needed your reminding."

"Clearly you do if you think you can't get caught. And you'd not only be getting yourself probably killed, you'd be killing that poor prisoner as well."

"I'm well aware that my actions have consequences, Yuan." Kratos said, twisting his arm free of his friend's grip. "If it makes you feel better, I'll be a little extra careful."

Yuan pressed his lips into a thin line. "…Fine."

-/-/-/

When Kratos was entering the prisoner's cells in the Asgard cell, they were carrying a limp prisoner into the cell farthest down. Kratos kept back near the wall, using the low lighting to his advantage. It wasn't hard to bring back his childhood instincts to keep invisible.

As the guards stomped back out, Kratos crossed the room—most of the prisoners were out in the yard now—and peered into the cell. The prisoner had a tangled mass of brown hair that was so filled with dirt that it appeared black in the bad lighting. Kratos frowned when a coppery scent reached his nose, one that he recognized well. The scent of blood.

"Lord Kratos…I wasn't aware that you were coming today and I had no idea that we were so far in our…relationship…that you could drop by unexpectedly."

Kratos looked over at Kvar, who was walking towards him with his hands behind his back. "Lord Yggdrasill wished for me to see how the ranch operates without my presence here."

"And is it to your satisfaction? I'm sure you've noticed that our security has been upgraded."

Kratos ignored the question. "This prisoner is bleeding."

"Yes, well, it has been rather rebellious lately. Natural side effects of the evolving of the Cruxis Crystal naturally. Until the emotions of the body become settled, they tend to fluctuate."

"Lord Yggdrasill wants his prisoners alive, Kvar. They can't stay alive if their wounds become infected."

"You make an excellent point, Lord Kratos. I shall send for a guard to treat her wounds-"

"No. I shall do it since your staff has been incompetent with it so far. Unlock the cell."

Kvar's eyes narrowed, but he obeyed. Kratos entered the small cell—he couldn't even stand upright and Kratos had never been a particularly tall man—and maneuvered the woman so that he could carry her comfortably. He was disturbed by how unnaturally light she was, but made no mention of it.

"I'll have to borrow your medical facilities."

Kvar smiled tightly. "Of course. Just down the hall, two lefts and a right."

It was halfway to the infirmary that the woman stirred. Light brown eyes cracked open, blinking blearily for a moment before the situation registered.

"Let me go, you Desian scum!" She cried, beating a fist against Kratos' chest. It might actually have hurt if she had any muscle to have backed it up.

"Calm yourself. I am not going to hurt you. I must take you to the infirmary."

She frowned at him. In a quieter voice, she asked, "You're the one that busted Indri and the others out, aren't you?"

Kratos closed the infirmary doors behind them and set her down on the uncomfortable looking chair. "Yes, I am. I wouldn't spread it around though."

The woman snorted. "Obviously."

Kratos dug through the drawers and cabinets until he found the bandages and antiseptic. "Where were you wounded?"

Instantly, she was suspicious. "Why're you healing me? You didn't heal Indri."

"I can't use the same excuse over and over. Kvar would get suspicious."

"Is that the son of a bitch's name? Good, now I know what to put on the tombstone." She looked up at Kratos and something she found there must have amused her because she began chuckling, but stopped abruptly, putting a hand to her ribs.

Kratos pulled up a tall stool and set the bandages and antiseptic on a tray. "I'm going to have to ask you to remove your shirt."

"Go to hell." She snarled, clasping the flimsy rags—really, he was being kind calling it a shirt—closer to her.

Kratos grasped her wrists_ (they were too thin, far too thin)_. "I know what women look like." He snapped, gently pulling her arms out of the way so that he could tug the shirt high enough so that he could see her ribs. In truth, it was far too easy. He hardly had to use any force at all.

Her ribs were a mass of mottled bruises and split skin. Kratos pressed lightly on one and she yelped. "They broke one, possibly two. What is it that you did to deserve that treatment?" Kratos asked, murmuring a First Aid for the ribs. The outside would have to heal naturally.

"None of us did anything to deserve being in this hellhole or haven't you realized that yet?"

"Glad to see this place hasn't rid you of that sort of thinking."

"Why are you here anyway? Why do you even care about us?"

"This place isn't right." Kratos replied quietly as he carefully poured the disinfectant onto a hand-towel and gently patted it on her ribs, making her hiss at him. "No one should have to go through such things."

"You have to get some people out of here."

Kratos glanced up at her. "In general or do you have someone specific in mind?"

"There are two twins a few cells over from mine. Kvar's planning to use them for experiments. I heard one of the guards talking to him about it. Apparently, he plans to kill one twin once the other dies to perform comparative autopsies."

"Anyone else?"

"Cheri. She's across the room from where I am. She found out she was pregnant a few weeks ago—she's new, ya know? Came in about four days back—and we all know what Kvar does with pregnant women."

Seeing the look in her eyes, Kratos decided he'd much rather not know. "I'll get them out." He promised. "Has Kvar run experiments on you as well?" He asked after seeing the round white scars that dotted the inside of her elbows.

"He likes to experiment on me the most. Don't know why. He always says something 'bout an Angel something or other Project."

"Angelus Project?"

"That thing."

He was about to begin wrapping the bandages around her waist, but his eyes caught an angry red line that just curved around from her back. "Turn, please."

The woman rolled her eyes, but obeyed. Kratos felt the anger rise instantly at the sight of her back, but he quickly pushed it down. A healing room was no place for anger.

Burns, old and new, were splotched all across her shoulder blades. Lacerations criss-crossed her back, overlaying old scars. Some were fresh, open and dripping beads of bright red blood and others had begun to heal over.

She winced as he disinfected it all and muttered a creative array of curses beneath her breath. She didn't object this time when he had to lift the shirt over her head entirely to properly bandage her back. The anger rose again, a little higher this time, at the welts on her arms, but he couldn't worry about those.

Kratos sat back, inspecting his handiwork. The bandages were tied just tightly enough, but it wasn't the injuries that lay beneath them that he was most concerned about. It was the fact that he could count her ribs, each and every one.

He dug through his pocket and pulled out a small pear that he'd grabbed from the pile that Yuan's group had for when they tired. "Take this."

The woman did, watching him warily. "What'd you do to it?"

"Nothing. They're starving you all."

"Excellent work, Captain Obvious." She said, taking a bite. A smile dawned on her face. "This is fantastic. The first real food I've had in eight years."

"I need to know the names of those twins if I'm going to help smuggle them out of here without causing a big commotion."

The woman shrugged. "I can't help you there. All I know is that they're originally from Asgard, but the Desians captured them on the way to visit some family in Palmacosta."

"…I see."

"Y'know, this pear tastes almost as good as the ones we had back home. My best friend, his parents had a pear tree in their yard and we used to eat them during the summer."

"…Where did you grow up?"

She blinked up at him and Kratos recognized those eyes. They were precisely the same as the little girl's who'd come up the day before he'd decided to break people out of the ranch. "Luin."

"Really…" Kratos remembered the mother of the little girl, whose daughter had been taken eight years ago. "…You're Anna, aren't you?"  
"And how would you know that?"

"I met your mother in Luin the last time I was there."

Anna smiled wide. "Are you serious? Is she doing okay? She's never been in the best of health…"

"She looked fine." Kratos assured her.

"Thanks so much. I missed my mother for a long time."

"Missed? So you don't anymore?"

Anna lifted and dropped her small shoulders in a shrug. "After a few months here, when you figure out that you're probably never getting out, you learn to stop thinking about it. It just makes it hurt less."

Kratos sighed and knew he was going to get chewed out by Yuan later by what he was about to ask. "Would you like to escape today?"

"...What?"

"I don't like repeating myself."

"Well it's not exactly like someone offers me an escape from a hellhole every day!"

"So…is that a yes?" Kratos swears that, even if he does live until time itself ends, he will never understand women. Even Martel, as forward and simple as she was, had had her many moments when he'd been left utterly confused.

"No, it's every girl's dream to be stuck in a prison."

Kratos chose to ignore that and said, "I can't get all of you out now. It'll have to wait for tonight."

"Sure. It's not like a few more hours here will matter much."

-/-/-/

"So, you went in, were found, left and you plan to go back tonight and help a pregnant woman, teenage twins and Kvar's favorite test subject?"

"For the fourth time, Yuan, _yes_."

Yuan stopped in his pacing to look back at his friend. He sighed. "Don't use magic."

Kratos glanced up at him. "What?"

"If you're going to sneak those people out, you shouldn't use magic unless you have to. It's another way they can track you now, apparently. I'll meet you outside the ranch with some horses."

"Where are you getting all of these horses? They're not bad ones either." Kratos asked, slipping a knife in each boot and one on his belt.

"There's a horse breeder in Triet. Nice guy. Gives us a good deal since we're helping out with the Desian problem and since we're so good for the local business. Ah, I forgot to mention that a few of my men are going to meet you at the exit. As back-up you understand."

Yuan knew that, instinctively, Kratos didn't much like back-up. He was a natural solitary fighter. But they both knew that back-up was like an umbrella. If you needed it, it was there and if you didn't, no harm done.

"Kratos, I just thought of something. Where are these people going? Since this kind of out of the blue, I didn't have a chance to set them up with a place to live in whatever town you're sending them off to."

"…This was stupid."

"You're only just now figuring that out? Not that it's not noble and all that. You know I'm all for getting these people out, but we're not stabilized enough to be helping people this frequently."

"No, that's not why, though that certainly doesn't help."

Yuan folded his arms across his stomach. "Oh really? What is this thing that has finally made Kratos Aurion see sense?"

"She can't go back home."

"…Pardon?"

"Kvar's favorite test subject. Her name's Anna. She's from Luin. You know that we can't send anyone back to Luin. It's a prime target."

"You promised to send her home, didn't you?"  
"No, I promised her I'd get her out."

"She's certainly not going to see it like that."

Kratos finds it a little disconcerting that their situations are reversed. Four thousand years back, it had been Kratos giving Yuan the lecture on thinking things through and being careful.

"Kratos, I am going to say something that doesn't sound right, but it is the only thing that I can think of that could describe what led to your current situation." Kratos looked at him curiously. "You're going soft."

Now the red-brown eyebrows were arched. He might have taken it for an insult had it come from anyone else, but Yuan's sense of honesty could be rather strong at times. "…I see. This is your conclusion, is it?"

"You've always been the logical one." Yuan explained. "This is the first time I've seen you this illogical in…quite a while."

"Was the last time when we were kids?"

Yuan smiled a little. "How'd you guess?"

…_You can't read?…my friend, Noishe…wake up, it's Celsius Day!…damn uniform…thinking about…swords…run for it!_

-/-/-/-

"So you do keep your promises." Anna said quietly as Kratos picked the lock to her cell.

"Surprise surprise. Come on, we don't have much time." The twins were holding hands tightly and the pregnant woman, Cheri, was glancing around fearfully. "Outside, hurry."

Their footsteps, quiet as they were, sounded too loud in the empty hallways.

"There should be guards." Anna told him, voice low. "This hallway's always guarded pretty heavily."

"That's not good. Keep going for the outside." Kratos turned when he heard the voice of one of Yuan's people.

"Sir, I couldn't distract the guards for much longer. They're coming to make their regular rounds."

Kratos' brow creased with a frown. "Weren't there two of you?"  
The false guard matched his expression. "He said he went to divert more guards in the next hall."

Kratos looked back, extending his senses as far as he could. There was the sound of footsteps, multiple ones, and no sign of a struggle. "Go, now! Get to the exit!"

The prisoners didn't think twice, breaking into a run and turning when Kratos shouted a direction.

"Sir, what's happened? The guards shouldn't have reached us by now." The false guard asked, beginning to pant a little.

"I believe your partner was a traitor. I'll explain later and we can look into the matter later. Right now, the prisoners are the priority."

"But, sir, what if he's _not_ a traitor? We'd be leaving him here to get caught."

"No, he can keep his cover."

Kratos nearly stopped dead when he noticed a familiar person standing in the middle of the control room. "What happened to meeting us outside?"

"You being illogical scares me." Yuan said, flashing a quick, weary smile before waving them all inside an air vent. "Come one, out this way. The guards have already been alerted. They're at every door, every window."

"This won't fool them for long." Kratos murmured, knowing that Yuan could hear him even if the prisoners couldn't. "They'll figure out that we're out and then the manhunt is on."

"It wouldn't be the first time."

"Where're we headed?" Anna asked once they were out. "There's no way we can outrun them all."

"No need to." Yuan whistled once, sharply, and a trio of horses seemed to materialize from the shadows. "Get on a horse, pick a direction and stop at the second town you find."

"But-" Cheri protested, a protective hand on her stomach. She had a point. They couldn't, in good conscience, let a pregnant woman go on her own.

"I'll go with her." The false guard offered. "I can hide her with some family of mine in Hima."

Yuan didn't think twice. His people knew where to find him. "Go. Quickly."

The twins were slight, small and their eyes looked very wide in the darkness. "Where will we go?"

"Anywhere but Luin." Kratos told them. "Try Asgard, but I wouldn't stay there long. That's the next town they will search."

Anna looked back at Kratos, eyes narrowed into a suspicious glare. "You said 'anywhere but Luin'. Where am I supposed to go? My whole family, my entire life is in Luin."  
Yuan looked at Kratos, but subtly raised his hands in the gesture that either meant 'No weapons' or 'I'm staying out of this'.

Kratos sighed. "I never said that you'd be going to Luin. I offered you an escape."

Anna opened her mouth to retort, but snapped it shut when shouting and the thumping of booted feet neared. She mounted the horse in an easy, practiced movement and kicked her heels gently into the horse's sides making it startle into a gallop.

"I don't know whether to call her brave or headstrong." Yuan commented. "Not that it matters. We can't be seen here."

"Go back to your people. I'll tag along with her. The others all went in pairs so they could watch out for each other." Kratos ignored the look that Yuan gave him and took off at a run.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note:** Finished Season three of Burn Notice and I can't wait to see Season 4. Also saw Toy Story 3 for the second time and it doesn't get any less sad.

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/

"_She still has the advantage over us."_

"_Everyone always does. That's what makes us so special."_

_-Zoe and Mal-__**Firefly**_

-/-

Kratos wasn't expecting to be at knifepoint when he finally caught up with Anna. Even with his angelic speed, a spooked horse that was rested was still faster. And still he found himself staring down the small silver blade of a knife at Anna's determined face.

"Are you going to kill me?" Kratos asked calmly. This certainly wasn't the first time this sort of thing had happened and he doubted that this would be the last.

Anna lowered the knife. "How'd you catch up?"

Kratos didn't answer right away, instead distracted by her trembling arms. They'd tired from even that small exertion of keeping a knife held up for a minute. Cleary, she was worse off then she was letting on.

"I'm good at what I do." Was Kratos' only answer. It wasn't as though he could tell her the truth.

"Do we have much of a lead on them?" Anna asked, putting the knife back in the saddlebags that Kratos was sure that Yuan had made sure were stocked full of provisions.

"Not enough to be able to rest. Was the knife in the saddlebags?"

"No. It's yours."

"What?" Kratos hadn't felt a thing, but now that she brought it up, he could feel the knife's slight weight absent from his left boot.

"You pick up a lot of skills in a prison. It was a just-in-case measure. I got it when we were going through the vent. Since you insisted on going first in case there were guards wherever we came out, it wasn't hard."

Kratos thought about arguing it, but decided that he didn't really need the extra knife. He had two others after all and his sword and she needed some way to defend herself if he wasn't nearby. "Get back on the horse. We need to get moving."

Anna obeyed, but held out a stick-thin arm, still bruised and red with welts. "Well come on. I'm not letting you run the rest of the way."

Kratos swung himself onto the horse, but refused to take her arm. He was afraid that he might break her, fragile as she was right now. His arms slipped around her waist to take hold of the reins. He gently kicked the horse into an easy gallop—he didn't want to wear the beast out after all—and headed for the forests that grew on the sides of the mountains.

They'd gone many miles before Anna started in his arms.

"What is it?" Kratos asked, searching for any sign of danger. He hadn't heard or seen anything out of the ordinary, but it was possible he could have missed something. To err was human, after all…

"That… monster!"

Kratos followed her arm to where she pointed and shook his head, dismounting in one smooth motion, though he kept one hand on the reins since the horse was looking mighty skittish.

"He's not a monster." Kratos told her as a wet nose was pushed into his palm. "His name's Noishe. He's traveled with me for years."

Anna tilted her head, studying the creature. Ordinarily, she wouldn't have trusted his words quite so easily, but Noishe was acting very friendly with the man. Noishe was as large as the horse and its coat looked as though pale green paint had been thrown on seafoam.

She dismounted a little clumsily, wincing at the pain in her back, and reached out warily to the creature. "What is he?"

Kratos debated on whether or not to tell her the truth. "…He's a dog. Or so I'm assuming. I was traveling a few years back and he followed me. I couldn't exactly chase him away, so I decided to keep him."

Noishe padded forward, watching her with surprisingly intelligent green eyes that were ringed with gold. Cautiously, Anna petted his head and Noishie's tongue darted out, licking her wrist.

"He's the weirdest dog I've ever seen." Anna commented as she scratched behind his large ears.

"You'll hear no disagreements from me." Noishe whuffed at him and Kratos patted his head in an absent-minded gesture. "The Desians won't search the forests at night. And they don't have enough manpower to search very far right now. Even searching the areas from Hima to Asgard would spread their forces too thin."

Anna eased herself on the ground; her legs were stiff and a little sore from the hard riding and her back stung something terrible. "You know an awful lot about the Desians, don't you?"  
"I had to learn their movements, their ways before I could break everyone out." Kratos replied, digging through the saddlebags. He wasn't hungry _(he doesn't need to eat, but he'll do it because he needs to play human, needs to pretend that the last four thousand years are some sort of terrible nightmare)_ but Yuan had packed foods that didn't spoil too quickly and Anna needed food in her if she was to get any better. And oh, he'd been kind enough to include two small pots and pans.

"You work with that other guy? Mr. Ponytail?" Anna asked as she made to stand. It wasn't as if they were going to sit here in the cold and they needed firewood. Well, cold wasn't quite the proper word as it was spring, but it certainly wasn't warm.

Kratos snorted a little. Yuan was sure to like that one. Mr. Ponytail. "Yes. He has contacts that allow him to get the supplies and places for you escapees to stay." Then he noticed the way she was standing; a little wobbly, but from what he'd learned of her, she was sheer pig-headed and wouldn't admit that her injuries were bothering her. "Sit down." He told her patiently. "I'll get it."

Kratos was startled when, rather than agreeing, Anna immediately whirled to look at him, hands on bony hips and hazel eyes flashing. "Look, I've been feeling damn useless for the past eight years. I need to move, stretch my legs!"

"You're exhausted." He told her flatly. "Relax and let me do it."

Anna eyed him, but she knew the look in his eyes. It was similar to the one her father used to get when he was determined to win an argument, even one as small as deciding who had to get up to get the forks. She sat herself carefully back down and Kratos doesn't have to say anything for Noishe to curl himself around her, head resting just by her right thigh and his tail constantly brushing her left.

Kratos knows that Yggdrasill will be looking for him and Yuan both to see if they had any information on the breakout, but Kratos also knew that he couldn't just leave Anna on her own. Unlike the twins and Cheri, who had only been at the ranch a few days or weeks, Anna was clearly malnourished and the Exsphere on her left hand was a dead giveaway.

Heaven's above…the other prisoners…he and Yuan had forgotten about the Exspheres. If they tried to remove them…

Kratos couldn't ignore that. He'd been planning to lie low with Anna for a few days until she got her feet under her and they had a decent lead on the Desians, but now he absolutely needed to go to Cruxis. Immediately. Because that was where Yuan was and Yuan was the one who was in a position to do something about those escapees.

Anna is dozing when Kratos returns, arms full of firewood. She's leaning on Noishe's shoulder and on a steady path to true sleep. She was shivering a little and Kratos knows that it would have been worse had Noishe not been lending her his warmth.

It's only after he get s a fire going that he looks over to Noishe (Anna being safely sleeping by then) and murmurs, "Well, this is quite the predicament, isn't it?"

-/-/-/

He can feel the half-elves' eyes on him. He can't blame them. After all, Yuan hasn't been this worked up in a while and it was all Kratos' fault because he'd had to get cocky this _one_ time and jinxed it, making the whole operation get compromised.

"You should calm down." Someone tells him.

Yuan wants to snarl at them because, while he had complete faith in his best friend's abilities, he was also completely aware of just how much Kratos couldn't leave well-enough alone and he'd probably end up getting himself killed because of it.

But he doesn't snarl. Doesn't snap.

"Thank you, Makar. How's the progress going?" Yuan needs to get his mind off of the ranch situation and his second-in-command had a very noticeable presence.

White blonde hair was mussed from being inside a turban most of the day and his eyes were a very pale green, all a sharp contrast to darkly tanned skin. He was taller than Yuan by almost a head. He'd been a traveling sheepherder, originally from Triet, before Yuan found him.

"We've finished the beams for the ceiling, sir. The slabs were being put to dry tonight and we can most likely finish it by tomorrow." Makar said, voice still holding a trace of an accent.

"That's good news. Everyone sleeps inside the building tonight. No going outside of it except for extreme emergencies. Is that clear?" Yuan couldn't take the chance that the Desians might glance one of the half-elves going for supplies or a midnight stroll. The invisibility spell (if they ever got it functioning) would only cover the building and a few yards outside of it.

"Yessir."  
Yuan glanced up at the sky. The moon wasn't quite at the center of the sky yet. He would give it another hour. If he hadn't heard from Kratos yet, then he'd go to Cruxis and explain them both out of suspicion.

-/-/-/

There was something cold and wet nudging at her cheek and Anna instinctively rolled away from it into something warm and furry. Memories_ (nightmares)_ flooded her mind and she sat bolt upright, glancing around wildly.

"Good morning." Kratos greeted, stirring some oatmeal in a small pot. It was a sight that Anna had already become accustomed to, despite having woken up to it only three times. When Anna doesn't reply, Kratos glances over at her. "Something wrong?"

"Bad dreams." Anna tells him, standing stiffly from where she had slept, as she had the past three nights, beside Noishe. "Do we have a plan to reach a town anytime soon?"

"We should be able to reach Hima by this afternoon." Kratos told her, ladling her a bowl of oatmeal. It was bland and Kratos knew that it didn't taste very good, but he'd never been the best of cooks. Not with anything other than meat.

"Awesome. I can't wait to have a real bath." Anna would have bathed in the stream, but it was still too cold. As it was, she'd just scrubbed her face and arms as clean of grit and dirt as she'd been able to get them.

Mealtimes between them were often a slightly awkward affair. However they tried to fill the silence, there was always the elephant in the back of the room that was the knowledge of the ranch, of the Desians still chasing after them.

Kratos motions her over and he doesn't have to ask her to lift her shirt anymore so he can get to her injuries. Anna still didn't entirely trust him, but she had nothing to blame him for. Kratos had touched her no more than necessary and always kept his eyes politely diverted.

As he inspected the wounds, he nodded to himself.

"What's up?" Anna asks.

"They're no longer infected and have closed up sufficiently so that there is no chance for infection anymore."

"That's great, I suppose." Anna's understanding of medicine was as basic as it got. If you were bleeding or something was bent in a way that it didn't look like it should be bent, something was wrong. You cleaned it out with water and put a bandage on it. That was all she knew.

Anna jumps when he lays a hand flat against her side (_his palms are rough and calloused and they scrape against the wounds uncomfortably)._ He murmurs something, something she doesn't catch and there's a pale green light surrounding his hand and seeping into her skin. Even as she watches, the bruises and broken skin heal over, leaving healthy, new skin in its place.

Anna stares at him as he pulls his hand back, carefully rewrapping her back. "How did you do that?"

"Magic."

"I thought only those of elven blood could use magic or did I just fall asleep on my schoolbooks one too many times?"

"You're not wrong." Kratos paused, trying to come up with a lie. He'd never told anyone since Mithos and Martel exactly how he'd gotten the small traces of elven blood in his system. "My great-great grandmother, on my mother's side, was elven."

"Who taught you? The magic, I mean."

"The same man who taught me to fight." Though granted, Yuan hadn't been a man yet. Kratos rocked back on his heels before standing, offering her a hand up. Anna doesn't accept the hand up, as he'd known she wouldn't. A very independent woman, was Anna. "We must get going."

When they traveled, there was a sort of hurried peace to it. Anna had ridden Noishe the day after their flight from the ranch, but that was only to give the horse, Rosamund as Anna had dubbed her, a break. She hadn't ridden the 'dog' (Anna refused to believe that that was what it truly was) since. Most of the time, Noishe was at his master's side, his shoulder even with Kratos' elbow. Sometimes, Anna thinks she catches Kratos talking with Noishe when he scratches absentmindedly behind Noishe's ears.

They're like a piece of an entirely different puzzle, Noishe and Kratos. Anna woke up in the night once to find them standing just on the edge of the firelight_ (They were never too far away)_. The firelight had cast exotic and eerie shadows across their faces, had highlighted the part of their bodies facing the fire in warm golds, where the darkness of the night seemed to welcome the rest of them with slender, bewitching arms.

It had made Kratos not look entirely human.

-/-/-/

Yuan was staring at him.

"Is something the matter?" Kratos asked as he closed the door behind him.

The next instant, his head was whipped to the side as a fist cracked across his face. Flexing his jaw to assure himself that nothing was broken, Kratos looked at Yuan, trying to keep down the instinctive flare of temper that came with being punched. "You'd better have a good reason for that."

"That was for making me worried out of my mind and for making me come up with a convincing lie for Yggdrasill on the spot." Yuan hissed.

"…Guess I deserved that then." After all, it wasn't as though Yuan went around punching him in the face every day. "What's the story then?"

"You were in Heimdall, checking on the elves seeing as how the rest of us aren't exactly welcome there. I was in Meltokio, getting news about the laws that the Pope's been trying to instate."

"Not bad."

"I thought the same thing. Now, how about you tell me where the hell you've been the past four days?" Yuan crossed his arms, leaning back in his favorite armchair. "Did you drop off the woman? I hope so, since you flew over here."

Kratos sometimes thought that Yuan knew him too well. Yuan had taken to staying in their small Palmacosta apartment for the past few nights, knowing that if Kratos had sent any news, it would be there.

"She's in Hima right now. Noishe is watching her."

Yuan's eyes darkened a little at the implication of those words. "So you plan on going back then."

"Only until I get her to a town where she can make her own life. I was thinking Izlood."

Yuan shook his head. "No, there are already enough escapees there. When the Desians don't find them at any of the bigger towns, they'll check Izlood and it's not a big enough community to keep her hidden as well as them."

"From Izlood, we could double back. Come back here, to Palmacosta. The Desians don't have a sea branch. They won't check any boats already at sea and once we get here, it's too busy. It would be easy to sneak past them."

Yuan sighed. The plan was a good one, and Kratos knew it. "You're getting awful involved with this one."

"It needs to be done. I thought of something while I was out there too."

"Oh really?"

"Yes, really. The Exspheres on the prisoners' hands…they need Key Crests."

Yuan paled. How had they both missed that? "You're right...but the dwarves that are actually capable of making the Key Crests are all under Yggdrasill."

"Get word to the escapees then. Tell them that, under no circumstances, are they to remove those Exspheres."

"This is why we need to get the magitechnology at the base up and running." Yuan said, already on his feet and grabbing his cape from where it was tossed on the counter. "I could send them the information from here and they'd already be working on it."

Kratos reluctantly got to his feet as well. He always hated to get up from that armchair…"Is the structure finished?"

"The outside of it, yes. We're working on putting up walls and some windows. My second-in-command, Makar, is designing traps for intruders."

He'd met Makar once or twice. The man was a good strategist, if the game of chess he'd been playing against one of the others had been anything to go by. "Your base is going to be a fortress."

"That's the plan."

"Remember to give your people a way through the base without having to get through the traps." Kratos reminded him as they both stepped out the door. The constant sea breeze in Palmacosta was something that they'd both appreciated from the first day they'd ever seen any city on the coast.

"Good call. I'd hate to have to do backflips and who knows what else just to get through the front door."

The people of Palmacosta glance at them, but there are so many people that come through the city that they don't question the odd clothing or the accents that still tug at their consonants_ (Their accents don't exist anymore, not anywhere.)_

"Knowing Makar, he'd make you do them too." Kratos' first impression of the half-elf was that he had a bit of a prankster in him.

Yuan's smile was ironic and a little bitter, but his voice still held that amusement that it had had when they were children wrestling in the snow. "And being the old man that I am, I don't think my body can contort itself into whatever acrobatics Makar can think of."

"It would provide entertainment for the underlings, at least."

They turned into a small alleyway just outside of the guardhouse.

"Look, Kratos, I don't have any moral high ground to stand on at this particular point, but I think that this hero complex that's apparently coming back to you isn't good for you."

"And why's that?" Kratos knew that he had to at least hear his best friend out.

"Because this could all end up being one mistake that will snowball into something monumental."

Kratos reads the look in the familiar bottle green eyes. "…This isn't the same as it was for you with Martel." He says quietly. "I'm not attracted to this woman."

Yuan would be the first to admit that he'd been attracted to Martel the moment he'd seen her, but Kratos…Kratos had never been like that. Kratos had been with women, naturally, and he and Yuan had been together for a little bit, not that they could remember exactly when or even how long_ (Because the days all blend together when you're, for all intents and purposes, immortal)_.

"So you're not attracted to her. Fine. But I stand by what I said. This isn't good for you." Yuan couldn't explain why he thought that, only that this whole thing didn't feel quite right.

"As much as I appreciate your advice, I'm not taking it."

"I had a feeling you wouldn't.

-/-/-/

Kratos enters the room without thinking or knocking. The result? Having to quickly avert his eyes so that he was looking anywhere but at the naked young woman standing in front of a free-standing mirror.

He can hear the slight shift in the air as she jumped, can feel the vibrations in the floor as she hurries to cover herself with a blanket from the bed.

"Where were you?" It isn't the question he'd expected her to ask. "It's a small town and I didn't see you anywhere."  
"I was meeting my friend." Kratos chances a swift glance up, grateful to find that Anna was seated on the bed, blanket covering all that needed to be covered.

She'd bathed while he was gone, Kratos noted. There was no dirt in her rather pale skin _(Eight years with minimal sunlight tended to do that to a person_) and her brown hair was still tangled, but now proved to be a chestnut color rather than the muddy, almost black it used to appear.

"Mr. Ponytail?"

"Mm."

Anna looked like she was about to ask more, but decided better of it, eyes going once again to the mirror.

"You seem troubled." Kratos said a little cautiously. Anna had already proved to be unpredictable, fiery and opinionated and he'd learned long ago to tread carefully around such women.

Anna doesn't look directly at him. "Y'know, I haven't seen a mirror in eight years…I guess I just didn't know that I would change that much." A slight snort. "Goddess, I don't even think I know how old I am anymore."

He doesn't know how to answer to that and goes with his preferred method of avoiding such things—staying silent.

"Y'know what else I learned today?"

"…The date?" Kratos ventured.

Anna chuckled a little, moving to stand and making Kratos look away once more, eyes focused intently on the ground at his feet. "Besides that."

Noishe was howling outside and Kratos answered a little distractedly. "Nothing else comes to mind."

"The old woman who helps her husband run this place…she gave me these clothes and I didn't know what to say" Her voice is a little farther away and there is a rustling of cloth. "I think I forgot how to interact with people."

"I doubt that. You seem to have no trouble talking to me."

"Let me rephrase. I forgot how to interact with _normal _people."

"Thanks so kindly." Kratos muttered.

Anna laughed this time, a full-throated, honest laugh. "You are a lot of things, Kratos, but normal could never be described as one of them."

And it was entirely true. Anna knew next to nothing about the man who had saved her life other than his name, but she knew that there was something about him that just didn't fit with the rest of the world. Like a puzzle piece that had wandered into the wrong box.

But now that she's remembering his ways of speaking and the way he treats her, Anna wants to describe it more as he'd been the piece of the puzzle that had been forgotten to get thrown out before the new puzzle came in.

"…We won't be able to stay here, will we?"

Kratos finally moves across the room from where he'd been standing since he'd entered to the small window. Noishe was still howling and he trusted the protozoan's instincts as much as he did his own. Noishe was prowling back and forth, all subtle danger and liquid muscle, but Kratos could see no sign of any danger.

"No."

"So is this what my life is going to be from now on? Constant running?"

He looks over at her. She's dressed now with her hands propped on her hips. The pale green dress that looks a little outdated for this time, but it suits her quite well. The long sleeves are a tad short at the wrist, like the skirt is at the ankle, but it still fits her well enough. The torso is a darker shade of green. Anna is fiddling with the neckline, tugging it up and the shoulders down, but she looks like a normal person of society once more.

"There is a plan."

"That so?"

"We go to Izlood and then take a boat from there to Palmacosta."

"Isn't there a ranch near Palmacosta too? I heard the guards talking about it sometimes. It would put us right back in the same situation."  
"No, it wouldn't. Palmacosta is considerably bigger than most of the other cities. It makes it more difficult for the Desians to keep control and to find people. It will be much safer for you there."

"I…I can't ever see my family again, can I?"

Kratos hadn't been particularly fond of his parents and he'd never had any siblings. He can't say he misses them. "Not for a while."

"We leave in the morning, I take it?"

"Before dawn."

Anna was staring at him as though he was insane. "Does the concept of sleep mean anything at all to you?"

"You can sleep in the saddle if needed. We can't stay here very long and Izlood is but a two day's ride away."

"You sound like you've been to all these places. Izlood, Palmacosta…Have you? Been there I mean?"

"I lived in Palmacosta for a time and Izlood has the only other port in Sylvarant, so I've had to pass through it often."

"…What is it that you do?" Anna asked. "As a job. You can't live off of begging and being a wanderer."

"I'm a mercenary." It wouldn't be the first time he used the lie. It was a simple one that explained everything.

Anna tilted her head as she looked him over. "A mercenary doesn't quite suit you."

Kratos blinked in surprise. "Excuse me?"

"A mercenary. It doesn't suit you. You look more like the kind of guy who prefers to stay—what's the word I'm looking for?—grounded, I guess, grounded in one place."

Kratos didn't quite know what to do with that observation. Another one of Noishe's howls broke the air and this time, they both stuck their heads out the window to see what was the matter.

"Goddess, but don't these Desians ever give up?" Anna muttered as she ran to stuff her feet into a pair of fuzzy socks and some fairly clumpy brown boots.

"Apparently not." They were both heading towards the door when they heard the sound of booted footsteps and shouting. "Out the window, go."

Anna doesn't think twice, vaulting herself over and it's only once she's out the window that Kratos remembers that her body's still fragile and healing from the ranch. He should have gone first, to catch her. But it's too late for such thoughts and he launches himself outside, landing lightly on the balls of his feet.

When he looks over, Anna is half-sprawled on Noishe's back and Kratos realizes that of course Noishe would have caught her. He was starting to recognize Anna's scent and had taken a liking to her from almost the moment they'd met.

"Are we just leaving Rosamund?" Anna asks, already righting herself on Noishe so that she's sitting just behind his shoulder blades.

"No time to saddle him up." Kratos climbs atop Noishe behind her. Normally, he would have refrained from doing so. Not because Noishe couldn't handle the weight—the dog was extraordinarily strong—but because he didn't like to put the burden on his old friend. "Let's go, Noishe."


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note:** Been obsessed with Guys and Dolls lately. Watched West Side Story and loved the Officer Krupske song. Going to the Bahamas this week and when we get back, then I'm going straight to Game Stop so I can pick up my reserved Arc Rise Fantasia game. Can't wait!

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/

_A good friend is a connection to life - a tie to the past, a road to the future, the key to sanity in a totally insane world. ~Lois Wyse_

-/-/

"Why'd ya to need passage all the way ter Palmacosta?" The sailor asked, unknotting a net. "Got family there?"

Anna and Kratos glanced at each other. Kratos, being the one more well-versed in lies, was the one who started it. For years afterward, Anna would remind him of that fact.

"Yes, we do." He said. "We've only just been able to scrounge the money to go and her mother is very sick."

"So yer not related?"

Kratos fought the urge to stiffen when Anna's arm wrapped around his waist. She smiled and tried to tug him a little closer, failing. "No, Goddess no…we're engaged. Isn't that right…honey?"

The sailor looked them over. They certainly didn't look like they were in love, but then, these days, marriages weren't about love as much as they used to be.

Kratos barely managed to force a slight smile, putting an arm around her small shoulders._ (Still so small…it would take a while before the effects of the malnourishment went away entirely)_ "Yes, we were going to get married in Palmacosta. It's just so hard out here, for a couple just starting out. We…we were hoping that there would be more opportunities there."

"Either of you sailors by trade?"

They shook their heads.

"What kinda work you plannin' on doin' then?"

Anna felt the frustrated growl vibrate through Kratos' chest, but couldn't hear it. She kept on the plastered smile. "My parents are teachers in the Academy. We hoped that they might have job openings for us, even if it's only in their cafeteria."

The sailor took a deep breath, looked them over one more time and finally said, "Next boat ter Palmacosta leaves this afternoon."

It's only once the sailor has gone back to his net and they're out of earshot that they both drop their arms and Kratos mutters, "Engaged?"

"Did you have a better lie?" Anna counters.

He didn't, but he wasn't about to let her know that.

-/-/-/

Makar nudges the person's leg with the toe of his boot. "Sir?"

It takes them a moment to shimmy their way out from beneath the complicated machinery. Makar almost doesn't recognize his leader. The normally neat hair is disheveled and streaked with oil, grease smeared across his cheeks. The white tank top is wrinkled and nearly black.

Yuan blinks up at him. "What is it?"

"Doria wanted to know if you were plannin' on having lunch sometime today."

"Heaven's above, is it lunchtime already?" Yuan stands with the cracking of joints. Magitechnology wasn't studied in Sylvarant, so it fell on Yuan to set up most of it, though Botta had been proving fair useful in figuring out the wires and the plugs. Yuan had made a mental note to teach his people how to use magitechnology once it was all up and working.

Yuan wants to believe that the half-elves' lack of knowledge about magitechnology has nothing to do with the blood running through their veins, but he's lived long enough to know better. It was one of the oldest tricks in the humans' book, another way of separating the social castes. Four thousand years ago, half-elves had been oppressed by lack of an education and slavery. Things hadn't changed, though times were too bad for people to afford slaves.

"Lunchtime was two hours ago." Makar tells him as they begin walking down the hallways. The rooms towards the far back of the base are all for the inhabitants and everyone had already begun picking out their rooms. "Doria thought that someone should inform you of that fact before the leftovers are used for dinner."

"That woman is a saint."

They're stopped just outside of the kitchen by a warning glare. "You are not walking into my kitchen all dirtied up like you are."

Yuan smiles at the woman. She's a little chubby, but the mousy brown hair is pulled back into a severe bun and an otherwise kind face is frowning at him. Floury hands are on her hips and the apron is dirty.

"Lovely to see you too, Doria." He carefully maneuvers around her so that he can get to the sink. He has to scrub hard at his skin for the grease to come out entirely.

"So glad that you finally decided to crawl out from whatever piece of machinery you were hiding under." Doria tells him as she sets down a bowl of rabbit stew on the counter. There was no actual dining room. Everyone always ate in the kitchen, even if space could be a tad cramped.

Yuan brushes a stray strand of blue hair from his face as he leans against the counter. "Unfortunately, it won't be the last of the machinery. There's still loads to do." The doors open again to show Botta, also grease-streaked and filthy. "You look like you got in a fight with the machines rather than set them up. And from where I'm standing, the machines won."

Botta glares a little, but all of the underlings had learned that Yuan made his sarcastic comments the same way that most people liked to breathe; often and without thinking.

Yuan spoons a mouthful of the rabbit stew into his mouth—Doria was truly a fantastic cook—and swallows it, eyes wanting to water at the heat, before asking, "Any news on Kratos?"

"No sir. Though the shipping logs in Palmacosta record that a ship from Izlood is set to arrive late tonight. There's not another one for another week."

"That's some good news, I suppose. The Desians certainly haven't caught them yet. If they had, the word would have been out already."

"What do you plan to do, sir?" Makar asked, munching on a crust of bread.

"I'll meet them at Palmacosta and see what we can do from there." Yuan sighed. That meant he was going to miss dinner and he always regretted missing one of Doria's meals. It certainly helped him remember why exactly he still ate, even though he didn't need to anymore. "I'll head out once I'm done here. It'll take me a while to get to Palmacosta."

"All this machinery…where are you getting it? And the materials?" Botta asks from his place across Yuan. "It's not like you can find them just lying around."

"Believe me, I've been at this much longer than you can imagine. I've got my sources and I learned how to build about half this stuff by hand anyway."

_(It was during his first months in the war. He'd been chosen for his affinity for lightning magic and, according to the technology whiz at the military base, he'd been a natural for the job.)_

-/-/-/

Kratos supposes he shouldn't be surprised to find Yuan comfortably slouched in his armchair, surrounded by papers. The half-elf looks much browner than Kratos remembers, but then, he'd been spending his days out in the Triet sun. Noishe padded towards the other seraphim, licking his cheek.

Yuan started at the very warm tongue, but relaxed when he recognized just who was beside him. "By the stars, Noishe. Give a man a heart attack, why don't you?"

"What're all these papers for?" Kratos asks, closing the door to the pouring rain. "Not more research into the invisibility spell?"

Yuan looks up, smiles. Both Kratos and Anna were entirely drenched, their hair plastered to their faces. "So…how was the trip?"

They both glare at him and Kratos goes to the small linen closet and grabs three towels, tossing one to Anna. "You didn't answer the question."

Yuan stands, taking the second towel from his best friend's hands and kneeling beside Noishe, rubbing the towel furiously over the protozoan's fur. "No, no. I've nearly got that figured out. This is all the records of…" He glances at Anna, who's toweling her hair dry, before finishing. "…Of the dwarves in Sylvarant. If we can get in touch with one of them, maybe they'll be able to make Key Crests for the escapees."

"What are the Key Crests for?" Anna asks.

Yuan nods at her left hand, or more specifically, the sphere on the back of it. "That is called an Exsphere. It's what the ranches produce. They basically bring the body to its fullest potential, but unless you have a Key Crest, the mana in your body go haywire. If you attempt to remove it, your body's mana can't adjust to the sudden change and, trying to make up for the loss, it turns you into a monster."

Anna's already pale skin grew paler before flushing with anger as she whirled on Kratos. "And you didn't think to tell me?"

"You didn't really need to know." It was a feeble reason and Kratos honestly couldn't answer as to why he hadn't told her. He didn't know himself.

"Don't listen to him." Yuan tells her. "He's a natural liar. He was doing it to protect you."

Anna crossed her arms across her stomach. "Is that so?"

Yuan could tell from the look on her face that she didn't believe him, but he always prided himself on always sticking with his lies. And, after all, Kratos had lied for him for much higher stakes before. It was the least Yuan could do. "So it is. He does it without thinking."

Anna looks back at Kratos, who only lifts his shoulders in a graceful shrug as he sits in the armchair beside Yuan.

"…Any luck on the dwarf issue?" Kratos asks Yuan.

"That would be willing to help? None. Most of the dwarves left are all underground and are content to stay that way."

"I didn't think dwarves still existed." Anna says, drawing the damp towel around her. It was rather cold in here.

"They don't." Not to the public anyway. Yuan looks back up at her and grimaces. "You're cold, aren't you? Sorry about that. We don't have any clothes that'll fit you, obviously, but you can borrow some of ours until you can go to the market tomorrow and get some proper clothes."

Anna follows Yuan into a small room. The bed is neatly made and doesn't look like it's been slept in for a while. The pale green curtains are drawn over the window.

"…He's a friend of yours? Kratos."

Yuan glances over his shoulder at her as he grabs some if his shirts. Anything he finds will be too big on her _(She's small and malnourished, but there's no disguising the steel in her spine and the fiery personality)_ so he tries to get something that at least won't swamp her.

"Mm. My best friend, actually."

"Really?"

Yuan smiled a little as he mentally measures her. She doesn't have particularly long legs and they were of similar heights, so he finds an old pair of his sweatpants. "Is that so difficult to believe?"

"Kratos…doesn't strike me as the type who makes very many friends."

"Heh. No, he never has been. But," Yuan hands her the clothes. "I am quite proud to say he's a good friend of mine."

"How long have you known him?" Anna is holding up the clothes to herself.

"A _long_ time. Since we were kids."

"So you knew him before he was a mercenary?"

Yuan wasn't surprised that that was the story that Kratos had chosen. "Yes, I did."

"I can't…really imagine him as a kid."

"Sometimes it's hard for me to too. In any case, I'll leave you to change." Yuan had nearly closed the door before he popped his head back in. "Oh, and you're welcome to use the brush on the bedside table. You appear to desperately need it."

He can hear her muttered curses through the door and grins as he plops down in his chair. "Interesting girl."

Kratos doesn't look up from the papers in his hands. "So glad you think so."

"I take it you heard that conversation?"

"It was rather hard to miss. So Yggdrasill still has most of the dwarves on his payroll?"

"Yeah. And the ones who aren't are so deep into hiding that they won't come out for something like this."

"We could bribe one." Kratos suggested. "Not all of the dwarves are happy with what Yggdrasill's been doing. They're only working with him to avoid being killed."

Yuan shook his head. "I don't think that's a good plan. The information could leak and then we'd both be as good as dead. We could kill a few Desians, steal their Key Crests."

"We'd have to explain their deaths."

Yuan leaned back, smirking. "They'd die of natural causes, of course."

"As skilled as we both are with poisons, we'd still have to get to the bodies. You know that the ranches burn their dead and take any valuables on their person."

Anna stepped out, arms full of the wet clothes. "I wasn't sure where you wanted me to leave them."

"I'd say let them dry on the balcony, but…" Yuan looked out the window, where it was still pouring. "In the sink, I suppose"

Both males watch Anna walk to the small kitchen. The sweatpants are long enough that they fall past her feet and the shirt's sleeves—which fall about halfway down Yuan's upper arm—go past her elbow. Her chestnut hair, now combed, proves to be gently wavy.

Yuan catches the look on Kratos' face and leans in to whisper, "You _liiike_ her."

Kratos' hand snaps out to cuff his best friend over the head. "You're both wrong and juvenile."

"But remember that you love me anyway. Which reminds me," Yuan's on his feet and tugging Kratos so that he stands as well. "You've got to try this fantastic stew."

"Tell me you weren't the one that made it." Kratos says.

"No and my cooking isn't nearly that bad. Doria made it." Yuan's ladling two bowls of the stew and hands the bowls to Kratos. "Heat those up, won't you?"

Kratos murmurs a word and feels the familiar rush of mana that magic brings and the bowls are steaming the next instant. Where Yuan's magical skills are more powerful, Kratos has a finer control of it. He hands one of the bowls to Anna and leans back against the counter.

"I'm surprised Doria has the patience to deal with you." Kratos says as he tentatively tastes the stew. He finds it delicious.

"You have the patience don't you? And heaven knows you're no saint, so I see no reason as to why she shouldn't have it as well."

"I only have that kind of patience from years of dealing with you." Kratos shot back.

Anna chuckles into her stew. Around Yuan, Kratos was a much warmer man. It's like they dulled each other's sharp edges, made each other more approachable and much more human.

Noishe sits back on his haunches and whines. Kratos sighs, takes another few spoonfuls of stew and sets the bowl down. Noishe dashes over and is lapping it up the next moment.

"I blame you." Kratos tells Yuan.

Yuan blinks in surprise. "_Me?_"

"You." Kratos confirmed. "You're the one who taught him to beg for his food like that. Noishe is perfectly capable of hunting for it on his own."

"I, sir, am far too dignified to do such a lowly thing as beg."

Kratos arches his eyebrows. "Of course you are."

They eat in silence for long minutes. Anna watches the men interact. They're an interesting pair, Yuan and Kratos. They speak to each other like brothers, their occasional touches are that of best friends and Anna can't quite describe how they look at each other sometimes.

Anna thinks about this small apartment. It's just large enough for two people. It's a little sparse, having little more than the necessities, but it's the things that are slightly more than necessary that make it much more homey.

The armchairs in the living room are well-worn. The couch is just long enough to lie on and the cushions are well-squashed. There's a thin blanket over the back of the couch. It's a deep violet trimmed in pale green.

There is a painting on the wall in the center of the hallway. It's small, but it's lovely. The colors are subtle. The painting is of an ancient tree, its trunk thick and twisting; its branches long and leaves richly green and tinted gold in full sunlight. It looks likes something out of a dream.

From Anna's understanding of the situation, this was the place where she'd be living for a while. It didn't have the same feel as the home she remembered back in Luin. There was something missing in all of this, but out of all places to start a new life, this wasn't so bad.

-/-/-/-

It's an odd routine that they fall into. Yuan is often gone when Anna wakes and comes back after the sun sinks over the horizon. As much as she tries to figure out where he goes, she can't. Yuan is companionable when he's there. He's an odd mixture of sarcasm and charm and he's more open with his answers to her questions than Kratos.

It's Kratos who Anna spends some of her days with. Outside of the apartment, they have to keep up the charade of being engaged. They're stiff with each other at first, but Anna learns little things about Kratos from the game of pretend.

When they have to hold hands, she's learned to only hold his left one. He needs the right hand to draw the ever-present sword at his side, just in case. He's a quiet man, but when she asks for his opinion on things, he replies honestly. His favorite fruits are oranges and pineapples, all of which are usually in abundance here in Palmcosta, what with the amount of trade going in and out of the city. And he hates tomatoes.

Kratos doesn't disappear half as often as Yuan, but on the days he does, Anna's usually on her own. She wears a bandage over her left hand most of the time. If anyone asks, she cut herself making dinner. Anna walks the streets of Palmacosta, takes in what she sees. Desian patrols are constant, but they don't pay her as much mind. After all, no prisoner was supposed to be able to make it all the way to Palmacosta from the Luin area.

Anna comes home one night, groceries in hand, to find both men in the living room. Kratos is pouring over papers and files, sitting in his armchair. Yuan is stretched out on the couch, forearm over his eyes.

"Something wrong?" She asks, setting the groceries on the counter. Anna has slowly become more acclimated to their moods.

Two pairs of eyes, one a dark blue-green and the other red-tinted, look over at her. "Not terribly."

"You're lying." She tells them as she begins to stack the fruits in a bowl.

Yuan and Kratos' eyes meet. "She knows us too well." Yuan's lips hardly move as he speaks, but he knows that Kratos hears him.

Kratos has to agree. They're getting in too deep with this. So far, they'd managed to keep Anna from knowing about their angelic forms, but there was only so long they could keep up the act. Anna was a perceptive woman. It was only a matter of time until she guessed something close enough to the truth.

-/-/-/-

"Honey, I'm home." Yuan calls quietly as he unclasps his cloak, letting it drop on his armchair before he sinks into it.

There's no reply and Yuan is immediately on his feet. The flight from Triet took a while, what with mountains and the constant sea storms. By the time he got here, one of the others was home.

He searched the kitchen for a note—even Anna's handwriting had become familiar by this point. He doesn't find one.

The door clicks as it closes and Yuan looks over. He's probably more relieved than he should be to see Kratos standing there with a few envelopes. "Had to get the mail." Kratos says as an explanation.

"Did you see Anna before you left?" Yuan asks.

Kratos shakes his head. "I'd assumed she was still out. She had mentioned that she wanted to check out the lighthouse and then see if the school had any openings."

"She wants to be a teacher?"

"Not for the older kids."

"Why did she want to go to the lighthouse?"

"It's supposed to be haunted." Kratos reminds him.

They both knew that there were no ghosts in the lighthouse. Some monsters—tame, mostly—had made their home there a few centuries back. Seeing as how they didn't really bother the townspeople, neither Kratos nor Yuan had found any reason to get them out.

"Anna's not here?" Kratos assumed.

"No. And no note."

"Split up." Kratos said immediately. "I'll take the school. Meet in the square in twenty minutes."

Twenty minutes later, Yuan is jogging to Kratos, shaking his head. "I managed to catch a few of the stall-owners before they closed shop. They all agreed on the fact that a woman of Anna's description came through the market today. She chatted a bit, asked a bit about the lighthouse, went down to see it and came back. They haven't seen her since a little after noon."

"No sign of her at the school." Kratos sighed, eyes darting around. Yuan recognized the action. He was searching for danger, for clues, for anything.

"Oh hell. She got snatched by the Desians."

"Most likely."

"I'll head back to the base, check the records and any alerts through the Desians' system and I'll talk to Forcystus." Seeing the look on Kratos' face, Yuan ran a hand through his bangs. "He trusts me."

"Only to a certain extent and I doubt that it extends as far as telling you sensitive information."

"Then I'll make it an order. You're forgetting that we have some pull on this matter, Kratos. And we can't let her go back to the ranch again."

"Think, Yuan! If that order gets back to Yggdrasill, then your entire operation is gone." Kratos thought for a moment, hand automatically resting on his sword. "…Alright. You go back to the base, find out where she's at. When you do, get the information to me via telecommunicator. I'm heading back to Derris-Kharlan. I might be able to find out something about all this."

-/-/-/-

Yuan strode through the front hall of the base, not even considering going through the other entrances. Makar looked up from where he was standing guard.

"Something wrong sir?"

"Pull up all of the information we have on Desian movement." Yuan ordered. Makar frowned. Yuan didn't often pull his position as leader. In fact, Makar couldn't remember the last time that it had happened. "I needed it yesterday."

Makar follows him, long legs having difficulty keeping stride with Yuan. "Did something happen?"

"One the escapees got snatched. We need to find out where the Desians took her."

"One of the ones from the Asgard ranch?"

"Yes."

"Activate them."

Yuan froze as lasers dashed in front of him, not inches from his face. He whirled to look at Makar, whose form was broken up by a wall of the lasers. The hallway was clear of the red lines behind Makar. The Triet native held up a small mechanical something.

"Communicative earpiece." Makar said. "I knew there was something fishy about you. How else could you have gone from here to Palmacosta in the timeframe of a few hours every day? You're one of _them_, aren't you?"

Yuan sighed. "Makar, we don't have time for this. The escapee could be in terrible danger."

"You don't want to help them. Why would you? They're the ones that got you to the lofty position you're in. This is all just a ruse so that you can set us up, get more people to get stuffed in those hellholes. You're a traitor to your own race!"

"How am I a traitor?"

"Do you think we're stupid? We've heard the Desians talking about a 'Lord Yuan' and a 'Lord Kratos' coming to inspect the ranches every now and then. It wasn't hard to put it together."

"And you believe that that makes me a traitor?"  
"Yes."

Yuan couldn't deny that he was a traitor, but not to his people. Never to his people. "So you're keeping me stuck here, is that it?"

"Only until I get all the information I need out of you as to how Cruxis works. And then I'm going to kill you."  
"Well that's not much incentive for me to tell you anything, now is it?" Yuan was well-versed in the art of torture, having had to do it himself enough times in the past. He knew how to keep his mouth shut.

"Everyone gives in eventually." Makar said, stuffing his hands in his pockets and walking away casually.

_People only give in when they have something that can be exploited._ Yuan thought, glancing around as he looked for a way out. Knowing the base's defenses as he did, he knew that he couldn't simply send a shock through the walls to disable the lasers. They were insulated to make sure that the wires that kept the magitechnology running didn't accidently burn the whole place down around them.

Yuan was wondering why the hell they'd done such a good job with the security.

"…Sir?"

He whirled around. "Botta."

"Sir, you wanna explain why you're the reason our security system activated?"

"Would you believe that it's complicated?"

"Knowing you, sir, absolutely." Botta studied him. "…Do you have a way out?"

"In about twenty seconds, I might. But it'll probably destroy half the hallway. Can you shut down the security system?"

Botta shook his head. "No. Makar's got it on a fingerprint identification…Is Makar a traitor?"

Yuan looked at him. "What do you think?"

"He tried to get a lot of us in on this uprising of his. He said that he didn't trust you or your sources."

"That doesn't answer my question." Yuan said, trying to keep his impatience down. Despite himself, he'd become fond of Anna over the month that he'd known her and he knew that Kratos had as well. This could all be going directly to hell and damn if Yuan wasn't going with it.

Botta mentally reviewed what he'd learned of their leader. He wasn't an honest man, not really. He liked to scheme, liked the thrill of having secrets. But he did honest work and never asked anything of his people that he wasn't willing to do himself. He'd taken a stand to an organization that had stood for thousands of years, had risked his life for people he'd never met.

"I think he's the traitor. What's your plan for getting out of here?"

"Let me worry about that. I need you to get any information we have on recent Desian movements. We're looking for a newly recaptured prisoner, A012. There might also be something on an Angelus Project connected to it."

"Yessir." Botta took four steps away before turning back to him. "Sir, after all this clears up, I think we deserve a proper explanation."

Yuan didn't look away from the other half-elf. Kratos had called it, months in advance. He still wasn't totally convinced that, if he'd told them all the truth about what he and Kratos were, that they weren't anything of this earth anymore, nothing even remotely natural, that they would have taken it well. The uprising still might have happened.

But not telling had certainly made it easier to get the suspicion going.

Yuan nodded. "Agreed."

He waited until he couldn't hear Botta's footsteps anymore before he crouches and puts his hands to the floor. Kratos was going to _kill_ him for messing up his foundation, but what else could he do?

Yuan took a deep breath, dipping into his deep reservoir of mana and drawing it inwards before, with a murmured "Indignation." He shoots the mana down his arms and into the floor, releasing it into a brilliant flare of energy.

-/-/-/-

"Kratos."

The man in question tensed at the familiar, velvety voice before turning back to the owner of that voice. "Lord Yggdrasill."

The blonde angel looked at him, the pale pale eyes unreadable. "It's been a while since I've seen you. What urgent matter brings you back out of Heimdall?"

"I got a message that there was some news on the Angelus Project. I thought I should come see for myself."

"I see. At least your information was correct. Do you remember the escaped prisoners of a month ago?"

Kratos pretended to think. "The one's from Kvar's ranch? The ones that caused such an uproar?"

"The very same. It appears that one of them was recaptured. The one that held the most promise for the Angelus Project, in fact. It was found in Palmacosta, oddly enough. Magnius shall have to be punished. The experiment was living in his jurisdiction under his very nose and he wasn't aware of it."

"…How did they find it then?"

"Kvar put together a team of guards who'd seen the experiment to search for it. Apparently, they tracked it all the way to the famous port city."

"That was rather fast."

"Not fast enough. A month's worth of research was lost. It's the longest time an experiment's gone free." Yggdrasill was silent for a long minute before he said, "I have an assignment for you."  
Kratos arched an eyebrow in questioning.

"I want you to guard the Angelus Project experiment, since apparently, Kvar's guards are not up to the task."

Kratos nodded. "Where is the experiment being held?"

"It's in transport to the Asgard Ranch as we speak. It'll be in isolation, to try and stop all of these escapes."

"I'll relay the news to Yuan and then be on my way."

-/-/-/-

"You look like hell." Was Kratos' version of a greeting as Yuan's image came on the screen of the telecommunicator.

Yuan glared a little sourly at him. "You'll be pleased. You get to say 'I told you so' and we both know how much you love that."

Kratos frowned for a moment before he realized what his friend was talking about. "There was an uprising."

"Yes. Right now, it's just me and Botta getting the information and cleaning up the mess. I won't be able to help you bust Anna out of the ranch."

"You won't need to. Yggdrasill's assigned me to guard it. It gives me a lot of opportunities to get her out."

"He'll know. Yggdrasill will know it was you. He's not a moron."

"No, he isn't." Kratos agreed.

"She really means that much? You're willing to risk your life for her?"

"Is this really the time for this conversation?" Kratos demanded.

"An answer that neatly sidesteps the question."

Yuan was right, Kratos thought. He enjoyed Anna's company. He liked her attitude, her intelligence, her boldness. The elves had a word for that sort of thing. _Yusher_, it was called. It was fire and steel and a joy-of-living.

"…Who's Kvar's second-in-command?"  
Yuan repeated the question to a person who could only be Botta. There was the shuffling of papers and the typing of keys before Yuan replied, "Renwick. Black hair, brown eyes, native of Izlood. Curved scar on the left cheek, from a fishing accident. Big kind of guy."

"Got it."

Yuan didn't like the look on Kratos' face. "What is it that you're going to do?"  
"Nothing terribly extreme."  
May the heavens be merciful. It wasn't often that Kratos felt a need to exploit the streak that all warriors had for cruelty. Kratos only had a touch of it, but seeing him use that touch of a streak once was all Yuan needed to never want to see it again.

Kratos reached for the button to turn off the telecommunicator before Yuan said, "Oh, and when you do break her out, go straight to Luin. I know it doesn't make much sense now, but stay there until I get there. Don't run."

"Are you seriously going to lie to everyone in Cruxis about this?"

"Not anymore than I already am."

"…I have to ask you the same question, Yuan." When the sapphire-eyed half-elf frowned in confusion, Kratos continued, "Are you really willing to risk your life for Anna?"

"I'll answer that when you do."


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Wanted to thank all of you guys who've been reading my stuff. I really appreciate it, since I wasn't really expecting to be able to do this.

Been learning to drive—God help me—and hopefully I won't totally murder the mailbox (as has been the tradition with my dad, brother and sister before me). I like that mailbox…

As for the slight delay in getting this chapter up, I blame it almost entirely on my inability to keep concentrated on one story for very long. I wrote a new one for Howl's Moving Castle, started on my Firefly/FMA crossover (which is proving much more difficult than I thought) and have also been working on some stuff for my Fictionpress (I'm under fowl68 there too).

I reserved Arc Rise Fantastia, but they gave me the wrong date to go pick it up. Grargh. But I did get Baten Kaitos, a game I've been meaning to play for a while. So far, it's not bad. Still prefer ToS though. : )

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/

_I prefer liberty with danger to peace with slavery. ~Author Unknown_

-/-/

Kratos listened with one ear while Renwick told him about the new security measures (really, how much more could they _do_?) that were being especially enforced on A012. Renwick was an entire head and a half taller than Kratos, but Kratos had never been a tall man and had long ago become accustomed to being the shortest kid on the block.

When Renwick shows him the cell, Kratos' blood burns as he sees the conditions. Yggdrasill had mentioned something about isolation, but this…this was beyond isolation. The cell was a hole in the hill that the ranch had been built on, dark and damp. Bars took up the entryway and Kratos was sure that they were withholding rations from her once more and he knew that she could smell the food being cooked for the Desians from where the cell was.

They'd put her there to forget about her until they needed her for the experiments again.

When Anna sees him, he sees her eyes light up for a brief moment before they darken at the face of Renwick. There were new injuries on her already. Bruises and a few cuts, but there was an angry red burn on the line of her cheekbone.

Renwick leaves him to his guard duty and Kratos waits until he's well out of earshot before he looks back at Anna.

Anna smiles and it's poisonously sweet. "Have I ever told you that all Desians are bastards?"

Kratos snorts a laugh. "Not quite in those words, no."

"Well they are."

Kratos looks her over carefully once more. While the injuries he could see weren't too bad (the burn would certainly scar) there were many more ways of hurting someone. "Are you alright?"

Anna raises her eyebrows at him. "Really? All the questions in the world you can ask and that's the one you pick? Great job on creativity, Kratos."

He rolled his eyes. That was a yes.

-/-/-/-

It had been two days since Kratos had arrived at his new post in the Asgard Ranch. He'd been lying low those days, giving Yuan some time to recover from his mutiny and to get his feet back under him. But he was getting Anna out. Tonight.

-/-/-/-

Renwick paced through his office. He didn't trust that Kratos. He would have said that the man had shifty eyes, but that wasn't it. Everyone knew about Kratos—sorry, _Lord_ Kratos. He was one of Lord Yggdrasill's most trusted angels.

But Renwick knew what Kvar thought about the man. Renwick hadn't wanted to believe Kvar when he said that Kratos was a traitor, that he was the one who'd helped those prisoners escape, but the pieces fit.

The office door clicked as the lock slipped into place. Renwick whirled around, hand raised automatically to use magic, but he froze and stared at Kratos, who was leaning so casually against the door.

"Renwick," Having expected a shout, the half-elf found the calm voice so full of rage terrifying. "If you lock anyone else up in that hole, I will splatter you all over the walls."

"I'll tell Kvar! We'll lock you in there, give you the same treatment as these inferior beings-"

Kratos' smile was cold and brutal. "I can survive quite a lot of pain. Can you?"

"…What do you want?"

"You're going to get those keys for me. Tonight."  
Renwick frowned. "I don't-"

"You put her in that hellhole, Renwick."

"It's just an experiment." Renwick scoffed. "Useless and inferior."

"_She_ is more than an experiment." Kratos snarled. "And now you're going to help me get her out of there."

"If you think I'm going to go against Kvar, you're off your rocker."

"I'll get her out myself if I have to. But if I have to do it, I'll flood the gutters of this ranch with blood before I'm through." It would be necessary because everything Yggdrasill had would be brought down on him and Kratos refused to go down without a damn good fight. "And you will be one of the corpses washed into the sewers. Get me those keys and then you won't have to worry about either of us. Get me those keys before the sun rises."

"I can't! Kvar has the keys. It's part of the new security measures. I won't be able to get them until tomorrow afternoon, when it's time for its experiments."  
He was silent for a long minute. "Listen to me well, Renwick. If I don't have those keys by tomorrow afternoon, you will live just long enough to regret betraying me."

-/-/-/-

Anna was staring up at him as he unlocks the door. _(It strikes Kratos for the first time that he's not that much taller than her. The top of her head reaches his cheek)_. He could have just burst the lock and bars with magic, but magic left traces and each user had their own distinctive flavor, making it easier to track someone who used magic.

"…What's the look for?" She asked quietly. She'd seen a lot of expressions (okay not really, but she'd seen enough) on his face in the month that they'd lived together. The chilling mask that's currently taken over his features is not one that she knows.

"It's nothing."

"Liar." But Anna doesn't press. They're waiting for full dark in the forest. Desian patrols are still making their rounds as twilight settles over the land and neither of them is stupid enough to try to get out of the ranch during daylight.

"Well this is something I didn't think I would ever see, Lord Kratos."

Both Anna and Kratos freeze at the slippery voice. Kratos turns to Kvar. "I've been told that there is a surprise lying in wait with each new dawn." It was an old elven proverb that Martel had always been rather fond of.

"Apparently." Kvar glanced at Anna. "You won't be able to keep it away from me forever you know. I will have it back."

Anna's retort to that was creative, but anatomically impossible.

"Such a vulgar inferior being. I would wonder what you see in these creatures, Lord Kratos, but then, you were one of them once, I suppose."

Anna stiffens beside him. He can hear her whisper. "Lord?"

He doesn't answer her, a hand instinctively sliding to the hilt of his sword. "Am I supposed to care about your opinions on me, Kvar?"

"Opinions have never been a part of this. That you're a traitor to the entire organization, of course, is a fact."

"You've no proof."

"I do, however, have witnesses."

Kratos knew that he couldn't argue Kvar on that point. But he and Anna needed to get out of here and they couldn't outrun the Desians in an outright sprint. Kratos could, but not with Anna, who was still recovering from the effects of malnourishment and muscle atrophy.

He needed to think of something, but he needed _time. (How ironic. He had lived for over four thousand years and hated it, but it was now that he was asking for more time.)_

"And just how long do you think you can keep those witnesses safe from me, I wonder?" Kratos asked, taking a leaf from Yuan's book. Yuan had always excelled in distracting people and making them talk.

Kvar eyed the seraphim. He'd heard the tales of Kratos' prowess in battle, but had never witnessed it. While he had no doubt that the man was a skilled swordsman, the tales he'd heard had most likely been embellished over the years, as was the wont of such stories, and the man, despite having become an angel was still, at the very core of his nature, human. He couldn't use magic, like those of elven blood, giving Kvar's people an advantage.

Anna stared at Kratos. From her angle, she couldn't see his face, mostly only his profile and she doesn't know this man. This man standing partially in front of her _(It's that place that men instinctively know and step towards when a female that they cared about was in danger. It's the first time any man's done it for her.)_ isn't the one she spent her days with. That man, while not friendly, wasn't cold like this.

Anna doesn't remember her mother as well as she would like, but she does remember her saying something about men and women. How men's anger ran hot and strong, that it was the women whose anger was icy. That women were the ones who might forgive, but never forget.

Kratos was proving that old tale wrong because there was nothing even remotely warm in his body language.

"Lord Yggdrasill trusted you, didn't he, Kratos? And he doesn't like traitors." There was no change in Kratos' expression, not that Kvar expected there to be one. "I've heard the rumors of what he does to traitors. But you…I wonder what he would do to you in his fury."

Kratos didn't move. His hand was perfectly steady over the hilt of his sword. "You can't kill me."

"I beg to differ. That Crystal makes you immortal, not invincible."

"Whose word do you think Yggdrasill will take? Yours or mine?"

"You're a traitor. Were we not just discussing this?"

"And so we are back to the original point. All you have are your witnesses and there is nothing to stop me from killing them."

Kvar makes a single motion with his hand and the guards are rushing at Kratos. Kratos' sword darted out, punching through the first guard's solar plexus. As another came at his side, his free hand pushed aside the blade and he swept the guard's feet from under him.

There was a sudden thinning of the mana in the air and Kratos looked to the source where the mana was gathering. One of Kvar's mages, standing behind the front lines, had a spell circle glowing around him. It wasn't a complicated circle, which meant that the spell was basic, but even a basic spell could do quite a bit of damage.

Spinning in a quick, tight circle, Kratos cut at the guards' stomachs, which made them all stumble back and it gave Kratos a moment to summon his own magic from his internal mana. Only amateurs needed to draw mana from the air around them for such small spells. It hardly takes him a moment before the spell is released by the speaking of its name, "Wind Blade."

Even though the spell was something basic, the strength of it was enough to knock the mage off his feet and send him crashing into someone else.

Kvar stared at Kratos as he cut down the guards without any trouble. Humans, even ones with Exspheres, weren't supposed to be able to do magic. Yet Kratos had released the spell in the time it had taken to blink thrice.

The ringing of swords clashing with each other was loud in Anna's ears. Kvar's words were still going through her head. _Immortal…Lord Kratos…traitor…_

Kratos was one of them? Or had been? It fit, in a horrible kind of way.

Anna's head whipped around when she heard a crunching sound. A guard had crept around the fight, gun in hand and was aiming straight at Kratos.

She ran towards him, and only slowed when the gun swung to aim at her, but she dove a little to the side to avoid the bullet*. Anna winces because she's not fast enough to avoid it all and her shoulder's burning, but she's on her feet, stumbling a little, but struggling to get the guard to let go of the damn gun. But she was still thin, too thin, and he was a good head taller than her and he twisted her arms so that they were behind her at an acutely uncomfortable angle.

Instinctively, her foot comes up and pistons backwards and there's a satisfying _crack_ as his kneecap breaks.

Anna squirms free and snatches the gun from the guard's loose grasp. Looking up, she can hardly see Kratos, though she isn't sure whether that's from his speed or from the number of guards rushing him. Anna sights down her arms and pulls the trigger. One of the guards screamed and clutched at his shoulder.

The next instant, Kratos is in that man position again, the one just in front of her.

"You owe me." Anna tells him.

"Oh, I owe _you?_ Forgive me if I'm wrong, but did I or did I not get you out of here?"

"I saved your _life_, you ungrateful son of a—"

"Then that would make us even." Kratos had heard the guard's knee break, had heard the gunshot. He wouldn't say that she had saved his life, more like saved him from having a bullet hole somewhere in him, but he wasn't about to quibble about it at a time like this.

Kratos looked around. There was a great deal of guards and had he been alone, he could have dealt with them. But he couldn't look after Anna and fight them all off at the same time.

Anna had her mouth open to retort, but before she could get any words out, he clamped one arm around her waist and launched them skyward. Since her back was pressed to his chest, there weren't very many places to grab while he flew_ (Flying! How in Martel's name was he _doing _that?)_ far too fast, so Anna figured she would settle for swearing imaginatively at him.

It wasn't long before Kratos was gliding them down, setting her down before landing lightly a moment later.

Anna whirled to look at him and any words in her mouth died at what she saw. Fanning out from Kratos' shoulder blades were wings the color of ice. The last dredges of sunlight shining through them cast exotic shadows across the ground.

"You _are_ one of them, aren't you?" Involuntarily, she took a step back.

Kratos sheathed his sword and held up his hands, palm up. "I won't hurt you."

Anna frowned, studying him with calculating brown eyes. "You're one of those monsters that did this to me."

"I never agreed with this." Kratos said defensively. "I was against the idea of the ranches."

Her frown deepened. "Now that I think about it, I've never heard you call them a 'human' ranch. Just the ranch. Do we not that mean that much to you that we don't even…y'know, register?"  
"Must we have this conversation now?"

"You're not sidestepping this question, Kratos! I'm not going to let you."

"And I'm not trying to." It was partially a lie, but he wasn't going to admit that. "Yuan told me that when I got you out, to go to Luin. We can finish this conversation there."

"He's one of them too, isn't he?" Kratos nodded. "I can't believe I ever trusted you guys."

"At least give us the chance to explain." Kratos doesn't know why he's trying so hard for this woman whom he hardly knew. No, that was a lie. He'd come to know her over the month or so of their acquaintance.

He knew that she loved pears and plums. He knew the name of her best friend in Luin. He knew that she hated asparagus and ten-gald romance novels. He knew that she liked to dance, that she couldn't sleep in. She'd told him about her mother, who was a teacher in Luin, her father who was the mayor.

"Well, I don't exactly have a choice in the matter, do I? It's not like I can get away from these guys on my own."

If for nothing else, Kratos is grateful that she's at least practical.

-/-/

*-Okay, I have no idea if they actually are bullets since we never get a very good look at them, but let's just say that they are.


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Not much to say really. Been playing a lot of Baten Kaitos. It's gotten a little better, but I know it'll never be a favorite game of mine. They fail to develop the characters in a way to make it more interesting. Although I'm fond of Lyude and Savyna! And the storyline, as of yet, has yet to really stand out. I doubt I'll be doing much, if any, fanfiction on it.

As my brother and I have been working on our book, I have realized that it is really hard to write realistically about a place to which you've never been. In this case, Rome. So I'm stuck doing very little except dialogue and stretching scenes out right now, since my brother has had the good fortune to be able to live in Italy for about half a year.

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

**WARNING—Spoilers for…basically all of the backstory of the game.**

-/-/

"_Time is a great storyteller."—Irish Proverb_

-/-/

Yuan crossed his arms instinctively, leaning further against the wall in hopes that the slight awning might give him some better cover from the rain. He could go inside the inn across the street, but that was further away from Luin's main entrance and after the report he'd received earlier, he wasn't sure he could entirely keep the concern for his friend_ (Friend_s._ Anna, somehow, had become a friend as well after a month of knowing her. Not a close one, but enough that he could enjoy spending time with her.)_

Noishe is pressed up against the wall as well, his nose pressing into Yuan's ribs. The protozoan is still warm, despite his having spent just as long out here as Yuan had.

He's not sure how long he's been out here—time had long ago lost all meaning for him—but he knows that it's long enough that when he sees two blurry figures through the sheets of rain, he stands up straight. Noishe barks, wagging his tail and Yuan knows before he can make out any of their features, that it's Kratos and Anna.

"How long have you been out here?" Kratos asks, looking Yuan up and down. The half-elf is just as soaked as they are, but he makes a little more of a miserable sight. His hair is plastered to his cheeks and forehead. His cloak, long ago having had a charm woven into it to be water-proof, was wrapped around him. The skin that had been looking so much browner after these past few months was pale.

"Hell if I know. I intercepted a message earlier tonight saying that you were a known traitor to Cruxis and I came out here."

"Without bothering to check for clear weather, I'm assuming." Kratos says.

"This blasted storm nearly had me ending up in Hima." Yuan grumbled. "Can we please get inside?"  
Neither he nor Kratos could really feel temperatures. They felt a shadow of the cold rain, like feeling the world through a bubble, but that didn't mean that Yuan liked to be wet anymore than necessary.

"Not inside the inn, surely?"'

Yuan shook his head. "Bought an old houseboat when I heard that Anna had gotten herself caught."

"Hey!" Anna protested indignantly.

Yuan ignored her. "It's not great, but it's enough."

"You hate boats."

"Believe me, I know." Yuan said, huddling in his cloak as they walked through the muddy roads down to the small dock.

Both seraphim look back when Anna's footsteps stop. Before Yuan can ask what's wrong, Kratos answers. "That was where she used to live. Before."

_(Before was the one word that all three of them had in common. Before Martel's death, Before they'd nearly been pickpocketed by a little blonde angel-boy, Before she'd been taken to the ranch, Before everything went to Hell)_

Yuan doesn't ask how his friend knows that. Kratos had been the one Anna spent her days with and she seemed to trust him more, for whatever reason. Then again, Kratos had always had that trustable quality, even back when they were kids.

"We need to get inside, Anna." Yuan tells her. "The Desians are going to be all over this area in a matter of hours."

She walked reluctantly with them, eyes still half-focused on the mayor's house. Yuan cringed inwardly at the thought of stepping on the boat, but he couldn't be seen anywhere nearby and he was not about to attempt flying out of here in this storm. He'd never been particularly fond of Hima.

They all heave a sigh of relief as they get inside. It's not much warmer, but it was dry. The boat was small and had belonged to an old married couple. There was one bed, just large enough for two people, pushed into a corner with a small bathroom right beside it. There's a squishy couch that Noishe curls up in front of and a single rocking chair that looks like it was made of driftwood. There's a kitchenette with a small rectangular window near it.

Yuan is immediately across the room to the tiny oven _(Why the old couple thought it was a good idea to have an oven on a wooden boat, he doesn't have the faintest idea)_ and is turning it on, leaving the oven door open. It was something his mother used to do on the cold winter days. _(Ages and ages ago, so far back that he has difficulty remembering what she looked like)_

He can feel the change in mana that he knows is Kratos drying himself off. But it's only now that he's inside and there's no constant rain that he can smell the faint metallic smell that he'd learned so well during the battlefield.

Yuan looks back, studying them both. Normally, he knew that Kratos wouldn't have even been touched by Desian guards, but Anna fogged things up. Not necessarily in a bad way (_Though Yuan hasn't entirely ruled that out yet)_ but he knew that any kind of fog in a battle wasn't good. Satisfied that his best friend wasn't injured, he looked Anna over.

He looked over the signs of her torture. Yuan had seen those and knew that while they weren't old, they weren't fresh enough to be bleeding. He sees the tear in her sleeve and puts the pieces together.

The half-elf looks at Kratos. "You didn't think to heal her?"

"As if she would have allowed me to."

"What did Kratos do this time?" He asks her. Yuan isn't sure why he suddenly feels like his mother, or even why he's remembering her so much today. Then again, it had been a long time since he'd been caught in the rain for so long and his village had always rained plenty.

"It's more like what did the both of you do."

Yuan's mind immediately leaps to the worst conclusion, but he kept calm. "I'm not sure I understand you."

Anna arched her eyebrows. Yuan is struck by the sudden thought that being able to look intimidating in a situation where you should've looked ridiculous is something that wasn't thought to be had in the Y chromosome. "You're a terrible liar, Yuan."

It had been a long since anyone had been able to say that.

"She knows, Yuan." Kratos said unsheathing his sword before he sat down on the couch. He hadn't cleaned off the blood before sheathing it back at the ranch. His old swordmaster would have whacked him in the head with the very sword had he still been alive.

"You told me that you were going to give me an explanation." Anna tells Kratos.

Kratos begins to methodically clean his blade with a rag that he kept in a pouch on his belt. Before he can say anything, if he was going to at all, Yuan says, "Let us treat your wounds and then we'll tell you."

Anna eyes them both warily. Her arm is throbbing from where the bullet had gotten her and she knew it was bleeding. "Fine."

She takes a seat in the rocking chair, not sure she can stand to be too close to Kratos right now. Yuan looks back to the swordsman. "Kratos, if you would."

Kratos sheathes his sword again in one easy movement and stands, but when he takes a step towards her, Anna stiffens. Both of the seraphim catch the minute tensing of her muscles.

"Does it have to be him?"

"If you don't want to get pneumonia it does." Yuan replies. "I'd dry you by magic myself, but seeing as how you're all wet…"

Anna frowned in confusion and Kratos was the one that elaborated. "He specializes in lightning magic. Electricity and water don't mix very well." Granted, Yuan had excellent control. But magic was wild. It was like trying to muzzle a wolf. There were always bursts of magic that couldn't be controlled. It was a natural thing in any magic-user. Kratos can remember a few times when he'd spoken a simple spell to light a fireplace, but had ended up demolishing the entire wall. Neither Kratos nor Yuan wanted to chance that Yuan's natural magical affinity might accidentally electrocute her.

Kratos hadn't come any closer since she tensed. Anna had always thought that Kratos was a bit peculiar, what with his boundaries and his—well, gentlemanly wasn't quite the word, but then, was there any word to describe the way Kratos treated her?

She honestly had to debate between pneumonia or being too close to Kratos right now because he'd _lied_ to her. He was one of the monsters that had kept her locked up like a damn lab rat.

Finally she looks at him and says, "You gonna dry me or not? It's freezing."

Kratos doesn't touch her any more than necessary. He never has, His hands are on her forearm and he murmurs a word before there's a wonderful warmth throughout her, like she'd just stepped out to one of Palmacosta's wonderfully hot days.

Yuan carefully peels the torn cloth away from her injured arm. "It's not much worse than a graze, but it's fairly deep as far as grazes go. You were very fortunate. Had it gone deeper, you might have lost the use of the arm."

Both Yuan and Kratos are excellent Healers. Oh, they couldn't do complicated things like heart surgeries, but they'd learned their medicinal uses in the field, where you either learned it or bled to death. And they'd helped Martel on more than a few procedures as well.

"Usually, I wouldn't want to use magic on something like this." Yuan glances up at Anna's face before adding, "It's not good for the body. If magic is used to heal things that the body can take care of on its own, then the body's reactions to wounds slow. Sometimes they'll stop altogether. But with the state of you, the magic will actually be good. It gives your body one less thing to focus on fixing."

Kratos was back in his place on the couch. He could see that Anna was angry with him. He's sure that the only thing stopping her from punching him had been her own practicality and the knowledge that, if she were to punch him in her present condition, it would do her more harm than him.

Yuan was tracing the graze with his finger, murmuring, "First Aid."

The warm magic spread through her arm and Anna watched in reluctant fascination as the flesh knitted itself back together, leaving the skin clean and unmarked as the day she was born.

"The rest?" Yuan said, sitting back on his heels and looking up at her expectantly.

"They're minor." Anna said, waving him off. "I can take care of them myself."

Yuan didn't say anything, didn't move. He only gave her a look. Anna sighed and shrugged her shirt up so that it rested on her shoulder blades, but still didn't show anything. True, Kratos had already seen her topless that first day and she doubted that either of these two would either care or look if they did, but it was both the principle of the thing and force of habit.

Anna's eyes landed on Noishe, whom Kratos was drying off with magic. Noishe bared his teeth at the swordsman as the moisture steamed itself away from his fur. Kratos didn't react, though. He knew Noishe didn't like magic being used on him.

"What is Noishe?"

Kratos glanced up at her. "I told you that already."

"You told me he was a dog. Clearly, he isn't. Look at him! He's as big as a horse and he's smarter than any dog I've ever seen."

"Did you ever think that there are many wonders that you have yet to see, Anna?"

"I don't think men and their lies are any kind of wonder to any woman." Anna retorted icily.

"There's no use lying to her for much longer, Kratos." Yuan told him. "And _you_ were the one that promised her an explanation."

"Yes, yes. Another thing that's my fault."

"I'll add it to the list."

"Explanation, please." Anna cut into the conversation.

The seraphim looked at each other. "I'm not starting it." Yuan said. "It kind of started with you anyway."

"I never knew you to be a sellout, Yuan." Kratos said, glaring at him.

Anna stopped the argument that she knew would ensure between them. She wasn't sure she could really call it an argument since they didn't actually raise their voices at each other, but it was what they did. "Guys."

Kratos sighed, leaning back. "Where to start?"

"At the beginning would be great."

"The problem is that we're not sure exactly where it began."

"Then how about starting as to why you had the...wings." Her eyes flicked to Yuan. "You have them too, don't you?"

Yuan is sure that Kratos had only exposed his wings out of necessity, but that doesn't stop the annoyance from creeping into his mind. He nods and releases the ball of mana that keeps his wings in check.

Anna tilts her head, studying the violet appendages. "Is it supposed to be a different color?"  
Yuan lifts and drops his shoulders in a graceful shrug. "It's always been like that."

"How long have you guys had them?"

And now the start of the difficult part of the conversation.

"…Four thousand years, give or take a decade or two."

Both seraphim swear that, even living as long as they have, they've never seen anyone's eyes go quite as wide as Anna's did. A moment later, her eyes narrowed and searched Yuan's face before swinging around and doing the same to Kratos. "You're not lying. This isn't some elaborate joke."

"If it is a joke, we have a really morbid sense of humor." Kratos remarked.

"But it is elaborate, what we've done."

Anna didn't like the sudden darkness in Yuan's eyes. "…And what is it that you guys have done?"

"You won't believe us." Yuan warned.

Anna crossed her legs and folded her arms across her stomach. "I didn't believe dogs could be naturally green either. Try me."

Kratos combed a hand through his hair. "I don't think I need to tell you about the Church of Martel."

"That's a rather odd place to start. Everyone knows about it. There was a great tree that was the source of mana. But because of a terrible war, the tree began to wither and die and a hero's life was sacrificed in its place. The Goddess Martel, filled with sorrow, disappeared into heaven. But before she did, she left the angels with the edict that they should wake her, for if they didn't, the world would be destroyed. The angels gave the world the Chosen One. And that was when the regeneration of the world began."

"That isn't…quite…how it went." Yuan said.

"Well, I haven't been to school in more than eight years, so forgive me if I forgot a few details."  
"What he means is that most of what you've ever heard or learned in your life regarding the Church of Martel is a lie."

"What are you talking about?"

"There is no Goddess. There never was."

"I'm not sure I understand."

Yuan moved to sit beside Kratos, clasping his hands in front of him. He glanced at his best friend.

"You'd best start it off." Kratos told him. "You were the one in the middle of it all."

"Where to start….okay. When Kratos and I were children-"

"Four thousand years ago."

Yuan nodded. "Right. When we were children, the Kharlan War had begun long before. Back then, the half-elves had their own territory. It wasn't large, as far as territories go, but it was a place we could call home. Most of the politics that started the war happened long before either of us was born and much of it had already been erased by history, so we can't even really help you understand why it all began.

"It started with some border skirmishes. You know, some people on land that wasn't theirs. Small stuff. But the humans decided to invade. Every able-bodied half-elven male over the age of ten was drafted. Most of them didn't need to be told twice. They were more than happy to serve our king and our country."

"And they knew what would happen if their country became invaded or if they left." Kratos added.

Seeing Anna's confusion, Yuan explained, "Slavery. Half-elves were commonly slaves in those days. Legally, the humans couldn't get the half-elves out of the country. But with the skirmishes, there was also invasions. Anyone captured were either treated as prisoners of war or taken as slaves to the wealthy."

Kratos took over the story seamlessly and Anna wonders if that's how he and Yuan had lived their four thousand years. Sometimes, they seemed little more than one person in two bodies and other times they were two powerful forces of nature raging against each other. It was incredible.

"When we were—what, twenty-two?" Yuan nodded and Kratos continued, "We met a young woman. Her name was Martel." Kratos saw something click behind Anna's eyes. "She and her little brother, Mithos, were advocating for peace between the two nations. Unfortunately, no one was willing to listen to two half-elves speaking in town squares.

"We traveled with them for about a year or so. They were dangerous times, especially for two half-elves travelling alone. We joined the half-elf military—"

"Hang on," Anna interrupted. "You're human, right?"

"Basically." Kratos hadn't considered himself human since the first symptoms of the angel transformation, but he didn't feel like splitting hairs right now.

"So why were you with Yuan in the first place? The humans and the half-elves were against each other, weren't they?"

As Kratos opened his mouth and closed it again, trying to phrase the situation delicately, Yuan answered for him. "I was his slave."

"What?"

"It was a bit more complicated than that, but he was." Kratos still has a piece of Yuan's torn and burnt ownership papers. They'd both agreed that, just as soon as the war was over, they were equals. Well, they'd agreed to that years before, but they'd still used the fact that Yuan was Kratos' slave to get past a lot of trouble with the humans.

Anna tries to imagine Yuan as subservient and finds that she can't. He had a fierce independence and dryness that didn't seem to fit with anything she'd ever heard of in slaves.

Slaves to the wealthy, Yuan had said. She found it equally difficult to think of Kratos as ever being rich. He wasn't classically handsome, like the old fairy tales described. He wasn't blonde, wasn't pale and his eyes weren't blue. He had a darkness to him that the stories never mentioned. A solemnity and lethality that no prince charming would ever have.

And Kratos didn't act like he'd ever been wealthy either. He had no accent, no hint to where he began life. He didn't slouch, but his posture wasn't that perfect kind that the rich had. It was the unconscious neat and ramrod straight posture that military veterans had. His hands weren't slender and long. They were calloused and steady, with small scars on his knuckles.

"Forget it." Anna said, waving away their puzzled furrowed brows. "You guys joined the half-elf military…"

"Martel worked as a field Healer." Kratos continued. "I was in charge of training all of the new recruits their swordsmanship and Yuan taught them their basic magic. So, naturally, we taught Mithos as well. But he preferred spells to swordsmanship, though he was good with a sword as well. He and Yuan didn't get along very well…"

"Why?" Anna asked, genuinely perplexed. Yuan had a sharp tongue, especially with his sarcasm, but he was a good enough man.

"Martel and I were…kind of in a relationship." Yuan answered.

Kratos snorted. "Kind of? You ended up engaged."

Yuan's lips tilted into a fond smile that Anna had never seen on his features before. His fingers are twisting a ring on his left hand, one she hadn't noticed. "That we did."

"And Mithos was jealous?"

"Well, he and Martel lost their parents early on in the war." Yuan told her reasonably, tucking his bangs behind his ear. "Mithos couldn't even really remember them. Martel had raised him, even as she was growing up herself. She was his whole world." Anna hates the terrible sorrow in both of their eyes and she isn't sure she wants to know what the cause of it was.

"So you were the one who had to teach Mithos his magic?" Anna assumed.

"Yes. He was…a prodigy with magic. But the war was getting worse and the King changed the age to become part of the army. Mithos was too young. But he wanted to fight, he wanted peace."

"We'd been fighting in the war for…maybe three years when the King came out one morning, very early. The fog was still on the ground and the sun was only just rising." From the look in Yuan's eyes, he could still see that camp, could still hear the King's voice. "His spies had just found out where the prisoners of war were being taken. Not to a prison, not to be publicly executed. They were put to work in ranches to develop weapons for the humans."

Anna shoved the memories she knew were trying to rise up back down, down far enough that they wouldn't rise. "I thought that it was the half-elves who put the humans to work."

They shook their heads. "Not originally."

"Then why…?"

"Don't worry. We'll get to that. In any case, the King tried a frontal assault on one of the ranches, to try and get back his people trapped there." Yuan shook his head, running a hand through his hair. "It was a slaughter. The humans had been going head to head with the half-elves for so long because they had magitechnology. But we had no idea that they'd been building their newest weapon. Officially, it's called a Mana Cannon, but in the half-elves' stories of the time, if any have still survived, they call it Thor's Hammer.

"Our numbers were devastated. About half of those who'd been part of the attack left that battlefield alive. Less than a third of those people lived through it all, the injuries were so terrible. We needed our men back more than ever. But we couldn't try another attack like that again. Mithos dragged Martel, Kratos and myself to the King's tent one night and suggested that he send a small team to infiltrate the ranch and free the prisoners."

"Specifically you guys, I'm guessing?"

"Right. The King agreed with Mithos as far as infiltrating, but he didn't agree that one of the half-elf's army's best medic and a child should go. Naturally, Mithos didn't like that. The King's plan was to have the infiltration team go the next day, so that they would have time to rest and plan. We did it that night."

"The King didn't like that, right?"

"Not at all. Of course, he couldn't really complain because we had brought back his people. But we were publicly flogged for direct disobedience."

The wounds on Anna's back, nearly healed, throbbed. "Are you serious? That's completely ridiculous!"

They both blink up at her. "No it wasn't."

"Anna, think about it." Kratos said patiently. "Had he not punished us, it would have been giving the other troops license to disobey him as well. It's how things work with authority. But he lets us know that he was not truly angry with us because he allowed Martel to heal us afterwards."

"It still sounds insane." Anna muttered, crossing her arms.

"After that, the King unofficially deigned us his ranch infiltrators. We were travelling again and freeing his soldiers."

"Which is how you knew what to do when you decided to get the humans out of the ranches."

They nodded. "We did that for roughly a year. But the war was escalating. The casualties were increasing, more homes were being destroyed, especially with the Mana Cannon. And the Giant Kharlan Tree was dying, despite any efforts to keep it alive. Magitechnology uses an abhorrent amount of mana and the humans had been using it for decades to hold their own in the war. Mithos came up with the idea that the half-elves and the humans could live in peace."

Anna vaguely remembered hearing this very tale in school, but there was something, some weight in Kratos and Yuan's voices that made it seem much different. "Did that ever actually happen? If it did, things certainly changed."

"In the eyes of the law, it did change. We went to the human King and told him our proposal. There was a mountain range that bordered the coast. It was difficult to cross and the human port there didn't have a very good trade market. What Mithos suggested was that the half-elves would get the land on one side of the mountains, the humans get the other and the elves would remain where they were on their southern continent, but that the half-elves got to keep any cities they had that were still standing. The other condition was that the Mana Cannon had to be destroyed."

Kratos stood and lowered the temperature on the oven. The rain had long ago stopped and the chill it had brought was receding. Yuan continued the story.

"The humans' King agreed because his people would be getting the half-elves' farmland and our King knew that we were accustomed to living in the mountains and since we were such a close-knit community, there would be no problem with sea trade. They signed the peace treaty in a place that was decided to be neutral territory. That place was later named the Holy Ground of Kharlan."

"Isn't the Holy Ground of Kharlan where the Tower of Salvation is said to be?"

"We're getting there." Yuan assured. "There was…well, it wasn't peace really, but it was as close to it as the two races could have gotten after decades of war. There was a new law written up that said that it was illegal to discriminate against someone because of their race. But just because the law says something's true doesn't mean that the people will back it up if they don't believe it to be true. The outright discrimination did stop, but when the humans had already begun living in half-elven cities and vice versa during the war. They couldn't stop us from entering their territory if they had a visa, but it was still difficult to find work and houses."

"And it wasn't just the half-elves." Kratos said as he began making tea. He always carried herbs in a pouch on his belt, a habit he'd gotten from Martel. "Anyone who had been sympathetic to them during the war was shunned as well."

"It was like that for a while, but then…" Yuan fell silent, gaze focused on the ring he was still twisting on his left hand.

Both of the men's eyes grew dark with memory, Yuan's especially, and Kratos picked up the story without missing a beat. "We were travelling to the capital city to help with the little negotiations that follow such a large treaty. We were a little less than three miles from the main gates when a group of humans that didn't agree with the peace treaty came up to us.

"They were spouting curses and lots of politics," Kratos can still remember every detail of that day, though he tells himself he doesn't. "Martel…she was always very strong-willed, very opinionated…she stepped right up to them and began arguing with them. Something she said sparked them off and they pulled a knife."

Anna doesn't need to hear the next part, can't hear it anyway, because what Kratos said next was so quiet that it was hardly a whisper. Martel had been killed, which was why Anna heard nothing of Yuan having to go home to his wife, or any anecdotes about any children.

Kratos pushes a mug of tea into Yuan's hands before holding one out to Anna. She sniffed it before taking a sip. It was wonderfully spicy and just this side of hot so that it burned as it went down her throat. Anna appreciated the distraction from the tale that was growing increasingly darker.

Yuan downed half of the tea before speaking. "Martel's last words to us were that she wanted to see a world without discrimination. Mithos…he went mad with grief. Literally. But he tried to stay within spitting distance of sane most days. Tried to continue going on as though Martel hadn't died. To his eyes, she hadn't, you see."

"We were given Exshpheres during the war." Kratos says, holding out his left hand, palm down. Anna had noticed the small, round object before, but hadn't thought to comment on it before. "We've already told you what they do. They were discovered early in the war by a group of human miners. But no one knew that they had the ability to develop. Exshperes depend on their hosts' body's emotional responses to grow. Specifically, the negative emotions. Fear, pain, suffering…all those things feed an Exshpere. During a war, those emotions are more than plentiful and no one really noticed.

"But after the war is when the effects really started appearing more often. Strange diseases started affecting veterans, a few monsters never before seen were reported sighted at the same time that people went missing. And a few of the Exspheres, mostly those of the soldiers who'd been in the war the longest, evolved into something else entirely. The symptoms were small things at first. Food started having no taste, we no longer could sleep. The Healers and doctors all contributed it to post-traumatic stress and most of those affected accepted that. A lot of people removed their Exspheres. They didn't need them after all, the war was over.

"Mithos was the first one to get his wings. Martel's death had filled him with so much grief that it evolved the Exsphere into something else entirely. We later decided to call it a Cruxis Crystal. It didn't take very long for Yuan and myself to get our wings as well. Mithos came up with…with a rather…disturbing plan to fulfill Martel's last wish. We discovered that when our Exspheres became Cruxis Crystals that whatever it was that identified the magic in the blood was neutralized. Mithos' plan was to have everyone get Cruxis Crystals so that they would become just like us. If everyone's blood was the same, discrimination would stop. And he wished to revive Martel."

"Revive Martel? Like, bring her back from the dead? That's impossible!"

"No, it isn't. Not technically. The Cruxis Crystal slowly absorbs a person, and when they die, it fully takes the person's soul inside them. Martel's soul had been trapped inside her Exshpere and Mithos began researching a way to transfer a soul into another body."

Yuan swallowed a hot gulp of tea, hands holding the chipped mug tightly. "It took almost a century, but he succeeded in creating more Cruxis Crystals. Everyone who had ever been in the war became…angels." Yuan half-choked on the word that he hated.

"Angels?" Anna repeated. "But…your wings don't look anything like the wings I've seen in the history books."

"That's because, to fully become an angel, you have to die so that the Crystal can absorb your soul. Since we're still alive, our wings are a portion of the mana in our bodies solidified. And when you die, the mana in your body runs out. Since there's no mana to make the wings, the wings are changed into that of flesh and blood and feathers, like the ones you see in the books. The only way to kill one of those angels, really kill them, is to destroy the Crystal. You could kill their body, but the soul that belonged to that body still exists in the Crystal."

Anna tried to imagine living forever, not being able to even speak. Unable to feel the breeze or eat your favorite foods. Or laugh, or feel warm when you share a blanket with someone or feel snow in your hands.

The more Anna tried to imagine it, the sicker she felt.

"Slowly, everyone who remembered the war began to die off, naturally. Mithos knew that if he wanted to really be able to get this…world without discrimination, that he would have to be able to control the world. So we all sat down one night and drew up an entirely new history. The things you know about the war are the same. But everything else is more or less a lie."

"And how's that?"

"Do you know about Summon Spirits?"  
"Not really. I've heard of them, but…" But she hadn't been old enough before the Desians had taken her to learn the details.

"We had to go around making pacts with the Summon Spirits to keep up with the humans and their Mana Cannon. "The King of Summon Spirits is called Origin." Yuan sounded as though he were reciting something he'd memorized long ago. "He and Mithos were close, as far as a summoner and a Summon Spirit are concerned. Mithos asked Origin to make him the Eternal Sword, which Mithos used to split the world into two."

"That's-"

"Impossible? Not with the Eternal Sword. Have you heard of Tethe'alla?"

"The moon?"

"It's not the moon. Tethe'alla is the other half of the world. Sylvarant and Tethe'alla were the two countries that fought in the Kharlan War. He anchored the two worlds together but placing the Great Seed in between them."

"I was always told that the Great Seed was the Soul of Mithos."

"The three of us together can come up with very intricate stories." Yuan told her. "The Great Seed is the seed of The Giant Kharlan Tree, which had died not long after the war. Mithos wants to keep it safe so that it doesn't die too."

"I don't understand the point of separating the worlds."

"It was so that the mana left in the world wasn't depleted. By separating the worlds and cycling the mana, kind of like an hourglass, the production of magitechnology is kept to a minimum."

"And how does the cycling of the mana or whatever work?"

"That's where the Chosen comes in. When the Chosen releases the seals and goes to the Tower of Salvation, it reverses the mana flow."

"So, the world isn't really regenerated."

"No."

Anna put a hand to her forehead. She could feel a headache starting to develop behind her eyes. This was all…impossible, but it made sense. Perfect sense, really. No one ever saw a Chosen again after they left on their journey of regeneration.

"So the Chosen becomes an angel? Like, an actual one?"

"Yes. Mithos, through the organization of half-elves who agree with him that you know as Cruxis, has been controlling the Chosen lineage for…roughly the past four thousand years. It started with the people that were the closest match to Martel's mana signature, after Mithos discovered the process to transferring Martel's soul into another body. He controlled their marriages so that the mana signatures would be similar and hopefully, one of them will be an exact, or a close enough, match, to Martel's."

"And you guys helped him make up all of this? Helped him control these people's lives, helped _lie_ to _everyone_? I thought you guys would have better sense!"

Kratos didn't flinch away from her anger, as many men who'd been faced with it did. "At the time that it was all suggested, we were still undergoing the angel transformation and were still grieving over Martel. I think that perhaps we wanted to believe that Mithos was right. That this was the way to end discrimination, that we were making a better world."

"That's how you were going to live for eternity? Just lording over people's lives like that?"

"We're cowards, Anna." Yuan says, looking up at her. His bangs, fallen forward from where he had tucked them behind his triangular ear, are hiding half of his face from her and being looked at like that. His eyes, though they were that green with its flecks of blue, looked as dark and fathomless as the space between the stars. When Anna's gaze switches over to Kratos, his eyes look precisely the same. "We've both tried countless times to kill ourselves since we realized what we've done. But we can't."

Anna glances at Kratos' left hand, resting on the back of the couch. He hadn't sat down again after he'd gone to make tea. As though he were too restless to sit, but too calm to pace. There are thin scratches on his Crystal and Anna is struck by the mental image of a knife trying to cut into the hard surface of the Crystal, but the hand holding the knife failing at the last minute.

"Then why don't you try and change what you've done? Fight Mithos!"

"We've been doing that recently. We can't fight against Mithos directly, but we're working on overthrowing him. We need to get our hands on the Eternal Sword, but we have no summoning abilities, so we can't make the pact with Origin necessary to gain control of the Eternal Sword."

"So what are you doing to stop him?" Anna demanded.

"Freeing the prisoners he's using to make more Exspheres is all we can do right now." Yuan explained. "I'm working on making my own rebel organization to stop the regeneration cycle. We can kill the Chosen, therefore stopping that particular mana lineage."

"But…weren't you in love with Martel?"

Yuan's brow creased in confusion. "Yes."

"…Don't you want her back?"

Yuan can still remember precisely how Martel had smiled, the timbre of her laugh. The age-old ache for her to be _here_ thudded stronger, but Yuan forced that ache away. "Of course I do. But Martel's dead. We're not gods. The realm of death isn't ours to control or try to change."

"Apparently not if you're still alive."

"We don't have any illusions on what we are." Kratos said. "Anna, we're monsters. What we did was wrong and evil and we know that, but we're trying to change it."

"And what is it that you plan to do if you do overthrow Mithos? What then? Just keep living in a world that you helped twist and fixed?"

"We're not going to live there. There's no place for us there."

"Besides," Yuan added, "We've lived long enough. We can't watch over the world forever."

Anna was silent for long minutes. Yuan stood and eased the mug from her hands and put them in the sink. "How are you still alive after all this time? Is it the Cruxis Crystal?"

"Yes."

"…Is that all going to happen to me? Not being able to sleep or taste…"

"…Eventually. But we're trying to stop that."

Anna looked up at Kratos. "How?"

"The project that Kvar's been using you for, the Angelus Project, it's to create Cruxis Crystals faster. But you've had that Exsphere eight years and it hasn't evolved yet."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"Quite the opposite. I believe that Kvar's experiments have actually slowed the evolution of your Exsphere."

Anna smiled, relieved. "Thank the—I suppose I can't say Goddess, seeing as how there isn't one."

"You can, if you like."

Anna got to her feet because she needed something to do other than sit. She considers the two men that had not only saved her life, but tried to give her a new one. She tries to see the angels that had helped twisted the world—world_s_—into their current state, tried to see the monsters that had lived for four thousand years and had assisted in the destroying of two entire cultures for a madman and a dead woman.

She can't.

All she can see is Yuan standing beside the sink still, arms crossed. She could see no monster in the admittedly pretty features. Anna can still think of him as the man who'd made sarcastic quips as he helped her prepare dinner, the one whose clothes he'd allowed her to borrow.

And Anna, as hard as she tries because she does want to hate Kratos for lying, for pretending to be something he wasn't all this time_ (She's not sure why it feels like he betrayed her because Yuan had done the same, but she can't find any rage for the half-elf. Only for Kratos)_, she can't. Kratos had sat inside with her on some of Palmacosta's rainy days and taught her to play chess, had gone shopping with her when she asked. He'd taken care of her, had healed her wounds and had protected her like no man had ever done before.

They're watching her with concern now, because she's been staring at them too long.

"What?" They both ask.

Anna smiles a little wider. This little boat was going to be her home for a while, but it was in her hometown and she isn't sure that she could ever truly hate either of these men. "I call dibs on the bed."


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **_Finally_ got Arc Rise Fantasia. Started playing it and fell in love with it. It's got a vibe similar to Tales of Symphonia and a bit of Final Fantasy in there, so of course it's good. So far, it's got humor, an interesting storyline, cool characters (Except for the females, but I've learned to accept that) and the badass.

Started watching Highlander and kudos to anyone who can find the reference in here.

Got a costume party to go to. I'm gonna be a gypsy. :)

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/

"_Family faces are magic mirrors. Looking at people who belong to us, we see the past, present, and future. ~Gail Lumet Buckley_

-/-/

Someone was gently shaking her shoulder. "Anna…._Anna_."

She turns over and looks up at the familiar face that the voice belonged to. "'S too early, Yuan."

"To the contrary." Yuan said, amused. "It's nearly noon. I thought you'd appreciate some lunch."

Anna eyed him warily. "Did you make it?"

He glared flatly at her. "You've clearly known Kratos too long. And no. I got it in town. There was a vendor near the fountain."

Anna sat up, stretching and yawning. From the window near the kitchenette, bright midday sun was streaming in. "What's for lunch?"  
"That depends. Do you prefer chicken or pork?"

"Chicken."

Yuan handed her a small plate with three hot chicken buns on it. Much of Luin's meat was either chicken or fish. Pork was harder to find out here and Anna had never much liked the texture of it.

"Have the Desians come by?" Anna asked, taking a bite of the chicken bun. It was wonderfully warm and just the right amount of crispy. She'd forgotten how, when the pear tree hadn't yet bloomed, she and her best friend would get buns from the vendor and wander through the town.

"The patrols have been through, but they haven't come by here." Kratos replied, sitting in the rocking chair. "But that's bound to change. We need a more solid plan."

"Well, I still haven't figured out the kinks of that invisibility spell, so that's out for now. And all of Cruxis knows your face, Kratos. The only thing I can think of is to disguise yourselves."

"I agree with the idea, but what do you mean specifically?" Noishe was nudging his wet nose into Kratos' palm and the human scratched at the furry ears.

"Nothing terribly drastic…A haircut and some dye, definitely. And some of that face paint for the scar." Yuan said, nodding to Anna. The burn on her cheek itched a bit.

It took Anna a moment to realize that when Yuan said face paint, he meant make-up. "And where are we going to get the make-up? Contrary to popular belief, women do not constantly carry a bag of it wherever they go."

Yuan clicked his tongue. He hadn't thought of that. Kratos looked up at his best friend and the half-elf hadn't seen that look in the garnet eyes for centuries. "…What are you thinking?" Yuan asked suspiciously.

"Well, Anna and I clearly cannot go and get the objects you mentioned, which means you would have to." Seeing the protest coming to Yuan's lips, Kratos continued, "Don't worry, Yuan. I don't think the women also buying face paint will mind such an…exotic…man among them."

"You're evil." Yuan said flatly.

"The other option would be dressing as a woman, but somehow, I think that you will object more to that."

Anna grinned. "Swallow your pride and go, Yuan."

"Stop helping." He snapped.

Her grin widens. "I don't think you're winning this argument, Yuan." She told him.

The half-elf glanced between her and Kratos. "No, I don't think so either. Not with two stubborn evil masterminds in the room, at least. You owe me big, the both of you."

-/-/-/-/-

Anna stared at the person in the mirror. "…I look weird."

"Good. That means that this whole thing was a success. Now come here so I can cut your hair."

"Anna, don't let him near the scissors." Kratos said, coming into the bathroom. "He's a disaster with them."

"I've cut my hair for centuries!" Yuan said, affronted.

"Precisely my point.

Kratos grabbed the scissors and brush from the counter and carefully began to comb through Anna's newly dark blonde locks. It takes longer than she thought it would, but Kratos' hands are gentle and methodical. When he finally sets the scissors and brush back down, Anna doesn't quite want to look in the mirror again.

She gathers the courage, however, and does. While she'd recognized herself before, she doesn't now. But there was no one else that the person in the mirror could be. Neither Yuan nor Kratos had short, blonde locks or a burn on their cheek.

"…Doesn't look so bad." Anna said, trying not to hate it. It was necessary and Anna had always prided herself on her practicality. But there was the inherent female thing that still liked a little vanity and the feeling that she wanted to recognize her own reflection.

"Believe me, it'll look better than Kratos' when he's done." Yuan promised.

Kratos doesn't like having Yuan dye his hair, but they couldn't leave Anna by herself and Kratos couldn't go back to Cruxis, so it was only logical that Kratos stayed. And he couldn't walk around looking like himself since the Desians knew his face.

Kratos sits still, though it takes all of the patience that his old master beat into him to do it. The dye feels cold when it drips down his neck and he can't tell what color it's supposed to be.

"The box says that you have to let the dye sit for an hour." Yuan read. "So that gives us time to figure out how to hide that burn."

"I know how to put on make-up, Yuan."  
His eyebrows arched. "When was the last time you used the stuff?"

It scares Anna that she can't remember right away. She has to really think back and she finds it difficult to remember anything past the horror of the ranch, the dimness of her cell. But slowly, she's remembering bits of Before. The juicy taste of fresh pears, a bright, shy smile; the look of the fountain at night as fireworks lit the sky.

"I was…thirteen. It was festival time and I wanted to dress up."  
It's the first time either of the men can remember her mentioning any number relating to her age.

"Well, no matter how good that face paint might have looked then, this is something different. Back then, you were using it to look more beautiful. This time, you need it to blend into the background."

"And you're going to help me do that?" Anna doesn't think that anyone else could stand out more. Even if Yuan hadn't had such an unusual shade of color for his hair, he would still be noticeable in a crowd.

"We're blended into the background for four thousand years. I think we know what we're doing." Yuan looks at the assorted tubes that he'd found at the store. "…I don't know what any of this does."

"How did you know what you were buying?"

"I asked around and I chose colors that looked vaguely skin-like."

"This cannot end well."

"Look, this can't be theoretical physics. We're three intelligent adults here. We should be able to figure it out."

It takes hours to figure it out and Yuan swears up and down that he hates face paint.

-/-/

It takes Anna almost an entire day to be able to hide the burn well, but she gets faster with practice. She's still not used to seeing herself as blonde and hardly recognizes Kratos with dark brown hair that was nearly black and cut short enough that he looks like he's in the military.

Yuan is gone for days, sometimes weeks, at a time. And every time he comes back, he always hesitates for a moment before stepping on the boat. When Anna asks Kratos about the apparent fear of boats, Kratos shakes his head and doesn't reply.

Because while what they had told her about Mithos and Martel, about the war, about Cruxis, was all personal, it wasn't _personal_ and they were both still naturally private men.

They're shopping for clothes—Anna is still thin, but she's been fleshing out and looking much more like a healthy person rather than a scarecrow and the clothes she'd worn in the ranch don't fit even if she'd wanted to wear them—when Kratos taps her shoulder. He still doesn't touch her unless necessary, so she turns to him, a question in her eyes.

Kratos nods to the children playing outside, a boy and a girl, visible through the window. "…That's your sister."

Anna doesn't think to ask how he knows this because all she can do is stare. "…I have a sister?"

Kratos doesn't answer her, doesn't really need to. Anna looks more like the little girl than ever with the dyed blonde hair. He sees her eyes shift to the woman watching the children and he isn't sure if he has to stop her—or if he should, if it came to that—because it is her mother after all.

But he doesn't have to because Anna smiles a little sadly. "She looks happy."

It's like she was never gone. Her memories come easier to her now_ (They were never gone, just buried because memories hurt, especially memories of those you loved and Anna doesn't want to imagine being haunted by those kinds of memories for four thousand years)_ and she can remember her mother watching over her and her best friend back then, just like she was now.

"I…I can't talk to her, can I?"

Kratos isn't sure whether the question is rhetorical or not, but he answers her anyway. "Not for a while."

It hurts, Anna won't pretend otherwise. It hurts seeing the life she could have had, the life she was supposed to have had except for a madman and…Anna wasn't sure there _was_ a word to describe Kratos and Yuan. They weren't mad, no they were sane enough. But there was something not right in them. A dark side and she snorts mentally when she thinks that. A dark side. It sounded like something out of one of those cheesy old films, but it described them well.

She had seen Kratos kill. He did it with an impersonal indifference, a cold flame. Anna hasn't seen Yuan fight, but she doesn't think she wants to.

"It's all your fault." She tells him, turning away from the window.

He doesn't deny it.

-/-/-/

"Sir."

Yuan looks at Botta. The man was his second-in-command now that they'd weeded out Makar and his associates. It had taken weeks and weeks of work and sleepless nights to do it_ (Which are nothing new to Yuan, but he'd forgotten just how much he hated not even pretending to sleep)_ but they did it.

"What is it?"

Botta didn't ask where Yuan went on the days he left, sometimes not returning for days. He doesn't ask about the plain clothes that he'd picked up in some small town. Doesn't ask about the request that Yuan makes sometimes to Doria to make two extra helpings. For better or worse, he's chosen to place his trust in this man, despite the secrets and the sarcasm.

"You owe us an explanation."

Yuan had nearly forgotten in the turmoil of the last few weeks. But he had promised Botta an explanation_ (And Kratos would look at him _that_ way again because Yuan had been blaming, not seriously of course, Kratos for promising Anna the very same thing)_ and he was a man of his word.

"Will it suffice if I was to tell it to you and you can tell it to the men?" Recently_ (Ever since he and Kratos had spilled the tale to Anna) _the memories had been too close to the surface and he doesn't feel like telling the story loud enough for an entire room of rebels to hear.

"If you think that's the way it should be, sir."

Yuan gestures for Botta to sit and begins to speak.

-/-/-/-

Kratos starts up a small job as an herbalist, for the purpose of the cover of course. But that doesn't mean that he isn't good at what he does. When people come to him for tonics and cough syrups, he makes them obligingly.

He works from the deck of their small houseboat and he keeps a small, hand drawn chart beside him. The chart is of lethal doses of plants' leaves, roots and seeds by their preparation, whether it be a tincture, a powder, a paste or a tea, cross-referenced by body weight, sex and age of the patient.

When Yuan found out about the herbalist job, a strange look came into the green eyes. But before he can say anything, however, someone else is walking across the plank onto their boat.

"Are you the herbalist?" The man's voice is soft and a little hoarse.

"I am." Kratos replied. "What can I do for you?"

"It's my daughter." The man said, pushing a stray lock of light brown hair out of his pale blue eyes. "She's been ill and the doctor can't figure out what's wrong."

"What are her symptoms?"

"She's been coughing a lot and it doesn't sound like a cough at all. She's thrown up a few times and she's been sneezing a lot."

To Anna's surprise, Yuan was the one that took Kratos' chart and began mixing a few things and boiling them into a tea. "Have her drink this." Yuan told him, holding out the mug. Then, handing him a packet of powder, he added, "And put this in her drinks for the next week or so. She should be better in no time."

The man looks over at Kratos. "Who is this?"

"My partner. He's just as good at medicine as I am."

The man smiled in relief, paying them their fifty gald before leaving.

Anna turns to Yuan. "I didn't know you knew herbology too."

"Martel taught us both a lot in our travels. And I know the symptoms he was talking about. The kids in my village would catch it often."

Yuan doesn't say anymore but it's the first _personal_ thing Anna's really heard from him and she's grateful.

It's been nearly two weeks since then and Anna's hand immediately tightens on the knife she's using to slice a pear when she hears a knock on the door. Kratos had gone with Yuan to help him set up some magitechnology in that base of his and she knew that that was all the way in Triet. Even flying, they wouldn't be here until supper.

"Who is it?" Anna calls.

"I came for a powder a few weeks back. I was wondering if the herbalist is home."

Anna loosens her grip on the knife _(She can still hear the Desians. Sometimes, she wakes up thinking she's still in her cell and she only calms once she sees Noishe curled up by the over and Kratos greeting her good morning)_ and opens the door. It's the young man with pale eyes and the light brown hair, the one with the daughter.

"He's out at the moment, but he'll be back later tonight if it's an emergency."

"No, no. I just, I wanted to thank him. My daughter's well again and it wouldn't have happened if it weren't for him."

"He has a way of doing that kind of thing for people. Pear?" Anna points at the fruit.

"Um, sure. I'm Nolan, by the way. Nolan McLeod."

She doesn't answer right away because the name is ringing a dim bell in her head. But she shakes the thought away because she'd been in close quarters with a hundred other prisoners from around the world. One of them had to have been named Nolan too.

As she hands him the slice of pear, his eyes narrow at her. "…Anna? Anna Fletcher?"

Anna stiffens. "…How'd you know my name?" All three of them had agreed that they wouldn't use their real names while they were in Luin.

He smiles. His smile is bright and a little shy. "You don't remember me?"

She knows that smile, she knows she does. But she can't put anything else with it except for the taste of pears and fireworks.

"We used to be neighbors. My parents had a pear tree in the backyard."

_My best friend, his parents had a pear tree in the yard and we used to eat them during the summer._

Dear Goddess, Anna had forgotten her best friend. She's trying hard to remember anything about Nolan McLeod, but she can't. She remembers vague little things, things that she isn't sure really count because aren't you supposed to know everything about your best friend? The only thins she can remember is that he had a crescent shaped birthmark on his shoulder and that he hadn't liked orange juice.

Still, Anna smiles at him. "Wow, I hadn't recognized you! How've you been?"

Nolan is suddenly hugging her tightly and she stiffens in the embrace instinctively. She hasn't been touched affectionately like that since the Desians took her and as much as she's come to enjoy living with Kratos and Yuan, (Even if Yuan only lives there technically, since he spends most of his days and nights at the base) they're not the kind of people that touch a lot.

Nolan smells of summer leaves and cinnamon and Anna relaxes a little into the embrace, but steps away from it because, as she told Kratos in Palmacosta, she thinks she's forgotten how to interact with anyone except angels with odd senses of justice.

Nolan doesn't comment on her stepping away, but he reaches out a hand to touch her hair. "When did you go blonde?" He asks, still smiling.

Anna shrugs a little. She can't tell him the truth, even as tired as she of keeping this secret. "Felt like a change."

She wonders why he isn't thinking this is some kind of miracle that she's back after eight years, but then she remembers that he'd been visiting his cousins in Asgard when she'd been taken away. No one must have told him the truth about what had happened to her.

"That's certainly a change. How was school and living with your aunt in Palmacosta?" He asks, stuffing a hand in his pocket as he takes a slice of pear.

So that had been the lie. The only time Anna had ever been in Palmacosta was when she'd been living with Kratos and Yuan and she thinks it's ironic that she'd only lived there up until two months ago.

"It was great." Anna says, smiling in a way that was almost real. Something about Nolan is familiar and comforting, but that was to the old Anna. The new Anna is harder and a little broken in all the wrong places, so they don't fit together the way she thinks they used to. "I loved Palmacosta. Compared to here…especially at night…it's like an ocean of light."

"So, why are you back here then if you loved it so much?"

"Well, you know what they say. No place like home." Except Luin wasn't quite home anymore because she wasn't the person she used to be. "But I wanna know what's been going on with you. You have a daughter?"

Nolan beamed proudly and pulled out his wallet, showing her the picture inside. The little girl, no more than two, was hanging onto what could only be her mother's hand. They looked alike; the same strawberry blonde hair, the same hazel eyes. But the girl had Nolan's smile.

"Her name's Abby. Well, Abigail, but I told my wife that that sounds too grown up for her right now. Do you remember Celeste? She went to school with us."

Anna doesn't remember anything. "Yeah, of course! How'd you two end up together?"

Nolan frowned playfully at her. "Always the tone of surprise. It was…five years ago and there was a bit of alcohol involved, so I spilled all that I'd been feeling about her for years."

Anna arched her eyebrows. "How romantic."

"You clearly haven't lost your touch for sarcasm."

Anna can't remember her old self having any sarcasm, but she thinks Yuan's been an influence on her. Whether that influence was good or bad, she'd yet to decide.

The door opened and Anna turned instinctively, though she already knew the sound of Kratos' footsteps. Kratos closed the door behind him and looked at Anna. "I'm sorry, I wasn't aware that you had company."

Anna knew that she had to give Nolan a reason she was living with a man, two half the time. Remembering the lie that she and Kratos had been using since before they went to Palmacosta, she smiled and said to Nolan, "Nolan, this is my husband, Amar."

Kratos glanced at her, then glanced back to the other man before holding his hand out. "Pleasure to meet you."

Nolan shook his hand. "Same to you. Amar…that's an unusual name."

"I am from the Triet region originally."

"Really? Then how did you and Anna end up together?"

Kratos made a mental note to ask Anna just how he knew her real name. "He went to Palmacosta for his studies, just like I did. I asked him out for coffee after class one day and he agreed."

"I see. Then let me offer my belated congratulations then. I wonder if you two would join me, Celeste, and Abby for dinner tomorrow night?"

Anna met Kratos' eyes from behind Nolan's back. Kratos sighed mentally a little. Anna had been more or less isolated in Luin. She couldn't talk to many people since they might recognize her, even with the blonde hair. And since, apparently, Nolan already knew about Anna, it couldn't do much more damage.

"It would be an honor to dine with you and your family."

"Great! How's seven o'clock?"

"It…works great."

"I'll see you both tomorrow then. I'm sorry, but I have to get going. I have a delivery to make in Hima."

Kratos waits until he hears Nolan's footsteps fade before saying, "You're quite the accomplished liar. Except for the part about his knowing your name."

"Relax, Kratos. He doesn't know anything about the ranch." Anna hesitated for a minute, sitting on the bed and sinking into it a little. "…He used to be my best friend."

"The one who lived next door that had the pear tree?"

"Yeah." Anna chuckled a little. It sounded bitter to her own ears. "…I forgot him. How could I have done that? I forgot my own best friend."

Kratos sat beside her. "Things change."

"He didn't even know what had happened to me. Someone, I'm assuming it was my mother, told him that I was going to school in Palmacosta. This doesn't feel right, Kratos. It feels like time stopped for me when I was in that cell and-and to see everyone else going on with life, getting married, having kids…it hurts." Anna looked over at him, brown eyes looking terribly broken. "I guess I don't have to tell you that, do I?"

No, she didn't. Kratos had seen it happen for four thousand years. But he still remembers sitting on a low garden wall when Meltokio was still being built up and seeing their friends from the military, with their hair now streaked heavily with gray and laughing as their children and grandchildren hugged them.

"…Does it ever get easier?" Anna asks.

"...No."

Anna chuckled again and she knew it wasn't a happy sound. She wondered whether she would have preferred Kratos to lie to her. She knew that him lying to her wouldn't have been likely, but she knew it would have hurt less. Or, she thought it would have.

"We do not have to go to dinner tomorrow if you don't want to." Kratos told her. He wasn't sure how to handle something like this. Anna wasn't crying. He hadn't seen her cry once in the time they'd known each other, but he knew that everyone had a breaking point and he wasn't sure he would know what to do if Anna reached that point.

"I do want to go. I just know that it'll hurt if I do."

"But it might help as well."

Anna leaned back on her arms, letting out a deep breath. "Y'know, just because I'm going doesn't mean you have to. I can invent something."

"I'm sure you can. I think that the one thing any of us _are _sure about is the fact that you're an excellent liar when you have to be."

A laugh trickled from Anna's lips. It sounded better to both of them, nothing broken in it. "That still doesn't answer the question."

"I wasn't aware that there had been a question asked."

"You know what I mean. Are you going to dinner tomorrow night?"

"…Is his wife a decent cook?"

"You are such an ass sometimes, you know that?"

Kratos blinked at her. "What?"

"Why is it that the wife has to be the one cooking? He might know how. Maybe they both cook." Anna knows it's not really Kratos' fault. He was born in an age where women were mostly in the kitchen and taking care of children or doing laundry. But he'd been alive for four thousand years and she knew times had changed. It was time Kratos learned that women could do anything they wanted to.

And it was fun to argue with him.

"…I'll go." He says finally.

She laughed again and wonders why he makes it so easy. Kratos is a fair serious man, but she couldn't stop smiling around him.

-/-/-/-

Nolan isn't sure why, but something felt off about Amar. He was a quiet man, but clearly intelligent. He seemed uncomfortable when Abby had run up to the guests, hugging them around the legs. Celeste had had to scoop their daughter up, propping her on her hip and greet the guests before Amar relaxed.

And Anna…something was different about Anna. Was that what big cities did to people? Her cheeks were a little hollow and her skin paler than he remembered. She grinned less and her smiles had a subtler, softer edge. And her eyes were darker. Not in color, but in just the way she looked around his house and the way she watched him when Abby sat on his lap. But they lightened when she spoke to Amar and they had a short banter that Nolan can't begin to understand.

And then there's the fact that neither Amar nor Anna has a ring on their left hand. Anna had introduced him as her husband, but Nolan had a feeling that that couldn't be all of it. Then again, it could be a big city thing. She had been living in Palmacosta for eight years after all.

They bid their good byes and good nights and Nolan still can't shake the feeling that there's something off about that man.


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Been watching a lot of Castle, White Collar and Psych. Seems like my police show obsession is back, if only for a short while

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/

_We choose those we like; with those we love, we have no say in the matter. ~Mignon McLaughlin,_ _**The**__**Neurotic's**__**Notebook**_, _**1960**_

-/-/

"Yuan."

The half-elf turned to the speaker, hands in his pockets for some attempt at calm. He isn't sure when hearing Yggdrasill's voice made his hackles rise, but he learned long ago to trust his instincts and right now his instincts were sending up faint warning signals.

"Yggdrasill. To what do I owe this pleasure?"

"Did you get my message? About Kratos?"

"I did. Has he truly betrayed us?"

"He has." Yggdrasill confirmed. "But there hasn't been any sign of him since he escaped the ranch with the experiment. I was curious if you'd seen him. You were still in contact with him, were you not?"

"I was, but I haven't heard anything of him for nearly half a year. Are you sure that Kvar doesn't have something to do with this?"

The pale pale blue eyes flicked over to Yuan. "What do you mean?"

"Well, all of the prisoner escapes have been under Kvar's watch, haven't they? He could be the traitor and is framing Kratos."

"An interesting point, but if Kratos was innocent, why does he refuse to show his face?"

Yuan lifted and dropped his shoulders in a shrug. "I've no idea. Perhaps he isn't sure how he'd be received. And Kratos has been loyal to Cruxis since its inception. Why betray us now, when we're stronger than we've ever been?"

"You make an excellent argument, but Kvar is aware of our strength. What reason has he to betray us?"

"There have been a few rumors about a rebel organization." Yuan knows he has to tread cautiously on this ground. Well, more cautiously. He can't sound too sure of the organization or else he would be suspected and he couldn't sound too against it at the same time. "He could be a part of them."

"What's this about a rebel organization and why didn't you bring it to my attention sooner?"

"I wished to confirm to rumors before troubling you with it. But there is no solid origin for the talks. Mostly it's just housewives and barkeep talk, but the talk has to begin somewhere. If there is a rebel organization, they are proving difficult to track down."

"I see. I want you to find this organization, if it exists, and see if you can't get Kratos out of whatever hole he's hidden himself in. I wish to speak with him."

"Yessir." Yuan adds a lazy salute that Yggdrasill glares at him for because Yuan knows full well that Mithos hates any reminder of the days before Martel, but Yuan thinks that he needs the reminder because if Mithos were to forget why he'd begun all these millennia of sorrow, then the true madness would begin.

-/-/-/-

"Welcome back." Anna greets, tugging a brush through her tangled hair before bed. "This is a rather late call, even by your standards."

"Had some news I thought he'd like to hear as soon as possible." Yuan told her, unbuckling his cape and laying it over the back of the rocking chair. "He's taking a shower?"

Anna nodded and found that she wasn't the least bit surprised that Yuan strode to the bathroom, turned the doorknob and let himself inside.

Kratos turned to Yuan's familiar footsteps. "You could have waited until I was done."

Yuan gently moved the shower curtain aside. He wanted to see Kratos' reaction to the news and he pushed himself up to sit beside the sink. "I didn't want Anna any deeper into all this than she needs to be."

The human didn't flinch at being revealed to Yuan. It wasn't as though either of them hadn't seen the other bare before. "Such kindness from you. And you tell me I'm the one growing soft?"

"The curse of growing old. I was told some interesting things today."

Kratos lathered shampoo into his shorter hair. He still wasn't accustomed to it. "I assume you paid a visit to Derris-Kharlan?"

"I did. And our dear and fluffy lord wants me to dig you out of your hidey-hole."

"Did he happen to mention why?"

"I might have managed to convince him that Kvar framed you. He didn't say why specifically, but I don't think he'll gut you at the door."

Kratos looked at Yuan. The half-elf had risked his own safety and that of his rebels to clear the air for him. Kratos wonders sometimes what he'd done to deserve that kind of loyalty. "How did you manage that?"

Yuan flashed him a smile. "How long will it take you to learn that I have some charm of my own?"

"Perhaps it's because I know you so well that I find that hard to believe." Kratos tilted his head back beneath the spray of water, washing out the shampoo.

"Also, I'm thinking that I need a name for my people."

"I can see why. 'The rebel half-elven army against Cruxis and all it stands for' is a mouthful."

"I was curious if you, with your love of words and languages, had any ideas."

"Off the top of my head?" Kratos turned off the water and took the towel Yuan held out to him with a wordless thanks as he stepped out of the shower. "Nothing comes to mind. "I'd say deserters, but you're the only one that was actually part of Cruxis before creating this army of yours."

"It could be ironic. We do live in the desert after all."

"…Turncoats?"

"We don't have any coats to turn. It's too hot for that."

"You have no sense of the metaphorical." Kratos toweled his hair dry. "I believe that we'll need to get more hair dye soon."

Yuan leaned forward when Kratos held out the towel for inspection. There was dark brown ink in splotches across the towel. The half-elf glanced up at Kratos and could see that Kratos' natural auburn color showed a little at the roots.

"I do believe that you're right. No other suggestions for a name?"

"I'll get back to you."

The door clicked open and both men turned to the door. "Hey, guys…dah…"Anna turned away quickly from the nude man standing in her bathroom.

"You didn't think to knock?" Yuan inquired.

"I heard you two talking, so I'd assumed he was done. Anyway, Nolan just came by with some news."

Yuan turned to Kratos. The human waved away the unasked question. "And that news was…?"

"He says that his cousins in Asgard just sent a letter. Apparently, the Desians are looking for people of Kratos' and my description and they're sending a search party here. Supposedly, Kvar's a part of them."

"That has to be a rumor." Yuan disagreed. "Kvar wouldn't come when he's under so much heat from Yggdrasill for letting his prisoners escape."

"But that very same situation could drive him to desperation." Kratos pointed out, beginning to dress.

"I'll get back to the base, see if they've dug up any information on this…I _just _thought of something."

Anna glanced quickly to make sure she wasn't about to get another eyeful of Kratos (Not that he wasn't nice to look at, but it was still _Kratos_) before turning around completely. "And that something is?"  
Yuan met Kratos' eyes. "I can't bring you back to Yggdrasill looking like that."

"My hair is not going to grow back anytime soon." When they'd become angels, Kratos found himself needing to shave less and less often until he'd stopped having to entirely. For most likely the same reason that gave him his unruly hair, his actual hair never stopped growing, but it had grown more slowly after the angel transformation.

"Then I'd say it's a good thing that Yggdrasill overestimates you sometimes. You'll just have to keep getting away from me when I search for you."

"If that's going to be the case, we can't stay here. I can't keep my cover here."  
"You can't keep a cover anywhere in Sylvarant now. The Desians know your face."

"Isn't it possible to go to Tethe'alla?" Anna suggested. "There aren't any Desians there, right?"

"It is possible, but right now, the only way to get there is through the Tower of Salvation, which leads to Derris-Kharlan. It's too dangerous to go through that route."

"So there is no other way?"

"No. I've been working on some way to anchor the base to be able to go through the dimensional fissure so that it could connect to Tethe'alla, but it's still not functional."

"Then what's the plan?"

"The only places not regularly bothered by Desians are Iselia and Triet and they're constantly checking on Iselia."

Anna frowned. "Why? Iselia isn't that big a town."

"It's where Sylvarant's next Chosen is going to be born." Kratos told her.

With that one sentence, Anna is reminded of everything thing they've done and the weight of knowing that that person, whoever it was, was going to go through terrible trials and pain, only to die at the end for a regeneration that wasn't a regeneration nearly crushes her.

"They keep tabs on the town?"

Yuan nodded. "Naturally. Iselia has a non-aggression treaty with Forcystus, the head of the ranch in that area. Forcystus mostly polices the area, but his ranch is usually used for transfers or for the prisoners who've been deemed most troublesome. If the Desians ever got you back, that's probably where you'd be headed because that way, even if you did escape, you'd still have to go through the desert to go anywhere and not many people live through the desert."

"Triet's really the only option?"

"It might not even be an option if Forcystus is looking for you." Yuan crosses the room, buckling on his traveling cloak. "I'll go see him tomorrow and I'll ask Botta if he's made any progress on the inter-dimensional travel."

"Drink some coffee." Kratos suggested as Yuan opened the door. "You need it."

After the door shuts, Anna looks back to Kratos. "We're definitely not staying in Luin, then?" Kratos shook his head. "Just when I was getting used to being back home."

Kratos wants to tell her that she'll be able to live in Luin honestly and in the open one day, but he doesn't like making promises that he's not sure he can keep.

-/-/-/-

"It's not often that I am graced by your presence." Forcystus knows little about the blue-haired seraphim that's currently standing in his office as though he'd been there a thousand times before. Yuan doesn't work with the Desians as often as Kratos does. Did.

"I though I should remedy that." Yuan says easily. He knows as much about Forcystus as the Desian knows about him, but that was because Yuan was usually the one dealing with the politics in Tethe'alla. According to Mithos, Yuan could convince anyone of anything and Kratos, however diplomatic the man could be, he hated mingling with the nobles. "Of the Grand Cardinals, you're not as…slimy…as the others."

"You have such faith in us." Forcystus says dryly. He agrees though. Kvar and Rodyle, especially, are sick.

"Clearly. Have you heard about Kratos?"

"I haven't spoken to him for many months. What about him?"

"He's betrayed us, or that's the story going around. I don't believe that."  
Forcystus meets Yuan's eyes steadily. "We like to believe that of our friends."

"We _were_ friends, but that was once upon a time. Now, we're merely comrades. But that isn't why I don't believe the rumor. If there is one thing I know, it is that Kratos is no fool. If he were to betray us, he wouldn't do it so obviously and I doubt we'd catch him in the act. I believe he was framed."

"Who would be foolish enough to attempt to frame one of the four Seraphim?"

"It's foolish, certainly, but perhaps it was something closer to arrogance that led the person to do it."

"You don't think _I_ did it?"

Yuan waves down the protests. "No, no. Of course not. You're intelligent, Forcystus, but you're an honest man. The person that I think it was is not quite so honest."

Forcystus ran through a mental list. "Rodyle is not yet powerful enough to attempt something on this kind of scale and Magnius wouldn't dare try it. You think it's Kvar?"

"It certainly fits, doesn't it? The escaped prisoners were all from his ranch. You know how careful Kvar is. He wouldn't have let them escape if he didn't have a reason."

"Kratos hasn't been anywhere near Cruxis lately. Innocent people don't run."

"Innocent people who have Yggdrasill for a leader do. I agree that he's an excellent leader, but he doesn't have the best of tempers. Especially not for traitors, even supposed ones."

"If it is Kvar, he can't be doing this alone."

"No, he can't. And if the rumors I've heard are true, he isn't. There's been some talk about a rebel organization."

"How did they find out about Cruxis?"

"That's not my area of concern. I was ordered to find Kratos and this organization, but Kratos won't poke his head out if Desians are constantly running through every town. He's too careful for that."

"So you want me to ease down on my patrols?"

"If you're patrolling as much as the others are, yes."

"I do an inspection through Triet every few weeks and check on Iselia every now and then."

"Well, you're not paranoid."

"I also don't have as large an area."

"Magnius only has one city to watch. Rodyle has none." Forcystus pointed out.

"That's because it takes the both of them to watch Palmacosta. It's a big city, for Sylvarant. And Magnius is too hot-headed to watch it alone. He'd likely burn it down if he didn't have Rodyle telling him the advantages of keeping the port city in one piece."  
"Such a high opinion of both of them."

"They've yet to prove themselves worthy of a high opinion. Are you willing to pull your troops out of Triet, since I'm fairly certain that that's where he's hiding out."

"There's no guarantee he's in Sylvarant."

"To the contrary. He couldn't get to Tethe'alla without going through Derris-Kharlan and therefore getting himself seen.'

"I'm more than willing to assist you, but can you handle overseeing Triet by yourself?"

"Don't concern yourself. I'll be fine. Ah, and could you keep an ear out for the rumors about those rebels?"

"Of course. Thank you for coming, Lord Yuan."

-/-/-/-

"Sir, our information tells us that Forcystus has changed the schedule for his inspections of Triet."

"I know, Botta." Yuan is tapping away at the keys of a computer, back to the door.

"Do you know the reasoning behind that? He shouldn't have had any reason to do it. He could be planning something."

"You've got the wrong culprit, Botta." At his second-in-command furrowed his brows in confusion, Yuan explained, "I'm the one who's planning something. Forcystus pulled his troops back because I convinced him to."

"I had pinned Forcystus as rather smart, so how is it that you, of all people, convinced him?"

"That hurts, Botta." Yuan says mildly. "You don't think I can be charming?"

"I don't think you can be diplomatic enough to do it and I didn't think you particularly enjoyed Cruxis' political struggles."

"I don't, but that doesn't mean that I'm not good at twisting them to my advantage. Has there been any progress on the inter-dimensional transfer technology?"

"On the technology itself, no. But I did notice something." Botta beckons Yuan to the top of a computer, the only clear space in the room.

Yuan leans closer to see the sketch that Botta had rolled out. "What is that?"

"That is a rough idea for a vehicle to be able to go through the dimensional barrier."

The machine looked vaguely like a mixture of a dragon, a seabird and a jet-ski. Yuan skimmed the labels and the crossed out theories. "The idea is sound, but for them to be able to cross the dimensional barrier, the technology still needs to be functional."

"This isn't all of the idea, sir."

"Then by all means, continue."

"The Towers of Salvation are at the center of both worlds, correct?" Yuan nodded. "They're only able to cross the barrier because they're at each others poles, thereby creating a link for the energy transfer to go through."

"I'm not sure I understand where you're going with this."

"Do you have a map of the world before it was separated?"  
"Not with me at the moment. Why?"

"Because I believe that the inter-dimensional technology needs that link between the poles. If we can figure out where the opposite pole from this base is…"

"Then the technology would work. Botta, you're brilliant. Have I ever told you that?"

"No sir." Yuan is standing and retrieving his travelling cloak, but Botta calls him back.

"What?"

"Sit and breathe for a minute. You need coffee."

Yuan obeys and thanks Botta for the mug that's held out to him. In some ways, Yuan muses, Kratos and Botta were rather alike. Especially in the way that they both knew him far too well. But Kratos knows him in the way that old friends know each other, the way that they know when the other is about to do something stupid and they warn them, but let them do it anyway because they know that they'll catch them when they come falling down.

-/-/-/-

"Triet is safe."

"Hello to you too." Anna says to Yuan as he steals a roll from her plate. She knows he doesn't need to eat and wonders why he still does. They can't taste after all. But the one time she asked, neither of the men answered because it was a _personal_ question.

"How'd you manage to make Triet safe?"

"I dazzled Forcystus with my charm and wit." Yuan said, sitting beside Kratos and splitting the roll in half automatically, handing one half to him.

"I'm sure. He's pulled out all of his troops?"

"Yes. And would you happen to know where the map of the world went?"

"Our world?" The one that was still whole before Mithos Yggdrasill went mad.

"The very same."

"It should still be in my room in Derris-Kharlan."

"I'll be sure to head there soon, assuming it hasn't been plundered and pillaged." Yuan was about to say more but both he and Kratos stilled, like a dog scenting a rabbit, when they heard the stomping of boots.

Then there was pounding on the door and their heads all whipped towards the sound. "Open up! This is a Desian inspection!"  
They were all on their feet in an instant. "Go out through the bathroom window." Yuan told them. "I can buy you some time."

"There's Desians all over town." Kratos told him. "We'll be seen."

"Just blend in with the crowd. Go hide in the inn like the other civilians."

Kratos wanted to argue the point more, but knew that there was no time. He hurried Anna into the bathroom and helped her out the window.

"The only thing I can reach is the lake." Anna hissed. "We'll stick out if we're soaked."

"Just jump. Trust me."

Anna doesn't know why she trusts Kratos as much as she does after all he's done. But perhaps that's why she does trust him because he's helping her, after being part of a war and twisting the world out of shape. He's helping her and expecting nothing back.

The water is cool when she hits it. She'd expected it to be colder, but she'd forgotten how much the summer sun could heat up the water. Her body and mind remembered swimming in this lake as a child and she strokes out for the small pier near the chapel, hearing the splash of Kratos hitting the water. But her muscles hadn't built up enough for her to continue swimming for so long and it had been years since she'd swam in anything…

A sudden warm arm around her waist made Anna look around, focusing immediately on Kratos' face, water dripping from the ends of his shortened hair. "Are you alright?" He asked, still helping her keep afloat.

"Tired." Anna panted.

Kratos understood immediately. Tightening his grip on her waist, he helped her swim to the small pier. Anna manages to climb up onto the warm wood with a push from Kratos, who's beside her in the next minute.

"We're still soaked." Anna tells him, trying to catch her breath. "Got a plan?"

Kratos puts a hand on her arm and she feels warmth spread through her. When they're both dry, Kratos tugs her to her feet. Anna stops Kratos as he begins running to the inn.

"What?" He asks.

Anna nods to the inn's front door. "The Desians are already checking the inn. If we come in now, we'll look suspicious."

Kratos looked around and spotted a door to one of the houses, most likely left open from the inhabitants running to the inn. "Follow me."

"They're going to search." Anna tells him, slamming the door shut behind them.

Kratos looked around, seeking for something that would hide them. "Come, behind here." He said, gesturing towards a screen that was most likely used for changing behind.

"That's not going to hide us." Anna said, but obeyed anyway. "That thing's half-transparent."

"Do you trust me?"

Anna didn't miss a beat. "You know I do."

"Then get back here."

Anna came behind the screen as they heard the door slamming open and Kratos gently pushed her against the wall. "Forgive me, but this needs to be convincing." He whispered, left hand cradling her unhurt cheek. Kratos leaned in, pressing his lips against hers, his shadow drenching the both of them in the screen.

"Pervert." Anna murmured against his lips. It wasn't totally true, as Kratos wasn't actually crossing any lines. He was very warm and Anna wondered whether it was because she'd just recently been quite soaked or because he was normally like that.

The screen was ripped aside, wood clattering against the wall. They broke apart, but Kratos leaned in closer, shielding her from view. Before the Desian, who still had a hand on the edge of the screen, could say anything, another voice broke through.

"What is going on here?" Yuan asked loudly, striding into the room, his cloak whipping behind him and eyes blazing. Anna had never really seen him in any position of authority, but seeing him now, he looked intimidating and every bit the warrior he must have been during the war.

Immediately, all of the Desians leapt to attention. "Lord Yuan, sir! I-It's just a routine inspection to s-search for the experiment and her accomplice."

"All of this ruckus will just scare them both out and make this whole thing start all over again. Lieutenant, get your men out of here and give this message to Kvar: Stop raiding the towns because it makes the work twice as hard. Is that understood?"

"Yessir!"

"Then get out of here."

Anna and Kratos look at each other and Kratos fights down the embarrassment. _Lord_ Yuan…why hadn't he thought of that?

Yuan smirks. "Hey, Kratos?"

"What?"

"I told you so."

_You're going soft._

-/-/-/

Anna is sleeping inside when Yuan comes to stand beside Kratos where he sat with his legs hanging off of the edge of the boat. Neither would deny that the view was lovely. The lantern-light from the street reflecting into the lake and mixing with the moon's light, the stars speckled across the night sky.

But when they look at the beauty at times like this, they can still see the taint of Yggdrasill and of the war. Can see things die before their eyes, like the leaves on the tree and the stray cat roaming the streets because Time had long ago left them behind and now all they can watch.

"You're getting in too deep." Yuan tells him.

"I know that, Yuan."

The half-elf continued like he hadn't heard him. "You're past going soft now. You actually care, like, care-care about here, don't you? You wouldn't have pulled that stunt otherwise. You would've come up with a different plan or fought your way out. But she's changing you."

"Yuan," Kratos interrupted. "I know all that, believe me."

Yuan finally looks down at his best friend. "And you're not doing anything to stop it."

"I'm doing everything I can to stop it and still have her trust me. We have to keep her safe, Yuan, or else Yggdrasill's reign will be strengthened more because of the Angelus Project. We need to get the Exsphere away from her."

"I'm still working on finding a dwarf not with Yggdrasill. But that's beside the point right now, Kratos."

"I'm not discussing this anymore." Kratos warned.

"Yes, you are. She reminds you, doesn't she? Of Before?"

"It isn't difficult to do that, Yuan."

"So you say, but I know you better than that. And now that I think on it, you never answered my question. Are you willing to risk your life for Anna?"

"I told you that I'd answer that when you did."

"I'm answering it now. I would, because I think that this is all bigger than just us, bigger than just Mithos and reviving Martel. It's about all of those people, Kratos. They deserve to be able to lead their own lives without 'divine' interference. What's your answer, Kratos?"

"I've already proved that I'm willing to risk my reputation, my own freedom."

"That isn't what I asked. Your life, Kratos."

"Alright, yes. Yes, I am willing to risk my life for her. Heaven only knows why."

Yuan chuckles and sits by his friend. Sitting like this, they're the same height and there is a line of touch running through their bodies, from shoulder to elbow to hips to thighs to knees. Yuan doesn't say any thing more, just sits with Kratos and watches the stars wheeling above them, the one thing that hadn't changed in four thousand years.


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Finally beat the scythe and umbrella chicks in Arc Rise Fantasia. God, I hated them. And I met the thief/pirate, Serge. I like him. So far, he and Niko are tied for the title of Favorite Character. :)

Saw the Sorcerer's Apprentice and loved it. They did a fantastic job.

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/

_"A lady always makes a man want to be better than he is."-Truth __**(The Harlequin)**_

-/-/

"What are you doing here?"

Yuan stilled and looked over his shoulder at Yggdrasill, but it hadn't sounded like Yggdrasill. The voice hadn't been velvety and cold, but much closer to Mithos' tone of surprise.

"What's it look like I'm doing?" Yuan asked, continuing to search in Kratos' desk drawers.

"Alright, I asked the wrong question. Why are you here?" Yuan wanted very badly to ask Yggdrasill that question, but he had a feeling that he didn't quite want to know the answer. "You're supposed to be finding Kratos."

"This is part of the process. I nearly had him in Luin, but then Kvar's soldiers decided to raid the town—rather conveniently, by the way, seeing as how Kratos could make his whole story fall apart—and he got away. I figured I should check into his things, see if there were any clues to places he might go."

"'If your quarry goes to ground, leave no ground to go to.'"

"I'm not burning every city in Sylvarant to the ground, Yggdrasill. Too much paperwork and I have plenty to do already."

"That's because you've gotten lazy."

"Well, I do have all the time in the world to do it." Yuan sat back in Kratos' chair, making the mental note to steal it for his office at the base. It wasn't as though Kratos was going to use it any time soon anyway. "Nothing at his desk."

"I don't see why you thought there would be. Kratos is a careful man."

"That he is. And almost horrifyingly neat." But that was to be expected of a man raised with a general for a father and who'd spent much of his adult life (before the angel transformation, obviously) in the military.

"Did you expect something different?"

"No. It's just that the extent of the neatness never fails to surprise me."

Yggdrasill—Yuan knows that it's not Mithos, not quite, though today is one of the saner days—hums in acknowledgement. There is no sound to accompany his leaving and Yuan is sure that, if he hadn't been looking at the boymanangel, he would never have seen him exit the room.

Yuan counts slowly to thirty before standing and walking to Kratos' bookshelves to where he knew Kratos kept the maps. He'd known that he'd be seen coming into Derris-Kharlan and that Yggdrasill would have been notified. It had just been a matter of buying time until then.

Yuan unrolled the map to check it was the one of their world, the one they'd traveled so extensively before it had been twisted and broken, before slipping it into his sleeve.

-/-/-/-

"The dye is really starting to come out." Anna commented one morning as Kratos was sitting up. She didn't want to call it waking up because angels couldn't sleep, but he was coming to full consciousness, so she supposed it worked. The auburn was becoming much more like streaks rather than just showing at the roots.

"We'll need to get going for Triet soon." He said, ruffling Noishe's fur as he stood. "This area is too dangerous."

Anna arched her eyebrows and Kratos knew that she'd known Yuan too long already. "I thought that with that fantastic hearing of yours that you would've heard Yuan telling off those Desians last week during the inspection. I don't think they're willing to risk his wrath."

Kratos smiled briefly. Very rarely did true rage come over Yuan. Most of his vengeances were through subtle pranks that he watched from a difference. "I heard. But that won't stop Kvar. He's invested eight years on the Angelus Project. He won't let it go so easily."

Anna glanced down at her left hand. "So…this angel process…how long does it take anyway?"

"That depends. Usually, it takes a few years. But we don't know what Kvar did to you."

"What's life without being able to…y'know, enjoy the little things? The things we take for granted, but then they're gone and then…"

Kratos doesn't need her to finish. He's experienced it all and wishes that he'd savored the tang of oranges and the familiar taste of beef and rice before the transformation because now, all he could taste was the mere shadow of food and what was a shadow compared to the real thing?

Noishe raised his head, ears upright and body alert. Immediately, Kratos' eyes searched out the door and Anna went still. A knock came through the door before it opened, a large hand poking inside and waving.

"I'd prefer not to be skewered when I walk in, Kratos." The next minute, the door is open and Botta is standing in their living room.

"What's wrong?"

"We've managed to get a pair of horses for you two to get to Triet, along with some travel papers, but we need to be going if we want to get out of the area before dark."

"What's happened to make the decision so suddenly?" Anna asks.

"Apparently Yggdrasill doesn't entirely believe Yuan's story. He's sending Rodyle in to inspect Luin."

"That also means that he believes Yuan at least in part, otherwise he would have sent Kvar. He's being unusually cautious."

"Is there any reason that you can think of for that?" Botta asks, crossing his arms.

"It's most likely because the parents of Sylvarant's next Chosen are due to be married soon. They're the closest match to Martel's mana signature yet. It's making him a little nervous."

Anna knows that Kratos regrets his part in Cruxis, but she doesn't think she'll ever become accustomed to speaking so casually about controlling people's lives. It's not natural.

But as much as she doesn't like it, it's who Kratos has been for four thousand years and her mother had taught her that it was useless to attempt to change a man and they'd only hate you for it._ (At least, she thinks it's her mother. Could she really have forgotten the way that her own mother smiled, or the way she moved and gestured when she talked?)_

"Yggdrasill being nervous doesn't strike me as a good thing." She says.

"It isn't. But there is a good side to that. It means Yggdrasill will be more likely to make mistakes."

Anna tilted her head curiously at him. "Huh. Never saw you as optimistic, Kratos. You always struck me as the guy that always saw the cloud, not the silver lining."

He glances at her briefly and Anna thinks that Kratos was a natural optimist, but something, perhaps Time, maybe experience, had scratched and whittled that optimism down to nearly a splinter, until the optimism couldn't show its head unless the moment was opportunistic.

"We can discuss the little details at the base." Botta says. "Let's go."

-/-/-/-

Yuan is behind his desk when they arrive. He drags a hand through his hair, leaving streaks of black and dark blue ink. Kratos had seen him in this kind of mood much more often in the past few months than he had in the past millennium., so he simply sets down their bags and sits in one of the chairs in front of the desk. Anna mimics him and Noishe pads around the desk to rest his head in Yuan's lap.

That's what makes Yuan look down and then up at Kratos and Anna. "You two are already here?"  
"It's nearly full dark. When was the last time you checked the time?" Kratos asks. He knows Yuan's tendency to bury himself in his work.

"Full dark? The last time I got up from this desk was to get a coffee and that wasn't too long after lunch."

"You're telling me that you haven't eaten for nearly seven hours?" Kratos knows that they've both gone without eating for much much longer, but it was the principle of the thing.

Yuan frowned a little. "You sound like Botta."

"Technically, he sounds like me." Because Kratos had been born long before and he and Yuan had been friends for millennia before Botta had even been a thought in his grandfather's mind.

"He's got a point there, sir." Botta said as he came in the room. "And Doria asked me to pass along the message that, under no circumstances, will you be getting any of today's leftovers seeing as how you chose to lock yourself away in your office and starve yourself. All of the leftovers are being offered to the guests…including Noishe."

The protozoan lifts his head at the mention of his name and is immediately at Botta's feet, tail swishing back and forth with a low whine slipping from between his teeth. Botta sighs and opens the door so that Noishe can go through, following the creature shortly after.

"Well at least someone has the heart to punish you for having your sudden workaholic streaks. Which this one was inspired by…what, exactly?" Kratos stands and moves until he's standing just behind Yuan to see what was on his desk.

"It's for the interdimensional transfer system. Botta helped me figure it out. It's the old theory about the poles, but mixed with some technology and some magic, it can work."

Kratos studied the diagrams and map in front of him. "You're planning to make another base in Tethe'alla for the purpose of the transfer?"

"Yes."  
Kratos traced a carefully straight line leading from the desert to the other side of the world. "You're positive that this is where the opposite pole is?"

"We did a holographic model of our world to double-check."

"You do realize that the opposite pole is on the Flanoir continent? Surrounded by water and snow and ice? You'd have to take a boat every time that you wished to go there. The winds there are too rough to fly."

"I'm well aware, Kratos." Yuan said darkly. "And let me remind you that the entire idea of building the base in the Triet desert was all _yours_. It was your brilliant plan."

"Did you have a better plan?" Kratos said.

"Had I known that to get the interdimensional transfer technology working, I would have to build a base in the frozen hell that is Flanoir, I would've thought up a better one."

Personally, Kratos didn't think that Flanoir was such a bad city or continent. But then, he had a better tolerance for the cold and for boats. And he'd always liked the snow. But he knew that while the conditions had been harsh here, they would be doubly so in Flanoir.

"What's Flanoir?" Anna asked, curious.

"It's a city in Tethe'alla. It's always snowing there." Yuan told her.

"You make it sound miserable."

"It's because he hates the place." Kratos said.

"I hate the cold, not the place." Yuan corrected. "Flanoir is actually quite a beautiful city. And they have fantastic hot chocolate."

"And you're going to build this base in the middle of what, to my understanding, is a frozen wasteland?"

"I don't want to, but it has to be done. Though now that I think on it, some of Exire's people might want to join. And there must be half-elves in Ozette that aren't content with their situation."

"You're going to have to sneak the materials to build another base by Yggdrasill again. He won't be able to miss all those 'misplaced' materials with his tetchiness."

Yuan blinked over at him. "Is it truly about that time again? Is the new Chosen going to be born so soon?"

"It's always been longer than you think."

They seem so very old at this moment that it makes Anna feel like little more than a child. Perhaps that's all she was in their eyes.

A knock on the door. "Sir?"

Yuan looked at one of his technician's children. That had been many of the half-elves' concerns when Yuan had gone recruiting. What would happen to their families? Yuan had allowed them all to stay at the base. It wasn't as though there was lack of room.

This boy—Hassan, was his name?—was just old enough to want to know what, exactly, was going on and young enough to not be told much. It was a terrible age to be. He had an unruly mop of black curls and dark brown eyes. A lot of the base's children liked to run messages for their parents. After all, there wasn't much else they could really do to help.

"Did something explode again?" Yuan asked. There had been many of that kind of mishap as everyone was learning to use magitechnology.

Hassan shook his head. "No sir. Doria says that there's a big…animal…or something in her kitchen and she can't seem to get it out. Botta told me to come get you."

"Should've known that Noishe would start some kind of trouble." Yuan said, standing and rolling his shoulders. He looked pointedly at Kratos. "You're coming too."

"And why is that?"

"Because you are Noishe's owner, person or whatever it is with you two."

"Noishe listens just as well to you as he does me."

"Then do it because Doria won't feed me, but she will you two."

"You're far too comfortable with mooching." Kratos says, but he stands anyway. "Are you hungry, Anna?"

She smiled. "Do you really need to ask?"  
"Sometimes I think your stomach is a bottomless pit." Yuan told her. His instincts were to help Anna to her feet, like males had always done when he'd been growing up, but he knew that if Anna didn't need the help, she wouldn't take it. Sometimes he wants to call her feminist, but really he wonders if the customs that he and Kratos had grown up learning weren't a bit sexist.

"You say that as if it's a bad thing."

"Just an observation."

There is a ridiculous amount of stairs and ramps throughout the base and Yuan wonders if he should invest in elevators, but then decides against it. Walking wouldn't kill any of them.

"You guys built this place from the ground up? It's like its own town." Anna asked in wonder, staring around at the blinking machines, the bright screens; at the incredibly stacks of files with mugs of coffee rested on them, at the people repairing machines that she'd never even heard of.

There were children in the mix as well, ranging from newborns to toddlers to preteens. Some of the men had a baby on one arm while the other hand was typing away. The older kids were helping to care for the younger ones and were standing by the adults, watching and learning.

"And it took weeks of working sleepless nights, let me tell you."

The further they went down, the easier it was to hear Noishe's whines. The first thing Anna saw when the door to the kitchen was pushed open was a plump woman with her hands propped on her hips and staring Noishe down.

"Doria, you can't skin him and stick him in one of your stews." Yuan tells her.

She looks up. Her eyes pass over Yuan and study both Kratos and Anna, but Anna a little more closely. "I take it he's yours then, Kratos?"

"Yes. I apologize for the inconvenience." Kratos called Noishe away from the counter. "We've been on the road for a while."

Doria appraised Noishe. "His teeth are sharp enough. Why didn't he just go find a wolf to chew on? He's certainly large enough to take one down."

"That blame rests with your leader."

Doria looked back to Yuan. "What on earth did you do?"

The half-elven seraphim looked back to his best friend. "You realize she'll never let this go?"  
"Good." Kratos replied. "Neither have I."  
Anna's stomach chose that moment to grumble lowly and instantly, every head turned towards her. Had they been human, Anna is sure they wouldn't have heard it.

Doria pushes a plate of curry into her hands. "You've been starving her." Doria accuses.

"She ate twice on the way here." Kratos refutes. "She loves to eat."

Anna glared balefully at him as she began to dig into the curry. The two times she'd eaten on the way here could hardly count as meals. She'd munched on an apple for a good portion of their journey and had made herself a small sandwich from slightly hard bread and salted ham.

"And you're looking thin yourself. Eat."

Kratos doesn't try and argue with her. He'd learned long ago that some things weren't worth fighting. Doria had convinced herself that the men of the base couldn't be trusted to look after themselves, so Doria had taken it upon herself to do it.

"You know that we've added a 'dining room'. Well, it has tables and chairs, at the very least. You should eat there."

"Do we not merit a chair in the kitchen anymore?" Yuan said, sounding a little sad. "What did we do?"

Doria shook her head. "There's no point in trying to get you all to learn proper things, is there?"

Kratos swallowed a mouthful of curry. It had to be just the right amount of spicy because he could only taste a shadow of the spice. Whenever Yuan tried to make curry, he overcompensated for their lack of taste and ended up with both of their mouths on fire. As much as Kratos might be annoyed at the time, he could never say no when Yuan suggested the idea again because it was one of the few things that they could taste at all anymore.

"It's useless to try and push a cart sideways." Kratos told Doria. It was something that Martel used to mutter when one of them was being especially stubborn.

"Besides," Yuan added. He wanted something other than the slight echo of Martel's words to fill the air. "The kitchen is where the food is."

"Four thousand years and counting and you both still think like that. I suppose there are things that boys never outgrow. And you," She rounded on Yuan. "Don't think of stealing their food. You missed dinner."

"Do I still get your fantastic nutcakes tomorrow morning?" He asked. Doria's nutcakes were sweet, even to him.

As Doria turned and began to wipe down the counters, Kratos took one more spoonful of curry before handing the plate to Yuan. It was an unspoken, automatic thing leftover from their days of travelling; just the two of them when money was tight and often, they could afford only one meal.

"Sir, did you figure out where the other ranch is going to have to be?" Botta asked.

"I did and it isn't good news for anyone."

"If it's in the middle of the ocean, I believe we can figure a way around it. Doesn't one of the Cardinals have a ranch out in the ocean?"

"Yes. On a tiny spit of land. But this is considerably worse. It's in the middle of the Flanoir continent, which is little more than a frozen wasteland."

Botta stared at his leader for a moment. "Sir, you're insane."

"I didn't choose the opposite pole."

"No sir, you didn't, but you do realize that this will be the second base that you'll have built under extreme conditions?"  
"I'm fully aware of this and I'm sure more than a few curses will be hurled in my direction for that. I'll make sure to head to Flanoir and get supplies and warm clothes for everyone. I also need to recruit more people over there. Oh, and Kratos, I'm going to need your help too. Snow is just as shifty as sand."

"What could you ever have done without me, I wonder?"

"I wouldn't have built the base smack in the middle of the desert and then we wouldn't be in this situation." Yuan says it in jest because he knows Kratos had made a good point about this being one of the safest places for the base and because he knows that, without Kratos, he would have been a slave until the end of his days. In truth, Yuan isn't sure that either of them would be who they were now without the other. Kratos had been shy when Yuan had met him all those years ago, not the quietly confident swordsman he was now.

"So, shall I tell the troops about the new base location, or do you want to do it?" Botta asked.

"I think you should do it. If I tell them, I think at least one of them will punch me out." Yuan replied. It's odd because he'd never felt quite comfortable when he was in the military. But here, it was just close enough to the military that it pushed them all towards their goal, but enough like their own hideaway town that the pressure was never suffocating.

"You're right. A black eye just wouldn't work with your complexion." Anna teased. Yuan shot her a dirty look and Anna just smiled.

-/-/-/-

"So what are you going to do?"

Kratos looked up at Yuan. He'd been undressing for bed when the half-elf had slipped in the door. "About what?"

"You kissed her. Now what?"

"It was a cover. It didn't mean anything." Kratos considered wearing a shirt to bed, as he always did, but it was far too hot here for that, even with the air conditioning.

"You can lie to yourself all you want, Kratos, but you've never been able to lie to me. You wouldn't have done it if it had meant nothing. You're not that kind of person."

"Even if you were right, I'm not going to do anything about it."

"You're a stubborn moron." Yuan told him flatly.

"So you've told me before. On multiple occasions."

"You're determined to take the worst path on this, aren't you?"

"Now I really don't know what you're talking about."

"This is something that could be good for you and you're ignoring it altogether. Why?"

"I thought you didn't approve of the idea of being involved with Anna."

Yuan leaned back against the wall. "Forgive an old man's memory, but I don't remember ever saying that. I don't like that she fogs things up when we're running a coup against the largest organization seen in four thousand years, but she's still good for you. You haven't seen yourself around her, have you?"

"Forgive me if I haven't had an out-of-body experience recently."

"You're happier around her, even if it's just a little bit. You're…" Yuan searched for a word. "You're more like the person I knew when we were teenagers. You should give this thing between you two a try."

Kratos sighed. "Hypothetically…if I was interested in her—and this is all hypothetic and if's, by the way—she wouldn't want me."

Yuan looked his friend up and down. "I don't see why not. You're handsome enough and I don't remember her punching you or pushing you away when you kissed her."

"We both know that if Anna is anything, she's practical. She allowed me to kiss her because it was necessary. That's all."  
"Excuse."

"I'll thank you to keep your opinions to yourself on this matter."

"You don't need to thank me because I'm not going to do that. You need to hear the truth, not whatever you delude yourself into thinking is the truth."

"Then we can discuss this another time."

Yuan studies his friend's face. He knows evasions when he sees them—hell, he's used enough of them—but lets it go. Pushing himself to stand upright, he bid Kratos a good night before leaving.


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **School starts in a week and some change. *sigh* And so would begin my year as a high school junior. Fun stuff. But, on the plus side, I do get to see my boys again, so that makes it better.

Am once again stuck in Arc Rise Fantasia and I think that the whole love/hate relationship with this game is going to continue for a while. But in no way can I hate the characters (Most of them) or the storyline, even though I'm mystified by most of it.

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/

_"I myself have never been able to figure out precisely what feminism is. I only know that people call me feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat or a prostitute."—Rebecca West_

-/-/

"You're an early riser." Doria observed.

Anna looks up at the woman and shrugs. "Always have been." It was the truth—Anna hadn't been able to wake up late since primary school—but that wasn't why she was awake right now. She'd woken only to stifle a scream as she remembers the dreams_ (The memories, the nightmares, the past at the ranch)_ and nearly dripping with sweat. She'd sat there, staring at the wall and watching the play of shadows make their exotic patterns.

Of course, she'd quickly grown restless and began looking for a shower—Yuan had neglected to tell her that yesterday when he'd shown her to her room. There had been a few mothers, bouncing children with wide, frightened eyes and fathers coming up the stairs holding a bottle of milk in the hallways and they'd been more than happy to point her in the direction.

As she bathed, she remembered all that she'd ever been told of half-elves. They couldn't be trusted. They were violent and too powerful. They were Desians. And yet, the more she interacts with them, she finds that those things had been exaggerated or were lies altogether.

There was no doubt that they could exceptionally powerful. Anna had seen only little demonstrations of their magic, but she was sure that those mundane things that they used magic for—heating a mug or cooling the air around them—could easily be twisted into something volatile and lethal, and yet they weren't.

But Anna had seen humans do little things that quickly became lethal as well. Breaking a loaf of bread in half when it could easily be a bone. She'd seen them do terrible things too, in the name of family and love. Weren't the half-elves doing the exact same thing?

"You lived with Yuan and Kratos?" Doria asks, putting a tray of something in the oven.

"Mmhmm. For a few months now."

"That's fortunate."

"Why say that?" Not that Anna was disagreeing, but it seemed rather odd for a complete stranger to say.

"They're good men, the both of them. Even if they are hardheaded."

Anna smiles. "That's what they usually tell me."

"How the three of you managed to live together and not kill each other, I'll never know. And more than a few of the lasses here will be a tad jealous of that. Many of the—well, they're not really all that young. They're marriageable age, but they're still not adults—they fancy Yuan and Kratos."

Anna shrugged. "They're more than welcome to fancy them all they want."

"Really? Forgive me, but I had been under the impression that you were…_involved…_ with Kratos."

Anna was sure she'd heard wrong. "Pardon? How did you get to _that _conclusion?"

"Well, when he was down here last, I asked him about you. You see, Yuan had told us about what had happened and all that you'd been through." They don't know anything about what she'd been through, Anna thinks viciously for a moment before remembering that she can't blame them. "When Kratos answered, he looked like any of the other married men here who talk of their wives. I had just assumed that you were lovers."

The only even vaguely lover-like thing that she and Kratos had done was that kiss in Luin, which Anna understood was rather necessary considering the circumstances. Though Kratos really should have thought the whole thing through, considering that Yuan was on their side.

"Not in this lifetime." Anna said. "He's…Kratos."

Doria laughed. Anna might be a grown woman, but there was still some part of a child's mind in her. "He is at that."

The door is suddenly bursting open and both women are immediately on their guard. But when a warm head burrows into Anna's lap, she shakes her head. "Noishe, you like to cause trouble, don't you?"

Doria puts a hand to her chest. Her heart was pounding and she hoped that this wouldn't be a normal morning ritual. The egg timer _dings_ and she slips on oven mitts to take the nutcakes out.

As soon as the over door opens, Noishe is darting towards the source of the warm aroma. He jerks in midair because of Anna's grip on the nape of his neck. "Honestly, Noishe. You'd think you hadn't eaten in weeks."

Doria straightens and places the hot trays on the counter. She sees the way Noishe stilled immediately with Anna's hand on him. "I was under the impression that only Kratos and Yuan could control him."

"Noishe is a fast learner." Yuan says as a greeting when he enters the kitchen. "It's dangerous to not listen to Anna."

The aforementioned woman glares at him. "Good morning to you too."

Yuan avoids the wooden spoon that he knows Doria is going to try to smack his hand with and snatches a nutcake. A month ago, Anna would have automatically warned him that it was hot and just out of the oven, but she'd quickly attuned herself to their not being able to feel things like hot and cold.

"That damned dog nearly crushed my lungs in his rush to get down here." It had been his rude awakening and he's almost sure that Kratos had let Noishe inside his room as revenge for last night's conversation. Noishe had climbed atop him, a paw on his chest, when he scented the nutcakes.

"You poor thing. However will you survive?" Anna poked at a nutcake to check its temperature before picking it up with her fingertips.

Yuan leaned against the counter. "Such a comfort, the sympathy of friends."

"Children." Doria said warningly.

"Let them get it all out now, Doria. They won't argue as much later." Kratos told her. He was dresses in a white cotton shirt and a worn pair of breeches, a towel around his neck.

Anna looks him over. "Where were you so early?"

It was Yuan who answered as Kratos reached behind him to get a nutcake. "Training."

"Without breakfast?"

"It's the way I was taught." Kratos replied. "If you do it as soon as you wake up, it gives you energy for the day and clears your mind of any lingering dreams."

_(It's the nightmares that keep her awake, that haunt her steps. She doesn't want to see the faces of the corpses anymore, the faces of the prisoners. Doesn't want to remember the experiments and the screams)_

"Teach me."

Both of the seraphim blinked at her. "Pardon?"

"Teach me to fight." Anna repeated. "It's not as though you can always be around to protect me anyway."

Yuan and Kratos looked at each other and they had one of their many silent conversations. "We can begin tomorrow."

Anna was slightly surprised that Kratos had agreed so easily. She'd never seen him do any of his morning training while they'd been living together, but she knew from the way that he cared for his sword and the way he fought that, to Kratos, his swordsmanship was something _personal_.

"Sir, there's some new information on the prisoners' Exsphere problem." Botta said. "Ravel's upstairs waiting for you to give you the full details."

Yuan pushed himself off the counter. "And so the day begins."

"I'll go as well." Kratos said. "That way Ravel won't have to repeat himself."

Once they're gone, Botta looks at Anna. "You asked Kratos to train you?"

"You make it sound like that's a bad thing."

"Not…_bad_, really. Kratos is a hard teacher, to put it lightly, but if you make it through his training, you'll be…stronger than you thought you ever could."

"It's just fighting arts. It can't be that amazing." While Anna would be the first to admit that Kratos was an incredible fighter, it was also just sword and hand fighting. Those things were common enough during these hard times.

Botta had an odd look in her eyes. "You'll learn."

-/-/-/-

Ravel was a scholarly kind of man, with straight black hair just long enough to be caught in a ponytail at the nape of his neck. He didn't look up from his work when Kratos and Yuan entered the room.

"What've you found?"

"It seems that the dwarves under Yggdrasill's employ have been losing their skills, working on Derris-Kharlan. They might still live underground, but spending so much time aboveground and removed from the earth is making their fingers clumsy and their hammer work shoddy. It's a slow process, but it's happening. Apparently, Pronyma is going out and searching for new dwarves to recruit. There aren't many left, but they did get ahold of one."

"And where is this dwarf?"

"He lives in the mountain range beneath the Ossa Trail, far below the mining tunnels. I can't read dwarven, but the translation of his name reads to Dirk."

"Is he willing to help us?"

"We've got a few people heading that way now so we can find out the answer to that question."

"They're in disguise?"

"Mm. As Desians, so they don't get stopped at the roadblocks that have been set up since you and Anna's brilliant escape."

"You do realize that that might scare Dirk off?" Yuan pointed out.

"It's the only way. Otherwise, the Desians might be able to get a lock on our location."  
"Then we hope for the best."

-/-/-/-

It was barely dawn when Anna's door clicks open. Her head immediately whips towards the person.

Kratos' eyes widen just a bit at the sight of her fully awake. "I did not expect you to be up, even being such an early riser as yourself."

"You said that the way you were taught to fight cleared the mind of lingering dreams. I'm tired of the nightmares, Kratos. Of being haunted by things I never wanted to see again."

Kratos doesn't know what to say to that, so he simply says, "Get dressed then. Outside in five minutes."

The desert is almost pleasant before the sun had risen. It was cooler than during the day, but warmer than it was at midnight. When Anna stepped out onto the sand, Kratos was already exercising. He went through intricate routines, slow the first time, fast enough that she couldn't see him the second time. He punched and blocked with his arms, kicked powerfully from standing positions. Anna stayed back and watched him. She'd never seen anything like this before.

When he was done, he looked at Anna and said, "Come here."

She obeyed.

"You should learn to fight without a weapon first, while your body builds itself back up." He told her as he took her hand and shaped it into a thumb-over-fingers fist. "You always want to hit with the first two knuckles. It'll hurt at first, but if youpractice on every flat surface you can—rocks and walls for instance—you'll build up enough callous to protect those knuckles."

He guided her through a punch that she'd never seen. Her fist started palm-up at her waist, turning as she punched until it hit the target palm-down. After he showed her, Kratos backed up and circled her, watching. He would often adjust her shoulders, or reposition her feet.

"Keep yourself firmly grounded." Kratos said. "Your feet should feel rooted to the earth. Gnome's mana runs through all of the ground and you have to let it flow through your body through the soles of your feet. The mana will go through you and out through your fists."

He rapped her stomach hard and more than once as she punched. "Keep those muscles tight."

It was after the sun was rising in the sky and the day beginning to heat rapidly when Yuan came out, sitting on a boulder to watch.

"Don't try and simply hit the opponent. You have to try and go through him. When you punch, picture an opponent right where your punch ends. Neither of us is average height, so we aim higher than where our ribcages end."

"Otherwise you'd end up hitting your opponents' knees." Yuan called.

Kratos stepped back and was silent for long minutes as she continued to practice. After she'd gone for a while, he taught her arm blocks.

"Practice until it hurts." Kratos told her once her legs were trembling a little from the exertion and sweat dripped down both of their foreheads from the heat.

"Why?" Anna panted. Yuan handed her a canteen of water.

"Because that way, by the time you need it, you no longer have to think about what you're doing. You just react."

"Makes sense." Anna sat beside Yuan and wiped her face with her arm. Once her breathing had evened out a little, she asked the half-elf, "Why don't you train in the morning? Didn't you and he learn to fight the same way?"

"We did. I don't have much time to train anymore."

Anna's eyebrow quirked. "You're four thousand years old and don't need to sleep. You're telling me you don't have an hour to train?"

"Now you realize just how taxing this job is. Though I do manage to squeeze a half an hour every now and then."  
Kratos picked up his sword from where he'd left it leaning on the boulder before taking a long draught of water. "He's also much more a magician than he is a warrior."

Yuan leaned back on one arm, a lazy smirk on his lips. "Is that so, Kratos?"

Anna knew that neither of them were human, hadn't really been anything remotely human for four thousand years, but she'd never really seen any signs of it other than in their words. Now, the way they moved and watched each other, it wasn't natural. Or rather, it was natural, but not on a person.

Kratos stood in the quietly alert way that Noishe did when he sensed danger. He was too still. He hardly seemed to be breathing and Anna found herself wondering if they actually needed to breathe anymore.

Yuan, on the other hand, had a vibrating energy to him, even as he stayed perfectly still. And the way he was watching Kratos was like the way that a wolf watched a possible challenger. Not quite hostile, but wary and there was no mistaking the danger there.

Anna wasn't sure what it was between them now. It was like their silent conversations, but not because she'd become accustomed to those after weeks of living with them and she knew what they looked like.

Yuan stands in a movement that's liquid grace. "I'll be back in a few minutes."  
Anna looks at Kratos. "What was all that about?"  
"We're going to fight."  
"For no reason at all?"

"It has been a great many years since we've fought. It is reason enough."

Anna doesn't pretend to understand that. Perhaps it was some warrior thing or a guy thing. It might even have simply been another facet of Yuan and Kratos' odd relationship.

When Yuan comes outside once more, he's in old, worn clothes and he holds the weapon in his hand familiarly. It was a weapon Anna had never even heard of. It's basic form was a metal staff, but there was a curved blade at both ends. There were inlaid designs and colors on the blades, which were perfectly symmetrical and identical to each other.

The seraphim moved out further out into the sands, though they didn't move and simply watched each other once more.

Yuan shifted to the side just a bit, and Kratos' blade darted outwards so quickly that the movement was nearly invisible.

Yuan swung his Swallow up to block before breaking away. Kratos cut from the side and he parried, dancing away and spinning his weapon. The bright colors on the blades would have distracted a lesser opponent. Yuan spun and hacked away at Kratos, who blocked the powerful swings with a practiced kind of ease. They'd been doing this dance for millennia, after all.

Word had spread through the base and now there was a larger audience. Anna was joined by teenagers and their smaller siblings; by researchers and technicians and mothers. Botta stood right by Anna, arms crossed. He watched his leader and the other seraphim as intently as the others.

Kratos and Yuan's exchange stretched out for what seemed like hours in blocks and rapid strikes; parries and sharp jabs. Neither gained an advantage on the other. Both were sweating heavily. Though they couldn't feel the heat, it affected them nonetheless and their arms and shoulders were beginning to ache from blocking each other's powerful blows. They had searched each other's styles for any flaw—not only as an opponent, but as a friend.

Kratos pushed aside a swing from the left with his free hand, ducked the other blade from the opposite side and his blade rushed upwards to kiss Yuan's collarbone.

Yuan smirked and looked down meaningfully. Taking one eye off of his friend, Kratos followed his eyes. The point of the Swallow was resting lightly against his heart.

They stay frozen in that position for a long heartbeat before they simultaneously pull their weapons back. Yuan pushed his bangs out of his face. "Best fight I've had in centuries." He panted.

Kratos sheathed his sword and wiped the sweat from his face. He doesn't need to say anything out loud. It was the best fight either of them had had in centuries because the only other person that was a match for them was Mithos and he never used a bladed weapon anymore.

"You guys are both idiots sometimes, you know that?" Anna tells them as she hands them the canteen and the towel. "Because only idiots would fight like _that_ when it's this hot out."

They both shrug and don't reply. Anna won't admit it out loud, but her heart had been in her throat the entire time she'd watched that violent dance.

-/-/-/-

Someone touched her shoulder and Anna rolled over instinctively towards it, eyes cracking open.

"Wake up, Anna. You'll have to keep early hours if you want to learn to fight."

She groaned and made a vague go-away motion at Kratos, even as she swung her feet out from beneath the sheets. "I'm up, I'm up."

Kratos had been right. Anna had been sleeping easier since she began training with him. The soreness of her muscles that persisted through the day seemed to keep the nightmares at bay, though they weren't stifled completely. But the aches in her muscles and back were the good kind. The kind that came from progress and slow strengthening.

Her movements were choppy where in Kratos' there was fluid grace, but no longer did she begin to tire one-third of the way through the work. Last week, she'd glanced in the mirror as she'd been dressing and had been surprised that she was beginning to look like herself again.

The blonde dye had come out entirely weeks ago. Her hair was still short, but Anna was finding that she preferred it that way. It was much easier to manage. Her body had begun to fill out as well. She didn't look like a scarecrow of a person anymore. Her arms had lean muscles and Anna couldn't count her ribs. Her hips and breasts had a gentle swell to them that had only been hinted at when the Desians had taken her.

Anna quickly changed into the soft, worn shirt and rough breeches that she used to train before hurrying downstairs.

She was beginning to understand what Botta had meant. Kratos was a hard teacher, not taking excuses and he worked her and a few of the other women who'd asked him to train them as well until it felt as though their feet might collapse underneath them. Though the others weren't woken as early to train, Anna could forgive that because the later they woke up, the hotter it got.

Sometimes, Kratos would finish with her early and work in closer detail with the others. Watching him move through he warm-ups, and spar with each other, Anna realized that Kratos was absolutely serious about women being comfortable with fighting to the point where they didn't need men to protect them.

Yuan would always come out to watch and sometimes he'd spar with Anna. He was quick to point out the weak points in her guard, usually in her stomach or her head, and he would hit her once because her guard was down and once more so she wouldn't do it again. The system worked rather well because soon, Anna was hardly ever letting her guard down in a fight.

Yuan and Kratos didn't spar again, though sometime Anna would come downstairs and they'd already be there. One would go through forms and the other would stop them occasionally and show them the weak points. It wasn't often that they corrected the other, but when they did, they worked at it until there were no weak points at all.

Kratos spars with her only sparingly. Though the first time, Anna's fist had actually connected with his cheek rather hard.

She'd smiled at him, falsely sweet. "That's for the kiss you stole."

When Kratos told Yuan about it later, as he hadn't come downstairs yet, Yuan had just chuckled.

Every morning after the training, Anna went into the kitchen with the other women and would nibble at whatever Doria had prepared while the other women would talk and laugh. Noishe stayed beside her, a warm presence that she didn't mind sharing her breakfast with.

When Anna would be drawn into the conversation, she'd find herself a little awkward, though she didn't feel nearly as uncomfortable as she had in Luin or Palmacosta. These women weren't quite normal, but they were still closer to it than she was. Anna wondered whether her block with being around normal people would ever go away.

-/-/-/-

Doria had applauded when Anna came downstairs one day after training dressed in a green cotton dress. Some of the men having a late breakfast whistled, but Anna had learned that they were the teasing sort so she didn't mind.

Yuan's eyes had widened for a moment. "Well would you look at that? You actually look quite lovely when you try."

Anna pushed him with her shoulder good-naturedly. She feels somebody watching her and Anna turns. Kratos was surveying her from head to toe, an odd look in his eyes. It's only now that a reluctant blush finds its way to her cheeks.

"Either say something or don't, Kratos, but stop staring!"

"It looks good." He said at last. In truth, he thinks she looks beautiful, but there's a line that he refuses to cross.

Though the part that confuses him is that in no way was the dress practical and Anna was always the practical one. But he wisely keeps his mouth shut on that subject because, as Yuan and he have discussed before, Kratos is always going to be baffled by women's lines of thought.


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note:** I saw Inception with Leonardo DiCaprio…holy crap. It was such an incredible movie. At the end, everyone was holding their breaths and when the credits started rolling, everyone let the breath out and was like "Aww…" :(

There aren't many movies that I absolutely have to see again, but Inception is up there with Sherlock Holmes for me. It's actually higher up there, which is quite a deal of praise coming from me.

It's raining loads down here (surprise surprise. Stupid, bipolar Florida weather). Hopefully, it stops by August 23rd (AKA First day of school)

My brother found an awesome site for writing and it's helping us loads with our book and for my stories. Here's the site, without the spaces, obviously.

w w w . w r i t e a n d p u b l i s h y o u r b o o k . c o m

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/

_"It's not worth doing something unless you are doing something that someone, somewhere, would much rather you weren't doing."—Terry Pratchett_

-/-/

"…Who taught you to fight?" Anna asks one night. Both she and Kratos had been given large workloads with researching and helping build the crafts that Botta had designed that he said would be able to travel through the interdimensional fissure, so they were eating a rather late dinner. Even Doria had bid them good night when they'd walked in.

Kratos dips a slice of bread in the broth. "…He was a friend of Yuan's, a war prisoner. But he'd been permanently injured a few years before either of had met him, so he'd been in the village when the humans invaded. That didn't change the fact that he was still an excellent soldier."

"He taught you the hand-to-hand fighting as well?"

"That's actually most of what he taught me. I was taught most of my swordsmanship by my father and the military school that I was sent to."

Anna's eyebrows disappeared into her hairline. "What did you do that was so bad that you got sent to military school?"  
Kratos took a bite of the bread and swallowed before answering. "…It was never because of something I did. I was always going to go to military school whether I wanted to or not."

Anna hummed thoughtfully. It was the most information that Kratos had ever volunteered that was _personal_. She tilts her head as she regards him, trying to imagine Kratos without the sword at his side, or his ever neat appearance (save for the auburn hair that seemed determined to not lie flat).

She can't. Those parts are such a part of the Kratos she knows that she really can't.

"I don't get you." Anna says suddenly. Kratos sets his empty bowl down in the sink and frowns at her, slightly confused. Her bowl clatters as she sets it down slightly too hard. "You do all these things that you don't need or have to anymore. Why? You can't taste, so there's no real point in eating. So why would you do it?"

Kratos has asked himself these same questions hundreds of times and he still doesn't have an answer. Not one that he's not a little ashamed of, at least.

He isn't going to reply; Anna knows that right away. The question was far too deep in the _personal_ category. But Anna had watched him go through the motions of being human—no, not even human—being a regular person _(Not normal because no one in the base is normal) _and couldn't understand why he did it.

Anna knows that she and Kratos can argue and speak in circles until one of them becomes annoyed enough to leave the room from the many small arguments that happened naturally when people lived together. (It was usually Anna that did the leaving, but she'd been able to get him to do it once or twice.) Knowing that, Anna doesn't press her question, as much as she might want to. Kratos' stubbornness and patience far outweighed hers.

Instead, she looks around the kitchen. Its bare essence was very clinical. No color on the walls, the cabinets not squeaking like those that are used often. But there were touches of Doria in the kitchen, in the vase of flowers on the small table by the window, in the dishtowels stained with tomatoes from a small food fight that the kids had gotten into (Kratos had stayed well away from the kitchen that day). There was a dish of…some kind of meat soaking in Doria's special sauce on the counter.

But there were touches of Yuan and Kratos in the kitchen as well as through the rest of the base. The herbs in the flowerbeds, the furniture that was sometimes at odds with itself because Yuan liked fabrics that had interesting textures when they became worn and odd details in the patterns or in the wood. Kratos liked simple, clean cut furniture.

Somewhere along the way, a place that had been intended to be a rebel army's base had also become a home.

"…Did Doria have a family?" Anna asks because she can't leave the last question simply hanging there between them. "Before all this?"

"I've never thought about it." Kratos said honestly. "Where did the question come from?"

"She reminds me of a mother." Or so Anna thinks. She still can't remember very much about her mother, though she's been trying. "She tries to take care of everybody."

"That's because most of the people here won't take care of themselves. Too work-driven."

Anna crossed her arms and gave him a pointed look. "Sound like anyone you know?"

Kratos turned the knob by the faucet so he could begin washing their dishes. "Yuan, actually. You've no idea how often I've found him asleep at his desk."

Anna clicked her tongue, slightly annoyed. Kratos Aurion, Master of Evasion Extraordinaire.

-/-/-/-/

"What's happened?" Kratos doesn't ask if something's wrong because he can see the look on Yuan's face.

"You remember the operatives that we sent to go check on that dwarf a week ago?" Yuan doesn't wait for Kratos' reply because he knows that Kratos has good memory. Not as good as his, but good. "They should've checked in yesterday."

"And they haven't?" Kratos guessed.

"Nothing. I gave them a day. I thought maybe they just couldn't get to town or they'd run into some bad weather or something. I can't think that anymore."

"I'll go check it out."  
Yuan shook his head and stood up. "They're my people and it's my fault they're out there. I'll go."

"If they got caught, then whoever got them might know all about this by now and whoever it is knows about Cruxis. You can't be seen looking for rebels that you reported to Yggdrasill."

"Are you willing to be my cover if the worst should happen?" Yuan knows that, before Anna, he wouldn't have had to ask that question. And even if things between Kratos and Anna weren't even quite there yet, Yuan knows Kratos well enough to know that this needs to be asked now.

Kratos appreciates the question, but his answer hasn't changed. "Of course I am."

-/-/-/-/-

"Are you sanguine about what we're going to find?" Kratos asked as they search the mines beneath the Ossa Trail for any sign of their people or of Dirk. He had to have some way to get to his house and the mines would be the easy way.

"What's sanguine mean again? You know I can't keep up with all them fancy words you use."

Kratos doesn't comment on the slight accent that colors Yuan's voice. It's one of Yuan's defense mechanisms, a way to not connect the pieces that were being laid out in front of him. Yuan had always seen the glass as half-full.

"Hopeful." Kratos answers. He can hear gentle sounds on the wind, hardly audible even to his ears so low underground, and knows that Yuan hears it too. It's a sound similar they had heard most every night when travelling with Martel when she would play her flute. He hadn't known that there were still Linkite Trees alive in either of the worlds. "And it also means bloody."

"That covers all the options, now doesn't it?" Yuan blocks the sound out. He doesn't need to be reminded of Martel. Not right now.

"Hello?" Both of the seraphim turn towards the voice, tense. The owner of the voice hardly reaches their waists and he's got a full brown beard and intense dark eyes beneath bushy brown eyebrows. Had they been mortal, they wouldn't have seen him at all in the darkness. "Can I help ye?"

"Are you Dirk?" Yuan asks.

"I am." Dirk holds up a lantern to see them better. "How would you be privy to that kind of information?"

"Because we know where to look. Has anyone else come around asking for you?"

"Other than the two of ye, not a soul's been through these mines since last week."

Both of their instincts instantly sharpened. "What happened last week?"  
"Part of the old mine collapsed. Why'd you ask?"

"Some friends of ours were in this area last week and we haven't been able to contact them."

"So you thought to go lookin' for 'em? Don't ye even hear abou' these kinds o' things wherever yer from?"

Yuan and Kratos don't even need to exchange looks to know the story that they're going to use. "We're from Palmacosta." Kratos says. "We took a boat to Izlood and were going to meet our friends up on the mountain before we headed to Triet, but they never showed. We decided to come looking for them."

"And ye searched down 'ere?"

"We were told by some soldiers by the entrance to the mines that you might be able to help us."

"…Soldiers?"  
"Yes."

"Only kind of soldier around these parts in these days are Desians. You supporters?"  
Yuan took a step closer to the dwarf, his voice low. "Quite the opposite. We are part of the rebellion. We're in need of your services."

"Seems ter me that a lot of people be needin' a dwarf's work these days."

"Do you know anything of Key Crests?"

"No self-respectin' dwarf doesn't."

"We need Key Crests for escapees of the human ranches that the Desians have set up. I don't think I need to tell you what might happen to them if they don't get those Crests."

"I promised meself that I wouldn't take sides in all this."  
"So you know about the other side then?"

"Aye. Came around a bit before the mine collapse askin' me to do some work for 'em. All I can see is trouble, no matter which direction I'm lookin', so I'm stayin' out of it."

"We really need your help. Or if you're that against it, can you refer us to a dwarf who can help us."

Before Dirk can answer, another, brighter light glows through the cavern. It's much more subtle than the lantern and that tells them just who it was.

"Excellent work on finding him, Yuan." Yggdrasill said, striding towards them. "I didn't think you'd do it quite so quickly."

"He was being surprisingly obvious."

Yggdrasill's blue eyes glint. "How unlike you, Kratos."

Kratos crosses his arms. He isn't afraid of Yggdrasill. Never has been. He's not afraid of the madness that had broken the boy they knew. He just knew that he couldn't kill him. Not even after all that he'd done. "I was still searching for any information on the rebel organization."

"And why would you be searching for that? You betrayed us."  
"I was set up. By Kvar."

"You've been known to be an excellent liar. You're going to need proof." Yggdrasill knew Kratos well enough and he trusted him far more than he did Kvar. But he wasn't blind to the fact that Kratos could very well have betrayed Yggdrasill and Cruxis. But Kratos deserved a chance.

"Which is what I was trying to get. The rebels have apparently contacted this dwarf. I'd hoped he might give me some information, but I couldn't exactly interrogate him with Yuan deciding that I was a traitor."

Yggdrasill studied Kratos before saying, "Come back to Cruxis. I wish to hear about all this in more detail. Yuan, check Kratos' story with the dwarf."  
Yuan mutters a sarcastic 'yessir' and waits for the mine to fill with that bright light again as they teleport away. Yuan had never quite mastered teleportation magic—it had lots to do with numbers and calculations and he'd never been good at that sort of thing. Yuan was a big picture kind of guy—and he preferred to walk anyway.

"I'm guessin' that the situation's a bit more complicated than you let on." Dirk said.

"It is at that. You must get out of here. Have you anywhere you can go?"  
"Not many places left for a dwarf these days, but I'll manage." Dirk hesitated. "There ain't no one else to do th' Key Crests?"

Yuan shook his head. "Believe me when I say we've looked."

"I'll see what I can do. Can't very well let those people turn into monsters 'cause of the Desians."

Yuan smiled gratefully. "That'll be a great help."  
"But it'll take some time to get the materials together, especially since ye've said that I must leave. How'm I to contact ye so ye can know where I'll be livin? Ye still need m' help."

"Don't tell me where you're going to move. It's safer if you don't." Yuan prides himself on being a man nearly impossible to break under torture, but he's sure Yggdrasill can think of a few things. "We found you once. I think we can find you again."

Dirk nodded and held out a rough hand. Yuan had to bend low to shake it. "Good luck with whatever it is yer trying ter do."

"Same to you."

-/-/-/-

Kratos accepts the wine that Yggdrasill pours him without complaint. He doesn't test it for poison, though his instincts tell him to. Poisoning him now would do Yggdrasill no good.

"Allow me to guess. You're going to tell me that you aren't a traitor."  
"I'm not. And if I _were _to betray Cruxis, I wouldn't do it in such an obvious way."

"So you're telling me that Kvar is the traitor?" All of the starkness of Derris-Kharlan washes Yggdrasill out. His naturally pale complexion becomes pasty and he looks much smaller.

"I certainly wasn't the one to release the prisoners. And the times that I was there, he had a rather convenient excuse to be absent at the times that the prisoners escaped." Kratos took a sip of the wine and even the shadow of the taste was enough to make him want to grimace. He'd always hated the taste of wine. When he was a child, his mother would allow him a sip of hers at dinner. He hadn't liked it then, but he was always assured that he would like it more once his taste buds matured.

Apparently not. And even if he had grown to like wine, they hadn't been able to afford it once they were grown. He and Yuan had been too poor for years to afford more than a meal a day, one that they had to split between them. The rare times that they had been able to afford more, they'd gone to the local tavern and drunk ale.

"And you ran. Innocent people don't run, Kratos." Yggdrasill eyes Kratos' shorter hair. "Or disguise themselves."

"I know you well, Yggdrasill and I knew you'd demand proof, and that was what I went looking for. And I couldn't go after the proof while the Desians recognized me."

"I fail to see how the dwarf fits into all this."

The ability to know when to reveal information and when to hold it back was necessary for people in their situations. Of the seraphim, Kratos was the worst at it as he didn't enjoy manipulating people like Yuan and Yggdrasill did, but he could still do it.

"The rebels want to help the prisoners. Kvar, knowing the nature of the Exspheres as he does, would know that they need Key Crests, but he couldn't go to a dwarf under Cruxis. Kvar was being very careful to not let anything be traced back. So he found one of the last free dwarves, most likely using Cruxis' own database, to make those Key Crests."

"That particular dwarf had turned us down, so I'm told."

"Most likely because he was already working under Kvar."

"And you can prove all this, can you?"

"Give me some time and I can." He seems to need that a lot lately. Time, that is.

"I'll want regular reports."

"Of course."

Kratos hears the silent dismissal and sets his wineglass down before he leaves Yggdrasill alone once again.

-/-/-/-

"Would you look at that?" Yuan says when Kratos walks into what had been unofficially titled 'the planning room'. Kratos told them to simply call it a library. Shelves upon shelves of reference material were on the walls as well as cubbies of rolled up plans and sketches tacked onto the walls. "Alive and in one piece. A miracle if I ever saw one."

Kratos leaned his palms on the table, looking across at Yuan. "It's time to put your forgery skills to good use."

Yuan looked up from the plans for the inter-dimensional transfer vehicle's engine. "You've caught my attention."

"Yggdrasill wants proof that Kvar is the one behind the rebels. As that proof doesn't actually exist…"

Yuan smirked. "I think I'm going to enjoy this."

"You seem to enjoy a lot of illegal acts. Forgery, thievery…"

Yuan spread his hands and shrugged. "What can I say? I'm a born criminal."

-/-/-/-/-

"...Is it supposed to look like that?"

Anna glares flatly at him. Her hair is pushed out of her sweaty face with a headband and her skin is covered in soot. Everyone working on the vehicles had to be able to do each other's jobs and it was Anna's turn at blacksmith duty. Unfortunately, the forge had to be outside unless they wanted an accidental fire, so on top of the heat from the forge, the heat from outside was beating down on her even as she crafted the metal sheets for the body of the vehicle.

Anna wasn't the best at metal-smithing, but she was a fast learner. The metal sheets that were already sitting in the shade had a few dents to be worked on, but overall, it was serviceable. "I'd like to see you do better."

Kratos doesn't rise to the challenge, though he could. They'd been taught to make their swords before ever learning to fight with them at the military school. Instead, he holds up the small tray. "I heard you'd been out here for a while. You'll get dehydrated unless you rest for a while."

Anna eyes the tray. She can't quite tell what's in the tin cup, but she can see a bowl of fruit. She sets down the hammer before joining Kratos to sit on the steps that led into the cool kitchen.

"Thanks." Anna says as she plucks a ripe strawberry from the bowl. How the people of Triet managed to grow such delicious fruit in a climate like this was a secret Anna doubted she'd ever learn.

Kratos isn't surprised by the vigor in which Anna eats. "Did you even eat lunch today?"

"…Some of it."

Kratos shakes his head as he stands to pick up one of the metal sheets and a small hammer before returning to his seat. "And you criticize the rest of us for being workaholics."

"Apparently, this is a base full of hypocrites." Anna nibbles on the fruit, watching Kratos patiently fix the dents. "So what happened?"

"What are you talking about?"

His expression hasn't changed, but Anna knows him—well, she knows him the better than anyone else, excluding Yuan—and she's learned to read his moods.

"Just…the way you're acting. Something happened to bother you."

Kratos considered lying, but quickly cast that though away. He knew all too well just how much Anna was involved in this and it didn't seem right to keep her in the dark about all of it anymore.

"Yggdrasill believes me to be searching for proof on the rebel organization."

"At least you know you're fooling him successfully." Anna says reasonably.

"And his judgment on exactly how guilty of being a traitor I am is on hold until either I bring him proof or he finds something incriminating about me."

"So lying low, is it?"

Kratos nodded. "I believe it's starting to become a trend." Anna laughed before taking a cautious sip from the tin cup. Blessedly cool tea trickled down her throat. "And we found a dwarf not working with Cruxis."

"To help with the problem with the Exspheres, right?"

"Right. But Yuan tells me that he must go into hiding once more or else Cruxis is likely to terminate him."

Anna frowned. "That seems a bit extreme."

"Cruxis is merciless when it comes to taking down the opposition."

"Cruxis or Yggdrasill?"

Sometimes, Kratos truly hated how intuitive Anna could be. "…Both."

Anna wonders if Kratos still considered himself part of Cruxis. He seemed to pretend that he wasn't an angel, wasn't one of the people to help create an organization that had deceived and controlled the twisted forms of the world.

Anna wordlessly holds out a slice of pineapple. She knows it's a favorite of his. Kratos takes it with a murmured thank you before popping it into his mouth.

Both of their heads jerk around when the door to the kitchen bursts open. Kratos is partially on his feet and going for his sword even as the metal in his lap drops with a _clang. _He relaxes when a familiar texture brushes his fingers, even as he hears the whine behind him.

Noishe's head is in Anna's lap and the large eyes looking up at her mournfully. Anna sighs. "What'd you do this time, mutt?"

"He ate my chicken soaked in my special plum wine sauce." Everyone seemed to shrink under the terror of Doria's anger.

Kratos scratched at Noishe's head. "Must've been tasty." He murmurs and Anna hides a grin when Noishe whuffs softly in agreement.

"You keep him out of my kitchen, Kratos. I'm absolutely serious. What am I to make for dinner now?"

Kratos is faltering a little now and Anna thinks that this is her cue to jump in. "What about some stew? I noticed that almost everyone had second helpings of your stew yesterday."

"The chicken was the last of the meat until we go to Triet tomorrow."

"I'm sure that Noishe would be glad to catch you some rabbits." Anna offers.

"Rabbits in my plum wine sauce. Absolutely ridiculous." Doria mutters. She points at Noishe, who sits back on his haunches, a pitiful expression on his furry face. "Two rabbits and not scrawny ones either."

When Doria goes back in the kitchen, Kratos looks straight at Noishe. "Did you get that?" He holds up two fingers. "Two plump bunnies for Doria." He gently pushes Noiseh until he's standing and slinking away. "She's going to need them soon, too."

"I never knew how terrifying that woman could be." Anna said.

"She is an excellent cook though." Kratos pointed out. He was able to actually taste her cooking. It wasn't strong, because none of the others complained, but she refused to tell Yuan exactly how she had managed to make food—quite by accident—that angels could taste.

"What did Noishe do this time?"

They both turn towards Yuan, who was gently floating down, wings beating slowly to keep him aloft. "Why are you flying?" Kratos asked.

"I heard the commotion and thought it safer if I just jumped out the window." Yuan replied, wings disappearing as he touched down lightly. "What happened?"

"Noishe ate dinner."

"That explains the ruckus downstairs. Did she skin him and put him in her stew yet?"

"She's not quite there yet. Noishe was ordered to find her some rabbits."

"See?" Yuan said triumphantly. "I told you, Kratos, didn't I? That I didn't entirely destroy all hunting instinct?"

"If he returns with the rabbits, then you can say that." Kratos told him.

"Such faith in your pet."

"Noishe comes and goes as he pleases."

"Do you have a better word for him?"

"Not quite. I forgot to tell you, though. Do you remember asking me to come up with a name for all this?" Kratos motioned to the base.

"You thought of one?"

"How does the name the Renegades sound to you?"

"Renegades." Yuan rolls the word around in his mouth, trying out different inflections. "I like it."

"I thought you might."


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note:** School starts soon. Sigh.

Anyone else catch Melissa and Joey? I'm already loving it.

I went book-shopping and finally bought Howl's Moving Castle as well as Fruits Basket #15 (I've read them all, but I tend to buy mangas by which ones are my favorites rather than buying them in the order they come) I also bought the next in a favorite series of mine. The Five Ancestors. It's not a hard read (actually, it's in the children's section in the bookstore) but it's got enough plot twists and interesting characters that I've fallen in love with it anyway. Anyone else ever heard of this series?

The Renegades finally have a name and I'm trying hard as I can to push Kratos and Anna together. Unfortunately, this means that Coffee and Spirits is temporarily on hold while I finish this up, though I'm writing the next chapter in bits and pieces.

God save me, but I've got another idea for a ToS fanfiction. If anyone's ever seen the movie _Yentl_ (does it count as a musical?) I'm planning to go off of that a bit. The main character would be Raine, but I'm having difficulties choosing who should be opposite her in the male lead. I'm leaning towards Regal, but there are options, as it tends to be in video games. Suggestions?

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/  
_Matchmaker, Matchmaker,  
Plan me no plans  
I'm in no rush  
Maybe I've learned  
Playing with matches  
A girl can get burned  
So,  
Bring me no ring  
Groom me no groom  
Find me no find  
Catch me no catch  
Unless he's a matchless match_  
-_Matchmaker, Matchmaker__** (Fiddler on the Roof)**_

-/-/

Anna slid into Yuan's office, careful not to spill the two steaming mugs in her hands. "Coffee."

Yuan looks up and smiles gratefully. "You're a godsend."

"That desperate for coffee are you?"

"Doing this much work always has me desperate for coffee." Yuan leans back in his chair, inhaling deeply before drinking. "I thought you'd have been asleep by now. It's late."

Anna shrugged. "Didn't feel like sleeping."

Yuan isn't sure that he can remember nights like that when he could sleep, but he knows the feeling of being tired, but unable to get to sleep no matter how hard you tried.

"…Would you mind very much if I asked you a possibly personal question?"

Anna sat cross-legged in one of the chairs across from him. Yuan had hesitated, just a little, before speaking. The last time Anna had seen him do that was when he and Kratos were telling her the truth about Cruxis. "Sure. Go ahead."

"…What do you think of Kratos?"  
Anna blinked. "Kind of a random question, don'tcha think?" Yuan didn't ask again, letting the question hang in the air between them. Anna sipped at the coffee before answering.

"He's…stubborn and evasive. He's got a stupid sense of chivalry," Yuan chuckled at that. Anna ignored him. "But at the same time, he's still a pretty nice guy."

"…Would you call him handsome?"

Anna stared at the half-elf. "Yuan, I didn't think you were sly."

"I'm not sly. I much prefer women, thank you." Most of the time, but Yuan decided that Anna didn't entirely need to know that. "Just answer the question."

Anna thought about Kratos. She still has trouble remembering anything from her childhood, but she knows that Kratos wasn't storybook handsome. She'd seen some of his scars, had felt his rough hands on her skin. Handsome didn't quite describe him. His hair wasn't entirely soft, Anna remembered from when she and Yuan had helped dye and cut his hair.

But at the same time, Anna remembered the uneven angle of his smile and the way that he communicated, much like Noishe, through his eyes. His eyes weren't a natural color either. They were brown at times, but mostly they were tinted red. And she'd seen him without a shirt, some mornings in Luin or Palmacosta when she'd be just waking up and Kratos had forgotten a change of clothes after a shower. Anna had been sure to hurriedly find something else to focus on, though she had to admit, the view had been rather nice.

It had been instinctive, but she'd still been a little annoyed with herself for looking away. It wasn't as though she'd never seen men shirtless before, swimming at the lake during summer in Luin.

But Kratos, being the damnably unique person that he was, had made Anna look away because he decided to forget his clothes that morning.

"He's good looking enough, I suppose." Anna answers finally.

Yuan makes a thoughtful noise as he drains the last of the coffee from his mug. "Thanks for the chat."

"You're an ass." She tells him flatly, recognizing the dismissal. Asking questions like that out of the blue. Hadn't Yuan been raised in an age where manners were still in existence?

Yuan smirks at her. "If you'll excuse me, I've got more illegal acts to finish."

Anna glanced at the desk. Those must be the forgeries that Kratos had mentioned. Then she looked back at him and frowned. "So you're a criminal ass."

"So glad to be appreciated."

Anna rolled her eyes and grabbed his empty mug before leaving.

-/-/-/-

"I have two things to say to you."

Kratos didn't open his eyes and burrowed his head into the pillow a little more. They couldn't sleep, but they still needed a chance for the brain to rest and for the body to recuperate. "And it's absolutely necessary to say them _now_?"

Yuan closed the door behind him and crossed the room to sit on the bed, bouncing a little as he sat. "Yes it is."

Kratos rolled over so that he was on his back, opening his eyes so he could see his friend. "I'm listening."

"First of all, I told you so."

Kratos frowned. "You can be so immature. And what was it that you told me?"

"Do you recall a certain conversation in which you believed that Anna wouldn't want you even if, and we were speaking in the hypothetical as you made a strong point of, you were interested in her."

"I vaguely remember it, yes."

"Well, after a rather interesting conversation with our dear beloved Anna, I have concluded that you were absolutely wrong. She thinks you're good-looking."  
Kratos blinked in surprise for a few moments before getting his head back. "…And the second thing?"

Yuan shook his head. Kratos was hopeless when it came to romance. "The second thing was…you were wrong."

"Oh really?"

"I have, on excellent authority, that Anna is attracted to you." Which was very different from thinking that he was good-looking, as they both knew.

"And whose authority is that?"

"…Give me a day and I'll think of someone."

Kratos sighed. "What, exactly, did you talk to Anna about?"

"I just asked her a few questions."

"What were the questions?"

Yuan swung his legs up and scooted back until his back was leaning on the footboard. "Oh, you know, just what she thought of you."

"I'm going to murder you in your bed. Seriously."

"No you're not. What would you do without my meddling, which by the way, is done entirely out of love and concern for you?"

"I wouldn't be hearing all this right now." Kratos pushes himself up to a sitting position. Clearly, Yuan wasn't going to let him rest until this conversation was done. "You had no right to go digging in her business."

"Unfortunately, I was born to be a tad nosy. And since you refuse to do anything about all this, it falls to me."

"There's no need to do anything about anything because there's _nothing there_, Yuan."

"Not even hypothetically?"

"If it's hypothetical, it's not there."

"So we can have this conversation hypothetically? Will you accept that, at least?"

"And we have to do this now?"

"It's now, just between the two of us or I'll hook up an intercom system and the conversation will be for the entire base to hear."

Considering the nature of the conversation, Kratos wasn't willing to call his friend's possible bluff. And even if he did, he knew Yuan could easily set up an intercom system throughout the base if it didn't already exist. "Then by all means, start your rant."

"It is not a rant. It's a perfectly legitimate, albeit occasionally long-winded, explanation on why exactly you should be going for this."

"In other words, a rant."

Yuan ignored that. "Here's my main question: why are you so afraid of all of this? I mean, if she turns you down, it won't be a big deal, now will it?" He asked, suddenly very interested in his nails. "You're going to be alive long after she's dead (She is only human after all) and there are plenty of other women who would be more than happy to be with you. So why all of the beating around the bush?"

"Anna is _not_ like any of the other women." Kratos growled and Yuan settled back against the footboard, giving Kratos a knowing smirk. He'd always known just how to push Kratos' buttons.

"No? And why is that?"

"I refuse to allow you to manipulate me like this. " Kratos told him. He'd watched Yuan manipulate people like puppets on strings for centuries. He knew all of his friends tricks.

"If you say so."

"I refuse to say anything on this subject." Kratos said, recognizing the mild-mannered approach.

Yuan sighed and leaned forward, clasping his hands in his lap. "Kratos, no matter how long you live, there's a lot of things you'll never be. You know what's at the top of that list? A mild-mannered herbalist. You can't be the man you were in Luin because, quite honestly, you're about as meek as a wolf. And Anna knows that. She's _seen_ that. So why is it that you can't seem to trust her enough to ask her to at least try to love the man you actually are?"

"…She deserves better than someone like me, Yuan."

"And if she doesn't want someone else?" Yuan pressed.

"Then I don't know." Kratos said finally. "Does that satisfy your seemingly endless curiosity?"

"For now it will." Yuan stood, but before he left, he looked back at his best friend. "Let me tell you something, Kratos. This man," Yuan poked Kratos' chest, "And this one," He poked Kratos' forehead, "Are on their way to madness. Take it from somebody who knows."

It had been long ago, longer than either of them cared to remember most of the time and it had only happened to Yuan twice in his life. Once when he first met Martel and the second was after she'd died. And he knew that Kratos remembered that time just as well, if not better, than Yuan did.

-/-/-/-

"You seem distracted." Anna said, stopping halfway through one of the forms that Kratos had taught her. "Something wrong?"

"Does having the powerful urge to murder Yuan count as wrong?"

Anna laughed, understanding the urge full well. But then, Yuan had that effect on her almost every time they argued. To make Kratos want to kill him, he must have done something extreme. "What'd he do this time?"

"Nothing of consequence. Continue with your training."

It was still early and they were the only two out here. Dawn was a hazy dream on the horizon.

Anna brushed a lock of hair out of her eyes. As convenient as short hair was, she kind of missed having long hair for the sheer reason that she could pull it back out of her face. _(It's something she only vaguely remembers, being able to actually do things with long hair like style it. The last time she remembers being able to do it is when she was roughly thirteen at a festival)_

"You're lying, which means that whatever it was that he did was pretty bad. So? What was it?"

"He was asking some…improper…questions."

"You too? Weren't you two raised in an age where people were taught to be polite and keep to themselves and all that?"  
"Yuan was never a stickler for the rules." Kratos pointed out.

"No." Anna was silent for a moment before saying, "Do you need an accomplice for his murder, by any chance? I'd be happy to sign up."  
Kratos' lips quirked involuntarily into a smile. "Unfortunately, Yuan's gone recruiting in Tethe'alla."

"How convenient." Anna muttered.

"Yes, he's always been good at making those kinds of excuses to get out of a murder attempt."

"...What's Tethe'alla like?"

"Where did that come from?"

"Just curious I guess. It's like, as a kid, when you pretend that fireflies are faeries when you catch them in a jar and then when you're older, you wonder if that could ever really be possible. If faeries could ever really have existed."

"Tethe'alla is much more involved with magitechnology than Sylvarant. It's the current flourishing world, so there's money and time for scientific endeavors."

"There's no poor people in Tethe'alla? You're joking."  
"I didn't say that." Kratos can easily picture the slums in Meltokio, the half-elves in Exire and the starving artists of Sybak University; he remembers Mizuho with its threadbare silk and thin walls and floors, all remnants of what was once a great village full of culture. "But there are more people with money. There's an actual class distinction."  
"Huh. Sounds like an interesting place…Is there a Chosen there too?"

"Yes."

"There's no need for world regeneration there. Why would-"

"The Chosen's purpose in the flourishing world is to keep the line going for when it no longer flourishes and to lead the Church of Martel."  
Which didn't actually exist. Anna sighed. "You had to make everything so complicated?"

"Well, next time we decide to rewrite history, I'll make sure to keep it simple." Kratos said dryly.

"You do that."

-/-/-/-

"You're from Luin, aren't you?"

Anna looked up. It was one of the women that she watched train in the mornings. Meghan, was her name? "Yeah, why?"

"I dunno. I'm from Hima. Never left home before Yuan came and asked around for any half-elves, I signed up right away. Hima had…nothing. I wanted to see other places. This wasn't exactly what I expected, but it's better than back home. I was just wondering what Luin was like. We heard stories about it back home. It sounded like a dream."

"It's dreamy enough, I guess." Anna towel-dried her hair. After training, Doria refused to allow them to walk through the kitchen sweaty and dirty and taking turns with individual showers took far too long, so they'd managed to hook up some public showers, though it had taken a few broken pipes and leaks before they got it right.

Meghan smiled as she turned the shower knob. "Do you ever miss it?"  
"What, Luin?"

"Mm."

The first answer that comes to Anna's mind is 'yes'. She knows that she should miss Luin. It was her hometown. She had a sister and a mother there; a best friend who was still willing to be friends with her even if they hadn't spoken in eight years.

But the more she thinks about it, the more she realizes that she isn't homesick in the least. Or rather, if she was, she was sick for the home she and Kratos had made accidentally on the houseboat. Their system of Anna cooking and Kratos washing the dishes; of the way that Noishe would nudge her awake, his nose cold and wet.

But they had a similar life here. There were more people here and there were more things to get done, but a lot of their little habits remained the same.

"No, actually."

"You really don't miss Luin? At all?"

"Nope."

Meghan studied Anna's expression. "Does that have anything to do with Kratos?"

"Excuse me?"

"Y'know, Kratos…the guy who's been teaching us to fight…one of the heads of this whole rebel thing."

"I'm well aware of who it is. Why would Kratos have anything to do with my missing home?"  
"Well, I've noticed how you and him are always training in the morning before the rest of us get there. You two seem close."

"Friends are like that, you know. Close and helping each other out."

"So you're telling me that you're not interested him in the least?"

Anna groaned. "This is a conspiracy, seriously. Yuan's got everybody in on it."

Meghan stared. "What?"  
"Nothing. Just talking to myself. I tend to do that." Anna wrapped a towel around herself. "And I make my own decisions. Kratos has nothing to do with any of it."

"This might seem like a bit of a forward question-"

"I seem to be hearing a lot of those lately."  
"But…have you gotten together with him?"

Anna could feel a headache forming behind her eyes. "…No, I haven't and I don't plan to."  
"Is it because you have someone waiting for you back in Luin?"

"…Not that I'm aware of. Kratos and I are just not like that."

"Huh. You guys just act like a couple."  
Anna's eyebrows arched. Hima had to have some interesting couples. "…Sure…whatever you say. Botta wants me in the tech room. Apparently, there's something wrong with the metal sheets that I made the other day. Something about how they don't fit the vehicle."

Meghan opened her mouth, most likely to continue the conversation that Anna was going to be very happy when it ended and Anna quickly hurried out of the showers.

And right into Kratos.

"…Did you forget your clothes?" He asked, releasing her shoulders from when he'd caught her.

Anna realized that she was dressed in only a towel. "I think I've got more than enough reason to have forgotten them."

"I don't understand."

"Another conversation that I'd rather not have again. If you'll excuse me, I need to get dressed."

Her getting dressed sounded like an excellent idea for both of them. Kratos wasn't sure just how long he could keep his eyes averted. Granted, he had seen her basically without a shirt, but that had been in a very different set of circumstances.

"I told her."

Kratos turned to Doria, who was carrying a bag of flour. "You told her what?"

"I told her you fancied her. The day after she came here. She didn't seem to believe it."

"I'm afraid I have to go see if Yuan got those forgeries done, so if you'll excuse me." Kratos had no desire to have another one of these conversations.

-/-/-/-

"You're an evil man." Kratos tells Yuan as soon as he comes through the door.

"Pardon?"  
"Did you intentionally create an entire army of allies in your campaign to convince me that I should say something to Anna?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about, but it sounds like you had an interesting day." Yuan said as he came to sit beside his friend in the only other chair in the planning room.

"Considering that I had Doria say it outright in the hall and Botta hinted at it when he asked me to go get Anna since she was apparently late."

"I assure you, I had nothing to do with any of this, though I'm sorry I missed it. But there is good news to today."  
"Is that so?"

"It is. Exire apparently doesn't keep very many records—Maxwell isn't even mentioned by name through it all anymore—and no one seems to remember that it's thanks to Mithos that they're up there at all."  
"I thought that they said that it was a hero who made a pact with a Summon Spirit."

"That's exactly what they say. No names. Nothing."

It was easy to forget sometimes just how powerful Time was. It had obliterated entire cities, entire cultures to little more than dust on the wind.

"In any case, many of them were more than willing to join in the fight against Cruxis. There were also half-elves in Ozette, Sybak and a few in the Meltokio slums that wished to join as well."

"You didn't tell them the part about having to help build a base in a snowy wasteland, did you?"  
"Contrary to popular opinion, I'm not a moron. I would ask some of he people here to help, but I can't sneak them through Derris-Kharlan."

"…Pretend they're prisoners. You do have some pull with Cruxis, remember?"

Yuan smirked. "Imagine that. I even have enough pull to get the Desians off your back. Do you remember that?"

"Vividly." Kratos said darkly.

"Relax. After the day you've had, I've decided to have some mercy on you. I won't discuss 'that' today. Going back to the original point, you expect me to lie to Yggdrasill about finding some stray rebels and that I'm bringing to Tethe'alla to work in the research labs?"

"My original idea was not nearly so complex, but feel free to go with that."

"Wonderful. I'm going to need volunteers."

"I wish you good luck with that. Everyone here knows what's waiting for them."

"There has to be someone who likes the snow."

"Snow and a frozen wasteland are two different things, as you've been so kind to point out in the past."

"Perhaps the others don't know that."  
"You always were an optimist, Yuan."


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note:** The last few days before school starts. I'm so sad. But it does mean that I can start reading Howl's Moving Castle since I promised myself that I would save it for the first day of school, since it is classically a boring day and week.

Got a piano recital on Sunday that's making me nervous as hell, even if I know the song I'm playing so well. It's Phantom of the Opera and I can't seem to get the pedaling right.

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/ 

_Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis_

-/-/

"This is strange. You don't usually stick around for these meetings." Anna comments when she comes into the room that would eventually become a hangar for the inter-dimensional vehicles. Kratos was sitting on a bench in the very back, a bowl of something in his lap.

"No, but I thought I should stay for this one." Kratos holds out the bowl as Anna sits down. "Would you like some blackberries? Apparently they're in season in Triet."

"I don't understand how anything can be in season in a town that's smack in the middle of the desert." Anna says as she nibbles on one of the small fruits. She'd never gotten the hang of putting the whole thing in her mouth without choking on the seed. "Maybe it's the oasis."

"That could be it."  
Kratos seemed in a much more amiable mood than normal and Anna had a very strong suspicion that it had something to do with the meeting. "So what's this meeting about?"

"You act as if I'm supposed to know."

"Don't play dumb, Kratos. It doesn't suit you. You and Yuan share everything. So, what's going on?"  
"Yuan believes that there will be volunteers to help build the other base in Tethe'alla."

"The one in the middle of the frozen wasteland?"  
"Technically, it's closer to the outskirts, but yes."  
Anna chuckled. "And you told him that there wouldn't be any volunteers?"

"I told him that it was a strong possibility."  
"So you're here to say 'I told you so' after he realizes that no one wants to build a base in below freezing weather?"

"Precisely."

"An excellent reason for sticking around."

Yuan was climbing atop a chair so that everyone could see him and Anna smiled at the sight. It seemed so strange that the two men who were, at best, average height, were the deadliest in a room full of taller people.

"I'm sure that I don't need to repeat the whole explanation on why we need another base in Tethe'alla." The assembled rebels murmured their no's and shook their heads. "If you don't know already, for the inter-dimensional transfer technology to work, the other base has to be located specifically in the continent of Flanoir in Tethe'alla. The Flanoir continent is…rather cold. Actually, it snows year-round there. Are there any volunteers to help with the building of the base?"  
There were several long heartbeats before Anna had to clap a hand over her mouth, nearly choking on her laughter. Yuan looked around hopefully for even a single hand raised before letting his eyes drift back to the two in the back.

"Really? Nobody?"

"Sir, to be quite honest, it's insane." Botta said from near the front.

Yuan sighed. "And if there was some bonus pay involved?"

None of the Renegades actually got paid, but then, they didn't usually need money. It was sort of a communal fund that everyone used to pay for any specific needs like clothes or specific foods.

At that, someone called out, "What are the exact details of helping build this base?"

"The same ones as it was to build this base except it'll be in the snow rather than in the sand." Kratos answered and Yuan sighed. He'd hoped Kratos would phrase it delicately, but apparently not.

"…Are there going to be as many people helping?"  
"More, actually." It was sad, but there were more disgruntled half-elves in the flourishing world when they should have had more opportunities. A few tentative hands were raised. "Excellent. Those of you raising your hands, see me later and I'll tell you how this is going to go."

Most everyone dispersed from the room and Yuan made a beeline for the two sitting on the bench sharing a bowl of cherries. "Thanks so much for the support." He said sourly. "And you didn't even have the decency to save me some?"

"Well you didn't say you wanted some, now did you?" Anna said. "And I'm not sure how you expect us to make a frozen wasteland so appealing."

"Not even Celsius Day songs can do that." Kratos added.

"So neither of you wants to come?"

"I don't believe I have much of a choice." Kratos said. "Don't you need my help for the foundation? Again?"  
"That wasn't what I asked."

"I'll help out." Anna offered. "It's been a while since I've seen snow and I wanna see what Tethe'alla's like anyway."

"That curiosity of yours is going to get you killed one day." Yuan tells her.

"I'm not a cat, Yuan."

"We're going to need to set up some kind of deal with the inn at Flanoir." Yuan said, nudging Kratos so he would scoot over, allowing him some space at the edge of the bench. "Sleeping in the desert at night is one thing, but we'll freeze to death if we sleep out there."

"I'll take care of that. Your magical and technological skills are going to be needed quite a bit for this base."

"That's right…I need to find some way so that the pipes don't freeze." Yuan cursed softly under his breath. "This is just another item on the list of why I hate snow."

"Well, all you really need to do is just do everything you did for this base, but the opposite." Anna said. "Instead of a way to keep the heat out of the building, you need to be able to insulate it. And you need a power source, I guess."

"Heat won't work this time, I suppose." Yuan rubbed at his temples. "This means a hell of a lot more research."

"At the very least, you won't need to concern yourself with an invisibility spell on that base." Kratos pointed out. "No one goes up there to just wander around and considering where the base is going to end up, no one's going to really be able to find it either."

"A camouflage of some kind would help a ton, now that I think about it. In case any of Cruxis decide to go looking or flying above it."

"That doesn't too hard to do." Anna said.

"Celsius…"

Kratos looked sideways at his best friend. "What does she have to do with this?"

"Do you think she'd be willing to power the base?"

"I highly doubt it. Efreet most likely wouldn't have stooped to it either, but heat is a form of energy, no matter what you do. Ice, on the other hand, is rather the opposite."  
Yuan snarled softly in frustration before asking, "Summon Spirits…do you think their powers can cross over the worlds?"

"Logically, yes." Kratos replied slowly as he thought it over. "Gnome's power is still affecting Sylvarant with gravity and there's still snow here, and shadows. There's oceans in Tethe'alla, as well as fires and light. Why?"

"The Sylph…wind is a source of energy. We can set up some sort of windmill system to power the base. Heaven knows that the winds near Flanoir are powerful enough."  
"You're also going to have to get your hands on a few boats." Kratos told him. "There's no other way to transport so many people to and from Flanoir."

Yuan pushed Kratos with his shoulder, hard. It resulted in Kratos bumping into Anna, which nearly sent her sprawling with the force. "Don't remind me." Yuan said grumpily. "You know I hate boats."

"Well, until you get those inter-dimensional vehicles of yours functioning, you're going to have to put up with quite a few of them."  
"They really need proper names. Any ideas?" Anna asked.

"Not a one." Yuan clapped Kratos on the shoulder. "My dear friend, I am designating you that duty."

"I seem to get that duty a lot."

"Is there any other reason I keep you around?"

"So you can lay the foundation yourself? Wonderful. Less trouble for me. Perhaps I'll visit Altamira to meditate on the name while listening to the waves crash on the shore while you all are working so hard on that base of yours."  
"No need for that, Kratos." Yuan said hurriedly. "And really, Altamira isn't that great at all."

"It's warm. Has a beach."

"That's really all that's there for now. And you know that there's quite a great deal of construction going on there, what with building all of the new resort or whatnot that the head of Lezareno decided that it needed."

"Another lovely beach, ruined." Kratos agreed. "Now there will be tourists swarming through it all once all of the construction is done."

Anna chuckled. "Even with all that, Altamira still sounds like a pretty place. There aren't many beaches you can actually visit in Sylvarant."

"There's Izlood." Yuan said.

"I guess. But there never seems to be time to actually sit and _enjoy_ the beach, y'know? There's always something going on."

"How about this then—once this base gets built, we'll take you to the beach. A real beach. Even get you a swimsuit." Yuan eyed her critically. "What do you think, Kratos? Bikini or one-piece?"  
Anna's face flushed, but she wasn't sure if it was from anger or embarrassment. "Forget it. I can just go swimming in my underclothes, like everyone else does." Or at least, that was how they used to do it in Luin. Most of the time, they couldn't afford swimsuits. They weren't popular in Sylvarant.

"Consider it a birthday gift." Yuan knew that Anna was practical, but it wouldn't kill her to accept a gift. "Now that I think of it, when _is_ your birthday?"

Anna is horrified for a moment that she doesn't remember. She doesn't remember ever _having_ a birthday. She knew she had one, obviously, but she can't remember even what month it was, or what time of year.

It must have shown on her face because Yuan asks Kratos, "Do you remember when it was that you first broke her out?"

Kratos cast his mind back. It had been nearly five months since then, so… "It was April, I do believe."

It seemed like both a long time ago and also right behind them.

"What's today's date?"

Anna remembered the calendar that Doria had in the kitchen. "The…twenty-third, I think."

"Congratulations, Anna." Yuan said and both Kratos and Anna looked at him oddly. "You've got a new birthday. April twenty-third."  
Anna's chuckles turned into full-blown laughs, though she wasn't sure what was so funny. Perhaps it was the irony of the circumstances. She couldn't remember very much of her old life, can remember too much of her time in the cell regardless of whether or not she wants to, and she emerged from the cell a different person than the one who'd gone in. A harder person. It seemed fitting that a new birthday went along with it.

"I suppose I should inform Doria of this wonderful event so she can make you a special dinner." Yuan said as he stood.

"Dammit, Yuan, you don't have to do that…and he's not listening to me."

"Does it bother you?" Kratos inquired. "What he did?"

Anna looks back at him. "No, I suppose not. It just feels a bit weird. It's not everyday that you get a new birthday and all. Has he ever done that before?"

"Give someone a new birthday?"

"Mm."

"Actually, I believe this is a first." There weren't many firsts for them anymore. "And you're sure you're okay with it?"

Anna hummed in thought. "Yeah, actually. I like it, It's a nice feeling to know your birthday."

Kratos chuckled a little, but stood. "Well, in that case," Kratos prayed that she wouldn't punch him for this. "Happy belated birthday." He brushed a kiss on her forehead.

Anna sat there, a little stunned. Kratos rarely did anything intimate like that and certainly not for anything not life-threatening. But before she could say anything_,_ not that she knew what she would have said, Kratos was already across the room, speaking to Botta.

-/-/-/-

Kratos and Yuan are in Flanoir two hours later after having taken the back areas of Derris-Kharlan to avoid detection because, technically, Kratos was still a suspected traitor who was supposed to be in Sylvarant searching for proof.

"I heard something interesting from Botta before I left." Yuan said casually as he checked the quality of the scarves. With so many people coming to Flanoir to build the base, they all needed warm clothes of the sort that weren't found anywhere else.

"And what would that be?" Kratos asked as he checked the list that they'd made with everyone's clothing sizes.

"He said that you kissed Anna. I'm a little disappointed that you didn't tell me first."  
"You gossip like an old woman. And don't get too excited. It was a kiss on the forehead, nothing more."

"It's still progress." Yuan draped several thick scarves over his arm. "What did she do?" The silence on Kratos' end made the half-elf turn towards him. Kratos was facing away from him, but Yuan had known him for far too long. He read the body posture, the hunch of the shoulders and the lines of tension in his arms. "You ran?"

"I did not."

"I meant it metaphorically. I think even you have too much pride to run from something like that." Yuan chuckled. "You really haven't changed."

"I know where you sleep, Yuan. Remember that."

"Yes, yes. If I continue with my teasing, you'll string me up by my toenails and have my head on a platter. But don't worry. I'm sure Anna is going to be frustrated by you and I'll most likely hear about it from her. But I didn't hear you protesting earlier, during the beach part of our conversation."

"You didn't hear me agreeing either."

"It was a silent agreement. I've become very adept at silent conversations after knowing you for so long."

"…Don't forget to get yourself something warm." Kratos reminds him, not wanting to dwell on the subject any longer. Just because they couldn't feel the cold, couldn't feel the pain of the frostbite, didn't mean that it didn't affect them.

-/-/-/-

They get back too late for dinner, but not for cake. Anna is shifting uncomfortably as Doria sets down a cake in front of her. Not everyone fits inside the kitchen and there are people standing out in the garden and in the hall.

Anna meets Kratos and Yuan's eyes through a gap in the crowd and they can only shrug helplessly. When the gap closes again, Yuan leans in and says to Kratos, "Well, at least she doesn't seem mad at you."

It seemed as if everyone in the room knew a different version of the birthday song and they sang at different paces or added words in. They all ended at different times, but they applauded and the cake got divvyed up so that everyone got an equal share, even though it wasn't that large.

Anna manages to weave through the crowd back to them and they get their first good look at her since they got back. Clearly, some of the women had gotten to her and she was wearing another dress. This one was pale lavender and had a lower neckline than the green one. She'd done something to her hair to make it straighter, making it long enough to nearly touch her shoulder blades.

Seeing their eyes on her, Anna said, "Not my choice."

"I'd be asking what this imposter had done with the real Anna had that been the case." Yuan said. "What did the other ladies threaten you with to get you to do it?"

"I figured it was better not to know the details. They're downright frightening." Anna held out her small plate of cake. "Does either of you want it?"

"You don't like cake?"  
Anna shook her head. "I'm a pie person."_ (She remembers that much, and has a sudden memory of sitting on the pier and sharing a boysenberry pie)_  
Yuan took the plate and poked a small piece with the fork. "Your loss."

"I'm starting to think you planned this whole thing so you could have it."

"If that were the case, I would've gotten here in time for dinner. What did we miss?"  
"Some kind of goose and rice concoction. It tasted pretty good, but it made Botta a little sick, so he passed on the cake."

Yuan searches the crowd for his second-in-command and finds him sitting outside sipping at some soda water and looking a little pale. "Must've been quite a goose."

One of the men comes up behind Anna, tapping her on the shoulder and asks her to dance. The man's married with a child on the way, but loyalty was strong in the base. His wife had no need to worry.

"No, I'm not much of a dancer." Anna says.

"It's a tradition." The man insists. "Bad luck follows on birthdays if you do not dance."

Anna has spent enough time around the inhabitants of the base to know that stubbornness was another requirement of being in the Renegades, along with loyalty, and she sighs before taking his hand.

Yuan waits until she's out of earshot and being twirled across the dance floor to say conversationally to Kratos, "So when are you going to ask her to dance?"

"You're pushing it, Yuan."

"Just a suggestion. This time it's a married man who's asking her to dance. What happens when it's a guy her own age who's sweet on her?"  
"Then it's all the better for her."

"But not better for you."

"I think I'll live." Kratos doesn't like the idea, but he won't interfere if Anna tries to live a normal life.

"No. You'll exist. Live, not so much."  
"That cake is spiked with something if it has made you this philosophical."

"Possibly." Yuan admitted. "But if it _is_ spiked, there isn't enough to affect me. And that doesn't make me wrong."  
"I'm very glad it takes so much to get us well and truly drunk now, or else I'm sure I'd be hearing much worse things."

"Could you imagine that? I might even get drunk enough that I'd announce your troubles with Anna to anyone who'd listen."

"I don't give into blackmail, Yuan."  
"Would I do such a thing?" He said, smirking a yes.

"Absolutely."

-/-/-/-/-/

**Other A/N: **I have never before seen snow. Actually, it hardly gets below 60 degrees here, so if somebody can help me out with what you're supposed to wear when it's that cold before the next chapter, that'd be great.


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note:** School is just…argh. Got Marine Bio this year, so not so bad. Love the class. Algebra 2 is gonna suck on principle. History might be interesting, depending on how my teacher decides to do the class. So far, 3D Composition is the most interesting class. I'm planning on making _Serenity _from Firefly and Howl's Moving Castle. No idea how exactly I'm gonna do it, but it's still in the planning stages.

Just finished Howl's Moving Castle (the book). It was interesting, but I'm not sure which one I like more, the movie or the book. They're both excellent works, but they're different in ways that makes me question it.

Gotta find some new stuff to read. First week of school and I'm out of books. This can't bode well. Any suggestions?

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/ 

"_Never doubt that a small group of committed people can change the world. _

_Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has."_

_-Margaret Mead_

-/-/

"Botta, we can handle this if the snow bothers you that much." Yuan said to his second-in-command. They're sitting with another half a dozen people in the shelter of a rock formation that Kratos had set up for them. Really, Kratos had made a kind of small cave, closed on all but one side, fairly deep and roughly triangular in shape. It blocked out the wind and helped with the cold. They'd been working for a few hours already and they'd needed a break.

Botta glanced at him. His eyes are only visible above the thick scarf. His arms were crossed and he shifted from foot to booted foot. "Sir, I have nowhere to go. Half-elves are at the bottom of the social caste in Tethe'alla, or so you've told us, and we only made it here because we pretended to be your prisoners and we nearly didn't get away with that."  
Yuan looked him over. Yuan knew that his ears weren't as obviously triangular as many half-elves and Botta had the misfortune to look more elven, but the beard would give him away. Elves didn't grow facial hair.

"I wish I could say I could get you to Exire somehow."

Botta's brow furrows, though it's not entirely noticeable because his wool cap is pulled down low over his forehead. "You've mentioned that before, but you haven't actually explained what it is."

Yuan doesn't look at him when he replies, which lets Botta know that his leader is in a place of old memories in which there was no place for him. "Exire used to be the capital of Tethe'alla." Botta can understand very easily that Yuan means the country Tethe'alla, not the world. The country that he's fairly certain Yuan lived in before he became involved with the Kharlan War. "After the War, the city had been attacked several times. But it was already being rebuilt by the time that our Cruxis Crystals had activated."

By the time that Martel died and all of this began.

"The only people who knew of the truth behind the Exspheres and their evolution at the time were the Tethe'allan King and a few of his scientists who had been studying them. Mithos knew that, if he wanted his plan to work, none of the secrets must get to the public. The first step was to get rid of the witnesses." Yuan swallowed. He was ashamed of many things that he'd done in the name of Mithos and Cruxis, but this one had been one of the hardest. They'd betrayed their country, their King who had been so kind. A _good_ King. "Each of us took a different part of the castle and set it to burn before creating a barrier so that no one could get out."

There had been no survivors that day. Sometimes, Yuan is glad he can't sleep because he can still remember the charred remains of the people he'd made friends with, had fought in the war with.

"The next step took a great deal of magic," And luck, Yuan remembers because it had been the first experimentation of the Eternal Sword and Maxwell's power and none of them had been sure it would even work. "Because the King was dead and there was so much chaos going on in the country, a lot of the half-elves were being attacked. He managed to convince a majority of the half-elves living in the capital that he could get them to a safe place. He got them in the castle believing that it was for a meeting.

"They never saw it coming. With the help of Maxwell and the Eternal Sword, Mithos tore the castle and some of the surrounding area from the ground, and it was with a combination of Gnome and Maxwell's power that it stayed floating aboveground. But something went wrong halfway through and only half of the castle came. It's that half that's still floating and is now called the city of Exire, a refuge for half-elves. But the other half was the basis for Mithos' castle in Derris-Kharlan."  
Yuan can picture Yggdrasill sitting on his throne very easily and he always hated seeing him like that because he remembered going to see their King on that throne, remembered sunlight streaming through stained glass windows and voices echoing. But things don't echo in Derris-Kharlan and there was no sunlight.

"You're t-telling me that Exire is a f-floating city in the sky?" Botta says, voice dubious even with the slight stutter. The cold was beginning to affect him.

"You make it sound like it's the craziest thing you've ever heard."

It was a sentence that should have been said with a smile or, on a more open person, a playfully wounded expression. But when Yuan said it, there was only a kind of terrible calm and stillness that Botta hated about him. It was one of the few times you could truly see that he was no longer anything remotely of the earth anymore because nothing in either of the worlds could make themselves so still, so untouched by anything.

"It's certainly high on the list."

Someone ducked into the makeshift cave. "It's nearly dark, sir. I'm not sure how far it is to this Flanoir place, but-"

Yuan stood, dusting himself off. "Don't worry. I get it. Go ahead and tell everyone to finish what absolutely has to be finished before tomorrow and that we have to get going."

They all make their way back outside, pulling scarves and coats tighter around them. The bare skeleton of the first floor of the new base was up. People were sitting up high on beams, passing materials to each other and carrying the new support beams.

It doesn't surprise Yuan that Kratos is the first to see him come out. "Tired of freezing your people?" He says mildly.

"What good would half-elven popsicles do me?" Yuan replied, gloved hands stuffed deep in the pockets of his coat.

"You're the mastermind here, not me."  
"That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen."

They both turned to Anna, bundled up in thick pants and several coats, gloves and scarves, the little skin that could be seen was pink and nearly raw from the cold.

"You have so much faith in me, don't you?"

"Yuan, y-you have us working out in below z-zero weather. That doesn't s-speak to me of a leader that actually thinks these things out, y'know."

"It wasn't my choice." Yuan told her, arms crossed as their boots crunched through the snow. He can hear the others talking over the strong winds, but just barely. It struck him that this could be dangerous if any of them were in trouble. "We've been over this. It's all Kratos' fault."

"So quick to blame me." Kratos said.

"You t-two are c-complete children sometimes." Anna told them. "S-shouldn't you have grown up by now?"

"We're frozen in time, Anna." Yuan reminds her. "Of course we haven't grown up."  
"Well the rest of us are freezing literally."

"Flanoir isn't far."

-/-/-/-

Anna knocks before pushing the door open with her back. "You're missing out on hot chocolate." She says.

Kratos looked up, almost as if he hadn't heard her come in, but he must have. His hearing was incredible and Anna was naturally unable to be stealthy. "I had actually forgotten about it."

"An incredible thing, but that's what Yuan said had happened. We were all under the impression that it would be a crime if you didn't get some before the inn ran out." Anna said, crossing the room, holding out a mug.

Kratos folded down the corner of the page of his book before setting aside so he could take the mug. "Thank you."  
Anna had to turn her head at a slightly awkward angle to read the title of the book. Or try to, at least. "What language is that?"

Kratos glanced down. It was the language that everyone had used to communicate when he was a child. With the mixtures of the various races so close together, they'd found one language that had a few elven symbols, a dwarven rune was somewhere in there, and the various human dialects. But it had never really been given a name.

When Kratos explained that to her, Anna carefully picked up the book and thumbed through it. The pages were yellowed and soft with age, the ink fading and, in some places, completely gone. There were spots that the pages became crisp and slightly wrinkled, as though water had been dripped there.

The illustrations were done in careful detail. Pirates were forever caught in a fierce sword duel. Adventurers were looking down a cave tunnel, their torches never to be extinguished. Fierce magicians were surrounded with their magic and rogues danced with fair maidens.

"Is this a collection of stories?" She asks, trying to see if she could recognize any of the words.

"No. It's all one book."

"But none of the pictures even make sense with the other ones."

"It was one of the great classical adventure stories of the time."  
Anna flips to the back, where it's the classic picture of the riding off into the sunset. "Doesn't seem so special. It looks like every other fairy tale where the princess falls in love with the prince at first sight and they live happily ever after." She tilted her head at him. "Doesn't seem like your taste in books."  
"Most of the time, it isn't. This book was given me on Celsius Day the year that I turned eleven."

"You remember back that far?"

Kratos turned the book to the front inside cover and pointed. "It was the first Celsius Day after I met Yuan."

In wobbly letters, it read '_Happy Selcius Day, Kratos—Yuan.'_

"Was he not a very good speller?"

"Not at that time. He was only just beginning to learn how to read, you see."  
Anna sensed a story there, but decided not to push it. This was another look at the _personal_ things. She found it fascinating.

"But I don't understand why you would read something that you've already read that ends so predictably."

"You make it sound as though you do not believe in love at first sight." Kratos observed.

Anna snorted, her eyes still wandering the pages. "Not likely. It's a children's tale. Don't tell me you believe in it, Kratos?"

"On the whole, absolutely not. But I have seen a case where it fit the description of children's tales."

"…Was it Yuan and Martel?"

"Yes…yes it was." They hadn't admitted anything right away, but the chemistry had been there from the beginning and they'd never denied anything for each other.

"So if those love-at-first-sight romances aren't your kind of thing, why read this?" Anna asked, holding up the book.

"That book is much more than a romantic story."

"How so?"  
"There is fencing and fighting. Escapes, pirates, some torture."

"It sounds so cheerful." Anna said.

"That's not all of it. There are miracles and true love as well as giants and forest spirits."

"You're defending this book quite a lot."

"It's a favorite of mine."

"…Can you read it to me?" When Kratos quirked a questioning eyebrow, Anna elaborated. "Well, obviously I can't read it and since you say it's just that good of a story, why not?"  
"If you really want."

Anna handed him the book and leaned back so that she could sit cross-legged on the bed, but still watch Kratos at his seat on the windowsill. She wraps one of the spare blankets that the inn provided around her shoulders and Noishe hopped up beside her, resting his head right by her thigh.

Kratos flips the book open to the first page and begins to read. Anna had never thought about it before, but Kratos' voice was rather nice. Quiet, with a gentle cadence and occasionally there would be traces of an accent she's never heard.

They're several chapters in when Kratos stops and studies her. "We should stop here. You're falling asleep."

"'M not." Anna said sleepily. "I wanna know what happens next."

Kratos folds down the corner of the page, sets the book down and stands so that he can gently push Anna so that she's lying down. "Sleep." He orders, though it comes out more lovingly exasperated than commanding.

"Pushy bastard." Anna mutters, smiling. But she does as he says, Noishe curling around her as extra warmth.

-/-/-/-

Yuan opens the door to Kratos' room early the next morning, long before anyone was awake. He takes one look at Anna and Noishe curled up on the bed before Kratos is walking with him outside in the hallway.

"Congratulations." Yuan says, smirking. "You managed to get her in your bed."

Kratos glared at him. "You are determined to make more of this then there is, aren't you?"

"It is the sworn duty of best friend to care about the details no one else can because you refuse to admit them."

"I'm so honored." Kratos says sarcastically.

"As well you should be." Yuan tells him tartly. "So why was she in your room at all?"

"She brought hot chocolate and I was reading. She got curious and asked me to read the book to her."

Yuan frowned. "I was under the impression that Anna already knew how to read."

"She does."

"So why did you have to read it to her?" Yuan asked slowly. Kratos explains the situation in more depth and Yuan 'oh's. "That makes much more sense…You still have that book?"

"Of course I do."

"I'll have to borrow it then." It was one of those books that had to be reread and every time you read it, you found something new about it.  
"Steal it you mean."

"It isn't as though you couldn't find it on your own if you really wanted it back."

Kratos can't argue that point. He knows Yuan too well and knows all of his hiding places.

"She didn't just outright ask you to read to her, did she?" It seemed like a rather forward thing to ask just out of the blue, even for Anna.  
"Of course not. She believed it to be another fairy tale book. I had to prove to her that she was wrong."

"Naturally." When Kratos didn't offer any more information, Yuan narrowed his eyes at him. "What aren't you telling me?"

"Nothing."

"Liar."

"There may or may not have been some discussion on the existence of love at first sight." Yuan stared at him. "What?"

"You two managed to actually have a sane, sober conversation on love?"  
"You make it sound like it's so impossible."

"Kratos, my dear friend, as much as I care about you, you've been known to be rather…obtuse…about that particular subject."

"Thank you for the vote of confidence." But Kratos knew it was the truth. Yuan had that peculiar streak of absolute honesty in him.

"You're welcome."

They don't say anything after that, simply staring out at the snow through the frosted window glass.

_…on the existence of love at first sight…_ Yuan doesn't have to pretend he doesn't remember how it was with Martel, when he first saw her. He's tried to make himself forget that it ever happened because the pain simply got that bad sometimes. But he never can. He remembers her all too well. Remembers how she would smell of herbs and the outside. How she laughed openly. Remembers the melody of her favorite song that they only danced to once.

Those memories are old, long dusty and faded. Sometimes, he finds that he can't remember the exact shade of green that her eyes were or the color of her dress. He finds that he dreams in black and white now, in shades of gray. The present is in its vivid colors, but once he memorizes them (As was the wont of his excellent memory) their colors begin to fade like that of an old photograph. _(Like the only photos that Yuan owns from those times. They're gray with four frozen, identical smiles and the youths are forever locked in their casual hugs)_

-/-/-/-

Anna helps hold up the sheets of polycarbonate while they're nailed into place. Botta, right beside her and helping, mentions that he saw her coming out of Kratos' room this morning.

She rolls her eyes. She should've known that something like that would have gotten blown out of proportion. "It w-was nothing."

Botta leans forward to study her face. "You're blushing."

Anna glares at him. All of their cheeks are pink and red and their skin raw from standing out in the snow for hours and Botta knew that. "No, I'm not."  
"If you s-say so. Wh-why didn't you share a room with the other w-women?"

"I was g-going to. I visited Kratos and fell asleep." She doesn't need to look at Botta to know that he's smirking at her. Really, he's spent too much time with his leader.

-/-/-/-

The instant they all step into the inn, there are always at least four people that make a beeline to begin ordering some hot chocolate from the kitchen for everyone. Others go up to their rooms to change out of their wet, cold clothes. After everyone is done with their business, they meet downstairs to get their share of the chocolate and sit on the couches and tables in the lobby.

Anna sits with her legs tucked behind her on the couch, listening to the voices that had become so familiar these past months complain and jibe playfully at each other. The couch sinks beside her and Anna looks over to see Kratos sitting beside her.

"How have you been finding Tethe'alla?" He asks, leaning back comfortably.

"Very cold, if you can believe it." Anna replies, smiling.

"I've heard that quite a few times since we got here. Besides the cold, how do you find it?"

"I like it." She says. "It's nice to not have to worry about someone recognizing me on the street and everything here is just so…different, but at the same time, it still feels a bit like home. Does that make any sense?"

"Is it bad that I understood all that you just said?"

Anna pokes him with her toe, laughing. "You can be a bastard sometimes, y'know that?"

"I have heard that."

Anna settles back against the arm of the couch, sipping at what little was left of her hot cocoa. "So what brings you down to mingle with the commoners?"

"I was in the mood for something more…lively…this evening." That was only partially the truth. He'd had to go to Yggdrasill to show him the forged papers. Anna always seemed to help him forget the taint that Derris-Kharlan left on his mind.

Anna watches as there's a loud groan of disappointment at one of the tables where some of the guys were playing cards. One of them must have had a losing hand. "Well, this is certainly the place. Do you, by any chance, know what else there is in Flanoir?"

"What are you talking about?" Kratos asks. His mug of hot chocolate that had been half-shoved in his hands by one of the new recruits from Exire had long gone cold, but he had no concept of that kind of thing anymore.

"Well, if I never come back to Tethe'alla, I want to see as much of Flanoir as I can. Do you know what else there is in this city?"

"…That would depend on the date."

"It's the twenty-first of November. Why?"

"I believe that there might be a special service in the Church. Today was the death of a great religious leader in Flanoir."

Anna's eyes are unreadable as she looks at him over the rim of the mug. Kratos isn't sure whether he's entirely comfortable with not being able to read her. "Was there really a religious leader or did you make him up too?"

"We didn't make them up. After we…rewrote the history and created the Church of Martel, we kept careful watch over the worlds for the next few centuries to make sure that there weren't any inconsistencies, that there hadn't been some detail that we forgot that would give us away. Spiritua was born and died in that time. After those centuries, we didn't interfere as much in the world."

"No, you just had the worlds on your strings."

Anna's clear hatred of what they'd done made Kratos remember just why they were out here in the snow, building this base. Why they'd gone through all this trouble and why he couldn't go back to Cruxis, even if it was easier.

Anna knows he's changed since those days—she thinks he has anyway—but she still instinctively wants to snarl at him for what he's done. She still can't summon that same anger or hatred for Yuan, who had done all of the same things. She doesn't know why.

Anna sighed. "…So who is this religious leader?"  
"Get your warm clothes on and I shall tell you while we walk."

-/-/-/-/-

Anna has never seen anything like Flanoir. It's difficult to see the stone foundation of the city through the several inches of snow. The sloped rooftops aren't like anything they have back home and the houses all look either too narrow or too wide. There are small alleyways and crannies that she can sometimes see small children running through or young couples sitting on doorsteps and holding hands.

"She was called Alastrina." Kratos begins. "At the time, there were other towns out here other than Flanoir. They were small ones, but they were there. Tethe'alla was the declining world at the time. There wasn't enough food and out here, that becomes a real problem because they're so isolated from the other continents. Alastrina was a missionary from Ozette. She came to Flanoir to help with the famine.

"The people here didn't trust her at first. They believed that she was another hopeless missionary that couldn't help. She spent almost a half a year living on this continent, living in the local churches. She watched as children and families who couldn't get enough to eat starved to death. When she'd finally had enough, she went to Meltokio to discuss with the King-"

"I thought Tethe'alla was in decline then?" Anna interrupted, "No central government and things like that."  
"It was in decline. But the Sylvarant that you know is a unique case. It has been in decline for much longer then it ever has been."

"Why not change it yourself then, instead of watching people suffer?" Anna absentmindedly hops up onto one of the low walls that were abundant in Flanoir, teetering left and right to keep her balance.

"I asked a similar question to Yggdrasill, not long before I met you. He didn't give me a straight answer."  
"And you didn't push it." Anna guessed. She wasn't sure why she couldn't blame him for that. But then, Mithos had been friends with Kratos. Had been his student. And Kratos was not as hard a man as he claimed to be. He couldn't kill him. Or wouldn't.

"No, I didn't."

"So what happened when she went to go see the King?" Anna asked. When they'd left, Kratos had told her that she would see the church from a mile away and that she'd know it when she saw it. He was right. Even though they had several staircases left to climb, people were jogging ahead of them and the church was the highest point in the city.

The stained glass windows glowed from the candlelight inside and its tall spires seemed to rival the clouds. There were families going up the stairs and into the church, all dressed in their best warm clothes.

Kratos stops when Anna does. She's staring at the church and he remembers that it's the grandest building she's ever seen. That Sylvarant had nothing like this. "The King didn't listen to her, of course. He told her that Flanoir was not his primary concern. Meltokio and Sybak were."

"What the hell kind of king was he?" Anna said angrily. "He should be worrying about all of the cities."

"I agree. But the way Tethe'alla was back then was that the cities were more self-governed back then. The King was really more of a figurehead and Sybak was a simple extension of Meltokio in a way. Alastrina was enraged by the King's words, so she ran a petition throughout all of the cities saying that the King should do something.

"She managed to get 3,000 signatures in a week. Then she led a protest march with the people of all these cities that the King had refused to help. The march went straight up to the noblemen's quarters of Meltokio before the guards blocked them.

"In another week, Alastrina organized another march and this time, the march was 25,000 strong. The King couldn't ignore it anymore and began finding ways to spread more food out. It didn't fix everything, but everyone got a fair amount of food and supplies were sent to the Flanoir continent for the first time since before the famine."

Kratos remembers hearing about it on one of his walks through Tethe'alla. He hadn't been down there for a few decades and Cruxis had needed to know what was going in the world.

"So the service is to honor her memory?" Anna asks as they climb up the last few steps, their boots crunching in the snow.

"Yes."

They enter the church, where the pastor is preaching and they find a few seats in the back. Anna lowers her voice to the point where the person beside her wouldn't be able to hear her, but with Kratos' incredible hearing, he wouldn't have a problem. "It's kind of strange to think about it, isn't it? That when people really try, they can change the world like that."

"I suppose." But now that she mentions it, Kratos thinks that she's right. He, Yuan, Mithos and Martel should never, by any means, have been able to negotiate peace between Sylvarant and Tethe'alla, should never have been able to do the world, and worlds, what they did. They'd met by accident and they hadn't known anything about what they were doing. But then, Kratos guessed that that was the way these things happened.

They listen to the service for a long while before Anna leans in to say in his ear, "They speak the same language as we do in Sylvarant. I mean, their accents are different, and some of the words aren't quite the same, but I can understand them. I hadn't thought about that until now."  
"On the whole, that's how it is in Tethe'alla." In truth, only the people of Mizuho had developed their own entire language that was something entirely different from the others, but even then, they were taught the common language from a young age.

"…You have a map of the old world, right?"  
"Mm."

"…When we get back, can I see it? I want to know how Tethe'alla and Sylvarant used to fit together."

"Alright."


	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Finally beat the hippo with a tank in Arc Rise Fantasia. Apparently, it's not a hippo, but that's what it looks like to me, so that is what I shall call it.

Recently been obsessed with Secrets by One Republic and Unknown Soldier by Breaking Benjamin. Although, the whole time I've been writing this chapter, I've had I Won't Say (I'm in Love) from Hercules. Seems to fit very well, no?

Reread The Thief Lord because I really do love that book and then had the urge to watch the movie. Thank you, Youtube. I am officially hating Algebra 2 now on more than just the fact that it's math. The lockers in my school are absolutely retarded, but I suppose I should be used to that by now. But, on the bright note, we've all found each other at lunch (It only took us a week and a half) and our insanities can ensue. :D

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/ 

_You can as easily love without trusting as you can hug without embracing. ~Robert Brault_

-/-/

They leave the church before the service is entirely over, slipping out the way they came in. Unnoticed. Anna can't help but marvel at the city.

"It's like something out of a dream." She says.

Kratos can't dream anymore, can't even sleep and he doesn't remember any of the dreams he used to have. "It doesn't snow in Luin, does it?"

Anna shook her head. "The lake hardly freezes. More like it frosts over." She looks curiously at him. "Where you grew up…what was it like?"

"During the winter?" The memories were dusty and faded and it takes Kratos a moment to remember. "…There was always snow that went up to your knees," Or so he thinks. He'd been a child then and a child's knees were much lower to the ground than those of an adult. "And there was a great deal of dancing and parties on Celsius Day."

"Was it like here? Always snowy?"

Kratos shook his head. "No. The summers were very humid and muggy." But they hadn't cared about that then. What child cares about the weather when school is out and there were games to play? "And in autumn, it rained constantly."

"Does the place still exist?" Kratos frowns in confusion. Anna elaborates. "Like, Asgard and here, these places are really old. Does your hometown still exist somewhere, even if it's only in ruins?"  
"I don't know. I don't think on it often." Kratos confessed. "Once I left home the second time, I never went back."

"The second time?"  
"I had to go to military school." Kratos reminds her.

"Oh yeah..." She was silent for a heartbeat. "…Was home really so bad that you didn't want to go back?"

Kratos stared at her. He'd never thought about the reasons why he left. It had been something instinctive_ (Run…Didn't think I'd leave you here by your lonesome, did you?...Hop on…)_

"Bad…isn't quite the word."

"Strict?"  
"When my father was home, yes. But that wasn't why I left." Kratos searches for the word in his mind. "Home was…very…constrained and close-minded, I suppose are the words."

Anna remembers Yuan saying that he'd been Kratos' slave. "Let me guess; Yuan caused havoc in a house like that."

The corner of Kratos' lips tilted upwards a bit. "To put it lightly."

Anna chuckles and is so concentrated on the things Kratos is telling her_ (It's the most _personal_ things he's ever told her)_ that she isn't paying attention to where she steps. The next thing she knows, the ground has disappeared from beneath her and terror_ (Not true terror, the kind that she remembers only in nightmares. It's the terror that everyone knows when they lean too far back or when they fall)_.

The terror stops as suddenly as it began and Anna blinks as she secures her footing on the icy stairs. One of Kratos' hands are on the small of her back, the other gripping her forearm and he was much closer than he had been moments ago, his red-tinted eyes a foot away from her brown ones.

Kratos has a smart remark, he knows he does. Millennia of spending time with Yuan added to his own natural dry sarcasm made sure of that. But he can't seem to remember any remarks, smart or otherwise, that he might have had.

He carefully releases her and in his attempt to regain his focus_ (She'd looked beautiful in that instant, her scarf having fallen away from her face and brown eyes wide, cheeks pink from the cold)_ doesn't see the way that she determinedly not looking at him when she thanks him.

The walk back to the inn was almost-companionably silent. Almost because they were both not quite looking at each other and that only added to the awkwardness factor.

Once they enter the warmth of the common room, the awkwardness seems to (almost) disappear. Most everyone had gone up to bed and the last few stragglers seemed to be headed the same way. Yuan is sitting on one of the couches, a few papers spread out in front of him.

Kratos is about to ask him what it was that has him looking so annoyed before Anna calls his name. He turns to her automatically. "Yes?"

She smiles and it's a little shy, a little uncertain before she leans up just a little (he was only a little taller than her) and kisses his cheek. "Thanks for tonight."  
She's up the stairs before he completely registers what happened. He sees Yuan put the paper in his hand down, smirking widely. "Shut up." He tells his friend as he goes to sit by him.

Yuan just laughs. "This is the best entertainment I've had in centuries."

Kratos ignores him, studying the papers spread out on the coffee table. "Problems with the vehicles?"

"A few. The inter-dimensional technology's been around for awhile," _(Four thousand years)_ "But the problem is getting these things to work with the technology."

"How long have you been working on this today?" Kratos asks.

"Not long." Yuan lied easily.

Kratos sees the lie immediately. "I'm confiscating these." He tells him. "You need to rest."

"Where would I rest? Since you continue to _insist_ that you and Anna aren't sleeping together and she seems to be quite comfortable in your bed, that inevitably means that you'll take _my_ bed and I, being the great person that I am, will of course let you stay and this means that I'm left without a bed."

Kratos arches his eyebrows. "Are you done with the rant?"

Yuan nods.

"Good. One, we're not sleeping together."

"That's what I said you'd say." Yuan interrupts.

Kratos pretends he didn't hear him. "Two, Anna sleeping in my bed wasn't supposed to happen. She's staying with the other women."

Space in the inn was tight and many of the rooms were doubled up. As there were very few women out here to actually build (Kratos would never suggest that they couldn't do any of the work, but they'd wanted to stay at home because, they said, if the men were the ones taking care of the children for so long, the base would be brought down around their heads) He and Yuan had both told the Renegades that they'd share a room as well to open up one more, but the rebels had shaken their heads.  
_"You're the leaders." _They'd said. _"You deserve your own rooms."_

Yuan leans back, closing his tired eyes. "So…how was your night?"  
"You are determined to be nosy in this matter aren't you?"

"I've told you before; I'm fulfilling the role of best friend. Answer the question."

"It was…fine."

Yuan smiles a little. "Just fine?"  
"_Yes_, Yuan."  
"You went to the church?"  
Kratos narrows his eyes at the half-elf. "You tailed us?"

"Of course not. I've been sitting here working on those damned vehicles, haven't I? But we're in Flanoir in the middle of November. What else is there to do?"

"Very true." Kratos admitted.

"Well, clearly Anna had a nice time on your date."

"It wasn't a date, Yuan."

"Not-date, date, same thing."

Kratos looks sideways at his friend. He still had his eyes closed and his breathing had slowed a little. "You're too tired to think straight."

"No, I said what I meant. _You_ just don't want to see your situation for what it is."

Kratos slid a hand behind his friend's shoulder blades before giving him a hard push so that he was pushed to his feet. "Go to bed, Yuan."

"Yes, mother." Yuan holds out a hand. "You going to bed too or are you going to stay down here and commit tonight to memory so you can daydream about it?"

Kratos accepts the hand up, glaring at him. "You're lucky that I don't like hitting tired people."

"You've never had a problem with hitting people." Yuan argues lazily. "And less of a problem hitting me. You're going soooft."

"You've either drank an enormous amount of alcohol tonight or you're simply that tired. Either way, bed."

"You're grumpy when you've gone soft." Yuan quickly slides into his room before Kratos decides that he's suddenly alright with hitting tired people again.

-/-/-/-

Anna wakes later than usual, which is to say that she wakes up at the same time as the other women. She doesn't know them well and she can't remember all their names, just their faces and their voices. Mostly, they're from Exire and while Anna isn't entirely sure where or what that is, she's curious as to what kind of place it was because those women had a brittle fear to them, but they also had steel in their personality that stopped them from getting pushed around, not that the Renegades really tried.

As Anna began to dress—she'd gotten into the habit of showering after they came in from the cold. A warm shower after hours of working in the snow did wonders—one of the women looks at her oddly.

"Can women become warriors in your world?" She asks.

Anna nods as she puts on the second pair of woolen pants. "Yeah, of course." It wasn't common, but it was perfectly possible. "Why?"

"Your scars." The woman replies honestly. That was something else about the people from Exire; they had a very blunt concept of honesty. It made Anna uncomfortable. True, Kratos and Yuan had their own brand of occasionally vicious honesty, but that was _them_. She'd long since become accustomed to them. "They are rather terrible."  
Anna doesn't reply, pulling on a thick undershirt and thus hiding the worst of the scars on her back. They were little more than white lines now, thin as chalk, but apparently they were enough to bother the others. Kratos and Yuan had done what they could, but even magic couldn't heal everything.

The woman sighs. "I apologize. I am…unaccustomed…to people."

Anna knew how that felt. She still felt uncomfortable when in Sylvaranti towns. Tethe'alla, with its unfamiliar accents and strange clothing, was new enough that Anna couldn't feel uncomfortable at all. "…It's fine. But I'm not a warrior. Not by a longshot."

The half-elven woman's eyes widen. "But…you are muscular, for a woman, and I have seen you arm wrestle with some of the men in the common room and you win!"

"I know how to fight, to defend myself. But there's a difference between that and a warrior."  
"Did your father teach you to fight?"

Anna shakes her head. She can't even remember her father's face, now that she thinks about it. "No. Kratos taught me. And a lot of the people at the Sylvarant base."

"Kratos? The angel?"  
"Yeah."  
"I have seen you with him. You are comfortable in his presence." Here the woman looks almost angry. "How can you be so close to a monster?"  
_"We don't have any illusions of what we are. Anna, we're monsters. What we did was wrong and evil and we know that, but we're trying to change it."_

"You don't know what you're talking about." Anna retorts, fighting the urge to shout. "He's a good man."

"And a monster! He is what has made the worlds into what they are."

"I know that far better than you ever will." After all, the half-elf hasn't seen Kratos cut down a small army of people in mere seconds, hasn't seen his wings. But she also hadn't seen Kratos as the Healer, as the patient teacher. Hasn't seen him the way that he is only when she and Yuan, and occasionally Botta, were around. "But more importantly, he's a good man."

"You're in love with him. You don't see him clearly."

Anna spluttered. "_Excuse_ me? In _love_? With _Kratos_ of all people? Where you guys are getting that kind of nonsense, I'll never know."

"We saw you kiss him last night."

Anna thought about retorting—and oh, how she wanted to—but decided against it. "I'm not having this conversation now."

She stuffs her feet in her boots and grabbing her coat before shutting the door loudly behind her. She very nearly runs into Yuan, who had his fist raised to knock. He observes the look on her face before saying, "Please tell me you're not the only one ready."

"If they didn't decide to gossip instead of dressing, I wouldn't be." Anna snaps, tying her scarf around her neck as she starts down the stairs.

Yuan knocks briskly on the ladies' door once, calling for them to hurry, that everyone was going to head out soon, before catching up with Anna. "Did something happen?" He asks. He knows that she still isn't entirely comfortable with other people, but he'd seen that she was getting better.

She whirled on him, jabbing a finger into his chest. "I blame you for all this."  
"Me?" Yuan said, affronted. "For what? I have no idea what you're talking about."

"It's you and Botta with all of your damn rumors and crazy ideas."

Yuan blinked. Rumors? "You're going to have to be a bit more specific."  
"The rumors that I keep hearing about how, apparently, I'm in love with Kratos."  
Yuan wants to laugh, oh how he wants to laugh. But he knows that if he does, Anna is likely to punch him. So he takes a very deep breath before saying, "You aren't?"  
"I don't know what the hell is going on and I'd appreciate it if I got a chance to figure all this out before other people start telling me what my feelings are."

It's not a yes, Yuan muses, but it's not a flat out no, either. Definitely a step forward for her, though he swears that the both of them needed to stop being so pig-headed.

Yuan holds his hands up in innocence. "Alright, alright. We've had our fun."  
"More than your share of fun."

"Perhaps. Do you still want to work today?"

"Do you guys absolutely need me?"

Yuan shook his head. "Today's more of setting up the final beams before the walls go in."  
"We're really almost done, aren't we?" It's hard for Anna to believe, knowing how complex the other base was.

"We are. And I'll be glad to be able to get out of this blasted cold."

Anna chuckled, her anger momentarily leashed. "You and me both."

"I thought you liked the snow."

"In reasonable amounts. I think I've forgotten any colors other than white right now."  
Yuan smiled. He knew the feeling, especially after knowing Derris-Kharlan as well as he did. "Go ahead and stay in the city today. Get all that aggression out."  
Anna looked him over. He wasn't dressed for the cold. "And where are you headed?"  
His smile became grim. "To Derris-Kharlan. I have to check in with my dear lord."

"Make it back in one piece, alright? Who else is gonna figure out those vehicular doodads for us?"

"Is that really all you think I'm good for? And Kratos has confiscated the plans anyway. Says I work too hard."

"You do." Anna said. She didn't realize someone else said it at the same time until she saw Botta walking up out of the corner of her eye.

"You all are part of some kind of conspiracy to control me, aren't you?" Yuan said, looking back and forth between them.

"I don't think that's the point right now, sir. The boat to Sybak is leaving in an hour sir."  
Yuan sighed. A boat and a trip to Derris-Kharlan. Could his morning get any worse? "Damned Flanoir winds." He muttered as he followed Botta out into the snow. It was a long walk to the dock.

-/-/-/-

"Yuan, so glad you could make it." Yggdrasill's velvety voice was laced with sarcasm.

"I got caught up in my work. I believe a certain someone mentioned that I could stand to get more of it done." Yuan inclined his head, trying to get a closer look at the papers in Yggdrasill's slender hands, though he recognized them immediately. "What're those?"

"Kratos brought them by yesterday. He says that he believes that they are proof of Kvar's treason. But Kratos can be a clever man." Yggdrasill stood from where he'd been leaning on a blackwood desk. "You're familiar with criminal acts, right?"

"Of course." Yuan paused as though he were thinking. "You don't believe Kratos actually forged those?"  
"I wouldn't put it past him if it meant proving his own innocence and taking Kvar down in the process. They never got along well."  
"I don't think Kvar gets along well with anyone."

"Very true. I thought you could take a look at them."  
Yuan takes the papers, already knowing their texture beneath their fingers and he knows the exact lines of the ink. He pretends to study them for a long while, sifting through them and holding them up to the artificial lights.

"These…are absolutely real." Yuan lowered the papers, looking straight in to Yggdrasill's blue-green eyes, empty as a winter sky. "It appears Kratos isn't your traitor."  
"It appears that mortals still have some things that they can still surprise us with."

"Apparently. Would you like me to go pick him up?"  
"Go ahead. I'll find Kratos. I'd like to have a talk with him."  
Yuan isn't sure he likes the sound of that, but there's little he can do. "Can't wait to see that bastard's face when I get down there."

"If I didn't know better, I'd say you hold a personal grudge on Kvar." Yggdrasill observes.

Yuan shoves down the memories of the escaped prisoners, of Anna's wounds. He can't let the fact that he cares show. "The man was slimy all the way through. I never liked him."  
"No one does."

"So why'd you hire him again? I believe I missed that meeting."  
"Clearly you're the voice of reason in this place."

Once upon a time_ (It's how all of their stories start. The ones they can remember, anyway)_ Yuan would have laughed. But ever since the end of the war_ (They can't think of it as Martel's death because that makes it hurt that much more and it means remembering that Mithos wasn't the person they used to know)_ those words had taken on too literal of a meaning and now it is simply a fact, not a teasing joke between friends.

"I'll be sure to attend the next one then." Yuan says before turning to leave. There's only ever been so long that he could stand being in Derris-Kharlan. Especially now that he had been so strongly reminded of just how much life had to offer. Of hot chocolate and card games; sharing dinner with others and good-natured teasing.

-/-/-/-

Kratos was surprised when Yuan took the stairs up into Flanoir three at a time. "What's wrong?"

"Yggdrasill's looking for you."

"What?" But Kratos wasn't the only one that said it. Yuan looks over and sees Anna coming out of the inn. Yuan makes a mental note to ask about their situation later. "Why?"

"I got him to believe that the forged papers were real. I'm supposed to be getting Kvar right now while he finds you so that you can be there while he does…whatever he plans to do…to punish Kvar for 'betraying' Cruxis."

"He plans to search Sylvarant?"

"He wasn't specific, but that might be in there somewhere."

Kratos ran a hand through his hair. "That can't happen. Who knows what he could do."  
"He wouldn't do anything too extreme though, would he?" Anna asks. "I mean, the guy spent all this time building up this organization. He wouldn't give it all away because of just one traitor, would he?"

"It's not the extremes I'm worried about." Kratos told her.

"If he goes fishing around Sylvarant, he might find the base. He might somehow dig up anything on the Renegades and that can't happen. We're not stable enough yet." Yuan explains.

"We can't let him get to Sylvarant." Kratos was quiet for long heartbeats before looking at Anna. "Do you trust me?"

She remembers the last time he asked her that. (_Forgive me, but this needs to be convincing…)_ It's because of that (Or in spite of.) that Anna nods without thinking. "Yeah, of course."

Kratos isn't sure that she's going to feel like that after all of this, but he can only hope. "Come on. I'll explain the plan on the way."


	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Lots of _Guys and Dolls_ and _King and I_ recently. Two of my favorite musicals.

Went to go see Inception again. I've really fallen in love with both the idea of that movie and the movie itself. Also went to Epcot with my brother to see Captain Eo, which has finally reopened.

Watched the White Collar season finale…_holy crap._ I can't wait for the new season in January.

Special thanks to kash30032000 for giving me an idea for a couple of lines in here. :)

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/ "Follow your heart, but be quiet for a while first. Ask questions, then feel the answer. Learn to trust your heart."-Anonymous

-/-/

Even after nearly two months in Flanoir, Anna is certain that she's never seen more white, not anywhere. And it was a very clinical kind of white. Their footsteps echoed off of glass and metal, seeming like the only sound in this place.

Anna shivered, crossing her arms in an attempt to keep warm. "Why the hell's it so cold?" She hissed. Kratos had told her that, for this to work, she had to look like a prisoner again. So her warm clothes had all been left with Yuan and she was left in the undershirt and pants. Not even any boots and the floor here seemed almost as cold as the snow.

"Angels can't feel the cold." He reminded her. "And we're hundreds of thousands of miles above the earth."

Anna walked three steps behind him and finds that she really hates Derris-Kharlan. "You owe me big for this one, Kratos."

He knows he does and he's doing his best to avoid looking at her. He'd seen firsthand the viciousness that the prisoners in the human ranches were subjected to and while he and Yuan could create an illusion to get them through Derris-Kharlan quickly, it wouldn't hold up to a proper inspection. Especially if Yggdrasill might be the one doing the inspection.

_Anna doesn't like the look in Yuan's eyes. "I could be a new prisoner."_

_ Yuan shakes his head. "If prisoners are in Derris-Kharlan, they're there for a good reason. I'm sorry, Anna," Yuan looks sick. "But if this is going to work, the bruises have to be real."_

_ Anna backs away from both of them, her back hitting the door of the inn. "You can't be serious." She trusted them, but there was only so far that that trust could extend._

_ "Anna, you know I wouldn't ask if it weren't absolutely necessary."_

_ She glances at Kratos. "You can't agree with him."  
Kratos looks between them. He loathed the idea just as much as, if not more than, Yuan, but… "I don't like it, but this needs to be done. For the Renegades."_

_ Anna's first instinct, and indeed, her second one, is to say no. But 'for the Renegades' makes her stop to think. All of the Renegades have become a strange, patchwork family now. _

_ They're as gentle as they can, careful to place the bruises where they wouldn't impair any muscle movement in case Anna needed to run or fight. They don't need to actually hit her. They simply press their fingers against her skin using the strength they usually keep in check. They make sure that not all of the bruises actually look finger or hand-shaped and every few bruises, Kratos murmurs an apology._

"Kratos."

Anna and Kratos both turn towards the voice. "Lord Yggdrasill."  
Anna works hard not to gape openly. _That_ man was Mithos Yggdrasill? The person who was, mostly, responsible for the state of the worlds? Kratos' student and friend? Martel's younger brother? She'd expected him to seem more frightening. The man—no, Yggdrasill was most certainly an angel if those brilliantly pink wings were anything to go by—was, for lack of a better word, beautiful. Delicate features were saved from looking entirely feminine by some line of the jaw or angle of his cheeks. His pale blonde hair was longer than anyone's Anna had ever seen, male or female. But his beauty was that of marble statues and ice sculptures. Untouchable and cold.

Fathomless pale blue eyes slide over Anna before switching back to Kratos. "I did not expect to find you here."

"I heard from Yuan about some prisoners that he brought. I became curious."

"…I see. And this one?"

Kratos grips her upper arm and Anna doesn't have to pretend to wince. His grip loosens in immediate apology. "This one apparently snuck by the guards and was sneaking about, attempting to find a way back to the surface. The guards by the cells are incompetent."

Anna has to give Kratos points for excellent acting.

"You and Yuan seem to be much of the same opinion on my staffing. If you would attend the meetings, this wouldn't happen."

"If you kept a closer eye on your people, this entire situation could have been avoided." Kratos says without thinking. He's been agitated since they'd had to hurt Anna and he wasn't watching his words as well as he usually did.

"You have reason to be angry. I did consider you a traitor after all." But Yggdrasill doesn't apologize. He never has. His eyes go back to Anna. "And you…how did you manage to get by the guards?"  
Anna stays tight-lipped.

"A stubborn one?" Anna finds her temper simmering already. Yggdrasill was speaking lazily, as though he couldn't care one way or another.

"Clearly. Where did Yuan find these prisoners?" Kratos' hand is still on her arm and his thumb, moving slow enough that it appeared he wasn't moving at all, was making small, soothing circles.

"He said they were escapees. I'll have to ask Kvar about that when Yuan brings him." Yggdrasill suddenly leans closer to her, hair falling over his shoulder and observes the bruises smeared across her arms and face. "This certainly seems to be within Kvar's particular brand of cruelty."

_If this is going to work, the bruises have to be real._ Anna is suddenly grateful to Yuan. Bruises healed. If Yggdrasill had discovered them, she doubted they'd be able to heal from whatever he came up with.

"Where is Yuan?" Kratos asks, looking around. He doesn't want to see more of Derris-Kharlan. He knows it backwards and forwards anyway, having helped to piece it together with what little resources they'd had at the time.

"He is been lazy as of late." Yggdrasill said. "Though he seemed rather pleased about Kvar."  
"The man is a slimy sort."

The barest ghost of a smile flickered across Yggdrasill's lips. Anna nearly doesn't see it, it's gone so quickly, but in the instant that she glimpses it, she wants to believe that she saw the boy Kratos and Yuan had trained and traveled with. "Yuan said much the same and I'm rather inclined to agree with him."

"I feel so honored." Yuan's voice carried easily through the echoing halls. "The great Lord Yggdrasill agrees with me. This momentous occasion must be honored somehow."  
Anna got the feeling that Yuan and Mithos had never gotten along as well as he and Kratos had. But then, she could understand that. Yuan liked to yank people's chains and the better he knew the person, the easier it was to get them riled and Anna doubted that Mithos had Kratos' patience.

Yggdrasill's eyes slid to Kvar, who walked several steps behind Yuan. His hands weren't bound, but Anna supposes that even if Kvar had tried to get away, Yuan had more than enough speed and skill to catch him. "And so the traitor returns."  
Yggdrasill doesn't know just how ironic that sentence is.

"Lord Yggdrasill, I am no traitor!" Kvar claims.

Kratos moves his hand, still on her arm, in such a way that Anna knows to take a few steps to the side. She won't be entirely hidden, not by Kratos at such close quarters, but there's only so much they can do. Hopefully, Kvar would be too focused on proving his innocence to pay Anna much mind.

"Evidence of your betrayal has already been found." Yggdrasill nods to Yuan, who pulls the forged papers from the folds of his cloak.

"Care to explain these, Kvar?" Yuan says.

The Grand Cardinal snatches the papers from his hands, reading through them. "I have never seen these in my life!"

"An expected response." Yggdrasill, who had been hovering inches above the ground until now, touched down and strode closer to Kvar. The way Yggdrasill moved reminded Anna of a dancer, all smooth grace and long steps. "I suppose you're going to tell me that you've never heard of a half-elven rebellion either?"

"Of course I have! There were spies inside my very own ranch and when we caught and interrogated them, they told us everything." Yuan remembers Kratos speaking to him about a person he believed was a traitor to the Renegades working inside the ranch the day he'd first broken Anna out.

"How convenient." Yuan said, crossing his arms. "An explanation that removes you of all doubt."  
Kvar turned on him. "For all your strength, Lord Yuan, you have yet to see that the traitor stands right before your eyes!" Kvar pointed furiously at Kratos. "That…_human_…is the traitor!"

Yuan arched a brow. "Really? That's what you're going with?" He nods at the papers still in Kvar's hands. "This isn't Kratos' handwriting. It's yours, is it not?"

"Well, yes, but I swear, I have never before written this!"

Anna would have to congratulate Yuan later if they all got out in one piece. He'd made the man himself not recognize his own handwriting.  
"Something tells me you're lying, Kvar." Anna hadn't known just how subtly merciless Yuan could be when he wanted to.

"I'm not!" Kvar seems to finally notice just who was standing beside Kratos. "The Angelus Project!"

Yuan cursed viciously in the privacy of his own mind while Yggdrasill looked at Anna curiously. "This is the Angelus Project?"

"It most certainly is. And the day that it escaped, Kratos was at the ranch. Just the same as he was on the days of the other prisoners escapes."

Yggdrasill looks back at Kratos. "Well?"

"Sir, what good would it do me to betray Cruxis? I see no benefit."

"And," Yuan added, "I think that, if Kratos _were_ to betray us, we wouldn't have been able to trace it back to him so easily."

"Very true." Yggdrasill conceded, but his glittering eyes were still on Kratos, or perhaps on Anna. "And is this truly the Angelus Project?"

"I have no way of knowing." Kratos said. "I was given very few details on the Project."

Yuan turned to Anna, eyes slightly apologetic. He knew how she hated needles. "A simple blood test should find that answer for us."  
Yggdrasill nodded. "Yuan and Kratos, you are in charge of the prisoner. I shall escort Kvar to his cell."

They split up, going in different directions. The seraphim lead Anna into a tall building and they ride the elevator to the fourth floor. After doing a cursory sweep of the halls, they agree that it is quite empty. After all, what kind of angel living on Derris-Kharlan was in need of a medical wing?

"That was close." Anna says as she sits on a stool.

"You've no idea." Yuan replies, looking for a syringe. "Unfortunately, we're really going to have to do this blood test. There's no way around it."

"Can't we just switch my blood with someone else's?"  
"That's part of the problem." Kratos is gently smearing some kind of cream at the bend of her elbow. "There are so few blood tests here that the blood is no longer good. We'd switch with you, but Yggdrasill would know in an instant."

Yuan carefully pushes the needle into her arm and Anna watches with sick fascination as her blood was drained from her. Anna remembers the needles going into her arms at the ranch and how much they hurt, but she'd hardly felt anything but pressure when Yuan did it.

When she mentions this to them, Kratos explains that the cream he'd put on her had numbing properties.

"On the bright side," Yuan says, "It won't be difficult to steal this blood sample later, which could help find out exactly what it was that Kvar did to you to slow the evolution of the Exsphere."

"It'll get noticed." Anna points out. "You said that there aren't many blood samples and a fresh one gone missing is a dead giveaway."

"You're forgetting his talent for twisting things his way." Kratos reminds her.

"Kvar is going to be conveniently close to the blood samples today and I'm certain that he has a few samples left in his ranch from when he was experimenting on you." Yuan thought aloud. "I can change his records on just how many samples he had of yours and when he's found to have an extra one…"

"This whole thing will turn on him." Kratos finished.

"That's great, guys, but there's still no hiding that I have the Angelus Project." Anna said, holding up her left hand. "I'll be sent back to the ranch."

Yuan ran a hand through his hair. "…You're right. There really is no getting around that. But I doubt you'd be sent back to the ranch. Not right away at least. Yggdrasill will want to see for himself how the Project is coming along."  
"I'm not becoming an angel." Anna told them firmly.

"That's kind of the point. You haven't begun the angel transformation, so he'll keep you here to speed it up."

"I have a plan." Kratos said.  
"Have you seen how all of your latest plans have worked out?" Yuan asked.

"This one might possibly work." Kratos rolled up his sleeve. "If we take some of my blood and dilute it with water, it will still retain some of its angelic properties."

"And if we mix it with Anna's blood, it will give the illusion that she's begun the transformation. And since you're human, there won't be any irregularities in the test. None that shouldn't be there, anyway." Yuan got another syringe out of a drawer. "Kratos, this plan of yours might actually work."

Anna doesn't argue on that point because it makes sense. "But," She said, "I'll still be sent to a ranch."

"Kratos, why don't you give the base a call? There are still enough people there to infiltrate a ranch, wouldn't you say? I need to do some stalling."

"Yuan, what are you thinking?"

"I'm thinking that it's time the Renegades did part of the work they've been blamed so much for."

-/-/-/-

"The Project seems to have made quite a bit of progress." Yggdrasill said, looking at the screens. "So far along in the transformation already…"

"Well, we've seen how Kvar treats his prisoners." Yuan said. "That's more than enough suffering to let the Exsphere begin to evolve."

"Very true. And this," Yggdrasill tapped the screen. "Is very interesting."

Yuan leaned closer to read the text. "A mass in her body? Is she ill?"

"It doesn't look like it. I believe that there is a separate Cruxis Crystal growing inside of her body. Whatever Kvar was doing is working."

"He still betrayed us." Yuan pointed out.

"Very true." Yggdrasill leaned back in the chair and folded his finger in a steeple. "…You're good with technology, aren't you?"

As if he didn't already know. "Yes, I am."

"Find Kvar's files on the Angelus Project. We'll allow him to continue with his work until the new Cruxis Crystal is fully developed. Then we'll kill him."

"We're going to kill Kvar?" Kratos asked as he entered the room.

Yuan nodded. "Can't say I'll miss him."

"And where were you?" Yggdrasill asked.

"Checking to make sure Kvar and Ann…the Angelus Project hadn't found a way out of their cells."  
Yggdrasill narrowed his eyes at Kratos. "…Ah yes, you'd mentioned the incompetent security earlier. Send Kvar and the Project back to the ranch. Yuan, be sure to keep a close eye on the going-ons there. If Kvar _is_ working with the rebel organization, he'll be sure to try and contact them somehow. I want information. I want to know who these rebels are."

Yuan nodded. "If it gets me out of paperwork, I'm fine." And it would allow him unrestricted access to Kvar's files which helped the Renegades.

"As for you, Kratos, I want you to search the rest of Sylvarant for these rebels. They must be hiding somewhere."

Kratos nodded. "Sylvarant is only so big. There aren't that many choices."

"If this rebel organization becomes too strong, they could become a threat. I need more than theories this time." Yggdrasill's long pianist fingers are unconsciously drumming against the computer. "I need results."

"Have we ever given you anything but?"

-/-/-/-

She knows this cell, has seen it in her nightmares and remembered it in her waking dreams. It's small and cramped and filthy, but now that she sees it with new eyes, eyes that have seen daylight and freedom and open skies, she finds that the cell is no longer quite as frightening as she once found it to be.

But that doesn't mean that she can sleep in the cell, even though she is tired and all she wants to do us just lie down and try and forget where she was.

Anna doesn't sit still in her cell. It's been almost three days since she saw the white emptiness of Derris-Kharlan. She knew that Kratos had called the base in Sylvarant to get her out, but she also knew that something like this took time. Even if this does make her a bit twitchy, a bit anxious, Anna fights to keep her calm.

_I trust Kratos_, Anna reminds herself.

She practices her forms, slow the first time, fast the second time. Just like she'd seen Kratos and Yuan do it on those many mornings outside the base.

Some of the prisoners remember her and they give her grim, defeated smiles. Anna finds that she doesn't know what to say to them. She can't promise them that everything will be all right and she doesn't want to tell them of the base and the peoples there. Of the wide open spaces and the endless skies. It would only hurt them more.

-/-/-/-

She hadn't realized just how much she'd missed the familiar faces of the Renegades as they usher her out of her cell. They sneak her out, just like before, and Yuan is waiting just outside, half-swallowed by the shadows of the trees.

"We need to stop meeting like this." Anna says when she's right next to him and he chuckles. "Isn't it dangerous for you to be seen here?"

"Yggdrasill seems to have a knack for giving us the perfect covers for this sort of thing. I'm supposed to be keeping an eye out for Kvar."

"I take it I'm not headed back to Tethe'alla then?" Anna asks as she mounts up on a roan mare. She'd been all for the idea of starting their own horse ranch with the deals that their man in Triet gave them, but the idea hadn't caught on.  
Yuan mounted his own horse, a powerful gray stallion and gently presses his heels into the stallion's sides. "Not a chance. Besides, we're nearly finished with the construction and everyone who isn't technologically savvy is coming back here."

"Another prisoner transfer?"  
"Something much simpler actually. Sneak them through."

"Sneak them through? How?"

"I distract Yggdrasill with the details of the experiments on you and Kratos gets the rest through."

"And if he gets caught?"

"I've no doubt that any angels that catch him will be terrified at the very thought of disobeying the great Lord Kratos."

Anna chuckled and breathed deeply the scent of clean, fresh air. Even after only a few days, she'd missed it fiercely.

"…Y'know…Doria's gonna chew you out when we get back." Anna told him.

"I can't wait." Yuan said sarcastically.

-/-/-/-

Doria takes one look at Anna before starting in on Yuan, saying that he'd let her get stuck in that place _again_ and how could he do that to a lady... Anna only grinned at him behind her back and he shot her the briefest of glares.

"Feel free to jump in and deny everything." Yuan tells her and Anna just leans back on the counter in response.

"To be fair, Doria, the ranch was actually the best option at the time." She tells the older woman.

Doria looks between them. She knows their dynamics. While they were friends, however odd the state of friendship was, she also knows that for minor things like this (And when had someone's going to the ranch become minor?) that they wouldn't defend each other without good reason.

"Fine." Doria concedes before looking pointedly at Yuan. "Don't you have a base that needs help getting built?"

Yuan holds up his hands in surrender. "Alright, alright. I can tell when I'm not wanted."

Anna pushes herself away from the counter. "I need a shower. I feel gross."

Doria doesn't question that, simply nods and tells her that there'll be a warm meal waiting for her when she was done.

"Doria...can I ask a personal question?" Anna asks an hour later.

Doria looks at the young woman sitting on one of the kitchen stools, finishing up her helping of apple pie. Anna had come far from the person that had come through the door all those months ago. That person had still been skinny. Not quite to the point of unhealthy, but enough that you knew that she'd gone a long time without a good meal recently and her hair had still had streaks of the blonde dye

"Yes, of course."

Anna pushed around a piece of crust with her fork. "…Did you ever have a family?"

"…Yes. Once."  
Anna looks up at her. "…What happened?"

"We lived in Asgard. I'd been married to my husband for eight years. Our little boy had just turned seven the month that the Desians came. They came to the half-elves' little section of town to 'recruit' us…they took all the healthy males over sixteen. Naturally, they tried to take my husband from me as well.

"…No one fought it. We wanted to, but we knew there was nothing we could do to stop it. My husband refused to help the Desians, so he was taken with some of the other prisoners. My son…Mikal…he ran up to the Desians and demanded that they give him his father back. They gave him two warnings to back away, but…Mikal was always a stubborn one." She swallowed hard, washing the same glass that she'd been washing for the past ten minutes. "They shot him on the spot."

Anna doesn't know what to say to that, doesn't know what she could say. Instead, she asks the question that's the most logical in her mind. "…And your husband?"  
"I never saw him again. That's the way it is with people who get taken to the ranches."

Anna closes her eyes because it feels like she treaded just a bit too far into Doria's past. The topic of Before wasn't one that came up often in the Renegades, Before being the times Before Yuan had gone recruiting around Sylvarant, Before they'd become Renegades. Most of those Before times aren't happy stories.

Then again, it was hard to find a happy story nowadays.

-/-/-/-

Kratos hears the barest whisper of very familiar footsteps crunching across the snow and he looks up immediately. Yuan supposes that he shouldn't be surprised. Even if Kratos didn't show it very well, he was still concerned about Anna.

"She's fine." Yuan assures him before he can say anything. "And Doria is making sure she gets fed as we speak." If Yuan hadn't known Kratos for as long as he had, he wouldn't have seen the tension drain from him. His eyes became a little less strained and his shoulders relax ever so slightly. "How's the work coming?"

"Last I checked, they needed a little more material to slope the roof a bit more so that the snow won't pile on top of it, but they've been doing well so far."

"I really hope that the roof doesn't cave in. That would mean so much more work."  
"You're too lazy anyway."

It isn't the truth and they both know it. Yuan was a natural hard-worker. He couldn't be anything else, having grown up the way he did.

Yuan runs a critical eye over the nearly-completed base. "I'd say…give it another few weeks and she'll be fully operational and then I can get out of this accursed cold."

"A blessing for all of us."

"Hey, you like the snow."  
Kratos shrugged a little. "There is such a thing as too much of it."

"I have another theory."

"This should be interesting." Kratos muttered.

"…You _miiiss_ her."

Kratos doesn't have to ask who the 'her' is. Who else could it be but Anna? "You're being juvenile again."

"Being on the receiving end of Doria's scoldings often makes me feel that way." Yuan half-turns towards him. "But, interestingly enough, you haven't told me I'm wrong, which is usually the first thing out of your mouth when I say something like that."

"I thought I didn't have to say it anymore."  
Yuan arches an eyebrow. "Yes, of course. That's why. Nevermind the fact that you love her" Neither of them are sure whether Kratos is actually _in love_ with Anna because there was a radical difference between the two. "Ah, and I forgot to tell you, with all the excitement and all."

Kratos frowns in confusion. "What are you talking about?"  
"The morning that I went to go see Yggdrasill, Anna came storming out of her room, grumbling about the rumors that the others, especially the women, were spreading and how, apparently, it was all my fault."

"It _is_ all your fault." Kratos points out.

Yuan waved the comment away. "Details. But she did say something that I found rather interesting."  
"And that was…?"

"She said, and I quote," Knowing Yuan and his photographic memory_ (Because photos fade and wear away and lose their brilliant colors) _it would be an exact quote. "'I don't know what the hell is going on and I'd appreciate it if I got a chance to figure all this out before other people start telling me what my feelings are.'"

Yuan knows better than to expect Kratos to say anything to that. "…She didn't say no." He says, perhaps a little more gently than he intended.

"It wasn't a yes either."

"You are very determined to see the half-empty glass aren't you?"

"It's called being realistic."

"Kind of splitting hairs, aren't you?"  
"If you want to call it that."

Yuan sighed and crossed his arms. "You are being intentionally stubborn, do you know that?"

"Being unintentionally stubborn wouldn't be a very smart idea."

Yuan sighed. "Look, will you just let me get this one thing out and then you can continue being stubborn all you want?"

Kratos waited patiently.

"I'm sure you're aware of this, but you've already done all the wooing."

"_What?"_

"You can interrupt me when I'm wrong." Yuan began counting off on his fingers. "You've had dinner with her, just the two of you, plenty of times. You've kissed her and, and," He quickly shushes the protests Kratos is already beginning to make, "Seen her naked and she was sleeping in your bed. And she hasn't said no to any of this. Really, I think you skipped a vital step in all of that."

"Oh really?"

"Yes. The part about _confessing_."

"Yuan." His name alone was enough of a warning and Yuan raises his hands in mock innocence.

"I'm only telling you to stop thinking and do something about it, that's all." He wasn't in the mood to pry much deeper right now, feeling lazy and a little tired. Just one of those days, he supposed.


	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Should really be writing my English essay on my summer reading book of choice (But I read so many, it's hard to choose! I finally settled on the Lioness Quartet by Tamora Pierce.) and my Algebra 2 homework, but I wanted to get started on this.

Got a project for my art class that involves making a dummy that can stand on its own and looks realistic. Anyone got any ideas on how exactly to do that?

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/ _Love is not blind - it sees more, not less. But because it sees more, it is willing to see less. ~Julins Gordon_

-/-/

Anna had been helping out with the magitechnology that had been stuttering a little—even with all the work they put in making sure the walls kept out the heat, it still seemed like the machines were still getting overheated too often—when another one of the machines started into life.

"Hello?" Anna frowns and pokes her head out from underneath the machine. The familiar voice belonging to the equally familiar face are displayed on one of the screens. Yuan is tapping something and his brow is furrowed. "Is this thing on?"

Anna laughs and Yuan is immediately searching for the source of the noise. By now, he knows Anna's sounds well. "Anna?"

She slides the rest of the way out from beneath the machine and dusts herself off a bit. "So you finally got things working over there?"  
"I thought that would be obvious." Yuan looks her over. "Who put you to work with the machines?"

"Benesch."

"Remind me to psycho-evaluate him when I get back. Why he ever thought letting _you_ work the machines was a good idea…"

Anna glares at him and he smirks in response. "I'll have you know I'm fixing one of your thrice-damned computers."

"Did you cross the cables?"

"You're going to have to be more specific. There are a lot of cables in that thing."

Yuan sighs. "And that's why Botta's going back as soon as we figure this technology out."

Anna looks to make sure she isn't going to push any important buttons when she leans against one of the consoles. "How's that going?"

Yuan runs an ink-stained hand through his hair, evidence of the long hours poring over the designs and the details. "It's a slow process, but we're getting there. How's everything on that side?"

"As normal as could be expected. The machines are breaking down more often because of overheating, but Ravel's working on a solution to that." She hesitates before asking her next question. "Hey…is Kratos around?"

Yuan's eyes glitter strangely at the question—Anna is almost positive that it's from suppressed laughter—but he just says, "Give me a minute and I can probably find him…somewhere…Ah-hey, Noishe! Damn dog."

Anna grins as she watches Yuan nearly get bowled over by the protozoan. "Things never change."

There's a click of a door closing. "That explains where Noishe ran off to."

"Hey, Kratos." Anna greeted. He hadn't shown up on the screen, but she knew his voice.

"Anna." Kratos appears in the screen, looking slightly surprised. "So he got it working, did he?"

"Surprisingly."

"Thanks for the trust, you two." Yuan mutters just loud enough for them to hear, finally getting a good grip on the scruff of Noishe's neck. He looks up suddenly as if someone called his name. "That's Botta. Probably has another idea on that damned technology."

Kratos refrains from glaring at Yuan, who smirks just as soon as he's sure he's no longer being shown on the screen. Both seraphim knew perfectly well that Botta was back in Flanoir getting some well-deserved rest.

Kratos was going to kill his best friend.

"Why's Noishe at the base?" Anna asked. "I thought he didn't like travelling over all that snow."

"We managed to convince him that staying at the base was a better idea than staying in Flanoir."  
"Who badly did he disturb the peace this time?"

"He ate the innkeeper's wife's chickens."

Anna groaned. "Can't you tell him to not do it?"

"I've tried over the years. It never worked. Noishe has a mind of his own."

They're both silent for long moments. It's a slightly uncomfortable silence, made strange by the fact that they couldn't physically feel the other's presence in the room.

"Kratos, have you ever met an elf?"

His garnet eyes, a little dimmed and warped by the screen, blink at her. "Yes. Why?"

Anna shrugged. "Curiosity. There are half-elves everywhere, but I've never met a full-blooded elf. I actually don't think there are any in Sylvarant, but that seems silly to me. Half-elves have to come from somewhere, right? It just seemed strange to me. Are elves common in Tethe'alla?"

Kratos tilted his head a little as he regarded her. "I'm beginning to think that your questions are as bottomless as your appetite."  
Anna scowled. "Answer the question, Kratos."

He can understand why Yuan likes to yank at people's chains and get under their skin. The results were amusing.

"…I wouldn't call them _common_, really. They tend to stick to themselves. Hardly ever leave their lands. But everyone knows where to find them if they really wanted to."

"Are the elves like half-elves at all?" Were they as kind and stubborn as the people she's come to know?

"Many of them aren't. Elves are…" Kratos tried to find words that weren't so degrading. He was friends—close acquaintances really—with some of them, after all. The Storyteller, for one. And some of the shopkeepers were spitfires in the slow world of the long-lived. "Aloof and…very set in their ways." Arrogant and stubborn, in other words.

Anna clicked her tongue. "Sounds like someone I know." She says, smiling.

Kratos half-glared at her, which only makes her laugh. She's like Yuan in the way that neither of them ever seemed to really take those glares seriously. He wants to pretend that he hates that about them, but neither of them allows him his illusions.

Yuan pokes his head back into the room. His voice is all that alerts Anna to his presence. "Hey, Kratos, the last of us are heading back to Flanoir for the night. Are you coming?"

Kratos sighs. "Back out into the cold."

"I don't see why either of you complains about that. It's not like you can feel it anyway."  
Yuan appears beside Kratos. "It's the principle of the thing."

"Uh-huh." Anna says doubtfully. "Because you two have so many principles."

_(The bruises have to be real…)_

-/-/-/-

"Doria?"

The woman turned back to Anna, who was pushing her stew around her bowl, but not actually eating it. It was a tactic that Mikal had used. "Yes?"

"…How did you meet your husband?"

"…He was a wood-carver. Had his own little shop. I walked in one day to buy a birthday gift for my mother and we…clicked."

Anna takes a thoughtful sip of her stew. "…But…how did you know you clicked?"

If Doria thought that the question had anything to do with Kratos, she knew better than to mention it. "….I trusted him practically right away. I'd never met him before, but I felt that I could. He became a close friend before he confessed."  
"How long did it take him?"

"What, to confess?"

"Mm."

"I'd known him awhile by then. I can't remember an exact number or date now."

"…And you had, y'know, your problems right? You didn't always agree on everything?"  
"Of course not."

"How'd you get past that?"

"Everyone does it differently. Some people need space when they're angry or bothered by something. When my husband and I fought, he would always retreat to his shop and begin carving something. I remember one time that we fought, he made a swan for me. Swans aren't very common around Asgard, so he'd never actually seen one. It looked more like a duck, really."  
Anna had never seen Doria smile like that. "Swans settle in Luin every spring…The baker used to sell a special bread around that time of year that he sold cheap. We would buy it and feed the swans."

"One day, I want to see that. It sounds like a lovely sight."

"Once we take down Cruxis, I'll take you." Anna promised.

-/-/-/-

Anna is surprised one morning when she goes down to the hangar for the inter-dimensional transport vehicles to see Botta working at one of the consoles.

"I thought you were in Tethe'alla." She says as a greeting.

"We need the technology online on this side if we want it to work."

"You guys got the vehicles working already?" Anna hadn't had much more contact with the Tethe'alla base since about a week or two ago.

"We think they work."

"Think?"

"The only way to truly find out if they work is to test them."

"And who's going to test them?"

"Yuan was volunteered." In other words, Yuan drew the short straw.

Anna smiled a little. "I'm sure he's happy about that."

Botta gave a short chuckle. "You can imagine. Pass me that screwdriver."

Anna obliged. "And say it does work, how many operation vehicles are there?"

"So far, only two. But they can carry up to two people. Three if you really want to push it."

"Do they have names yet?"  
"Not yet, no. I believe Kratos was working on it when I left." Anna started as sparks jumped from the cables and the machine whirred to life. "Contact the base for me, please, while I add the finishing touches?"

In a few short seconds, Yuan was on the screen and craning his neck as though he could see what Botta was doing. "Are we absolutely sure this works?"

Not that he didn't trust Botta, but he'd really rather not be trapped in the inter-dimensional plane for all eternity.

"Positive, sir." Botta replied absently.

"Only fools are positive." Yuan shot back.

"I think we've long since passed the point of foolishness, sir." Botta finished bolting the last piece in place. "We're online."

Yuan tapped away at a few keys. "Alright. Ready?"

"Yessir."

"If I'm not over there in the next five minutes, something's gone wrong." Yuan turns the screen off and there's a disturbing quiet. Anna listens to Botta count the minutes out loud, though she knows that he's counting the seconds in his mind as well.

The room explodes in light the next moment and there's a screech of metal on metal. Once Botta and Anna can see again, blinking to clear away the last of the brilliantly bright light, they can see Yuan sitting astride the vehicle.

Yuan sits back, hands carefully releasing the handlebars and he laughs, pushing his hair out of his face. "Quite a ride." He says. The smile on his face and the look in the blue-green eyes makes him look years younger.

Anna holds out a hand to help him down. "Landing needs some work."

"Just a bit." Yuan agreed.

Kratos' face appeared on the screen. "It works?"

Yuan held out his arms and did a quick spin. "I'm in one piece and I'm here. I'd say it works pretty well."

Kratos doesn't show any relief that his best friend made it, but Yuan hadn't expected him to. "And the vehicle made it?"  
"In a manner of speaking."

"Yuan."

The half-elf chuckled. "We need to work on the landing, but it's still intact. Mostly."

"Botta?"

Botta knows that Kratos trusts him to keep the Renegade leader in check. "He's not lying this time."

"A day for firsts all around."

-/-/-/-

"Up early, as usual."

Anna turns to Yuan, resting on his usual boulder. One leg is bent with an arm resting on his knee. "Thought you'd be working on the vehicle."

"I needed some air and I thought I'd enjoy the morning out here while I was at it."

Anna studies him. "You're happier than usual. Why?"

Yuan studies her in the same way she had him. He debates on whether to tell her the truth. "Simply for the fact that for the first times since this rebellion started, it feels like it could really work."

Anna sits beside him. She'd come out here intending to do her forms (Kratos had a good way of ingraining habits in your head) but she thinks she can forgo them today. "The great Renegade leader is uncertain."

"Don't tell the others." Yuan flashed her a smirk. "They'll make fun of me."

Anna grinned. "You mean even more than they do now?"

"I can't help that they're jealous of my lovely features."

"Yes…that must be it." Anna says sarcastically. "How's the repairing of the vehicle going?"

"We're nearly finished. And I do believe I came up with a name."

Anna blinked. Kratos was the one who was good with words. "Really?"

"You really have no faith in me, do you?"

"Sorry if I don't consider you a poet. What's the name?"  
"Rheaird."

"I'm sorry…Did you stutter?" Anna asked, blinking.

Yuan snorted a laugh. "I can't remember the last time I stuttered." That's a lie. He can remember it clearly because it was the day that Martel had first laid eyes on the silver ring. "And it's a mixture of two words."

"What foreign language did you use?"

"Hey, only one word is in a different language. It's the name of a bird that used to live on the plains of the elven territories. I'm actually not sure if they're extinct or not. The rhea."

"Never heard of it."

"I'd be very surprised if you had." Even when he was growing up and rheas were common on the plains outside of Asgard, few people had known their proper name.

"And the other word?"

"Bird."

Anna hums in thought. "Rhea and bird. Rheaird." She rolls the word around on her tongue. "I'm not sure if it sounds right to me, but maybe it's 'cause I've never seen this bird of yours."

"I'll see if I can't find a picture or something."

"Thanks, but that doesn't change the fact that the name is downright weird."  
"When you come up with something better, please, share."  
"Gladly."

-/-/-/-

Anna groans when the knocks come at her door and burrows her head in the pillow. When the knocks persist, she knows she can rule out a certain two angels who would have simply walked right in. She'd been enjoying a well-earned afternoon nap (she _had_ been working the night and morning shift, after all).

She grumbles as she kicks off the thin sheets, it being far too hot for blankets out here, and half-stumbles to the door as she struggles back into full awareness. "Yeah?" Anna asks as she opens the door, leaning a shoulder on the frame.

It's Hassan, one of the teenagers. "I-I'm sorry. I didn't think you were asleep."  
Anna shakes her head. "It's fine. What's the visit for?"

"Kratos just came from that other place, Tethe'alla. They're bringing others from over there as well. I just thought you'd wanna be one of the first ones to know."

"Not that I'm not grateful for you telling me, but why would you think that?"

Hassan blinks at her. "You love him, don't you?"  
Anna pinched the bridge of her nose. What _was_ it that had everyone thinking that? Not that she didn't like Kratos. Oh no. He was companionable, intelligent. He made her laugh, even when she didn't want to. But whether she _loved_ him was an entirely different matter.

"Thanks, Hassan. I'll head down in a bit."

When she finally goes down to the hangar after splashing some cold water in her face to wake herself up fully. There are half a dozen of the Tethe'allan recruits standing near the Rheaird and looking very uncomfortable. Anna is glad to see that the woman who'd bothered her that morning about being in love with a monster was safely back in Tethe'alla. She has a feeling that Yuan is to thank for that.

Kratos glances up from where he was talking to the Tethe'allans, as expected, but as soon as he sees Anna, he looks sharply back at them. Anna waits until Botta is leading the Tethe'allans out of the room, most likely to show them their rooms and whatnot, to lean on a console.

"Doria's sure to be making a welcome feast for them as we speak." She began conversationally.

"I'm sure." He replies.

"Yvette's pregnant. She found out two weeks ago."

"Congratulations to her."

Anna leans back a bit more. She hadn't been sure when she'd walked in, but now she was positive. Kratos was very determinedly not looking at her. "There something wrong with my face, Kratos?"

He does an automatic glance up before looking away once more. "Of course not."

She rocks to her feet. "Then why can't you seem to look me in the eye?"

"No reason." Except for the fact that he can still see the evidence of the bruises, the bruises _he_ helped inflict on her. They're mostly mottled yellows now, with a few that were blue-tinged. Had they been normal bruises, they'd have healed by now. But because of his and Yuan's unnatural strength, it was taking at least double the time.

"You're lying to me." Anna liked to think, sometimes, that Kratos would eventually stop lying to her, but apparently that wasn't going to be the case. "Why?" Kratos starts to walk away, but Anna catches his shoulder. "Answer me."  
"I don't owe you any answers, Anna."  
She grits her teeth. He's not wrong. He doesn't owe her anything. "Then give me a reason."

His mouth works faster than his mind. "Because it hurts to look at you."

Anna's lips tighten into a thin line. Her hand drops from his shoulder. "…I see. So sorry that I'm so terrible to look at."

"That isn't what I meant." Kratos says quickly before she can leave the room.

Anna turns to him, arms crossed, her entire posture defiant and challenging. "And what did you mean?"

Kratos doesn't answer right away. He knows the answer, knows what he should be saying. But how did you put something like that into words? "The bruises." He finally settles on.

Anna is silent for a moment, processing. "The bruises?" She holds out an arm, shoving the short sleeve all the way up. The bruises are difficult to see now and most of them don't hurt anymore when she bumps them against something. "Kratos, you shouldn't feel guilty about that. It had to be done."

He should've expected her practicality to kick in. Kratos shook his head. "That's no excuse."

Anna sighed. "I'll heal, Kratos. If you and Yuan hadn't done this to me, I'd probably be a lab rat again. Or worse."

"We could have come up with a different way."

"There _was_ no other way, Kratos and you know it. That's the only reason you agreed to it. Telling yourself any different is only going to make yourself feel worse when you don't have to."  
Kratos had never thought of Anna as forgiving. Not that she was a vengeful person (not much more than anyone else was anyway) but he knew that she could hold a grudge.

"Think about it." Anna said impatiently. "You told me it was for the Renegades. If you're going to do this every time that you do something that needs to be done, then it's a problem."  
"It _isn't_ a problem." Kratos insisted.

"Then prove it." Anna challenged.

They were much closer than Anna remembered them being. Being so close meant Anna had to look up so she could see Kratos' face. He was slightly leaning towards her and there was a strange, burning look in his eyes, an expression that she didn't recognize.

Kratos quickly straightened, clearing his throat. "We should hurry, else we'll miss Doria's welcome feast."

Anna watches his back as he leaves the hangar and she can't help feeling like she's missed something.


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Figured out how the next couple of chapters are gonna go while I was just kinda laying in bed this morning 'cause I was too lazy to get up, but I couldn't go back to sleep.

Had to go to a college night for school. Anyone else scared stiff at the thought of college?

Gonna be a short chapter, but it's all going to pick up next chapter. Promise. I just thought that this would be a good place to leave this chapter at.

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/ 

_A friend accepts us as we are yet helps us to be what we should. ~Author Unknown_

-/-/

Yuan picks up that there's something wrong as soon as Kratos walks into the kitchen. There was something off in the way he was walking. He gets two full mugs of ale before making his way to his friend and pushing one of the mugs into his hand.

"So what happened?" Yuan asks quietly, watching the crowd that was passing each other plates and laughing. Some of the Tethe'allans were huddled in a corner and looking very uncomfortable while a few of the others had been swept up into the excitement.

"What makes you think something's happened?"

"Stop pretending and tell me." Yuan said impatiently. "I know you too well anyway and I'm not in the mood for mind games." Kratos refrained because at that moment he spotted Anna threading her way through the crowd to make her way to Doria. Yuan followed his gaze. "You did something stupid, didn't you?"

"In a manner of speaking."

Yuan watches as Anna sneaks nutcakes and biscuits from one of the trays into a bowl and takes a very tall glass of ale before slipping out of the crowd and towards the stairs, most likely to her room. "In Anna's manner of speaking, apparently."

Yuan clapped his friend on the shoulder. "Now, I'm going to get the story from her, since you are being so very uncommunicative. So, you sit here and have a nice wallow in your stupidity."

Kratos thinks about arguing, then decides against it. Knowing Yuan, he'd get the story from her regardless of whether or not Kratos told him. Might as well save himself the effort.

Yuan manages to catch Anna's door just as its closing before slipping inside. Anna whirls around, some of the ale spilling over the edge of the glass.

"What're you doing here?"

Yuan plucks on the baked goods from the bowl. "You took the last of the nutcakes."

Anna can't help the chuckle that escapes her lips. "I was hungry.' She says, leaning back until she's sitting in the comfortable armchair that some of the guys found when they went into Triet. The armchair had been about to be thrown away when they'd salvaged it. Anna had claimed it as soon as she saw it. The fabric was thin and well-worn. There were a few stains on the arms and it squeaked when you shifted, but it was very comfortable.  
"Apparently." Yuan took a bite of the nutcake before asking, "So what's wrong?" He could've been tactful about this, could've gone in with clever words and charm, but Anna, in all her practicality, was someone who needed a straightforward kind of handling.

Anna set the glass down carefully on the windowsill before working on tearing apart a biscuit. "Nothing."

"Mm_hm_." Yuan makes a disbelieving sound and grabs another nutcake. They had an addictive quality, like those pistachio nuts that was sold in Triet on market day. It was impossible to have just one.

"Yuan, would you say I can take care of myself? In general, I mean." Because Anna knows full well that she can't hold her own against angels and an army of Desians.

Yuan thought about that for a moment. She was certainly capable of fighting—he and Kratos had made sure of that—and, had this been an ordinary world, she could've fought off any kidnappers. "In general, yes."

"So why does Kratos insist on being protective? He knows I can take care of myself, doesn't he?"

"Yes." Yuan replied slowly. "But he worries. It's what he does."

"But this time he's worried about nothing! It's just a few bruises and they're more than half-healed already."

Yuan should have guessed that that was what was bothering Kratos. Anna had consented to the bruises, and she was right, bruises healed. And while Yuan wasn't as bothered about it as Kratos was_ (Because it was all for the Renegades and they're who he needs to think of right now. The Renegades as a whole, not simply Anna)_ he didn't love her like Kratos did.

"He doesn't like violence." He sees the question on her face. Kratos, one of the greatest warriors of the ages, didn't like violence? "He never has. And just because he's good at it doesn't mean he likes it. It's useful."

And it had been a necessary skill when they were growing up. Yuan doubts that Anna would recognize the child he'd known when they were growing up. She wouldn't even recognize him as a teenager, most likely, too awkward and small for his limbs.

"You'd think such a practical guy wouldn't just go protective all of a sudden." Anna yawned and Yuan remembered seeing the shift schedule. Since their forces had been split between Tethe'alla and Sylvarant and many of the Sylvaranti had been helping build the new base, people here had been pulling double shifts. And Anna got little sleep as it was. "I mean, why do that?"

"…Perhaps because he loves you." Yuan suggested.

But Anna was already asleep. Yuan sighed and took the bowl from her lap, setting it on the windowsill as well before taking one of the thin spare blankets from the bed and laying it over her.

-/-/-/-

"You did do something stupid."

Kratos didn't look up. "I'm so glad you confirmed it."  
"I just thought you needed the friendly reminder." Yuan said. "And I have some news for you."

"You seem to be having a lot of news for me recently."

"You're going to like this particular piece of news, my dear idiotic friend." Yuan leaned his shoulder on the wall and paused for a moment to think about how he would phrase this. "But first, I must ask that you don't interrupt until I'm completely done."  
Kratos did look up this time. "Alright." He agreed warily. What had Yuan done now?

"Now, when I was getting the story from Anna, I may or may not have mentioned the certain little fact of your feelings for her." Yuan expects the glare that Kratos is shooting at him, but true to his word, Kratos doesn't interrupt. "And she didn't immediately snap at me and tell me I was wrong, like she's been known to do."

Technically, Anna wasn't part of the waking world at that moment in time, but Kratos doesn't need to know that.

"You did what?"  
Yuan can't suppress a chuckle because the answer is so absolutely Kratos. "I think you're concentrating on the wrong part of the news."

Kratos ignores him, even though he agrees. "You had no right to tell her."

"I had every right considering you are being a stubborn ass about this. Either you do something, or I set you two up so you have no choice. And you know that I've no problem with locking both of you in a supply closet for a few hours."

Kratos had once been on the receiving end of a similar threat from Yuan and had no wish to be so again. "You're very determined on this subject, aren't you?"

"Absolutely." And it's because of more than simply friendship. Yuan _owes_ Kratos. It isn't an unusual thing. They owe each other all the time. Money or favors, usual friend things. But it isn't like _owing_ and Kratos has told him time and again that Yuan doesn't _owe_ him anything, but Yuan disagrees every time.

Had it not been for Kratos, Yuan doubts that he'd ever have known to read, or write. He'd never have been a free man. Would never have met Mithos_ (Which, even now, he can't find himself regretting)_ or Martel. Would never have become the man he is now.

Kratos has told him before that, even taking all of that into account, Yuan _owes_ him nothing. That Yuan had created the man Kratos was just as much as the reverse was true. When they'd meet, Kratos hadn't had his courage, hadn't had his strength. Neither of them would be who they are without the other. It's the way they've always been.

-/-/-/-

Kratos prepares himself for…something…the next morning when he goes to wake Anna for their training which by now has become routine. If Yuan truly _had_ told her, she wouldn't be able to keep quiet about it.

But Anna doesn't challenge him, doesn't do anything well within the realm of her fiery temper. She's sitting on her bed and pulling on her boots when she looks up. Her gaze is a little cool, which he can chalk up to their last conversation (argument, more like it).

"Good morning." He begins cautiously.

"Morning." Anna replies as she gets to her feet, tapping the toe of her boot on the floor to make it fit better.

Kratos notices the bowl of the hardened nutcakes and biscuits, the still full glass of ale. "So that's where the nutcakes went. Doria was wondering."

Anna shrugged a little, slightly embarrassed. "I got hungry and didn't really feel like mingling, so…"

"And you saved yourself from hearing quite a few drunken songs. Badly sung, by the way."  
The coolness in her eyes is suddenly gone as she laughs. "I can imagine that. Any songs I might know?"

"There was one about a hanged man's tree and a few other rather lewd ones. Some of them even tried to get Botta to sing."

"Oh dear…and did he?"

"If he did, I did not hear him. I suspect we'll hear more about it in the kitchen, in any case. Doria is sure to be making some hangover remedy."

"Now that I think about it, can you and Yuan even get drunk anymore?"

"It takes quite a bit of alcohol to do it, but yes."

Anna arches an eyebrow as they descend the stairs. "Do I want to know how you know that?"

"Yuan had many experiments with our angelic limits." It had probably begun as something to get his mind off of Martel, off of Mithos' descent into madness, of that Kratos is almost sure of. But he is just as sure that Yuan had continued them because of his own curiosity, something that Kratos thinks is nearly as insatiable as Anna's.

"Let me guess, you had to deal with the consequences?"

"As always."

Once they're outside, the dawn nothing more than a pink line on the horizon, they don't speak. At first, Anna goes through her forms. Kratos watches her and sometimes he'll stop her and reposition her arms.

"When you punch," Kratos says, "You have to put your whole body into it. Punch just like you were doing it."

Anna does.

"Do it again, except this time, twist your hips and your shoulders into it."

Again, Anna does.

"Do you feel the difference?"

She nods.

"Now practice that."

He doesn't have to tell her to practice until it hurts.

Slowly, the other trainees trickle downstairs and Kratos goes to help them. As Anna continues to practice her punches, she watches the others (But focuses on Kratos). He's as patient a teacher as he'd ever been, still as unrelenting, but something about him seemed more distracted today. Perhaps it was just her imagination.

The sun is already climbing its way through the sky when they finish and Anna wipes her sweat away with a towel. She sees one of the Tethe'allans standing just off to the side.

"Something wrong?" Anna asks him. His hair is dirty blonde and cut short. His intelligent gray eyes had been watching everyone train for a little less than half the time that they'd been out there.

"Only the wealthy and the soldiers are taught to fight in Tethe'alla." The man said.

"It doesn't matter what you are here. Rich, poor, human, half-elf, we don't care."

"It sounds very strange."

Anna smiled. "Yeah, I suppose it does. I'm Anna, by the way."

"Alijah." He looks her over. "You are of Sylvarant?"

"How could you tell?"

"Your accent. And Sylvaranti women seem much…stronger…than Tethe'allan women. Sturdier, I suppose."  
Anna can only shrug in response. "I think it's because we have to be."

"I believe so too. Is it common here for women to fight?"

"Not really, but they can." Anna says as they begin walking back into the cool shade of the base.

"So why do all these women come in the morning to train? Do they expect to see the front lines of a battle?"

"For the most part, I don't think it was a conscious decision. I know that I hated not being able to defend myself, to have to depend on others to do all my fighting. I just got sick of it." Of it and of nightmares keeping her awake at night.

"Kratos teaches you well?" Alijah asks.

"He's a great teacher. He's serious about women being able to put up a fight."

"That much, I could see for myself." He paused for a moment. "This may seem like an…impertinent question, but…are you and Kratos lovers?"

Anna tries to keep her temper down. He was from Tethe'alla and she hadn't known him as long as she'd known those from the Sylvarant base. "No, we're not. We're just friends."

Alijah's smile is slightly shy, but there is an edge of confidence to it. "For that, I'm glad. I think it would be hard to compete with a man like him." Anna blinks, not quite sure what to say about that. His smile widens just a bit before he turns to leave. "It was nice meeting you, Anna."

"So he found you, did he?"

Anna turns to Doria, who's slipping something in the oven. "What are you talking about?"

"He's been asking about you since he got here. Very curious about you. I think he's a 'gentleman caller' as my mother used to say."  
Anna arched her eyebrows. If her mother had ever said anything about gentlemen callers, she can't remember it at all. But she does remember a few things of that sort being said about her and Nolan when they were about fourteen. "He's nice enough, I guess."

"No interest in him?"  
"Not really."

"No interest in who now?" Yuan asked, plucking a plum from the bowl of fruit that sat on the counter.

"Has anyone ever told you that you're as nosy as an old woman?" Anna said.

"Multiple times. Usually by Kratos. Who don't you have any interest in?"

"Alijah, from Tethe'alla."

A strange look came into Yuan's eyes. "_Really?_"

Anna eyes him warily. "What's 'really' mean?"

Yuan smirked. "Nothing to worry your pretty little head over."

Anna's eyes narrowed at him. "And _that's _what makes me nervous."

-/-/-/-

"What's he doing?" Kratos asks Botta as he comes into the room.

"Performing an extensive background check on someone." Botta replied from his console.

"Alijah Hayman." Kratos read over Yuan's shoulder. "Who is he?"

"I do believe Doria called him Anna's 'gentleman caller'." Yuan said, scrolling down the page.

"Were you listening at keyholes again?"

"Only because I was eavesdropping."

"And Anna called me protective." Kratos mutters. He isn't surprised that Yuan hears him anyway.

"I don't recall you running any background checks on Kratos." Botta comments as he holds out a stack of papers. "The latest movements on Kvar."

Yuan takes the papers, setting them down in front of him before returning his attention to Alijah's profile. "Two reasons. One, I know Kratos too well to need to run a background check on him. And two, I trust Kratos. I don't trust this guy. He's got shifty eyes."

Botta chuckled. "Shifty eyes?"

"Yeah. Shifty. Look at him."

"Sir, it's a still photo. Eyes can't be shifty in a still photo."

"Of course they can!"

Kratos patted Yuan's hand away from the mouse and scrolled down. "Anything incriminating?"  
"In our eyes or the eyes of the law?"

"Either. Both."

"He's been a half-elven right activist in Meltokio for two years. A native of Ozette—"

"Where he would naturally be ostracized by the humans there."

"Yes, except that his mother got a job working as a maid for the Lezareno Company in Altamira for their new hotel, so they moved when he was fourteen. He began helping out when he was seventeen doing the heavy lifting and helping out with the construction as they were building their resort."

"And his father?"

"Native of Heimdall. Lived with the wife in Ozette for a few years with their son until he decided to move back. Hasn't had any contact with them since."

"Meaning he's bitter." Kratos guessed.

"Almost definitely."

"What else?"  
"Twenty-two years old, blonde hair, gray eyes, six foot one and, at last check, weighted 187 pounds." Yuan recited.

Kratos studied Alijah's picture more closely. He'd seen the man while working on the base in Tethe'alla, naturally, but he hadn't had much contact with him. Yuan was the one that really interacted with people. "You're right." Kratos said firmly. "I don't trust him."

Yuan grinned and held out a hand to Botta. "Pay up. He's on my side."


	20. Chapter 20

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **I saw Easy A on Monday. That movie was hysterical. I loved it. Also got some fantastical sushi. :)

Got a Psychology class now. So far, it's awesome. Spanish class makes me feel like an idiot since I'm sitting there with my English to Spanish dictionary and I have to translate the whole page of work before I can do any of it and actually understand what I'm doing.

There's a reference to The Musketeer in here. If anyone can find it, kudos to them.

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/

_A bell is no bell 'til you ring it,  
A song is no song 'til you sing it,  
And love in your heart  
Wasn't put there to stay -  
Love isn't love  
'Til you give it away.  
~Oscar Hammerstein, __**Sound of Music**__**, "You Are Sixteen (Reprise)"  
**__**(Thanks, Krystel)**_

-/-/

__"Would you mind terribly if I ate here?"

Anna looks sideways at the newcomer, smiling when she recognizes him. "Not terribly."

Alijah chuckles and sets his plate down beside hers and hooking a stool to sit on. Doria had had a moderate amount of success with getting people to eat in the dining room, but she'd had no luck with Anna. 'As stubborn as Yuan and Kratos' was what Doria had muttered a few days ago.

Anna takes a bite of her sandwich—Doria had offered to make a 'proper' lunch as she called it, but Anna still preferred simple meals—before asking, "How's Sylvarant treating you?"

"It feels a little strange, but I haven't seen much more of it than this base and photographs on the computers."

Anna stares at him. "And you've been here for two weeks already?"

"To my understanding, the Renegades are slightly understaffed."

"Understaffed isn't quite right. Things at the Tethe'alla base are still getting squared away, so everyone's getting stretched. When's your next day off?"

"You mean my first one?" Alijah dug through his pocket, pulling out a crumpled piece of paper. Seeing Anna's raised eyebrow, he smiled sheepishly. "I still have problems remembering my schedule for the week."

"Y'know, you're the first person I've seen do that. Everyone has that problem, of course, but we always ran up and down trying to find where we were supposed to be."

Alijah laughed. "That sounds like it's more trouble than it's worth."

"It is." She said darkly, taking a sip of her spiced tea.

Alijah squinted at the paper. "I really need some glasses." He commented. "My day off is…Saturday."

"It's decided then."

"What's decided?"

"This Saturday, I'm gonna show you around Triet."

"Are you sure? You don't have to."

"Well, I can't just let you wander around Triet all by your lonesome. Besides, it sounds like fun." Anna wiped the crumbs from her hands, gulped down the last of her tea. "I'll meet you downstairs after training on Saturday. I think I'm late in reporting to the medical ward."

Alijah frowned. The medical ward? Anna looked the picture of health. But all he said was, "Alright. Good luck."

-/-/-/

"And here I was thinking I was going to have to track you down." Yuan commented when she came in. He was leaning on a counter, a large packet of notes in front of him.

Anna shrugged. "You told me to eat before I came."

"Eat, not have a twelve-course meal." Yuan smirked. "Though of course, I'd forgotten that for you, it's the same thing."

Anna glared playfully as she hopped up on the counter. "I had a sandwich."

"It takes you five seconds to eat a sandwich. What was the holdup? Arm, please." Yuan pulls out a syringe from one of the drawers.

Anna obediently held out her left arm, doing anything she could to not focus on the fact that she hated needles. "You're awful impatient today. Someone steal your morning nutcake?"

"Noishe, but that's besides the point. What took you so long?"

"I was talking with Alijah, if you really must know."  
Yuan's hand stilled, the needlepoint hovering centimeters above her arm. "Alijah." He repeated, sliding the needle into her arm.

"One of the Tethe'allan recruits."

Yuan pretended to think. "Ah, yes. I remember him. Nice guy."

Anna hummed in agreement. "Gonna show him around Triet on Saturday."

It took all of Yuan's admittedly great self-control not to jar the needle with a reaction. "…Really?"

"It's his first day off since he got here. I figure why not?" Anna studied him as he slipped the syringe out. "There's something wrong."  
"No, no. I am sorry, you know. About everyone working such long hours. Stand up for me, won't you?" Anna obliged, but eyed him warily. "And don't even think about running."  
Anna was instantly suspicious. Why would she need to run? She knew she wasn't faster than Yuan, so it'd be foolish to try. She reminded herself that she trusted Yuan, that he hadn't done her any lasting harm before and never without reason.

Yuan held up a strange machine. "Relax, this isn't going to hurt."

"Then why'd you tell me not to run?"

"Because you thought it was going to hurt. Hold still."

Anna does, but it's an effort not to squirm. The device in Yuan's hands is about the size of her hands put together with a thin screen and a few buttons on one side. Once Yuan turns away, eyes scanning the screen, Anna asks, "What is that?"

"X-ray."

"A what?"

"X-ray. It sees inside you." Yuan tilts the screen so Anna can see.

Anna frowns. She can't remember very much of school before she was taken to the ranch, but… "Is that supposed to be there?" She asked, pointing to a dark mass a little lower than her collarbone.

"No, it's not. Yggdrasill found it with the tests he ran. I wanted to double-check."

"What is it?"

"A Cruxis Crystal."

"_What?_"

"That was the entire purpose of the Angelus Project; to create two Cruxis Crystals in one person."  
"So, the one that's attached to me and there's one growing inside me?"

"Seems that way?"

"Any way to get it out?"

"I'd advise against it." Yuan spread out his pages of notes. "From what we've been able to piece together from your medical records, the reason that you haven't begun the angel transformation is because the Crystals are feeding off of each other, therefore not taking any energy from you."

"So…they're not growing."

"No. Whatever drugs Kvar used on you made it easy for the Crystals to feed off you. We still haven't figured out what those drugs might be to see of we can't make a kind of counter-drug since Kvar kept no files on specifically what he did to you."  
"But they're not hurting me anymore."  
"That, I've not idea about. Kvar's experiments seem to have slowed the process to where it'll take decades under ranch conditions to get through the angel transformation. He might have stopped it altogether or he they just feed so little on your energy now that it's hard to tell. You've got lots of tests ahead of you."

"The Key Crest thing won't even work now, will it? I mean, I've got two Crystals. There's no way to put a Key Crest on something that's inside of me."

"From my understanding of the way Key Crests work, they don't need to be actually attached to the Exsphere. I'll start searching for a more concrete answer."

"You should get some rest. You need it." Anna said, seeing the tiredness even through the efficiency of Yuan's movements. "Just because you don't need to sleep doesn't mean that you can keep going when you're tired."

"You sound like Kratos." Yuan muttered.

"You should listen to him."

"Funny, he's of the same opinion." Anna laughs a little and Yuan thinks that she's taking the news that she's growing a Cruxis Crystal inside her body a little too well. He thinks about asking her about it, but he knows that she'll deny any accusations of her not being okay.

Anna pokes the tender skin of the inside of her elbow. "What, no bandage?"

"I think you'll live without it."

-/-/-/-

Kratos narrowed his eyes when he saw the look on Yuan's face. "What did you do?" He asked, flipping open the files that Yuan handed to him.

"I? Nothing. Anna, however…"

"What did she do?"

"She and Alijah have a date planned."

Kratos' head jerked up from where he'd been reading. "A date?"

Yuan hides a grin. "Indeed."

"That wasn't the way I heard it." Botta said as he came in the room. "She's showing him around Triet since it's his first time there. A friendly thing."

"I still don't trust him." Kratos said.

"Naturally." Yuan said dryly. "He's Tethe'allan."

Despite having grown up in the country of Tethe'alla, Kratos had always had more of a Sylvaranti air to him. Or, Yuan had always thought so. He'd never acted like the other humans that lived in Tethe'alla.

"Did either of them, by chance, mention what time this 'not-date' was?" Kratos asked.

"If they did, I heard nothing of it." Botta said. "And Saturday's market day. Triet is going to be packed."

"Mmm…market day." Yuan glanced at Botta and Kratos, who were giving him arched eyebrows. "They have free samples of those pistachio nuts on market day. I love those."

"Sir, sometimes your immaturity frightens me."

"You'll become accustomed to it." Kratos tells him. "What's this about a Key Crest?"

Yuan knew he was speaking of the note Yuan had scribbled to himself at the bottom of the page. "I need to do some research into Key Crests, see if they can do anything for Anna even if they can't attach it to her with a Crystal growing inside of her."

"You'd have to track down that dwarf once more. Dirk, was his name?"

"That's one possibility. I'm also going to look into Cruxis' files on the dwarven works, see if they've got anything."

"And how did Anna take the news?"

"You know her. Smiled right through it. I figure I'll keep an eye on her, make sure she doesn't do anything crazy."

"I doubt she'd do anything quite that bad. It's Anna we're talking about."

"Which is precisely why she's unpredictable. You should talk to her. She listens to you."

"I doubt she'll much appreciate what she'd perceive as my prying into her business."

Yuan hummed in disagreement. "Somehow, I don't think she'll mind if it's you that's doing the prying."

"Is this your theory coming back into play?"

"Hey, it is a perfectly logical theory backed by evidence. _You_ simply refuse to accept the possibility that Anna might actually be interested in you like that. Therefore, this is all your fault."

"If that makes you feel better." Kratos eyed him. "Have you been resting?"

"That's the second time I've been told that today."

"That's a no then."

"You should rest." Botta tells him.

"Three times." Yuan clicked his tongue. "It must be true."

"If it's true, then listen to us. Take a break from the research, steal some lunch from Doria, sit out in the sun for a little bit and rest."

"Take a bubble bath, sir, if it would help."

Yuan arches an eyebrow. "A bubble bath?"

Botta shrugged. "Just a suggestion."

-/-/-/-

Kratos finds her scrubbing at the shower floors. "Don't look so cheerful." He says as he leans a shoulder against one of the stalls.

Anna looked up at him, huffed, and went back to her scrubbing. "So sorry that all my energy is being directed at getting this floor clean. When I can spare some energy, I'll be sure to grin real big, just for you."

The Renegades worked on a rotation, so everyone did everyone else's job at least once. "It could be worse. You could be cleaning the latrines with a toothbrush."

Anna chuckled a little breathlessly. Kratos frowned at the sound, but couldn't find anything outwardly wrong with her. "How many times did you have to do that?"

"Never. Yuan did, more than once. The higher officers didn't like his 'sauce' as they put it."

"He never can keep his mouth shut, can he?"

"Not when he has a sarcastic comment he can't." Kratos paused before saying, "I heard about what Yuan showed you."

"The Crystal?" Kratos nodded. "Great news for a day, right?"

"There might be a way to get it out of you or stop the process. Yuan and I were going to look into it—"

"Please tell me you got him to stop and breathe for three seconds. Yuan overworks himself."

"It took both me and Botta to do it, as well as the suggestion of a bubble bath, but he did."  
Anna's brow creased in confusion. "A bubble bath? Do I want to know?"

"It would be a strange conversation to repeat."

"Doesn't surprise me."

"Anna…you are alright, aren't you? About the Crystal?"  
"I'm fine."

"You don't sound fine."

"We're not all angelic superbeings, Kratos."

"Which is why I'm asking."

Anna sat back on her heels, pushing her bangs out of her face. "It's a lot to process, but I don't feel no different and I feel like I should."

"So you set yourself to scrubbing showers?" Even if she hadn't been looking at him, she would've heard the raised eyebrows in his tone.

Anna smiled. He's able to make her do that too easily, she thinks sometimes. "I'm looking for distraction, not something bordering on torture. It was my turn."

Kratos thinks about mentioning the trip to Triet with Alijah. If Yuan hadn't mentioned the conversation he'd overheard that Anna had had with Doria, Kratos wouldn't have had a problem with it. But he doesn't trust Alijah of the shifty eyes.

Instead, he decides to skirt the topic. "When's your next day off?"

"Saturday, thankfully. I could use a break." Anna stood, her knees cracking as she did. She'd been kneeling on tile too long. "And you? When are you going to take a break?"

Kratos thought about it, then shrugged a little. "Not quite sure. When I'm tired, I suppose."

"Doesn't sound like too good a system to me. Why don't you come with everyone to Triet on Saturday? It's market day. Triet always has the most interesting things on market day." She paused for a minute before adding, "And you know Yuan's gonna go. He can't help himself around those pistachios."

Kratos chuckled. "Can't let him run around unsupervised, is that it?"

"He's like a kid on market days."

"I'll think about it."

-/-/-/-

"I've never seen you in a dress." Was the first thing Alijah said when he went downstairs to meet Anna.

Anna plucked at the fabric of the skirt. "Dresses are, by definition, pretty impractical, but since today's the day when the rest of my laundry gets done, this is all I've got left."

"You look great." Alijah said finally after giving Anna a long look up and down. The dress was plain green cotton, the torso darker than the arms and skirt. She wore her boots, sandy and scuffed as they were and there was a satchel across her chest. Her normally unruly hair was pulled back into a ponytail. Without all the hair to distract the eye, the scar along her left cheek seemed more prominent.

Noishe barked, tugging at the hem of her skirt. Anna smiles and scratches at his head. "Yes, of course you're coming."

Alijah seemed startled by Noishe. "What is he?"

Anna's hand didn't stop scratching. "He's a dog."

"Strangest dog I've ever seen."  
Anna grinned. "That's what I said."

They walk to Triet with a few others. On days off, not many people liked to get up at their usual time. A man just outside of Triet was brushing his horse and called a greeting to them.

"You know him?" Alijah asked.

"Yeah. He's the guy who supplies horses whenever we need them."  
"But we have the Rheairds."

"As useful and convenient as they are, the Rheairds are kind of obvious. And the horses were mostly for the ranch escapees."

"Were?"

"Until everything gets stabilized with the Tethe'alla ranch and with Cruxis' eye on us, we decided not to make too much of a ruckus with the ranches."

Alijah opened his mouth to comment, but it was at that moment that they turned onto the main street and his senses were assaulted. He could smell roasting meat and exotic spices; the colors here in Sylvarant weren't as bright as Tethe'alla, but it seemed as though there were more of them and they all seemed to combine here in this market. The whites of turbans, the browns of the dirt, the reds of women's skirts and the bold patterns on the men's tunics.

There were musicians playing strange instruments and women dancing to the powerful beats. Bangles dangled from their skirts, catching the light and jingling every time they moved their hips. He was jostled in the crowd as they bumped into him.

Jewelry and wind chimes hung from stalls, glinting in the sunlight. Men and women alike admired the sleek weapons and the armor gleamed. The tanners had laid out their wares and bottles of lotions and bars of soaps were stacked together in another stall.

"This is…incredible." Alijah said, staring around at all he saw. "The closest thing to this is the students selling some of their work in Sybak, but it doesn't even compare."

Anna laughed. "Consider this your official welcome to Sylvarant."

They wove their way through the stalls, admiring shawls and the elegant, curved blades that the people of Triet seemed to favor. They lapped at shaved ice, trying to finish it before it melted. When they encountered other Renegades, they'd laugh and talk with them awhile. It was strange, Alijah mused, just how well misfits fit when they were brought together.

It's nearing sunset when Anna suggested they get a bite to eat at the inn before going back to the base. She assured him that Noishe could find his way back to the base and Noishe barked his agreement.

They'd just about finished some lentil soup dipped in bread, with a steak split between them when Kratos came to their table.

"May I join you?" He asked.

Anna looked at him, bewildered. He'd said he'd think about coming, but this wasn't very like him at all. She can hear Noishe whine, laying his head down between his paws and she glances towards the door. Yuan is leaning against the wall. Catching her eye, he shrugs, a grim smile on his lips. So he didn't entirely know what was going on either. "Yeah, of course."

Kratos crossed his legs. "We haven't had a chance to talk, have we, Mr. Hayman? I understand you're from Tethe'alla."

Alijah nodded.

"Did you study there?"

"Lord Bryant was kind enough to pay for my education at the local college."  
"I see. And what was your course of study?"  
"Politics, mostly. And humanities. I graduated two years ago, which is when I began speaking out against the King's politics."

"Most admirable. This may be a…forward question…" Anna groaned mentally. This couldn't be good. "But does your mother still follow the ways of the elves in arranging marriages?"

Anna glanced sharply at Kratos. That was more than just forward, it was an incredibly personal thing to ask someone you'd just met.

"No, not at all."

"I see. But, naturally, you've been involved with girls, haven't you? Other students at the college, perhaps?"

"I was…involved…with someone before I came here."

"And is she aware of what it is that you do?"  
"We were going through a, ah, rough patch not long before I left for Flanoir."

"So do you drop every woman you're with at the first sign of trouble?"  
Anna kicked Kratos under the table. Even if it wouldn't hurt him, it would get the message across.

"No honest man deceives a woman in that manner." Alijah said, stiffening.

"Well said. Anna, stop kicking me, please. You understand that she's very important to us." Kratos' voice was deceptively calm; his eyes were hard. "All of us would take it rather…badly…if we thought for a moment that she was being toyed with."

"Kratos," Anna began, trying to keep the anger out of her voice. "May I speak to you privately for a moment?"

"Of course."

They're outside behind the kitchens when Anna whirls on him. "What in the seven _hells_ was that?"

"He needed to be warned." Kratos said stiffly.

"I can take care of myself, thank you very much. And how'd you even find us anyway? Triet's pretty damn big and Noishe was with me." Kratos opened his mouth, but Anna cut across him. "And don't even say that you just popped inside. You have no reason to be in the inn. You don't need to eat and you don't need to sleep."

She heard the curtain be swept aside and she glared at Yuan. Dimly, she thought that she was getting to know him too well if she'd known that it would be him coming after them. Yuan put his hands up in innocence. "Hey, I didn't say a word about you coming to Triet. I just came out here to tell you that I put up a sound barrier around this little area, so feel free to shout."  
Kratos glared at Yuan's back. Four thousand plus years of friendship and Yuan couldn't lie this one time for him? Granted, it wouldn't be the first time, but it would've been greatly appreciated.

Anna turned back to Kratos. "Well? How'd you do it?"

"I used to be part of the military, Anna. We were taught to track."

She shook her head. "Nice try. I've been taught to track too and the winds wipe away tracks in the sand."

"I used a spell."

"Sure. That's possible, but I've been around mages for nearly a year now. You really think that I don't know what it takes to use a tracking spell?"

Kratos looked away, staring outwards at the wash of indigos and blues with just the slightest touches of reds and violets of the sunset. "…I had a focus."

"I don't know what that is." Just because she'd spent so much time around mages didn't mean that she knew exactly how all their spells worked. She didn't study with them, just listened absently as she worked on her things.

"It's…something of yours to connect with."  
"May I see it?"

For a moment, she thought he might refuse. Then his hands went to the back of his neck, working at the clasp of a necklace she'd never seen before. It was a simple steel chain, a locket hanging off of it.

She opened the locket and inside one half was a miniature photo of her. And in the other half was one of her dark brown curls. It didn't seem like something magical item used to find someone. It seemed more like a lover's token. She gave it back to him.

There was one question she wanted answered though. "Where'd you get the hair?" Anna knew that he could have gotten the photo from any of the files the Renegades had on her. That part wasn't difficult.

"After one of the times when we cut your hair in Luin."

"You've had it that long?"

"It was a precautionary measure. In case you got yourself snatched by the Desians again."  
"Not that I don't appreciate the thought, Kratos, but I _am_ capable of taking care of myself, regardless of whether it's Desians or Alijah. You saw to that personally." She sighed. "C'mon. Let's get home before it's full dark."

-/-/-/-

"Well, that was unexpected." Kratos ignores Yuan and begins changing for bed. "I've seen you do some pretty crazy stuff over the years, but that…that was something beyond anything you've ever done." Including teaching a half-elven child to read and write, including taking on his own father in the war.

"I'm so glad you got some amusement out of it."

"I wasn't being sarcastic, Kratos." Yuan leans his forearms on his thighs, hands clasped. "Hell, I'm proud of you."

"For making a fool of myself?"  
"No, for finally doing something that needed to be done. You've been skirting the topic of your feelings for Anna since this whole thing started. And now you did something, regardless of how it turned out."

"She knows about the locket." Kratos said as he shook sand from his hair. He'd need to give it a good wash tomorrow morning—it seemed like he had sand on his person all the time since he began living in this base.

Yuan had only seen the locket by accident, when Kratos was finding the picture for it. "How'd she take it?"  
"Considering her anger not twenty seconds before, she took it very well."  
"She doesn't know the real reason behind the locket, does she?"  
Kratos glared warningly at him. "And she won't."  
"On my honor, Anna won't hear it from me. But she _should_ hear it from you."

"Yuan."

"Yes, yes. I know. But I thought you'd like to know Mr. Hayman's reaction to your…advice, earlier."  
"I didn't hear him run out screaming." Kratos said as he washed his face in the bathroom.

"No he didn't. Shame. I would've loved to see that. In any case, he sat there absolutely frozen. I kid you not, Kratos, I don't think this kid was breathing. He was pale as death."

"Did you hear if he plans to listen to me or continue on with…whatever he was going to do?" Kratos asked, drying his face with a towel.

"I heard something about you having made your point very clear. And I believe Anna spoke with him afterwards, but I didn't catch it."

"Must have been quite the interesting conversation."

"Oh, with Anna's temper, absolutely."

"Did she look angry with him?"

"She didn't look like she was going to castrate him on the spot, if that's what you mean. I'd go more for annoyed." Yuan studied Kratos. "And I do believe that news just made your day."  
"Why would it?"

"Because you're not the only man she's angry with."

"She didn't look very pleased with you either."

"True, but that's nothing new." Yuan rocked to his feet. "Can't wait to see how the rest of this plays out. 'Night, Kratos."


	21. Chapter 21

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Just got the news that my cousin, a Marine stationed in Afghanistan, was killed.

**RIP Anthony Rosa**

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/  
_  
A loyal friend laughs at your jokes when they're not so good, and sympathizes with your problems when they're not so bad. ~Arnold H. Glasgow_

-/-/

"Where're you headed?" Anna asked, watching Kratos buckle on his sword. He didn't wear it inside the base, though the daggers and knives never left his belt and boots.

"Recruiting in Asgard."

She straightens from where she'd been packing some supplies in boxes for the Tethe'alla base—it was snowstorming something fierce over there and they couldn't get to Flanoir for supplies—and asks, "Can I go?"

"It'll be rather repetitive." Kratos warns her.

"Maybe, but I've never been to Asgard. I've heard it's real pretty."

"There's no transportation for you. The Rheairds are too obvious, especially with the Desians still searching for you and on horseback, it would take nearly a day."  
Anna's hands went to her hips, though her expression was more of exasperation than of anger. "You've got wings, don't ya? And we both know that you can carry little ol' me."

Kratos shouldn't be surprised that Anna was able to find the one way he would've preferred not to travel. Not because he minded carrying her; he'd carried far heavier and Anna didn't squirm much, though she had invented some rather creative insults and curses the last time he'd flown with her.

No, it was because it would be the closest he'd been to her since she'd found out about the locket.

But that doesn't mean that he doesn't think it wouldn't be nice to spend a day with her, like they had when they'd lived together.

He sighs. "Get a coat. It's still a little cold in that area."

-/-/-/-

She catches him looking at the large canyon that takes up almost the entire center of Asgard. Anna lowers her voice to that volume where she knows he's the only one who can hear her. "You know what used to be there, don't you?"

"I never saw it myself, but yes."

It's another one of those moments when Anna isn't entirely sure how to respond. She takes in what she can see of Asgard. They'd gone past the shops on the left cliff—how did they build that, she wonders. The buildings are inside the cliff-face itself—and they're turning a long bend now around the canyon. The roads are all dirt here, though occasionally there'll be a few cobblestones and Anna feels the urge to sweep aside all the dirt and see the ruins of this city the way they were supposed to be. She thinks that there used to be a town square where the canyon used to be. Perhaps a small fountain or a well, like in Luin, where the children would play as grandmothers watched over them.

Anna thinks about asking for confirmation of whether her imaginings are right, but decides against it. Instead, she asks, "What happened?"

"Do you remember us telling you about the magitechnology weapon that the humans created to fight the half-elves?"

"The Mana Cannon, right?"

Kratos nodded. "Here's the destruction it could cause."

Anna suddenly felt very hollow, her imaginings going dark. Had there been children playing by the well when the Mana Cannon had destroyed them? Had there been grandmothers trying to hobble away as the stones were blasted away from beneath their feet?

She leaned closer, peering down into the canyon. It's at an angle, she can tell that much. And it gets shallower the further away she gets from where she's standing. Anna wonders if anyone's ever tried climbing down there.

Kratos' hand gently but firmly grasping her wrist jolts her back to reality and she realizes she'd been leaning just a bit too far. But he doesn't reprimand her like she can vaguely remember villagers in Luin doing when she did the same thing, leaning too close to the lake water during winter.

Anna swallows down the darker thoughts of the past_ (And now wonder Yuan and Kratos are the way they are, with their occasionally morbid humor and the natural defensiveness. How else would they have survived in an age when this sort of thing was common?)_ and asks, "So where are these half-elves?"  
Kratos nods and she follows his eyes. More rock formations in the cliffs, more houses built into the rock, but here, the doors are of obviously poorer quality, the clothes a little more tattered. Children are calling out to each other and it doesn't take long for Anna to realize that they're playing chase me-find me. There are people working on rooftops and repairing windmills.

"Do they use wind for energy as well?"

"The Sylph's temple is not far from here. Their influence is strong in these parts."

"A simple 'yes' would've sufficed. So, how are we going to go about this?"

"Start asking around. They won't rat us out, regardless of their answer."

"You sound very confident about that." Anna muttered. "We're both obviously human. What if they won't talk to us?"  
Kratos smiled, a little lopsidedly. "You'll think of something. You're very good at getting people to listen."

-/-/-/-

By the end of the day, they're tired with only a few 'maybe's to show for it. One of the women was kind enough to give them some stew, though they'd both felt guilty for accepting it after seeing her three scrawny children hovering by the doorway.

Anna sat on one of the stone steps, brushing her bangs out of her face. The constant breeze was wonderful, though she was grateful for Kratos' suggestion for the coat. It was early spring once again _(How strange it feels to know that she's known Kratos for this long, that she's been free for an entire year)_ and the trees were budding with new leaves.

"How do you like Asgard?" Kratos asks from a step beneath her.

"It's a strange town. It feels so old, but at the same time, it's always moving. But I like the…atmosphere, I guess is the word I'm looking for." Asgard isn't anything like she's used to. There is no open contempt for half-elves, but there's an undercurrent of discontent. It's so unlike the Renegades and even Luin and Palmacosta that it's a little uncomfortable.

"Hey, Kratos…" He thinks about groaning because he knows that tone of voice. Her stream of questions are about as endless as the river of Time, but he supposes that her curiosity is just another one of her many quirks. "Did people actually used to believe in Summon Spirits? Like, as a religion?"  
"The half-elves practiced it as their religion until…" Until Mithos had gone insane and they'd all changed the very structure of the world. "When I was a child, humans were already beginning to stop practicing it."

"Then what was the humans' religion? They must have had something."

"If they had another religion, I know nothing of it. My family was never very big on church-going."

"But people still celebrate Celsius Day. That doesn't make any sense." Anna declared. "Celebrating something without even remembering what it is you're celebrating."

"Yuan said much the same thing. As did Celsius, now that I think of it."

"You've met Celsius?"

"We did have to get the help of the Summon Spirits." Kratos reminded her.

"I know _that_. It just feels weird to actually hear you say that you met a Summon Spirit. They're not much more than legend now, remember?" Anna leaned forward, wrapping her arms around her calves, eyes shining eagerly. "What was Celsius like?"

"She's very…arrogant, in her own way. Full of pride."

"Let me guess, not a very welcoming personality?"

"What makes you say that?"

"Summon Spirit of Ice. And considering what Flanoir is like, she doesn't strike me as a…warm…person."

Kratos chuckled. "No, she most certainly is not."

He stiffens ever so slightly and Anna looks around, searching for the sign of his discomfort. "What is it?" She asks.

"Desians. I can hear their boots." He stands and half-pulls Anna to her feet. "Down the stairs, quickly."

Anna obeys automatically. She could ask questions later. "Should we hide in the shops?" She's nearly tripping over the damned skirts of the dress. This was the last time, she swore viciously in her mind, last time she wore a dress. She'd only worn it now because a woman in a dress was less obvious than one in breeches, but next time, she was not putting up with this.

"No. If they're here to search for you, the shops are the first place they'll look. Into the inn."  
"The innkeeper'll see us and that'll take forever." Anna reminds him.

"There's a side door. Go through there."  
The inn was nearly empty, maids scurrying about their work. Anna dashed across the hall to an empty room, Kratos following not a step behind her. She hooked the DO NOT DISTURB sign around the doorknob and shut the door, sliding the deadbolt into place.

"You think they'd give up after a year." Anna said, sitting on a freshly made bed.

"Not if they're under orders." Kratos stayed near the door, hand on the hilt of his sword and glancing around the room as if the enemy would appear from the floorboards.

"A wonderful end to productive day, wouldn't you say?"

"That's one way to phrase it."  
Fists banged on the door. "Desian search! Open the door!"

"Real polite guys, ain't they?" Anna muttered. "We have to get them to go away."

"Quickly too, otherwise they'll break down the door."

Anna looked throughout the room, searching for something to use for a distraction. "Inns are damn useless sometimes."

Then she remembered the sign on the door and stood up on the bed, beginning to jump up and down. Kratos stared at her. "What in heaven's name are you _doing?"_

"We have to make them not want to come in here, right? Well, this is going to give them that impression." The more she bounced on the bed, the more it squeaked. She hoped it sounded like what she was trying to get it to sound like. No one ever liked walking into scenes like that, right? "Well, get up here and help! I'm too light!"

"This is absolutely ridiculous."

"It's also easier and less conspicuous than cutting our way through those Desians out there." Anna retorted.

"That wasn't Plan A." Kratos said, eyes flicking to the door as the pounding became louder.

"Then what was?"

"Climbing out the window. What did you think it was?"

Anna stopped bouncing, having only just noticed the window against the far wall. "You're the plan guy, not me." She started to step down, but stepped on the hem of her dress and would have toppled over had she not caught the very edge of the bedpost.

Kratos held out a hand to help her down and she accepted it, still cursing the dress under her breath. "I really need to work on the clumsiness thing."

The corner of his lip quirked into a smile, even as he looked back at the door that was shaking with the force of several people shoving their shoulders against it. "You think?"

Anna shot him a glare even as she hoisted herself over the windowsill. Luckily, they were only on the first floor, but that didn't mean much in a town where most of the buildings were well off the ground. There was about a foot of space before the edge of the cliff. She carefully lowered herself to the ground, Kratos following.

"Asgard is starting to feel really unfriendly." Anna commented as they walked carefully along the side of the building.

"Desians tend to make that happen."

"Now, remind me…why aren't you flying both of us out of here?"

"We can't be seen."

She turns to him, sweeping an arm to indicate the area around them. "I don't see anyone but us out here and it won't take the Desians long to think of the window and there's sure to be a few by the front entrance. Besides, aren't you fast enough to get us out of here before they can even see us?"

"We might fly into a cliff." Kratos warns. "It's windy."

Anna glanced at the cliff faces. But then she remembers the ranch and she doesn't have to think about it anymore. "Let's do this."  
He wraps one arm around her waist—it's his left, naturally. He always needs his sword arm free—and the warm is perhaps a few degrees warmer because his wings are made of pure mana and mana is energy and heat is a form of energy before they're shooting into the sky.

It's not nearly as terrifying as it had been the first time and at least this time, she was facing him so she had a handhold rather than just flailing as they flew. It was still alarming to see the ground grow smaller beneath her and the clouds didn't taste sugary, like she'd imagined as a child. They tasted simply like water, like the mist that hung over the lake on autumn mornings.

Anna shifts her arm, which was around Kratos' neck and says, "This is incredible."

"I'm glad you think so."

She turned to see him better, reading the look in his eyes. "You don't like flying, do you?"  
"Not particularly, no."

_("A mercenary. It doesn't suit you. You look more like the guy who prefers to stay—what's the word I'm looking for—grounded, I guess…)_

Anna chuckled at the memory of what she'd said, pressing her forehead against his collarbone. She'd certainly hit the nail on the head with that one.

-/-/-/-

"Any luck?" Yuan asks from where he is nearly buried in piles of files and thick tomes. Anna feels a pang of guilt after reading one of the titles of the books. They were medical journals and the files were all on Exspheres. Yuan was doing all of this extra research for her.

"No definite 'yes's. And the Desians showed up."

Yuan's head jerks up to look up at them for the first time since they walked in the room. His eyes focus on Anna, as if to make sure that she's there and not back in the ranch. "Clearly, you managed to get away."  
"Not without a certain creativity."

Yuan frowns at him. "Do I want to know?"

"We had some rather…different…escape plans." Anna says sits with her back against the wall, just out of the boundary of Yuan's fortress of information.

Yuan glances back to make sure he has room before leaning back on his palms. "I can't wait to hear this."  
After they finish explaining, Yuan shakes his head. "Only you, Anna, would think of that."

"Hey, it might have worked."

"'Might' being the operative word."

"You're impossible sometimes."

"You sound more and more like him," Yuan didn't even have to say Kratos' name anymore. "Everyday."  
Anna shrugs. It had stopped bothering her. Kratos bends to pick up one of the tomes, flipping through it. "Did you find anything of use?"  
"Nothing more than we already knew. Truly, the dwarves are protective of their secrets."

"Why not find one then? Or did Cruxis employ all the dwarves?"

"Most of them, yes. We're still searching for Dirk. He said he could make us Key Crests for the prisoners, but unfortunately, Yggdrasill discovered us. We were lucky to have scraped by with the lie that we did. Who knows where he is now."

"You keep searching for him. You have a knack for finding people when they don't want to be found." Even if he wasn't trying because he'd found Mithos and Martel after they'd gone into hiding. "The dwarves and the elves have shared information for centuries. I'll check with the elves."

Yuan's smile is crooked and touched with age-old bitterness. "They always did like you better, those elves."

-/-/-/-

Anna sees very little of Yuan and Kratos for the next week or so. The glimpses of Yuan that she got at dinner only told her that he was tired. He seemed distracted and he ate quickly, hardly speaking to anyone the times that he even came down for dinner.

Kratos she didn't see at all for the first few days, which wasn't so strange. The one time she managed to catch him at breakfast, he looked a little haggard and rather frustrated.

"Are things not going so well?" She asked, refilling his coffee mug. It's automatic now, these little things like knowing how the other takes their coffee.

Kratos took a grateful sip of coffee. "Elves, living so much longer than humans and even half-elves, live and work much more slowly. Things get done, just not as quickly as I would like them to be."

"You think you'd be used to that kind of thing. You _are_ older than them."

"True. But I've never been able to work as slowly as they do. Not part of my blood, I suppose."

Anna smiled. "Now that I think on it, how _can_ you use magic if you're not elven?"

_(Blood brothers…hurry…no other choice…)_

"Desperate times call for desperate measures." Is all he says because to explain it all would take so much time and he's not even sure that he can explain how it all happened.

Anna knows that she could press him for answers, like she's aching to do, but she can sense that this is one of those _personal_ things, so she refrains.

"Don't the elves hate humans?"  
"They're not fond of them, but their hate is reserved mostly for half-elves."

Anna hooks a stool to sit on, spreading grape jelly on her toast. "Why am I not surprised. And they're agreeing to help you so easily…why?"

"I try to make it a point to visit the elves at least once a century." His fingers tighten momentarily on the mug. It's a visit of necessity—as much as Kratos likes the ancient trees and the serenity, the elves' attitudes are enough to make the visits unpleasant—because he can't let history vanish altogether. The Storyteller is the only one to know even the slightest hint of the truth and Kratos makes sure that the next generation knows that hint as well as the previous one did.

Anna can see his dislike for having to go back to elven territory with elven politics, so she splits her nutcake in two and gives him the slightly larger half.

-/-/-/-

The great libraries in the elven lands haven't changed very much in the last century. There are still shelves upon neat shelves of scrolls and leatherbound texts; some of the books were written on sheepskin, others on bamboo in the style of Mizuho. The scent of aged pages and fresh air combine in this place and Kratos can easily say that this place has a relaxing feel to it.

He is thumbing through ancient texts—he made a mental note to learn dwarven, as it was taking much longer than it should to translate some of this—when he hears cat-soft steps on the wooden floors.

"Such a strange place for you to be, wouldn't you say?" Yggdrasill is standing directly in the doorway, watching Kratos in the lazy way of panthers watching their prey. "Especially when you're supposed to be in Sylvarant searching for the rebels."

Kratos remembers to keep calm and doesn't let the thoughts of what this could mean for the Renegades. _(Failure and exposure…everyone dead in a flash of white…)_ "I was searching for information."  
Yggdrasill glides across the room to where Kratos is standing and skims over the page the book in his hands is open to. "Dwarven writings on Key Crests, a rather…interesting…topic to be reading up on."

The lie comes easily. "If the rebels got the prisoners out, logically that means they care for their wellbeing."  
"Logically."

"Yes. And if they do, then they would search for a way so that they weren't harmed by the Exspheres attached to them. As they clearly have an insider in Cruxis, they would know that all the dwarves in Tethe'alla and Sylvarant are in Cruxis' employ, so they would need to be able to make a Key Crest themselves. I thought that checking these texts might give me a clue as to where they might be."

Yggdrasill makes a sound in the back of his throat. "Interesting. Kratos…why don't you walk with me a while?"

"I must get back to researching, else the rebels are likely to never be caught."

Yggdrasill's smile is venomously sweet. "Did I give you the impression I was asking?" 

-/-/-/-

Anna doesn't bother to knock before she walks into Yuan's office. He'd probably heard her coming from down the hall. She'd come up to ask if he was coming down for dinner—he'd missed it the last few days and while he didn't need to eat, he still liked to—but seeing the expression on his face made her stop right in front of him.

"What's wrong?" She doesn't ask if anything had happened because he wouldn't look so exhausted, so worried if nothing had happened.

"Kratos should have checked in by now."

"Maybe he got held up." Anna suggested.

"I thought of that. But there's been no sign of him for the last three days. I went to Tethe'alla today to ask the Storyteller or any of the elves had seen him, but nothing."

"No sign of him at all?"

"None." He rubbed his forehead.

"What do we do?"

"Keep searching. Not that I think it'll be much good. If Kratos doesn't want to be found, he won't be. Simple as that."

"But that's the thing. Even if he hadn't wanted to be found, he would've told you about it."

Yuan sighed. "We can only pray for the best now."


	22. Chapter 22

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Had to go up to Vermont to bury my cousin, so sorry that this is a little late. There was lots of crying, as can be expected, but it helped, I think. Sad as the occasion was, I'm glad I got to go. Vermont is beautiful and I got to see family that I hadn't seen in…forever…and family I hadn't met, so it was, in a kind of twisted way, worth it. Even if I did have to take two planes (And I hate flying) and the flights got delayed and there was a ridiculous amount of turbulence and we got squished into small cars and vans.

Swanton is a beautiful town and the people there are so incredible for all they did for Anthony.

This is all before Tales of Symphonia.

-/-/  
_  
"I can't stay with her anymore because she doesn't exist."_

"_I'm the only thing you do believe in anymore."_

"_I wish. I wish more than anything. But I can't imagine you with all your complexity, all your perfection, all your imperfection. Look at you. You are just a shade of my real wife. You're the best I can do, but I'm sorry. You are just not good enough."_

_-Dom and Mal__** (Inception)**_

-/-/

He doesn't want to see anymore, doesn't want to relive the horrors he's seen in his four thousand years of life. As hard as he tries to fight it, he can't break free and all he's seeing is the faces of dead friends, dead enemies, too many dead.

Sometimes, he can even remember their names. He doesn't remember their voices, their likes and dislikes. Doesn't remember the way they smiled or the way they looked. He's grateful for that because he's sure that if he did remember that _(Like he knows Yuan does because Yuan has perfect, photographic memory) _he's sure he'll spew up anything in his stomach.

He fights it, he does, but a human mind is naturally weaker than the minds of those with magical blood and Mithos had always excelled at the magic of the mind_ (Not Yggdrasill because Mithos' brand of cruelty is subtler and far more dangerous)_

-/-/-/-

Anna is scouring through Cruxis' archives. If Kratos had been captured, they would have recorded it. But so far, nothing.

A mug appeared at her elbow. "Drink." A familiar, slightly hoarse voice said. Anna looked over at Yuan. He looked as tired as she felt. Anna obeys, sipping at the scalding coffee gratefully. "Any luck?"

"Nothing. You?"

Yuan leaned his hip against the console. "The search team for the Iselia region just came back. Nothing. I'm still waiting for confirmation from the others."

"Have you sent out search parties in Tethe'alla?"

"I have to be a little more careful—soldiers aren't as common a sight there—but yeah, they're going around. I've asked the elves to be on the lookout for him and I've got Mizuho's information network on it."  
Anna held up a hand. "Slow down. What's Mizuho?"  
"It's a hidden village of ninjas in Tethe'alla. They're involved in just about everything, so I'm hoping they'll be able to find some clue as to what happened." Yuan looks her over, takes in the sight of the dark smudges beneath her eyes, messily put up hair and her slightly trembling hands. "You haven't been sleeping, have you?'

It's a sign of her exhaustion that she doesn't snap at him. Really, he mused, most people got snarly when they didn't get enough sleep. Anna calmed down. It was the strangest thing. "Did you really expect me to?"

"No, but I hoped you might have the sense to. Just because I can go without sleep doesn't mean that you can."  
"I've slept." Anna protests.

"Oh really? How long?" Yuan knows it can't have been more than an hour or so of rest and even then, it had probably been collapsed over a desk because her body was simply too tired.

"Enough."

"Anna, get some sleep. I'll take over."

She rose slowly from the chair. "Don't let me sleep for too long."  
"Of course not."

Anna doesn't go up the stairs to her room, instead choosing to collapse on the small cot they'd set up in the corner of the room. She doesn't think she could sleep in her bed on nights like tonight anyway. She tugs the thin sheet over herself tiredly, setting the coffee mug on the ground beside her. She wishes she could fall asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow, but thoughts of Kratos dead keep running through her mind are keeping her awake.

When Anna finally does fall asleep, it's to the rhythmic tapping of Yuan's fingers on a keyboard.

-/-/-/-

"Why do this?" His voice is scratchy now and he's got a throbbing headache.

"You believed I was an idiot, didn't you?" Yggdrasill is circling him with that panther grace. "That I didn't believe you were the traitor?"  
Now that Kratos knew what to hide—he'd already had an idea, but all of his concentration hadn't been focused on keeping Yggdrasill out of any knowledge of the Renegades—he doesn't have to worry about everything else. "I'm not."

"No?"

"No."

Yggdrasill bends so that he can look at Kratos, chained to a chair. His hair falls over one shoulder like a waterfall of gold. "I think you're lying to me."

"Can't change what you think, can I?"

It's strange to hear things like that out of Kratos' mouth these days. He'd had a dry wit ever since Mithos had first met him, but it had been muted, nearly silenced, in the days since _that_ day four thousand years ago. The day that Martel had died.

"It would be interesting if you could, wouldn't you say?"  
Kratos met Mithos' eyes head on. No fear in him, not even now. Mithos didn't torture someone physically. Not usually. Not when he could do so much more damage mentally and emotionally. "We'll never find out."

"No…I suppose not…"

He's plunged into the nightmares once more. The memories are further back this time, not of the war, but of all that happened before they'd become involved.

_(Wouldn't dare…Run!...shame…disgrace…Name's Martel…)_

-/-/-/-

"I'm perfectly capable of helping out with the search parties." Anna said, having to quicken her pace to keep up with Yuan's fluid stride.

"I'm not disagreeing with you."

"Then why are you keeping me here? Kratos is my friend do, dammit and-"

"If it was Cruxis that got him, than they're on high alert. They'll be on the lookout for you and we can't afford to lose you as well."  
Anna thought about arguing, knew that she could, but then looked, really looked, at Yuan. He was as stressed and tired as he'd been in the two weeks since Kratos' disappearance, but he looked relieved to have something to do other than go through report after report and listen to other people's findings. If there was one thing that Yuan enjoyed, it was field work and in cases like this, it certainly helped. But beyond all that, there was concern. Yuan liked to have his people where he knew he could keep them safe. The fact that it was Kratos who'd gone missing only made it that much worse.

So she doesn't argue and stops walking. As the search parties mount their horses, Anna wishes them good luck before going back into the cool shade of the base. There was still work she could do from here.

-/-/-/-

"I recognize that woman." Yggdrasill begins conversationally. He sits across from Kratos, studying his reaction. There's a flutter of eyelids as Kratos struggles back to full consciousness and there's a sudden tension in the lines of his body that hadn't been there two moments ago. "The Angelus Project, isn't she?"

Kratos cleared his dry throat before speaking. "I don't know who you're talking about."  
"No? So you wouldn't recognize a woman of, oh, about five and a half feet tall, brown hair, brown eyes, a scar on her left cheek?" Yggdrasill watched as Kratos closed his eyes briefly, pressing his lips together. "Fiery one, isn't she?" He added, recalling the things he'd just seen in Kratos' mind.

It was one of the side effects of an Exsphere. They make it much easier for the soul to exist separately from the body, therefore making it easier for memories to be accessed by magic. It wasn't a side effect that was publicly known. After all, magic dealing with the mind had been a rare branch to study when they were children. These days? People were fortunate if they knew it existed.

"I know her. What's your point?"  
"The point is that you know where the Angelus Project is and you haven't thought to mention this to me. Sounds like betrayal to me."  
"I'm not using her against you." Kratos points out. "You still have all your files, all of your research from the Angelus Project. I could have left you having to start over entirely."

"Very true. So why break her out if you didn't plan on overthrowing me?"

Kratos gave him his usual look in situations like these (He long ago gave up dwelling on whether or not it was a bad thing that things like this had become 'usual'). The look was blank and mask-like.

To that, Yggdrasill simply said, "You always did prefer the hard way."

-/-/-/-

There are two maps that take up a good portion of the wall in the planning room. One of Tethe'alla and the other of Sylvarant. The cities are marked with bright yellow thumbtacks. The places where they've searched for Kratos and haven't found a trace of him have red thumbtacks.

At least half of both maps are dotted in red thumbtacks. There's a small matchbox with green ones that's been untouched since they put the maps up.

Doria is concerned about Anna. Anna trains harder than anyone else in the morning and for longer hours. That wasn't unusual. Anna had an incredible amount of determination. But doing that on little to no sleep with few meals in between were beginning to take their toll. She looked like she had one foot in the grave.

But when Doria tries to get her to sit for a moment, to eat or rest or _breathe_, Anna fights and argues and goes back to work. Botta had watched it once and once Anna had left the room, had merely shrugged.

"She spends too much time with them." There's no need for Doria to specify who 'them' is.

"And that's why she's working herself so hard. Why we all are."

Doria finds that she can't argue with that.

-/-/-/-

The memories he finds are individual ones. None of them give him any picture as to where the Angelus Project actually was. There were small things, like sharing a bowl of fruit, or reading a note in a familiar hand. Then there were others. Walking through a market on a cloudy day, training out in the hot sun, her defiant face when he found her in the ranch.

Yggdrasill watches them all on replay, looking for clues, anything that might hint as to where the Angelus Project was or to see if he could find a pattern. He sees it only by accident. It was something he caught on the edges of his peripheral vision, like a ghost or shadow.

When he sees it, he tries to think of when he'd seen it before. It was like seeing someone you'd met only once on the street years later and trying to remember their name. He runs it over and over in his mind until he remembers, vaguely, where he'd seen it.

It had been on Yuan's face four thousand years ago.

-/-/-/-

Anna has nightmares. Many of them. Though, on the plus side, at least they weren't nightmares from the ranch. These were newer and far less welcome. The details varied, but the subject matter was much the same. Kratos hurt, bleeding, bruised, battered, broken and many other B words that Anna didn't like to think about.

She's becoming accustomed to waking and seeing Botta's blurry face hovering above hers. He asks about the nightmares the first time, asks if Anna'd like to talk about anything, but she refuses. Now, he simply offers a mug of hot coffee or tea and lets her be.

The maps are becoming more and more filled with red and the more they glance at it when they're working, the worse they feel and, at the same time, the harder they work. Perhaps that was what being a Renegade was, Anna muses one afternoon as she sips her tea and watches everyone work. Knowing that the odds were against you, but still willing to fight anyway.

-/-/-/-

It doesn't take much to modify the technology of the Derris Emblem. This one is much more specific and much more painful than the original, but the basis of it is the same. Needle the doubts and fears in a person into something much more formidable.

Kratos stares at Anna. It can't be her. She was back on the base, safe. He was in Derris-Kharlan. But it looked exactly like Anna, down to the shade of her eyes to the scar on her cheek. It's all he can do to continue reminding himself where he is and where she isn't.

But it is damn hard when she's staring at him like that.

"You are somethin' else, y'know that, Kratos?" Her accent is the same as well; the lazy roll of her consonants and the slight slur to her words. "Look at this place. Our base doesn't have much when you compare it to this."

You're on Derris-Kharlan, Kratos reminds himself. She's not here. Yggdrasill is trying to weed out information.

"How'd you ever get it in your head that we could fight it? That we could win?" the not-Anna says, hands clasped behind her back in that way that she always did when looking at something that caught her attention. She wasn't looking at him, but at Derris-Kharlans utter whiteness.

He knows that this isn't the real Anna, can see it in the way that the spitfire that made her Anna wasn't there. There was defiance and fire, but it wasn't the steely cover for slight fragility that was Anna. Mithos' projection, his illusion of her seemed so much more mechanical, so much more methodical than the real one, but it was more than convincing enough for Kratos to doubt it.

Kratos isn't sure how long he sits there, hearing her voice echo through Derris-Kharlan's emptiness and watching her move about, but he knows that he bites the inside of both cheeks bloody so that he doesn't let words escape his mouth and give away what he isn't sure is even real anymore.

-/-/-/-

Anna is half-stumbling down the stairs to get a new pot of coffee when she hears the front door open. She listens for familiar voices bantering or shouting to let someone know that they'd arrived, but hears nothing. A moment later, she hears Noishe bark and dash past her from where he must have taken his customary guard place by the back door to the kitchen.

Anna keeps a hand on the knife at her belt as she follows him. There had been people coming and going from the base for near a month now since they began the search parties. It wasn't impossible for someone to have tracked them here. Nearly impossible and bloody difficult, yes. Actually impossible, no.

But when she sees who's at the door, her heart stops. "Heavens above…"

She nearly doesn't recognize him, pale and battered as he is, but she knows that hair and when he looks up tiredly, she knows that face. Noishe is nudging his hip with his head, and is licking at his hands. His hands move to pet at Noishe's long ears, but the movement holds none of the fluidity and grace that it usually did.

Anna shouts for Botta even as she's jogging to Kratos, checking to make sure he's alright. He isn't injured, or rather, he isn't bleeding. She's not sure that he really needs supporting—he had to have gotten here somehow and she doubts that a horse was involved—but when she slings one of his arms over her shoulder, she does it as much for her own benefit as for his. He's solid, _there_, for the first time in a month and she's really hoping this isn't one of her nightmares.

Botta is running down the stairs when he sees her supporting him. "What the hell happened?"

"You really think I could tell you? You're overestimating me."

"I'll contact Yuan and the search parties." Botta says. "Do you need anything?"  
Anna refuses. Informing Yuan, who she knew had to be the one to be told about this, was more important. Something was…off…about Kratos. Anna couldn't pin what it was, beyond the silence, but it was there. She gets a washcloth, antiseptic and a bowl of water from the bathroom in this hall before sitting next to him on the bed.

She's reaching for his shirt hem to lift it over his head so she can check him over for wounds when his hand catches her wrist. Anna's about to snap at him out of instinct when she sees it. "Your hands are shaking." His hands had always been perfectly steady, whether it was when he was healing her, training with people or writing.

The familiar red-tinted eyes stare at her. "You're alright." She isn't sure whether it's a question or a statement. Kratos had added that slight lilt that could have made it either/or.

Anna tucks a lock of hair behind her ear with her free hand. "I'm fine. _You're_ the one who's been who-knows-where."

"I saw you dead."

Anna doesn't know what he's talking about, so she chooses to focus on what she does know. "I'm very clearly _not_ dead, Kratos."

He doesn't seem to quite believe her, his grip on her wrist tightening ever so slightly. Some part of Anna's mind, the one that was still a little uncomfortable about the whole 'bruises have to be real' thing, sets off the lightest of warning bells. But, Anna's rational portion of her brain reasons, if he did want to hurt me (not that Kratos ever had willingly) it wasn't as though she could do much about it. Kratos was stronger and faster than anyone else living, save for Yuan and Yggdrasill. Anna couldn't do anything about that.

"I'm not dead." She repeats when he's still staring at her.

The next thing she knows, Kratos was tugging her closer and pressing his lips to hers. Anna breaks away automatically and fights down any instinctive response other than that._ (He's not in his right mind, she reminds herself. He'd been tortured for most likely a month)_ She forces herself to focus on business.

"Are you hurt?"

"No."

The answer is a little too immediate and he doesn't quite meet her eyes when he says it. Anna has a feeling it has something to do with the antiseptic being in view_ (not with the fact that she'd pushed him away. Of course not.)_.

"You'd best not be lying to me."

"I'm fine." It's an almost-lie, a not-quite-truth, but Anna accepts it. What did she know about torture victims anyway? _(More than she wants to because the ranch was full of them)_ "Simply tired."

She dips the rag in the cold water and carefully cleans away the dirt and sand from the road away from his face. Kratos allows it because it's as refreshing as it is cleansing.

"You should rest." Anna tells him. "At least for a couple of hours." Remembering her own time recently out of the ranch, remembering how relieved she'd felt when she'd seen blue skies and smelled breakfast cooking in the mornings those days on the road with Kratos, she adds, "Don't worry. I'll still be here when you wake up, with coffee."

A ghost of a smile flickers across Kratos' lips. Noishe curls up on the bed, head never far from Kratos' hand. Anna goes to get coffee for the both of them, greedily drinking hers. It had been a long day, a long month, and coffee was currently essential and it was just distracting enough to keep her thoughts away from the kiss. Pleasant though it had been, she's sure that Kratos wouldn't have done it had he been feeling himself.

When she returns to her room, Kratos is dead to the world, Noishe right beside him. Anna grabs a book from the small collection growing on her dresser before sitting in her armchair, legs hooked over one arm, her back resting against the other. She tugged a blanket over herself. Not because she was cold, but simply for the reason that she liked being under a blanket.

When Yuan comes in hours later, Noishe is the only one still awake. The protozoan raises his head when he hears Yuan enter before lying back down. The half-elf glances at Anna, book open on her stomach and sleeping peacefully for the first time in a month.

-/-/-/-

Anna is still sleeping long after Kratos stirs to life.

"You look like hell." Yuan says once he and Kratos are out of the room and therefore out of earshot of Anna. "What happened?"  
"Mithos happened."  
Yuan's eyes darkened dangerously. "That son of a bitch. Did he find out anything?"

"I've been wondering much the same, but I doubt that if he did learn anything that I'd be here right now."

Yuan looks Kratos up and down slowly, searching for any injury. Anna might have accepted that he was uninjured, but Yuan knows Mithos' brand of cruelty and while it didn't usually extend to lasting physical injury, Mithos _was_ insane and anything could happen.

Seeing that he was unharmed (Physically at least), Yuan glanced up and down the hall—it was still early, perhaps a few hours past midnight, but the Renegades were accustomed to keeping odd hours—before asking, "What did he do?"

Kratos explained shortly, quietly, but it was more than enough. Yuan doesn't want to imagine what it would have been like if he'd seen Martel say the things that Kratos had heard Anna say.

Yuan crosses his arms, and really looks at Kratos. "Are you going to be okay?"

Kratos nods. Yuan hadn't expected a different answer, but sometimes Kratos surprised him. Kratos was a little more battered, a little more scarred after what Mithos had done to him—and Yuan had to go back to Derris-Kharlan to find out why, exactly, Mithos had let Kratos go—but he would heal, would become the strong man once again.

Kratos opened his mouth, closed it, before saying, "…I kissed her."

Yuan has to take a moment to process it. At first, he thinks that Kratos meant the not-Anna, the illusion, but then he knows that, had that been the case, Kratos wouldn't have seen fit to mention it. "You did what?"

Kratos looks away. "I'm not repeating it."

Yuan can't help the short laugh that escapes his lips. "It's about damn time! What was her reaction?"

"I get to tell you I told you so." Kratos said, looking back at him. The garnet eyes are tired and suddenly look every one of his four thousand plus years.

"You _were_ half-dead when she found you, or so Botta tells me and most likely half-mad as well. She wouldn't have done it otherwise."

Kratos sincerely hopes that Yuan's right.


	23. Chapter 23

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Sorry for taking so long. Had to play a lot of catch-up since I was gone for so long from school. Got a field trip to SeaWorld with my Marine Bio class coming up soon and it seems like the hot weather is finally letting up.

Got the day off—thank God!—even if I have no idea why. Watched pieces of Ponyo during the commercials of House. Gotta say, I didn't like it as much as I liked Miyazaki's other movies. It was lacking…something, at least in my opinion.

Finally, what everyone's been waiting for is finally happening. :)

-/-/ 

_Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other but in looking outward together in the same direction. ~Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, __**Wind, Sand and Stars**__, 1939, translated from French by Lewis Galantière_

-/-/

When Kratos enters the kitchen the next morning, the first thing he sees is Doria beaming at him as she puts a plate of fresh pancakes out on the counter.

"Good morning." He says. The tiredness hadn't yet faded and he knows that training won't help any. He wonders how much he can get away with before his exhaustion wins out.

"It's wonderful to see you again, dear." Doria says. "You make her better, you know."

Kratos begins to grind the coffee beans. "I do what to who?"  
"Anna. She was down here for an early breakfast this morning. It's the first breakfast I've seen her eat since you disappeared. She's been living on coffee and a few bites of her dinner for near a month, poor thing."

"…Really...?" Kratos murmured. "I'm surprised you or Yuan didn't force-feed her."

"We tried, but you know how stubborn she is."

Kratos inhaled the strong scent of the coffee. "Yes, I do." He drank the hot beverage liquid quickly, feeling suddenly restless. He set the empty mug in the sink before turning towards the back door that led outside.

"She's not out there." Doria told him.

Kratos looked back at her. It had become a habit, a routine, that Anna was out training in the morning. Everyone in the base knew where to find her before breakfast. Kratos supposed that she could be sleeping off that exhaustion of hers, but he'd seen her be out there on less sleep and no breakfast.

He knocks once on her door—it's more of a warning than anything. He's coming in anyway—before entering. Kratos isn't entirely sure what he expects—for her to be sleeping, perhaps, or at least resting in bed—but to see her sitting on the windowsill, reading the book that had been resting open on her belly when he'd woken up earlier was not what it.

"That wouldn't be a teary book, would it?" It's the first thing that comes out of his mouth and Anna looks as confused as he feels. Perhaps the relief that she's alive, that she's well and here and not in Mithos' clutches is still working its way through his system.

"A _what?_" Anna asks, half-laughing.

"It's Yuan's term, not mine." And Kratos is going to kill him for ever coming up with it.

That only makes Anna laugh more. "Doesn't tell me what the hell you're going on about."

"One of those books that women like to read and they get teary-eyed over."

Anna arched an eyebrow, a smile still tugging at the corner of her lip. "Kratos, really? It's me. I've never gotten all _teary-eyed_ over a book in my life."

"I've learned never to put anything past you."

Anna, still chuckling, folded down the corner of her page. "And what happened to make you so nervous around 'teary books'?"  
"You're never going to let me forget that, are you?"  
Anna grinned. "Not a chance. So?"

Kratos' relief seems to be ever growing. She didn't hate him and she wasn't sick. "It's all Yuan's fault."

"As these things tend to be."

"Martel had been reading a book and he heard her crying-"

"Over the book."

"Right." Kratos remembers Martel telling him how absolutely ridiculous she felt over breakfast the next morning. Crying over words, events that had never happened. "_Stupid, isn't it?" She'd said, smiling over her biscuit._ "Naturally, Yuan runs into her tent thinking that she was hurt. She threw the book at him."

"At him or his general direction?" Anna inquired. It made a difference.

"Definitely at him. He was complaining about the bruise for the next few days."

"So his worry transferred over to you?"

"I'd rather not have a book hurled in my direction, if that's what you're asking."

Anna set the book down beside her before standing. "Let me guess, you're here because I'm not outside."

"It was a cause for concern. You've been out there everyday for a year, even if we told you not to be." There had been a few times in the last year that Anna had gotten sick—effects of the Cruxis Crystal parasitism, Yuan had diagnosed—and she'd still been out there training.

Anna shrugged and even as he looks at her, she looks older to him, tired. Life-tired. Kratos knows the feeling. "I dunno…I had every intention going to train, but I walked outside and looked out at the desert and I suddenly couldn't get myself to do it."

Kratos doesn't quite know what to say to that. He thinks he should, but he doesn't. It suddenly feels very awkward, standing just inside her door and it might as well have been an ocean rather than two feet between them.

"…What's the date?" He asks finally, simply because he doesn't like letting that kind of silence hang in the air.

Anna doesn't act like it's such a strange question. She remembers how it is to be trapped for so long that days blend and mesh together until days become seconds and hours become weeks. _(Y'know what else I learned today?...The date?...Besides that…)_ "April the…eleventh?"  
"Your words fill me with confidence." Kratos says dryly.

Anna glares playfully at him and instantly, the awkwardness lessens. She's been trying very hard not to think about last night _(He kissed you…He was half-mad…But he kissed you…and you pushed him away…)_ "You know I'm no good with dates."

"That's why Botta gave you a calendar, so that you have no excuse when you miss the debriefings." He reminds her.

Anna snorted. "Please. Like I ever use that. Right now, it's sitting right where I left it. In the communal pile." The communal pile was old or ill-fitting clothes, toys that some of the children were too old to play with, books that people were tired of reading; basically, it was the hand-me-downs, but for the entire base. "Or, it was, last time I checked."

Which had been over a month ago because she hadn't had time to worry about such little things.

And instantly, it is awkward between them once more. Kratos opens the door behind his back and can only think to say, "Glad to see you're alright." Before he leaves the room.

Anna doesn't go after him.

-/-/-/-

Botta raps his knuckles on the door before entering Yuan's office. Kratos is standing beside Yuan who was sitting and they were going over various diagrams and long scripts in what looked like dwarven.

Yuan is the one who looks up first. "Something wrong?"

"Have either of you seen Anna today?"

They glance at each other before looking back at Botta. "No. Why?"

"Because she was supposed to show up for her guard shift an hour ago. And Doria says she didn't come down for breakfast."

"Did you check her room?"

"I knocked. No one answered."

Yuan is immediately on his feet, following Kratos out of the room and down towards the living quarters. "You haven't heard any of the security be breached, have you?"  
Kratos shook his head. "No."

They push open her door and find nothing out of place. Her bed was made, the book she was still working on had a playing card as a bookmark. Her towel was flung over the back of the armchair. There was no sign of any kind of struggle, but there was also nothing indicating where she'd gone.

Someone else rushed in to the room. "Sirs!"

Both seraphim turned to the messenger. "What?"

"We've just discovered a security tape in which Anna appeared. She took a Rheiard."

Yuan frowned. "Do the records say where she was headed?"

"No sir."

"Did she enter Tethe'alla?"  
"The security tape doesn't show the entire hangar, sir. Only the door and the control modules."

"So we have no idea where she is." Yuan summed up.

"No sir."

Yuan ran a hand through his bangs. "Wonderful. I'll check around Tethe'alla then, see if there's been any sightings of her."

"She has no reason to go to Tethe'alla." Kratos reminds him.

"She has no reason to up and leave either."

"I'll check Sylvarant. You check the Desian's files to see if they've recaptured her somehow."

Yuan's instinct was telling him that Kratos shouldn't be the one to be searching, as his mind was still fragile from the torture, but he knew that, out of the two of them, he was the better suited for technological stuff, so he nodded. "Good luck."

-/-/-/-

Kratos flies while he searches, as uncomfortable as flying usually made him. It simply wasn't _natural _for humans to fly. He could feel traces of the mana the Rheairds ran on and it was much more pronounced here in Sylvarant where the mana levels were so much lower.

The path is a little erratic (not surprising, as Anna was the pilot) but it soars directly over the first places Kratos had thought she'd go. No Iselia, the town which, while being so close by, none of them ever visited, no Asgard or Luin. It's when the path veers towards Hima that Kratos gets a sinking feeling. Please, don't let her have gone where he was thinking she'd gone.

-/-/-/

"Lord Yggdrasill!"

Said person turns to the angels that were holding a woman by her upper arms. "Yes?"

"We found it lurking near the main teleporter. We thought you might want to deal with it."  
Yggdrasill looked at the woman and knew her, not from the one time he'd seen her, but from the memories Kratos had of her. "I shall. Leave her here."

The angels obeyed and bowed before they left the room. Yggdrasill leaned back against the desk that he was working on. This room was just outside of the room in which the Great Seed was kept and where he was planning on doing the transfer of Martel's soul, if there was ever a close enough match in mana signatures.

"Since they found you by the teleporters, I can only assume you're here for a specific purpose."

Anna squared her shoulders, pushing down any fear she had of this angel. "Yeah, I am."

"Are you going to tell me what that purpose is?"

"I was going to ask what the hell is the matter with you?"  
Yggdrasill blinked. Anna almost wanted to say he was surprised. That was a neat trick for a four thousand plus year old angel. "Excuse me?"

"What kind of person tortures someone else like that? I saw Kratos when he came back and I don't wanna know what you did to him, but I wanna know why."

"Information."

He hadn't been expecting her fist to lash out. He was able to block it at the last second, but it still skimmed his jaw. "You son of a bitch. Wasn't Kratos your teacher? Your _friend_?"

"Once."

Anna spat at the ground by his feet. "I've heard so many people being called monsters. Half-elves, humans. But I've never believed anyone really was one. Now I do. You're more of a monster than the stuff that people talk about from their nightmares."

Kratos' memories hadn't fully captured her. They hadn't captured the full essence of her fire, her _yusher_, as the elves called it.

"You presume much about me."

"Am I wrong?" Anna challenged, eyes flashing.

"Does it matter whether you are wrong or not?" Yggdrasill rose from his chair. She wasn't quite petite, but she was a tad on the short side, so he towered over her. "What is to stop me from killing you right now?"

Anna's left hand clenched, automatically drawing Yggdrasill's eyes to it. "It's this Angelus Project of yours, isn't it? I've been the only person that's been, even nearly, a success."

"There are plenty more humans to try again with." His eyes grew soft, dangerously so. "Like your sister, perhaps? She shares your blood. Logically, she should be a better choice for the experiments. Perhaps she might even do better than you did."

Anna stiffened. She had never met her sister, had only ever seen her from a distance in the short time that she lived in Yuan with Kratos, didn't even know the girl's name, but she never wanted her sister exploited to the kind of things that went down at the ranches.

Before Anna can protest, can snarl and snap at him with her volatile temper, she's being wrenched behind a very familiar person's back. There are pale blue feathers close to her face and they're warm where they touch her skin.

Yggdrasill is slightly surprised to see Kratos here, especially so soon after the torture. He's pale and a little thin, but his hand is on his sword and the look in his garnet eyes is much closer to the look that had been there when Mithos had first met him during the war.

"Keep away from her." He said, voice too calm.

"I see no reason why I should." Yggdrasill tilted his head, putting pieces of what he'd observed and heard together. "Curious though, how protective you are of her."

"Hey, I'm still in the room. Don't talk about me like I ain't here."

Kratos had been hoping that Anna would hold her tongue, but clearly not. If they got out of here alive, he'd ask her what she'd been thinking, coming to Derris-Kharlan.

"She's very brave—or foolish—to have come here."

"More like pissed off." Anna muttered. She doesn't bother raising her voice. She knows that they'll hear her loud and clear.

"Saucy, isn't she?"

It was a term Kratos hadn't heard in centuries. In fact, he's sure that he, Yuan and—apparently—Yggdrasill were the only ones who used it anymore. He can still remember one of the Healers that Martel used to work with would always complain about some of the younger recruits having too much 'sauce' and how they didn't respect their elders anymore.

"She can be." Kratos says cautiously.

Before Yggdrasill can reply, smoke is filling Derris-Kharlan. Kratos can hear yelling and it's familiar voices, Renegade voices, before he and Anna break out into a run. She can't see, but her instincts have been screaming at her to _get out of here_ ever since she stepped into Derris-Kharlan.

When Anna begins to veer in the wrong direction of the teleporter, Kratos grabs her hand, leading her even as he listens for any signs of Yggdrasill.

"Sir?"

"Botta, it's us."

The half-elf calms just a bit, but there's the tension that Kratos sometimes thinks never leaves him. "Quickly, get through so I can call everyone back."

Anna hates the feeling of teleporting, like her body is being stretched too thin and sucked through a tube. They're still running as they leave the teleporter. The teleporter is underground, in a cave just outside of the Tower of Salvation. It's an emergency entrance/exit and it's rather dark. Anna wonders who ever thought of the idea of an emergency exit being dark enough that it was difficult to see, but then she remembers that she's dealing with angels and the idea doesn't seem so strange anymore.

The other Renegades are running out of the teleporter behind them, everyone helpign each other onto the Rheairds before shooting into the sky. Kratos flies with Anna on the Rheaird that she'd taken here and he makes sure to go a little slower to ensure that they land after all the others had gotten into the base.

"What were you _thinking?_" He asks as soon as the Rheaird hangar is clear of all other people. "I've known you to be reckless, Anna, but going to Derris-Kharlan…"

Anna whirls at him. "You didn't see yourself when you came back. So sorry that I'm _human_ and I get angry when something like _that_ happens to someone I care about!"

"There is a difference between anger and sheer _stupidity_. Confronting Yggdrasill alone is the latter."  
"What does that say about you then? I saw you. You were ready to fight him back there and you didn't know that you had back-up, did you?"

"No, I didn't. I was too busy trying to _save your life_."

Anna bristles, automatically about to say that she could save her own damn self, thank you very much, but then remembers who she would've been up against and she calms. "I'm sorry for making you worry, alright? But it's about damn time someone gave that bastard a piece of their mind and I'm glad it was me."

-/-/-/-

"There weren't any casualties, were there?" Kratos asks Yuan.

"No. You've done a great job training them. There were injuries, naturally, but there weren't many that were too major and we fixed those up rather quickly."

The severity of those injuries is apparent on his face, pale as it is. Kratos makes a mental note to get make some restorative tonic into him before he retires for the night.

"How's Anna?"

"All things concerned, just fine." Kratos leaned his hip on the desk. "I'm more concerned with the fact that Yggdrasill let us go that easily, especially with the Angelus Project so close within his reach. I don't think I even heard him fight."

Yuan leans back into the chair, rubbing at a tired eye. "I'll ask him about it when I see him next. I'm sure I'll be called in soon anyway. After all, the Renegades did just invade Derris-Kharlan. Why did Anna go to Derris-Kharlan?"

"She believed that someone had to give Yggdrasill a 'piece of their mind'."

Yuan snorted. "That sounds like her. Don't worry. I'll stick her on double duty in Tethe'alla for a few days. See how she likes the cold."

-/-/-/

Yuan strides into her room a week later, not even pausing to knock as he usually did. Anna looks up, startled. "Yuan, I thought you were still back in Flanoir." Then, seeing the look on his face, she asked, "Did something go wrong over there?"

Yuan forced his voice to calmness. "What in the name of the seven hells are you doing?"

Anna looked baffled "I was brushing my hair."

"I'm not talking about what you were doing three minutes ago." Yuan is sure Kratos is going to murder him for getting involved, but Yuan was damn tired of seeing these two go in circles. And seeing as how Kratos hadn't taken to listening to any advice Yuan had given him, the half-elf was only left with the option to go to Anna. "I'm talking about Kratos. Why are you doing this to him?"

Yuan knows full well that Anna isn't doing anything to intentionally hurt Kratos, but he knows that if he presses that angle, Anna's temper will snap and perhaps he could get a straight answer out of her.

"I'm not doing anything to him." Anna said, suddenly defensive.

"That's my point." Yuan pinched the bridge of his nose and decides to slow it down, perhaps even backtrack it a little. "You care for him, don't you?"

"Of course I do."

"More than…just a friend and teacher?" Baby steps, Yuan reminds himself.

Anna sighed. At least he hadn't asked if she was in love with him because she would have no answer for him. "Yeah, I do."

"And what's your block here?" Yuan is trying his hardest to understand the situation, but he's never known such stubborn people in his life as Kratos and Anna (Or such considerate ones, even if they weren't the best at showing it.) and they confuse him, especially at times like this.

"The two times we've ever had any kind of contact like…that…it was during a Desian raid and because he just came back from a month of torture. Real heartwarming, ain't it?" Her temper was simmering to the surface.

Yuan can't help but chuckle at that because the answer was so simple and yet it wasn't. "Anna, believe me, had it been anyone else he'd been with at the time, the thought of kissing them would never have even crossed his mind."

Anna ran a hand through her hair, anger suddenly gone. "I don't know how to do any of this, Yuan."

"If it makes you feel any better, Kratos isn't much better in this subject than you are."

Anna raised a disbelieving eyebrow. "He's over four thousand years old. He _has _to be better at this than I am."

"Not by much. Even if he doesn't believe in the fairy tale stuff, he was never much of a manwhore."

Anna's lips twitched. "Let me guess, you were the manwhore."

"I prefer the term ladies' man." Anna snorted, the smile widening a little. "And it was only really while we were teenagers. But you're getting me off the point. Either you talk to him, soon, or I lock the both of you in a storage closet and leave you there until you talk it out. Your choice."

-/-/-/-

Yuan closed the door behind him and made a mental note to get some of that calming tea of Doria's. It worked wonders on headaches, like the one he could feel forming between his eyes.

He turned a corner and nearly ran into the very person he'd been hoping to avoid today.

Kratos frowned at him. "What've you done this time?"

"Why would I have done anything?"

"You're looking pale." Shit. Yuan tried to smile convincingly. An edge came into Kratos' voice. "Yuan?"

The half-elf clapped his friend on the shoulder. "Act a little nervous. It'll help."  
Before Kratos can process what he said, Yuan is dashing past him. A moment later, he was pulling up a stool beside Botta in the research department.

Botta froze, knowing that no good could come out of this. "Sir?" He begins cautiously.

Yuan's smile comes a little more easily this time. "Just thought I'd keep you company for a while."

"Why?'

"Do I really need a reason?'

"Yes."

Yuan leaned his forearms against the table. "Well, if we're all lucky and people decide to listen to me for once," Botta knows immediately who Yuan is talking about when he says 'people'. "Then it'll be rather obvious soon."

"Very well then. But after this, sir, you and I are going to have a little chat on respecting privacy."

Yuan smirked at that. "It does seem to be my day for little chats."

-/-/-/-

While Kratos was still trying to decipher Yuan's cryptic advice, he heard Anna's familiar footsteps coming out into the hall.

"Hey…talk with me a minute?" He turned to look at her and noted that she seemed unusually fidgety, her hand playing with a loose string in her shirt hem.

Kratos followed her inside her room, a little wary, especially after Yuan's…warning. "Is something wrong?" He hadn't noticed anything particularly out of the usual, other than Anna's one day of not feeling up to training a few days ago.

"How hard could this be?" Anna mutters. Before she loses any of the courage she'd managed to build up, she walks quickly across the room, braced her hands on his shoulders, raised herself up on her toes just a bit, pressed her lips against his for the briefest of moments before scurrying back away from him.

Kratos stood frozen, not quite sure what to do or say about the unexpected move. Anna tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, avoiding his eyes and a pink blush dusting her lips. "You don't seem very nervous."

In truth, he was terrified that he might say or do something idiotic. And he would have to have a little chat with Yuan about giving cryptic advice. "I am."

Anna sighed and began shifting her weight from foot to foot. Kratos hoped it wasn't a sign that she wasn't ready to bolt. She chuckled, but it was the exasperated kind that had no humor in them. "The love stories always make it sound so easy, don't they?"  
Kratos smiled slightly. "They do at that. But," He took a few slow steps closer. "Perhaps it's like everything else."

Anna eyed him warily, but didn't move. "How like everything else?"

"Easier with practice." He kissed her gently before pulling back.

"It might not go so well." Anna warned him.

"True. But I'd be willing to try if you are."

Her answer was everything he had hoped it would be.


	24. Chapter 24

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Agh. This chapter's proving hard to write. On the plus side, I get pina coladas at school from my 3D Composition teacher since he says we're doing such outstanding work. Mmmm….pina coladas…

Started getting back into Arc Rise Fantasia—I was in one of those lulls where I'd done the stage I was stuck on enough times that I'd had enough—and it's got the Symphonia spark that I love, with the characters and the complex storyline. Still a little confused, but I think it's because I still haven't connected the politics of it all together. And…I totally called one of the supposed 'plot twists' of the game. Won't get very far into it, but I was spazzing about calling it and my cousin comes into my room, gives me a weird look and walks away. It brightened my Sunday.

Replaying Twilight Princess, but this time it's the Wii version. Darn layouts are flipped from the Gamecube version, so I've been trying to get used to it.

Headed to Seaworld tomorrow for our Marine Bio field trip. :)

-/-/ 

_Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore_

-/-/

Kratos pushed a box across Yuan's desk before sitting across from him. The half-elf looked up, confused. The words on the sides of the box told him that the box was from the best bakery in Tethe'alla. "What's this?"

"Open and find out." Kratos said. Intrigued, Yuan undid the ribbon and cautiously opened the box. Kratos would have figured out that Yuan had talked to Anna about their relationship—or lack thereof—and Yuan wasn't entirely sure he trusted Kratos not to have made an elaborate jack-in-the-box (Yuan _hated_ clowns).

But no clown sprang out, which prompted Yuan to open it completely. There was a single cinnamon bun sitting on tissue paper in the center of the box.

"What prompts the treat?" Yuan asked, ripping off a piece and popping it in his mouth, pushing the box towards the center of the desk.

Kratos reaches in the box to take a small piece of the pastry. "You deserve some kind of thank you."

"And here I thought that my thank you was going to be some kind of prank."

"You would have deserved it." Kratos tells him. "I specifically told you to stay out of it."

"I do more good than harm." Yuan replied, leaning back with another piece of cinnamon bun. It had been his favorite sweet since he'd first tried it at the bakery that had been on the path to Kratos' school.

"In your own mind."

The half-elf smirked. "Well, considering my thank you, clearly it's not just in my head. I take it the conversation went well?"

"It went just fine."

His smirk widened. "I think it went better than just fine, but I'll stay out of it."

Kratos snorted. "Unlikely."

"Are you calling me nosy, sir?"

"Absolutely." Kratos glanced at the papers spread across Yuan's desk. "No luck with tracking the dwarf down?"

"Dwarves are surprisingly elusive. How are things with translating the dwarven texts?"

"Their script is frustratingly different than common, or even elven."

"I'd hope so." Yuan said dryly. "Dwarves and elves have never been particularly fond of each other."

"I think that that is one thing that is likely to never change. The dwarves found a way to put some kind of magic in their ink that scrambles the letters."

Yuan leaned forward. "Are you serious?"

Kratos slipped a hand in his pocket—he'd taken to carrying the texts with him in his pocket and he would take them out from time to time during the day to see if anything had changed—and held it out to him. "See for yourself."

Yuan unfolded the creased and wrinkled paper, staring in amazement as the runes melded and morphed before his eyes. Entire lines disappeared and others began, sometimes in the corners of pages and other times going vertically. It looked like madness itself had been inked into the blocky characters.

"This is…incredible." The half-elf breathed.

"You say that now. Once you try to decipher it long enough, it will start to annoy you."

"I'm sure." Yuan murmured, running a hand along the page. He could feel the barest trickles of magic, like little pinpricks all along his fingertips. "…How do you suppose they do this?"

"With their own hidden arts, naturally."

"Well, obviously, but I meant, how does the magic sustain itself? It isn't drawing any mana from the surrounding air." Yuan held the parchment up to the light. "Perhaps it's the paper?"

"You bring up an excellent point, but I doubt that it's the parchment itself that's doing it."

"This…this is fascinating." Yuan examined the text carefully and Kratos took another piece of the cinnamon bun before standing back. He knew that Yuan was a technician, an analyst. He might see something that Kratos had missed. "I could probably figure out what held the magic if you gave me some time."

"Do your best. I was getting sick of looking it at it anyway."

"I don't see why."  
"You've always loved your puzzles."

"You like things too simple." Yuan accused, not looking up.  
"So sorry if I like to avoid complications."

This time, Yuan did look up, a slow smirk on his lips. "If that were the case, I don't think you'd have gone through all that you have over this past year." Seeing the look in Kratos' eyes, Yuan waved down the protests. "Yes, yes, I'm being nosy again. I'm going back to the text."

The door to the office opened. Kratos didn't have to look to know it was Anna. Who else came into Yuan's office without knocking? Well, Botta occasionally, but Botta's steps were much heavier.

"Doria's saying something about that damned dog or whatnot eating her chickens." Anna said, striding up to the desk and leaning her palms on the back of the other chair.

They both looked at her at that. "Noishe listens to you." Yuan said. "Why not just tell him no?"

"Apparently, she wants to speak with all three of us this time."

"What is she, our mother?" Yuan muttered, but set the text down on the desk anyway before pushing his chair back to stand.

Anna tilted her head curiously, picking up the text. "What is this?"

"Some dwarven texts that I have been attempting to translate for awhile now. They're supposed to have some kind of information concerning Key Crests."

Anna frowned at him. "So what's that look for?"

"What look?"

"The look that says you're about to toss this in the fire if you have to have another go at it. Yeah, I know, it's a long description, but there's no real good acronym for it."

Kratos couldn't help the slight smile. "It's very frustrating."

"Are you not good with dwarven?"  
"That's not the worst of it."

"What is?"  
"The fact the text keeps shifting."  
Anna stared at him as though he'd just told her the sky was green. "What on earth are you talking about?"  
"Can't you see it?" Yuan asked from the door.

"The only thing I see on this page is some dwarven letters. Nothing's moving."

Both of the seraphim are instantly beside her. "You're not wrong." Yuan says.

"Of course I'm not. I know what I see when I see it."

Yuan plucked the paper from her hands and nearly became dizzy with the sudden whirling of the runes on the page. Anna peered over his shoulder. "So that's what you were talking about."  
"Hold it again." Kratos said.

Puzzled, Anna did so. The letters returned to their original places. "Do the dwarves not like men or something?"

At that, Yuan and Kratos laughed outright. "No…somehow, I doubt that the dwarves were terribly sexist."

"I think that it has to do with the fact that you can't do magic."

"Which would explain your question as to how it gains the mana." Kratos pointed out. "If it only activates when someone with magic in their blood holds it—"

"Then the magic itself would charge it, slowly draining the holder in case they were thieves. But clearly, it can't hold a charge."

"Which means that whatever is written here is something that is of use only to magicians."

"Or a process that involves magic." Yuan added.

Anna raised her eyebrows at both of the men. "I'm glad you all had an academic epiphany, but would you mind sharing in normal-people-speak?"  
"The dwarves put a spell—most likely in the parchment," Yuan looked pointedly at Kratos, "So that it drains the mana of the holder to activate the scrambling."

"But wouldn't the dwarves be drained whenever they tried to look at it?"

"Their magic is a different one, a much more subtle one compared the 'bursts and bangs' of the elves." Kratos told her.

"You hear that directly from a dwarf?"

"Centuries back, but yes."

The next thing they know, Noishe is barreling into the room, dashing past Anna and Yuan to curl around Kratos' legs. The three of them sighed in unison.

"What've you done now?"

Noishe just whined. Anna spotted the telltale specks of blood around his mouth and knew that he'd been at Doria's chickens again, or possibly one of her few sheep that they'd bought in Triet. Yuan grinned at Kratos. "Well, you can't possibly say that he doesn't still have the hunter's instinct."

"Then you can go explain that to Doria."

"I never pictured you as a sellout, Kratos."  
"You really should know me better."

Anna's cough sounded suspiciously like a laugh. "Don't worry, Yuan. Doria wanted to see all of us. We'll be right there the whole time. Silent supporters and all that."

Yuan glared sourly at her. He didn't particularly enjoy being lectured and certainly not by Doria, who seemed to make herself ten times bigger the more she lectured.

And lecture she does. Kratos and Anna are leaning against the counter, letting all of Doria's words go in one ear and out the other, as they're sure Yuan is. Kratos hesitates for a moment before letting his arm rest around Anna's hips. At first, it feels a bit strange to Anna. This relationship between them is still new and they're still not entirely comfortable with that closeness, but then again, neither of them was complaining either.

-/-/-/-

"I need your help."

Anna's sure that that can't be a sentence that Kratos likes, or has to, say often. "With?"  
"The dwarven texts. They don't become scrambled when someone without magic in their blood holds it. I think you're about the only person on the base that meets that description."

"You do realize that I can barely read common, right? There's no way I could translate dwarven."

"I'm not asking you to. I'm simply asking you to hold it while I translate it."

Anna stretched, joints cracking from where she'd been sitting at the console for the past hour. "So when do we start?"

-/-/-/-

"Heard you were wanting to see me." Yuan said, leaning on the doorframe.

Yggdrasill didn't turn away from whatever it was that he was working on at the desk. "You heard correctly. I was curious to know if you'd heard anything of Kratos since you were last here?"  
Yuan pretended to think. "Not that I can think of. Why, has something happened?"

"He's with that woman."

Yuan doesn't show his surprise that Yggdrasill isn't calling Anna an 'it' like nearly all of Cruxis is prone to doing. He wonders if this is a sign that the madness might be taking a turn for the better. "There's thousands of women in the worlds. You're going to have to be a bit more specific."

"The Angelus Project."

"Has he really betrayed us this time? Or did he frame Kvar?"

Yggdrasill set down the pen. "I believe that Kvar truly did betray us before and Kratos took advantage of the confusion. Whether he is involved with the rebel organization, I do not know."

"The rebels are intelligent. They're proving very difficult to track down, though I did find out that they have a name for themselves. They call themselves the Renegades."

"Renegades…an interesting title. You haven't found out anything else about them?"

"The only reason anyone's heard of them is word of mouth. By the time I get to wherever they've been, they're gone."

"And you can't track them?"

"For a time, I can. Then their trail seems to disappear. It's damn frustrating."

"I'm sure. And no sign that Kratos could be with them?"

Yuan shook his head as he poured himself a glass of wine from the bottle sitting at the corner of the desk. "Not a one. What's this about his being with the Angelus Project?"

"I believe he cares for her."

Yuan didn't have to pretend to nearly choke on his wine. How had Yggdrasill managed to get that good a look at Kratos and Anna's relationship? Had it been the torture? Yuan has no doubt that Yggdrasill is an effective torturer. _(I saw her dead…I saw her in Derris-Kharlan and she was dying…)_ But surely Kratos hadn't been broken that far?

"You're certain we're speaking of the same Kratos?"

Yggdrasill's lips twitched. "Yes, I'm certain. She managed to get here."

"How did a human get up to Derris-Kharlan?"

"An excellent question. She got up here and told me off."

Yuan knew about all this, but it never got less funny. "Seriously? She's either very brave or very foolish." Yuan was certain that it was the former.

"I'm not entirely which one it is either." Hearing this, Yuan wonders if he's finally gone 'round the bend as well. "I wouldn't think that Kratos would care for someone that was a fool."

Yuan took a sip of wine. It was a little too sour for his tastes, but then again, he'd never had very much appreciation for wine. "...No, I suppose he wouldn't. Is that why you let him live?"

"What?"

"I'm assuming that he came to rescue her and since I would have heard if Kratos was dead, why did you let him go?"

Yggdrasill didn't look at him. "Curiosity."

Yuan stared at him. He's sure that while he was looking at Yggdrasill's body, he was seeing some of Mithos peeking out. "Curiosity about…what, specifically?"

"I saw something I had not seen in many years, alright?" Yggdrasill snapped. Now Yuan is sure that this is Mithos and he berates himself because he and Kratos hadn't been the only ones to have lived through a lonely four thousand years. It must have been even lonelier for him, as he hadn't been with Yuan or Kratos for much of the time.

"And that was…?" Yuan prodded.

"If I could put a name to it, I would."

"When was the last time you saw it?"

"…Four thousand years ago."

Yuan doesn't know anything that Mithos could have seen then that he saw in Kratos now. But then, things were different through the eyes of war-children. Yuan had been born during the war, same as Kratos, Martel and Mithos, but the war had seemed far away, especially when compared to Mithos and Martel, whose hometown had been destroyed during a human raid, who had been closer to the front lines of the war since nearly birth.

"…I see."

-/-/-/-

Yuan searches for it. He does. He watches and observes Kratos and Anna carefully, looking for the spark of something painfully familiar. But nothing. They looked the same as they always had.

"Is there a reason you've been staring at us?" Kratos asks from the table. They're seated right beside each other, Anna holding the text out so that Kratos could copy the dwarven writing.

"No." Anna looked over and gave him a disbelieving look. Yuan should have known that he wouldn't be able to keep it from either of them. Kratos, simply because it was Kratos and Anna…she was surprisingly perceptive of people. Most of the time, anyway. "Something someone said had me thinking is all."

Kratos glanced up at him before looking back at the text. Having not mentioned a name, Kratos knows immediately of whom Yuan speaks. "Oh really? What about?"

"Before." Yuan says simply.

Kratos doesn't ask any more questions and, though Anna wants to, she senses this is another _personal _thing between them. She lets go of the pages with one hand for a moment, twisting her stiff wrist and cracking her knuckles. As she does the same with the other hand, Anna realizes that she keeps the same kind of time they do. Before were the years before Kratos had found her in the Asgard Ranch.

She isn't sure when, exactly, Before started for them, though something tells her that it was when Martel died.

It's only once dinner is called that Anna finally puts the book down. As much as she wants to find out more about the Cruxis Crystal growing inside her_ (Sometimes, Anna thinks she can feel it growing and it always gives her the shivers)_ her hunger is rapidly winning out.

"You need to eat too." She tells him, tugging the pen from his hands. "Come on."

"You're hungry already?"

Anna leans a hand on the table, looking down at him. It's a strange thing to be taller than him, and even now, it isn't that much of a difference despite the fact that she's standing and he's still sitting. "Kratos, take a look at the clock for me."

Kratos looks confused for a moment, but he obliges. "Is that really the time?"

Anna smiled. "Yes, it is."

"I'm sorry…I've kept you too long."  
Anna sputtered a laugh. "'Kept me?' I agreed to this. Come on, let's eat and then you can teach me dwarven when we're doing this all over again tomorrow."

Kratos had been in the process of getting up when he fully understands what she says. "What?"

"It looks interesting. And this way, I don't have to sit there and stare at symbols I don't understand while you translate." Anna grinned at him. "C'mon, teach. I'll even get you an apple."

Kratos wants to laugh. It's such an Anna answer. "You have a deal."

Anna's arm slips through his as they walk. "So…where exactly did you learn dwarven from? I don't think there's a class at some university you could've taken."

"There wasn't. During the war, there were dwarves living in the mountains that we were stationed between during a very cold winter and part of spring. We learned by necessity."

"That explains the speaking, but the writing?"

"Surprisingly, dwarves are very literature-based people. Not quite so much as the elves and they tend to put their works on walls and pillars rather than paper, but they still do it."

Anna was quiet for a moment, imagining great stone pillars with stories etched into them that held up entire mountains. "…What was Martel like?"

Kratos tried to bridge the mental jump that Anna had made and found that he couldn't. How women made those jumps, he truly would never know. "Where did this come from?"

"She fought in the war with you and Yuan right?"  
"Right."

"I try to picture her, but I can't. All I've ever heard of Martel, before meeting you and Yuan obviously, is that she was some goddess. And even now, I hear very little about her. My curiosity got the best of me."  
"As it tends to do." Kratos said while trying to think. How to describe a woman like Martel… "She was…lovely. Very passionate about her beliefs and she cared about every creature that swam, flew or walked, whether it was on two legs or four. You would have gotten along with her, I think."

"Incredible. A woman I can actually get along with."

Kratos had noticed that. Most of the women in the ranch, other than Doria who got along with everyone (Except for Noishe and Yuan, much of the time) Anna often argued with them. And it wasn't the friendly arguing of people close to you. And yet, with the men at the base, Anna was always at ease with them, laughing, working, joking and playing cards with the best of them. She was simply one of those women that was more comfortable with men than women.

-/-/-/-

It's when they're seated for dinner that Yuan gets his answer. Or a part of it, he thinks. He's seated across from Kratos and Anna at the dining table. Anna was speaking to Botta beside her. Yuan isn't sure that Botta ever speaks so much except when he's conversing with Anna. She does that to people, makes them at ease and comfortable with things they wouldn't usually be comfortable with.

Kratos is beside her, politely listening to the woman next to him. Yuan doesn't know her name—she's newer and is usually one of the one's helping take care of the kids. Yuan isn't sure how Kratos finds the patience for listening to her—he's doing his best to block her out, actually—but Kratos had always had the patience for that kind of thing.

But even as they're speaking and focused on other things, they're switching foods. Kratos is scraping the asparagus off of Anna's plate and Anna is spooning up his mashed potatoes. Yuan remembers that, often, in the military, they'd be eating some form of potatoes. They didn't spoil quickly and were very versatile. Frankly, they'd gotten sick of potatoes for the next several centuries. Even now, Yuan and Kratos preferred not to eat too many potatoes.

But it wasn't the fact that they were trading food that Yuan found different. It happened at almost every meal when someone didn't like something on their plate. There was always someone else willing to eat it. It was how very natural the actions looked and how very comfortable they were with each other at times like this.

Yuan does catch sight of Alijah sitting a good few seats away from Kratos and Anna both. Yuan is sure that Alijah had no intention of accidentally sparking off either of their tempers. Kratos was much more difficult to get angry—truly angry at least because that day in Triet, Kratos had merely been protective—than Anna, but even their annoyance could be vicious.

Yuan is startled from his thoughts by a basket of bread being passed to him. He takes a roll and passes it to the person beside him, already knowing what Kratos was going to say.

"You're overworking yourself."

Such a curse, being right all the time. Anna grinned as she spread butter over a half of her roll. "Maybe we should get you a bubble bath."

Beside her, Botta choked into his glass of water, making Anna chuckle. Sometimes, Botta wondered about how, exactly, Anna got the information she did, but then he remembered that she was close with both seraphim along with the fact that she had a knack for weeding answers out of people and he no longer wonders.

Yuan shakes his head at her. "You are determined to never let that go, are you?"

"Nope."

-/-/-/-

Yuan isn't surprised to find Kratos pouring over the dwarven texts that he'd copied when he is doing one of his midnight wanderings. As Yuan can't sleep and he didn't feel particularly tired enough to rest most nights, he takes to walking through the halls of the base and sometimes even flying in the night to relieve his boredom.

"And I'm the one overworking myself?" Yuan plucked one of the sheets from Kratos' hands. "How's it going?"

"The translating is slow, but smoothly. The dwarves don't like writing everything in twisting riddles as the elves do."

"You say that as if it's a bad thing." Yuan studied the page, seeing Kratos' familiar handwriting filling the side margins with notes. "You enjoy a good riddle as much as I do."

"Not when I'm attempting to translate."

"The process to make a Key Crest is complicated." Yuan said as he skimmed over the translated bits. "And this isn't even all of it."

"Luckily, it isn't difficult. Simply complex. If we can get the right tools, we might be able to do it ourselves."

Yuan snorted. "Somehow, I doubt it would be _that _simple. We're actually going to have to track this dwarf down for help."  
"Any leads on finding him?"

"A few. He's very good at diversion and covering his tracks. The few leads we have go in entirely opposite directions." Yuan set the paper back down on the table. "I think I'll take Noishe next time, see if he's any help."

"You must be getting desperate if you're taking Noishe."

"Hey, I've always gotten along wonderfully with him."

Kratos shook his head. "If you say so."

"You say that as if I'm crazy."

"You are."

"Not for that reason."

"What did Yggdrasill say to you that got you thinking so much today?"

Yuan doesn't bother lying. "Says he saw something that he hadn't seen in four thousand years and that's why he let you and Anna go."

"Did he tell you what it was?"

"If that was the case, I wouldn't have given myself a headache trying to figure it out."

"So what's your theory?"

"Why do you assume that I have a theory about everything? I couldn't have simply given up?"

"I didn't think those words were in your vocabulary." It's a partial lie. Yuan had given up, temporarily, just after Martel died, but he'd gotten back on his feet quickly enough. He had distracted himself with as many tasks as possible, running himself into the ground with the workload. Kratos thinks sometimes that Yuan became so accustomed that lifestyle that he still slipped back into it when under stress.

Yuan let himself fall into the chair across from him, his right hand absentmindedly playing with the ring on his left. Kratos remembers him doing that for days after he first proposed to Martel, as if he couldn't really believe that the ring was there. "…My theory? I think it's a relationship."

Kratos frowned at him. "You're going to have to elaborate."

"I forget that things like this have to be spelled out with intricate diagrams for you." Yuan grins briefly at the look on Kratos' face before continuing. "A relationship. Like Martel and I. You and Anna."

"We weren't together when he saw us."

Yuan made a disbelieving noise. "Not officially. Everyone else knew it except you two. I think that he hadn't seen something like that in so long that it actually shocked and confused him and now he wants answers."

"An interesting theory."

"I thought so.


	25. Chapter 25

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **SeaWorld was awesome, as always. My brother is letting me borrow the first season of Lost. So far, not so bad. I can't remember anyone's names other than Sawyer, so I get made fun of for the nicknames that I give them. It's not my fault that one of them was a hobbit.

Just got through reading the new Artemis Fowl. Fantastic as always, though it felt considerably shorter. Maybe it's just because I've gotten myself in the habit of reading Lord of the Rings over the past year. Gonna start working on the new Percy Jackson (even if it's not actually Percy Jackson)

-/-/ 

"_The inspiration of a noble cause involving human interests wide and far enables men to do things that they did not dream themselves of doing, and which they were not capable of alone. The consciousness of belonging, vitally, to something beyond individuality; of being part of a personality that reaches we know not where in space and time, greatens the heart to the limits of the soul's ideal."_

_-Maj. Gen. Joshua L. Chamberlain_

-/-/

"Sir! They've found something!"

Yuan looked up at Alijah. "And what might that be?"

"They think they've found the dwarf."

Yuan is on his feet immediately. "Where?"  
Alijah glanced back down at the hastily written copy of what had been on the screen. "In the mountains surrounding Hima and the Tower."

"Hiding right in front of their noses. Should've guessed." Yuan muttered. "Have you found a specific location yet?"

"No sir."

"Who's there now?"

"Botta and some of his team. They just sent the message in."

"Alright. Tell Kratos of any future updates and tell them I'm on my way."

"Yessir."

-/-/-/-

"The mountains surrounding Hima?" Anna repeats when Kratos tells her. "There are hundreds of mountains in that region."

"It's a miracle they've narrowed it down that far and they'll be fortunate if they can find the dwarf's living quarters. They're very secretive about that sort of thing."

"Can't blame them." Anna said, hefting the sword. Since she'd gotten strong enough, Kratos had slowly been teaching her how to use a sword properly. Not that she was much good at it, but she still wanted to learn. "Look what's happened aboveground." Anna paused with a new thought. "Would Yggdrasill put dwarves who wouldn't join him in the ranches too?"

"I don't know." Kratos answered honestly. "There were very few dwarves that didn't agree with him."

"I thought that dwarves and elves didn't get along. Why would they be working for an Age of Half-Elves?"

"Because they've been just as oppressed over the centuries as the half-elves. They want a chance at their own freedom, even if it took them centuries. They live almost as long as elves. They've learned patience."

"Didn't the dwarves have a land of their own?" Anna asked as she began her form. She does it slow, sure to make sure she does it properly. Kratos had told her numerous times that it was better to know a few moves very well rather than know many only slightly.

"Four thousand years ago, they did. But even then, the lands were scarce and ravaged by the wars. They weren't participants in the war, but they were affected nonetheless."

"Didn't you say you were stationed in an area near there?"

"We were, but the dwarves were very careful not to do anything to outwardly help the army."

"Why were you there?"

"The humans were trying to bottleneck our platoon, force down our rations and weed us out in general."

"Didn't work, I take it?"

"It almost did. The winter would have killed us had it not been for the dwarves."

"Guess I should be extra thankful for them then. I wouldn't have met you otherwise."

Anna thinks it's strange that she finds she can't imagine life without Kratos. She remembers what it was like, Before. The dark, cramped, damp cell, the countless experiments, the beatings. But that wasn't life. That was an existence, and barely one at that.

Kratos tells her to stop and adjusts the angle of her shoulders and shifts her legs so that they're planted a bit more firmly. They don't talk often during training. Their communication is almost entirely by touch. This is the only place that they've never felt awkward with each other, not once.

It's as they're finishing up that Hassan is jogging out to them. He'd shot up over the past year so that he was a good head taller than Anna, though he's still all gangly limbs and clumsy steps. "Yuan sent a message. Said he wants both of you, and about a dozen of us, over in the Hima mountains as quickly as possible."

Anna looks quizzically at Kratos. "Shall I prep the Rheairds then?"

Kratos nodded.

-/-/-/-

There aren't any mines in this part of the country, oddly enough. But there are caves. Many of them. The person waiting for them is Jayson, who'd grown up in the Meltokio slums. Anna had had guard duty with him a few times and found him fairly likeable. A little flirty, but likeable. He never meant the flirting anyway and he'd stopped almost entirely since he heard about her getting together with Kratos.

Jayson smiled at them. He'd cut his sandy blonde hair short since joining the Renegades and it made him look older. "Took you guys long enough."  
"It took us less than an hour." Anna said.

"Yeah, to get here. It'll take another hour to get to the cave."

"Does it go that deep?"  
"Oh yeah. There are miles and miles of caves down here. Yuan says its abandoned dwarf territory."

It takes Kratos a moment to make quick calculations, piecing together the separate worlds of Tethe'alla and Sylvarant. "He's right. One of their greatest cities was in this area. Garinval, the center of dwarven art."  
"It shows." Jayson said, nodding to the walls around them. The flickering light of his lantern illuminates the etched designs.

Anna has learned very little dwarven, little more than their alphabet, and she can't piece the story on the walls together, so she tries with the images. She can only suppose that this is their history, their legends and she thinks that she'd like to learn more about these people.

They lose track of time as they go deeper into the caves. The long tunnels are perfectly symmetrical, the corner sharp and Jayson sometimes has to duck, being a good foot taller than Kratos.

They reach a large central cavern, with openings near the very top of the roof. The cavern is constructed in such a way that there is no need for lanterns, sunlight and moonlight angling inside.

Yuan looks up as he hears them approaching. "Good, you're here."

"What's happened?" Kratos asks.

"These caves extend as far south as Asgard. If Dirk is here, we need someone else who speaks dwarven and the tracking party didn't have enough manpower to be effective."  
Anna leans forward to really see the map that Yuan's got spread out on a boulder. The map is yellowed with archaic script written in fading ink. "So here we are." She says, putting her finger on what she could only assume was the cavern they were in. "How far have we searched?"

Yuan takes a charcoal pencil and carefully shades in areas which are several miles down the tunnels branching out. "The problem is that the dwarves not only like to build out, they like to build up."

Anna looks up and sees that he's not wrong. The buildings are similar to the way Asgard had its buildings inside the cavern walls themselves. "Holy…how long did it take them to do all this?"

Yuan smiles slightly. "Centuries upon centuries."

Anna watches the two seraphim calculatingly. Centuries upon centuries, he said. Yet the dwarves had disappeared from the ground world for time immemorial. Had the dwarven cities already been this grand when Kratos and Yuan were children?

Kratos follows her eyes. He wonders if it's possible to feel slightly claustrophobic and too out in the open at the same time. "Has anyone searched up there?"

"Some of it. Some parts of it have caved in a little, or have crumbled to the point where we can't cross them." Yuan would have crossed those sections himself—large gaping holes in solid staircases were no challenge for one with wings—but he had sensed no living mana up there. But then, the flow of mana was different in dwarves than in humans or even elves.

At first, Kratos doesn't know what kind of damage could do things like that to dwarven architecture, but then he remembers that the worlds had been whole the last time he'd visited the dwarven cities. The splitting of the worlds had caused a great deal of damage to the geography.

Botta's voice comes out scratchy over one of the portable radios. "Sir, the north corridor is clear so far. We're about three miles in."

"Start heading back then." Yuan replied, glancing up. The construction of the cavern roof made it difficult to guess the time, but the pale moonlight and the absence of sounds from outside was enough. "We can continue tomorrow."

"Yessir."

-/-/-/-

By the time the others were awake, Anna had already been up for, roughly, two hours. Even as vast as this cavern was—their base could easily fit inside several times over—Anna didn't like the feeling of the high ceiling and the windowless walls. She knew she was free, that no Desians were likely to find this place, but echoes of her memories _(nightmares)_ of the ranch still came to mind.

When she'd woken, the cavern had been lit by pale blue and purple glowing. It had taken a moment or two for her sleep-blurred eyes to focus on the source. She knows the blue almost as instantly as she recognizes it. While Kratos' wings weren't a familiar sight by any means, they were unmistakable. It takes her a moment longer to realize that the pale purple is the glow of Yuan's wings. She'd only seen them once, when they had told her the truth about Cruxis.

They both hear her breathing quicken, hear her steps echo as she crossed to the stairs that curved upward. She doesn't say anything for a while. She simple observes.

Where Kratos' grace in the air seemed like the one that training and discipline gave you, Yuan's made it seem like he belonged there. They don't speak out loud to each other—or if they do, Anna can't hear it—but rather they use gestures and expressions. Anna wonders sometimes if they communicated like that simply because they'd been friends for so long or if they'd always been like that, instantly clicking.

"Find anything?" Anna asks once they touch down. She'd found some salted jerky that she was chewing on. Being in this cavern was making her appetite go, but only a bit. She's sure that after a day of searching and digging that she'd be plenty hungry.

"Nothing so far." Kratos sat beside her, smiling his good morning to her.

Anna hummed in thought as she looked around. She couldn't see details—the lighting was too dim for that—but she asked, "The dwarves are skilled craftsmen and architects. Couldn't they make hidden passageways in case of an emergency?"

"I sense a problem with this plan of yours." Yuan tells her.

"And what's that?"  
"If they did make hidden passageways, how, exactly, do you expect to find them?"

Anna thought about it for a minute. Her knowledge of technology and magic was fairly limited—as far as Renegade standards went. Compared to commonfolk, on Tethe'alla and Sylvarant both, she was a genius with it—but she'd been told she was imaginative before. "That see-through thing."  
Yuan and Kratos both frowned at her in confusion. "What?"

She turned to Yuan. "You used it on me to see the Cruxis Crystal. You saw my insides."

"_Oh_. That's called an X-ray."

It was Anna's turn to frown. "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why's it called that?"

Yuan turned to Kratos. "Well, Mr. Wealth-of-Useless-Information?"

"That's way too long. You need to shorten it." Anna told him.

"But it's true. Seriously, ask him how many different sounds a cat makes. He has an answer."

"Over a hundred where dogs can only make around ten." Kratos said absentmindedly. "And I've no idea why it's called an X-ray."  
"See? Useless information." Yuan said, gesturing at Kratos. "But we're straying from the point. You saw that machine. It's the size of both of my hands put together." Yuan put his hands together to demonstrate. "It can only x-ray that small an area. It's impractically small."

"No way to make it bigger, I suppose?"

"With the technology we have with us, not soon enough. We're going to have to look through this the old-fashioned way."

Anna smiled at him. "You two must be masters of the old-fashioned way."  
Yuan is caught between arguing and laughing. Anna usually affected him like that. He just shakes his head in the end.

The others slowly wake. After munching on the meager breakfast, they split up into teams to take each hallway. Four branch out from the cavern, not counting the several staircases that make their way up into the buildings that are part of the walls themselves.

They each took flashlights and a canteen full of water. The air down here is too still, almost suffocatingly so. And most of them are unaccustomed to steps and sounds echoing off the walls, so they jump often.

Anna's team is going down one of the tunnels already partially explored. It means about an hour of walking with little to do but look around at the detailed, blocky carvings on the walls. It didn't take long for Jayson, also on her team, began whistling.

The tune sounded familiar, like one of the tunes given to schoolchildren to help remember their lessons, but something sounded off about it. "What're you whistling?" Anna finally asks.

"It's an old song from the slums. We sing it while we work." Jayson smiles sheepishly. "It's annoying, isn't it?"

Anna shook her head. "It's not. It just sounded familiar."

Jayson looked her over. It wasn't the kind of lingering looks men gave women, but just one of a neutral observer. "You're not from the slums."

She smiled. "I'm not even from Tethe'alla."  
He returned the smile easily. "It shows. Tethe'allan women are usually more…proper."

"Proper?"

"Oh yeah. My sister thought you all were kind of backwards when we came here actually."  
"I didn't know you had a sister."

Jayson stuffs a hand in his pocket, the other playing with the flashlight. "There's a lot you don't know about me. Her name's Shera."

Anna tries to remember if she knew any Renegade named Shera, but she doesn't spend all that much time with the other women. "Does she look like you?"

"A bit. She's much prettier than me though." Jayson grinned. "I know, hard to believe."

Anna laughed. He was easy to be around and she didn't have to worry about something like what had happened with Alijah happening again. Jayson had told her in no uncertain terms that he was not willing to go against Kratos for her. And, he'd added winking, as pretty as she was, there were some men on the base that were better looking. "Yeah, you're not egotistical."

"Of course I am."

Anna was about to retort when she caught sight of something out of the corner of her eye. "Hey, hold on guys!"

Everyone turned back to her. Meredith—call me Merry—was the one who asked what she'd seen. Merry was a tall woman with red-brown curly hair and a strong country accent. "

"I think there might be a side path here." Anna said, carefully looking into the small opening. Something was striking her as wrong about it, but she couldn't put her finger on it.

The others gathered around. "It might be one, but none of us can fit."

Anna looked around. Merry was very tall for a woman and the men were all too broad in the shoulder and tall on top of it. "I could probably fit."

"Probably?"

Anna shrugged. "If I don't fit, then I don't. We can either open it up a little wider or leave it alone and keep going. It doesn't cost us anything to try."

"Go ahead. But be careful."  
Anna nodded and had to crouch to get in. It was a tight squeeze—meant for dwarves, Anna thinks, but then, she doesn't know exactly how tall a dwarf was—and Anna felt a little claustrophobic. The smell of rich earth was strong here, one that Anna wasn't really accustomed to and yet she found it comforting. Anything was better than a mechanical smell.

Anna froze as she saw trickles of dirt coming from the ceiling. That couldn't be a good sign. She tried to go backwards, but she didn't have any room to turn around. So she held her flashlight in her mouth and began crawling forward as fast as she can.

-/-/-/-

"There's…been an accident." Jayson panted, looking right at Kratos.

Kratos doesn't need to hear more than that, understanding the look on Jayson's face. He sprinted out of the corridor, across the cavern. Vaguely, he can hear Yuan's familiar footsteps from another tunnel—he'd most likely heard either the trouble or heard Jayson's words; the caves had excellent acoustics—but he doesn't concern himself with that.

The first words out of his mouth when he gets to where Merry and the others are "What happened?"

"Anna found something that looked like a side tunnel. She was the only one that could fit through it, so she tried to get through. The tunnel caved."

"No word from her?"

Merry shook her head. Kratos listens carefully, blocking out the sound everyone's breathing, of the footsteps and of his own pounding heart. Then, very faintly, he heard a familiar voice.

"I know one of you can hear me, dammit!"

Kratos chuckles slightly, relieved. Anna wasn't so injured that she couldn't yell. But she couldn't hear them in return. "Come on. We have to open the tunnel back up again. Start an assembly line with the rocks and put them on the far side of the hall."

There was no question of obedience. It was slow, hard work, passing large rocks to each other to stack against the wall. Kratos and Yuan had to be careful. Oftentimes, they unconsciously used their superior strength to lift some rocks which the others couldn't hold once it was passed.

"There's a hole." Kratos reported before crouching. The tunnel had opened both wider and higher with the collapse and while it was still a tight fit, Kratos could at least get in. "Anna?"

"I'm alive." She called back. "But my arm's pinned."

"We'll get you out." He promised.

Anna laughed a little breathlessly. She knew that much already. Her arm was definitely dislocated, probably broken and it was damn _painful_.

True to his word, about half an hour later, Kratos' familiar face wasn't far above hers. She grinned a little weakly at him. "Took you long enough."

Kratos shook his head. Arm broken and half buried in heavy dirt and Anna was ever the smartass. Kratos had to maneuver himself a little awkwardly to get to the rock pinning her arm, but he managed it. As soon as he lifted it, Anna tried to move her arm out of the way, but her arm didn't feel like listening and her legs were stuck under dirt. She shimmied her body away from the rock as much as she could, but there wasn't much she could do in such a tight space.

"I'm going to have to put this back down for this to work." Kratos warned her. He didn't want to cause any excess pain, but it was necessary.

Anna gritted her teeth and nodded. Kratos set it down as gently as he could, but Anna still flinched. Kratos closed his eyes and focused, remembering his teachings. Mana was a part of everything and magic was the art of controlling mana. He knew that that was how the half-elves had begun making their bombs during the war. They'd create balls of clay and concentrate the mana inside them before throwing them to set them off. But he couldn't do that here. An explosion would only cause another collapse.

But he could use the idea. Science stated that everything was made of particles and if he could make every particle explode individually, then the rock would turn to dust without any damage to the tunnel or Anna.

Anna braces herself when she feels a shift in the air. She isn't sure what that shift was and she doesn't know what, exactly, she was bracing herself for, but the rock turning to dust right before her eyes was not it. The dust is uncomfortably cool against her skin and Kratos quickly uncovers her legs from the pile of dirt holding them down.

Anna carefully gets to her feet, her injured left arm hanging too loose in its socket, but otherwise, she was mostly alright. Kratos watches her carefully for any other signs of injury and when he didn't find anything more serious than a few scratches and a bruise, he kisses her on impulse out of relief.

Anna smiles into the kiss. "Not that I'm not loving this, but I'd like it more if it wasn't happening in a tiny tunnel when I have a dislocated shoulder."

-/-/-/-

"I can still help." Anna said stubbornly. "That cave-in was a complete fluke. I can still help search. And if not, just heal my arm. I know you can."

Sometimes, Yuan regrets the fact that Anna knows him and Kratos so well. But Kratos was staying out of this one. His excuse? 'You're leader of the Renegades, not me. This is your decision.'

"I've told you before that if your body is healed too much by magic that it doesn't strengthen itself and eventually, it'll stop healing itself. You're going to have to keep that sling on for at least a week."

Anna snarls at him, but knows that she really doesn't have the upper hand in this argument. She grabs a lantern, lights it and strides out of the cavern. There hadn't been any turn-offs on the way in here, so she's fairly certain she won't get lost. She doesn't have to look to know that Kratos is three steps behind her, just in case.

"You think he's right?" She asked, not bother to raise her voice.

"Not entirely." Kratos replies carefully. "But he's not wrong about using magic to heal everything."

"Not everything. Just this damn shoulder of mine so I can help with the work."

Kratos wants to tell her that she doesn't always need to help, that she could take a break sometimes, but then he hears the something extra in her voice. She'd been out of the ranch for a year and some change. Some would say that that was long enough to forget, to move on. Kratos would say that those people were idiots. Memories like that of the ranch didn't just disappear or fade away. He knew that Anna had asked him to train her because she wanted the nightmares to go away. And perhaps it worked. But that wouldn't stop the memories from creeping on the edge of her thoughts during the day.

So he doesn't tell her about not always needing to help. He lengthens his stride to catch up with her. "I'm sure there'll be plenty of work you can do one-armed back at the base."

Anna grinned sideways at him. "Tryin' to get rid of me?"

Kratos kisses her lightly. They still weren't very comfortable with each other around other people, but when it was just them, they'd fallen into a strange sort of rhythm. He smiles at her. "Not a chance."

-/-/-/-

Anna has taken to lifting some weights that she'd borrowed from one of the men to help build her arm back up to full strength. Turned out that on top of dislocating it, she'd broken her forearm and wrist.

It's when Noishe, lying a few feet away by the door and being the ever-vigilant watchdog—Anna still wonders how she ever bought the story, even for a second, that he was a dog—that he raises his head and his ears prick up that she knows that everyone's home.

Anna still wonders how dwarves, being as small as they are, could build the things she's seen in those caverns. The dwarf hardly reaches her waist, but his dark brown eyes are intelligent, his face nearly hidden by a rather impressive beard.

"Yer the lass that everyone's been talkin' about? The one who broke 'er arm?"

Anna smiled, unable to help it. "My reputation precedes me."  
The dwarf looked slightly surprised, like it wasn't the answer he'd been expecting. He smiled and held out a hand. "Th' name's Dirk."

"Anna." She replied, shaking the offered hand.

Yuan draws Dirk into a different conversation and Anna feels more than sees Kratos come to stand beside her, close enough to almost but not quite touch. "Took you guys quite a while. Three weeks, not counting the rest of the time we were just trying to narrow it down."

"Dwarves are very good at catch me-find me." Kratos replied. He tried to study her injured arm without her noticing, but really, he should've known better.

"I'm _fine._" Anna insists. "It's a little sore and hurts if I twist wrong, but I'm okay."

Though she didn't protest when Kratos double-checked the arm for himself. "This healed very quickly." He said quietly.

Anna met his eyes. "It can't be the Cruxis Crystals, can it?"

"The entire point of the Exspheres was to enhance a warrior's skill to its full potential."

"And a Cruxis Crystal makes those skills incredible, like yours and Yuan's. Your senses are enhanced beyond belief. Does healing change too?"

"An Exsphere makes it easier for magic to affect the body, so it would make healing magics work easier, but that wouldn't explain it healing this much faster on its own."

"And I thought you said that the crystallization process was slowing down?"

"It was."

"…This is going to mean more tests, isn't it?"

"Hopefully, not as many. If the Key Crest doesn't have to be attached to the Crystal, then it'll stop the process almost entirely."

"Almost?"

"The Exsphere's evolution happens no matter what. But with a Key Crest, you can remove the Exsphere, can control it."

Anna smiled, hoping it looked a little braver than she felt at the moment. "Here's hoping my luck holds and it doesn't have to be attached."


	26. Chapter 26

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Less than a week until Thanksgiving Break (Jeez, already?) and three days until the new Harry Potter! I really hope I'm not the only one spazzing about it. :D

This and the next chapter are probably gonna be shortish. I've got relationships to develop and whatnot.

-/-/ 

_Babies are such a nice way to start people. ~Don Herrold_

-/-/

"Do we have a verdict?" Kratos asked the next morning when he came downstairs.

"As of yet, no. He knows he can make Key Crests, but whether he can attach them remotely is another matter." Yuan sipped at his coffee. He hadn't rested in nearly five days, not since they'd found the first traces of Dirk's presence in the caves.

"Does the technology not exist?"

"No, it exists. He's heard of it. But he was a child when Cruxis came recruiting. He'd gone exploring aboveground and when he came back, they were gone. He had already been apprenticed to a smith, but he hadn't had a chance to get into the truly complex arts yet."

"He told you all that?"

"Most of it. I'm great at connecting the dots."

"A slight understatement."

Yuan shrugged. "How's Anna?"

"How do you think? Acting like she didn't break and dislocate her arm."

"The arm looked a little too healthy yesterday or was my exhaustion simply playing tricks on me?"

"It wasn't." Kratos repeats him and Anna's conversation yesterday. At the end of it all, he asks, "You haven't figured out what it was that Kvar did to her, have you?"

"Considering he used a cocktail of drugs with a healthy dose of magic I've never even heard of before, no. Not completely."

"Would you say that Kvar and Pronyma get along rather well?" Kratos asks, cutting a slice of an apple.

Yuan looked at him. "I suppose. You think Pronyma helped him with the spells?"

"You said it yourself: it's magic you've never even heard of. What's the one kind of magic you and I have never even attempted?"

"The dark stuff that Pronyma likes to play with. One day, that's going to get her killed and I'm going to sit back and watch."

"You may not like her very much, but she seems rather…interested…in you."

Yuan read the look on Kratos' face. "No."

"You'd only have to steal some information from whatever notes she has. She's certain to have some."

"When Hell freezes over."

"I'll need to start investing in some ice skates then." Kratos knows Yuan too well. He knows Yuan loves Anna as well. Not the same way Kratos did, certainly, and it isn't quite familial either.

Yuan sighs. "This is going to cost you another cinnamon roll." He warns.

-/-/-/-

Derris-Kharlan feels…off somehow and it makes Yuan more than a little uneasy. The entire point of Derris-Kharlan was that it didn't change.

Yuan strides through the halls, unconcerned about the clear panes of walls and floors that come in measured intervals_ (Can't have it randomly because then things wouldn't be in order and Yggdrasill, even in his madness, needs order)_. Being this high in space, with nothing but tempered glass separating him from all that empty space was something that had never held any fear for him.

He can remember climbing the many stairs with his brother up the building that they'd lived in. They lived at the very bottom and they climbed up and up past their family—well, not blood-related, but they'd all known each other their entire lives. If that wasn't family, what was?—until they reached the very top of the building where laundry was washed and strung and they'd sit with their legs off the edge and stare up. Yuan remembers asking his brother what stars were. He knew what they were when he saw them, but he didn't know what they _were_. And his brother had thought about it for a minute before smiling and saying that they were golden hedgehogs in the sky that were curled up during the night and when they opened during the day, they made the day bright.

"Lord Yuan. What brings you here?"  
He looks at the woman. Instantly, he remembers going through her file when they were looking for candidates for Cardinals. Pronyma. No last name. Born in Ozette nearly five hundred years ago, during the time of the Purges. Ozette had begun a vendetta against half-elves. The results had been nothing less than a slaughter. It had gotten to the point where Kratos had had to come in—as an angel, which didn't happen all that often—and stop it. To this day, Ozette still held a slow simmering resentment for half-elves.

"If I might see you in your office?"

"Of course sir. What's this all about?"

Pronyma's office was very pale, much like the rest of Derris-Kharlan. There was none of Ozette's earthiness, none of the darkness of her magic. The only signs of anything other than white was the bookshelf behind her desk. Polished blackwood with the subtle colors of book covers.

"You've heard of the trouble with some of the ranches lately, haven't you?"

"The escapees? The breaches in security? I have indeed heard it, sir."

"As the leader of the Grand Cardinals, I thought I'd ask your opinion on how the other Cardinals are doing with their ranches. They seem to be under the impression that I'm not to be trusted."

"I don't see why." Pronyma said, taking a seat behind her desk and crossing her legs. "You're not the traitor that Lord Kratos is."

"So you've heard about that."

"Of course I have."

Yuan has a sarcastic comment that, had he been among people who would've appreciated it properly, he'd have said it. As it was… "You haven't answered my question."

"As to what I think of it all?" Pronyma took a report in hand. "From their reports, things are going more or less as normal."

Yuan was taking slow steps around the desk so that he could get a closer look at her books. "And from sources other than their reports?"

"You're a very astute man, Lord Yuan."

"It's why Lord Yggdrasill values me so highly." He says dismissively.  
"Are you aware of the rebellion in Sylvarant?"  
"I've heard some rumors. Nothing solid."

"They're true. The rebels have attacked the ranches. Nothing particularly big, but there's been stolen goods, prisoners freed, guards dead and technology destroyed."

Yuan runs a hand along the spines of the books. Some of them are tinged with magic and even that light touch sends shivers down his spine. There were some magics that people simply weren't supposed to know. But it told him where to look.

"That's quite a rebellion the Cardinals have allowed to slip under their noses."

Pronyma got to her feet. "And what, exactly, is that supposed to mean?"

"It's very simple, Lady. These rebels must have gotten their start somewhere, must have amassed resources and manpower. Such a movement is otherwise unheard of in Sylvarant. How did you let it advance as far as it has?"

"There was no trace of them! They are as ghosts.'

"No, Lady. They're not. Ghosts don't do that kind of damage." Yuan stepped away from the bookshelf. He'd found the titles he needed. Now it was simply a matter of finding out what was inside them, but that could be saved for a later time.

"And what, exactly, do you expect me to do about it? They come, destroy things and leave without a trace."

"I expect you to try." Yuan told her coldly. "These rebels mustn't be allowed to get any more powerful. Is that understood?"  
"Yes sir."

-/-/-/-

"Hey, pardon me?"

Anna looked towards the speaker. She was a young woman, couldn't be much older than Anna herself, with blonde curls and dark brown eyes. "Yeah?"

"I was wonderin' if you wouldn't mind helpin' me out with the nursery. Usually, it's me and two other ladies, but one's sick and the other—she was real good at blacksmithin'—is helpin' out the dwarf."

"Um…sure. Why not? I'm Anna." She said, smiling at her.

The girl returned the smile. "Shera."

"You're Jayson's sister?"

"Mmhmm. He told me about what happened to ya in the caves. You're real lucky."

"Didn't feel that way with a broken arm."

"I suppose not, but I was talkin' about havin' someone like Kratos with ya."

"You're one of the few people with that opinion."

"I know. I've heard the other girls talkin'. They don't trust him like they do Yuan."  
"It's because he's human on top of being an angel."

Shera appraised her. "You're smarter than a lot of people think you are."

"Ain't that always the case?" Anna said as they stepped into the nursery. She hadn't really been in here before. The few times she wasn't on the machines or with the metalsmithing, she was with the older kids, the teenagers. They were easier, if more confusing, being like adults one moment and the next, so very like children.

Anna wanders the nursery, looking at the babies in the cribs and watching the toddlers waddle across the room. She's startled when Shera comes up to her with an armful of baby. "Here." Shera tells her, giving the child to Anna.

Anna froze_ (What if she dropped him?)_. Shera sighed and repositioned Anna's hands in a better holding position before turning away.

"Where are you going?" Anna asked.

"You're acting like you've never held a baby before!"  
"I haven't."  
Shera stared at her oddly. "But there are babies everywhere."

"Yeah, but their mothers never ask me to hold them." The infant squirmed and Anna held him out to Shera to try and give him back.

"You've got to learn sometime. Don't clutch at him like that. I'm only going to find him a blanket. You'll be fine." Shera grinned. "It'll be great practice for when you and Kratos have kids."

"_What?"_

Shera laughed, high and sweet. "I'm joking."

"I hope so." Anna muttered, gently bouncing him as she'd seen women in town do. The baby started to cry and Anna cooed and rocked him, trying to calm him down. She looked wildly at the other woman. "Fix him."

Shera smiled. "He's prob'ly wet. Do you know how to change him?"

Anna gave the blonde a look. "If I didn't know how to hold him, what makes you think I know how to change him?"  
"True. I'll teach ya. Here, set him down on the table." Anna obeyed and Shera stood beside her. "Take the diaper he fouled and clean 'im with the edges. 'S not hard. Lift him by the ankles—don't worry, he's used to it. That's the idea. Put the dirty one aside." She went to get a clean cloth, dampening it a little in the sink they had. "Swab 'im down. You wouldn't feel much better if that were you, now would ya?" The baby squirmed and Shera gave him a finger to hold. "Easy there, fella."

"Where did you learn all this?" Anna asked as Shera gave her a fresh diaper.

"In the slums, everyone takes care of everyone, so all the kids that're too young to try an' find work hafta stay behind to take care of the babies. Fold it like a triangle. No no, not so loose. It'll fall off. There ya go, a good knot." Shera smiled down at the baby. "Yer all set."

"You'd make a good mother." Anna tells her. She's not sure why she does—it's not like Anna can remember what a good mother is or isn't.

"I think you would too."  
Anna snorted. "Right. Real funny."

"I was being serious."

Anna eyed her. "You sure you're not mentally unbalanced?"

"My brother certainly seems to think so sometimes."

"You two are close?"  
"Yeah…he practically raised me."

"I didn't think Jayson was that much older than you."

"Seven years. Dad left when we were kids and Mama got the sickness a couple years after I was born and…well."

A head of dark curls poked around the door. "Anna, Yuan says he wants to see you." He smiled at the other woman. "Hey, Shera."

"Nice to see you too, Hassan." Shera said.

Anna bid her goodbyes to Shera and followed Hassan out. The teenager looked a little restless. "Something wrong, Hassan?"  
"I just can't wait to get back to Dirk."

"He teaching you?"

"Sort of. He says to learn properly, I have to watch first. Watch and listen. It's a little boring." He confessed.

To Anna, it sounded like a very dwarf-like custom. They seemed like a patient people. "It's bound to get more interesting."

"If you say so." But the restlessness didn't leave him.

"Go ahead, Hassan. I can find Yuan. He's pretty noticeable."  
Hassan laughed before running towards the stairs and sliding down the banister, which was little more than a strip of metal with carefully smoothed edges so no one cut up their hands while holding on for balance.

It takes a bit more searching than she'd thought, but Anna finds Yuan in the infirmary. She wrinkles her nose as soon as she steps inside. The stench of medicine and disinfectant never seems to leave the room.

Yuan is sitting on a stool, flipping through a tome that gave Anna a bad feeling. "What's that for?"

He doesn't look at her. "Do you, by any chance, remember what spells they used on you in the ranch?"

"What?"

"Spells. They used them on you, along with drugs. Do you remember which ones they used?"

Anna shook her head. "I don't have a clue. I was usually drugged beforehand." Yuan scribbled a note in a file. "You didn't answer my question. What's this about?"

"I managed to steal some books from one of the Cardinal's offices this morning. From what I've been able to figure out, Kvar used a mixture of some of these spells along with the drugs on you."

"I thought you went to Derris-Kharlan two days ago."

"I did. I was able to find out which ones I needed, but I wasn't able to steal them at the time. That good a thief I am not."

"And what's that Cardinal going to do when they find out that their magic books have been stolen?"

"Most likely? Find someone to get revenge on."  
"It won't take them long to think of you."  
"They've no proof and that'll make all the difference."

Anna glanced down at the tome. The bad feeling hasn't gone away. "I remember hearing that magic leaves traces."

Yuan raised his hands, which Anna only now noticed had gloves. "Which is why I'm wearing these. It won't remove the traces entirely, but it'll help." Besides, Yuan hated the shivers the tome gave him when he touched it.

"Sorry I can't give you anything more specific."  
Yuan leaned against the counter. "It's not your fault." He paused before asking, "How's the arm?"

Anna held it out, knowing that Yuan wouldn't rest until he took a good look at it for himself. Not that Ravel wasn't a decent Healer, but Yuan liked to be sure of these things.

"You've been stressing it a little." He tells her.

"Would you rather I sit and do nothing?" Anna challenged.

The honest answer is 'yes' for the simple reason that he'd rather her not strain the still-healing arm, but he knows Anna well enough to not answer the question honestly.

She must have read the look on his face because she just shakes her head. "Never mind. Unless you need me for something else, I'm going to grab some lunch and head back to the nursery."  
Yuan frowned at her. "Nursery?"

"Yeah. Shera asked me for some help."

"And you're sure she's quite sane? Asking you for help with infants?"

Anna pushes him with her shoulder, nearly knocking him off balance. "Haha." But he wasn't wrong. It's not that Anna wasn't good with kids, but she didn't really know how to take care of any kid younger than, say, five or six.

Once Anna's downstairs, she makes herself a sandwich and, on a whim, makes herself another one before grabbing two tall mugs of tea and setting it all on a tray before going back up to the nursery.

"Brought you some lunch." Anna says to Shera. "Wasn't sure when you ate last, so…"

Shera smiled and they sat against the wall, eating their sandwiches and watching the infants crawl around curiously or wobble as they stood. It isn't quiet—how could it be with babies everywhere?—but it's comfortable and perhaps a little awkward at first.

-/-/-/-

"You forgot, didn't you?"

Kratos looks up at Doria from where he's up to his elbows in soap suds. He'd been volunteered to do the dishes while she swept and mopped. "Forgot what?"

"Exactly. Do you know what today is?"

Kratos had to think about it. Days blended together so easily sometimes. "May…fifteenth?"

"It's the seventeenth, actually, but close enough. Now tell me, what's your lady's birthday?"

At first, Kratos doesn't entirely understand the question. When he finally gets it, he replies, "April twenty-third." Now that Kratos thinks about it, how could he have forgotten her birthday?

When Doria sees the expression on his face, she gives a self-satisfied hum. "_Now_ he understands. Though to be fair, you weren't here then. You were in the mines. That's no excuse for forgetting once you got back."

"Are you done scolding, Lady?"

"I'm saying it so perhaps you won't forget next time. Now get out of here and wish her a happy late birthday." When Kratos only looks at her, slightly blank, she shoos him out. "Go on. I can take care of this on my own."

-/-/-/-

When Kratos comes into the laundry room—really, it's a bunch of washing machines with stairs up to the roof where long lines of clothes are stretched out. They could've used driers as well, like they did at the Flanoir base, but it had been a unanimous decision that Triet's heat was not something to be wasted—Anna smiles. He's always had that effect on her, but now, she was more aware of it and she wanted to be annoyed about it.

"What brings you all the way up here? Thought your laundry day wasn't until Thursday." Then she really takes a good look at him. His arms are soaked up to the elbow and suds are sticking to his skin. "And why do you look like you had a fight with a bubble bath and the bubbles won?"

"The latter is Doria's fault."

"Of course." Anna laughed, pulling out a shirt and starting up the stairs to set it to dry, Kratos following closely.

"I forgot your birthday."

Anna turns to stare at him, the wetness of the shirt slowly seeping into her arms. "What're you talking about?"

"Your birthday. I forgot it."

"Did you?"

Kratos couldn't help but smile. Trust Anna to forget her own birthday. "Yes, I did. It's May the seventeenth already, or so I'm told."

"It's not as if it's a big deal, Kratos." She says. "I don't even know how old I am anyway, so it's not like getting another year older matters much."

"It's not celebrating when you were born, but when you got out of the ranch." He reminds her.

She has to give him that one. "Well now, _that_ is worth celebrating."

"I don't have a present for you." He says.

Anna shrugs and smiles. "You know, you could just wish me a happy birthday."

Kratos chuckles and tugs her close gently. Dipping his head to kiss her, he murmurs a happy birthday against her lips.

-/-/-/-

"She made a belated birthday dinner." Yuan warns them as they're about to go into the kitchen for dinner. "Happy late birthday, by the way."

"A dinner?" They both say at the same time.

"Yup. I think she even managed to roast some duck."

"When…?" Kratos asked. He'd been helping her with the kitchen for much of the afternoon. How could she have done it without his noticing?"

"To be quite honest, I stopped questioning her methods, though I think magic has something to do with it. Oh, and I remembered something earlier." They both look at him quizzically. "I seem to recall something about the beach being mentioned for your last birthday. And something about a bikini. Maybe something yellow and polka-dotted?" He says, smirking.

Anna rolls her eyes. "I told you, I don't need a bathing suit."

"But you don't say no to the beach."

"Well who would?"  
"I would." "Yuan would." The seraphim say it at the same time.

"Oh yeah…you have an irrational fear of water."

"_Distaste."_ Yuan corrects._ "_I have a _distaste_ for water. And the both of you get the next couple of days off. Altamira's beginning to look like an actual resort now rather than the coffee pot before it's cleaned out. Looks real pretty. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to see if there's any of that fabled duck left."

"Do you like the beach, Kratos?" Anna asks.

"As you said, who doesn't? Other than Yuan."


	27. Chapter 27

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **

Been listening to Wicked, Trans-Siberian Orchestra and Tenacious D. while I write this. It's a really weird mix and it's been having an odd effect so far. Hopefully, this chapter (full of romance as it is) makes up for the first…twenty-odd chapters when they were beating the bush.

Harry Potter was _awesome_. I actually wanna see it again. I saw Megamind too. Loved it, Minion especially.

How is it that I get less done when I'm on break than when I'm working on school nights?

Headed to Miami for Thanksgiving to spend some time with the cousins. Hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving (for those that celebrate it).

-/-/ 

"_If I'm gonna wear a dress, I want one with some slink."_

"_You want a slinky dress? I can buy you a slinky dress. Captain, can I have money for a slinky dress?"_

"_I'll pitch in."_

"_I can hurt you."_

_-Zoe, Wash and Jayne__** (Firefly—Shindig)**_

-/-/

"Any advice from a Tethe'allan?" Anna asked Shera that night as she was helping put the infants to bed.

"I'd suggest a skirt at least. They're much more…I don't want to say proper, but there's really no better word for it that I know. Their ideas of what a woman should be are a bit more outdated."  
"Let me guess—women should stay at home. Cook, clean, care for the kids, listen to the man, the whole shebang?" Shera nodded. "Well, they're gonna get a kick out of me."

Shera laughed. "You're going to turn Meltokio on its side."

Anna shrugged. "I try." The infant in the crib began to whimper. "Oh, what did I do now? You're fed, you're changed and you're in bed. What more do you want?"

Shera came to stand beside her and took the blanket edges from beneath the child and wrapped it around him. "They like to be swathed in blankets. They like to be completely smothered like that. It's only later that people develop a need for freedom."

"It always seems like everyone knows more than me." Anna says, absently rocking the cradle.

"You ever think that's because your closest friends are four thousand year old angels?"

Anna smiled a little. "I'm used to them. I'm talking about everyone in general."

"Everyone teaches someone else something else." Shera says reasonably. "That's what mama used to say, anyway."

Anna opened her mouth to say something but was cut off by a tugging of her pant hem. She looked down and wasn't surprised to see Noishe, who whined and tugged once more before sitting back on his haunches.

Shera scratched Noishe's head before telling Anna, "Get to bed. You wouldn't wanna be tired on your days off."

-/-/-/-

Since they have a few days, Kratos and Anna agree that they should travel around Tethe'alla a bit before going to Altamira.

Meltokio is an incredible sight. Anna has never seen such tall buildings. Luin could fit inside Meltokio's shop district several times over. But the colors here are starker, bolder. Few, if any, of Sylvarant's subtle shades can be seen and if they are, it's in glimpses out of the peripheral vision, like a ghost.

"This city's _huge_." Anna said, absentmindedly playing an old children's game with the stones of the streets. 'Don't step on the white or you'll fall and give your mom a fright' was the chant. "How do people not get lost?"

"I suppose it would be simple enough to find your way if you grew up here."

Anna sees some women, and more than a few men, staring at her oddly. "Why're they looking at me like that?"

Kratos' arm curves around her waist, his hand settling itself comfortably on her hip. "A woman in breeches on a normal day? It's not a normal sight in Tethe'alla, especially in the city."

"Yeah, them and their outdated views." She muttered.

Kratos chuckled. "You do realize that Sylvarant would be in the exact same place if they'd flourished, right?"

"But it didn't."

They strolled through the gardens in the upper districts, stopping in the occasional shop to browse and quietly make fun of some of the more ridiculous objects. Porcelain cats and some creepy dolls that seem to follow them with their eyes as they walk through the room.

A rack of colorful things catches Anna's eye and she goes to investigate. "Where do people where things like this?" Anna asks aloud, running her hands down the smooth materials. They didn't have any kind of cloths like this in Sylvarant.

"Balls, parties, things like that."

"Balls, like in the fairy tales? They actually have them here?"

"Yes they do. And it never ceases to amaze me how women manage to breathe in a corset."

Anna has to agree. "I don't get it either."

"Are you two going to the celebration?" The shopkeeper asked. She was a young woman, couldn't be much older than Anna, but something about her eyes made her seem younger.

"What celebration?"

The shopkeeper looks at them oddly. "The princess's birthday celebration. The nobles are having a party, naturally, but everyone else is going to have a celebration out in the square. There'll be food and dancing."

Kratos watches Anna light up at the mention of food, but the shopkeeper mistakes it for excitement at the dancing.

"Well, you've got a muscular figure for a girl, but you still look real pretty. If you want my advice, you'll want…" Anna is dragged away by the shopkeeper and Kratos moves to lean back against the wall. He's sure that they're going to be awhile.

He wasn't wrong. After a half hour, Anna stumbles out of a dressing room wearing a dark green dress that shimmers into emerald if it hits the light properly as she walks. The dress ties around the back of her neck, with a string of silver beads sewed just beneath the bodice. It exposes the lean muscles of her arms and makes the slender line of her neck much more noticeable.

Kratos' eyes go a little wide at the sight. "Exactly how did she manage to get you into that?"

Anna smiles. She'd seen the look on her face. Even though she felt a little ridiculous, it was worth it for that look. "With lots of shimmying. She's convinced that we absolutely _have_ to go."

"Oh really?"

"Mmmhm."

"And are you absolutely opposed to going?"

"What?"

"The celebration. Are you opposed to going?"

Anna eyes him. "Why?"  
"Because if you weren't, I was going to ask if you would stoop to be on my arm tonight."

"…Will you wash it first?" Anna said, grinning a little.

Kratos couldn't help but let out a short laugh at that. Anna never ceased to surprise him. "If you insist."

"Then I'd be honored. I still have to wear a dress like this, don't I?"

"If it makes you feel any better, I have to wear a suit."

"Maybe so, but it's not that much of a change from what you usually wear." Anna did a little spin in front of the mirror, watching the full skirt swirl around her. "I'm picking another one."

"Is that one not comfortable?"

"A little itchy to be honest." Kratos should have guessed that her practicality would come back to play. She turned to him. "Any requests or suggestions?"  
"As long as you're alright with it."

-/-/-/-

"Hey, Kratos? Some help here?" She asks from behind the curtain to the dressing room.

He ducks inside. It's only really been an hour—most of it with the shopkeeper tittering on about what worked on Anna and what didn't—and he can hear the festivities starting up.

"Zip that for me?" Anna said, gesturing towards her back. "I've been trying for a while, but my arm is just not supposed to bend that way."

Kratos obliges, zipping her up in one smooth motion. This dress is bronze-colored and the only things holding it up are thin strips of cloth that fit snugly over her shoulders. Its hem brushes the skin just beneath her knees, which she's tried to tug a little lower, but it was all in vain.

Anna turns to him and was about to say something, but quickly changed her mind when she took a proper look at him. His sword is still at his hip—paranoid, him?—but the daggers he usually wore at his belt were gone. Then again, she can't complain that he had a weapon. She has a knife in her left boot, after all. He was dressed simply, with black breeches and a white shirt that had the first button undone, but that didn't change the fact that it was the nicest she'd ever seen him dress.

"You do clean up well, don't you?"

"What, you thought I wouldn't?"

"Well, you bein' such a down-to-earth person, I never really pictured it. Did you find the clothes in this shop?"

"It was a hassle trying to make the shopkeeper keep her hands to herself." Kratos muttered.

Anna snorts a laugh. "That's your own fault."

"I don't see how."

Anna only grins in that infuriating way that meant she was going to tell him. She tugs on her boots—the shopkeeper had tried to get her into a pair of strappy heels, but Anna had steadfastly refused. Dresses were one thing. Heels were another.—and says, "Did I tell you I swore off dresses?"

"When was this?"

"When we went to Asgard. I swear, that dress was going to be the death of me."

Kratos was very glad she'd broken her word. Anna looked lovely in a dress. But what he said was, "I doubt that. You're too stubborn to die by something so simple as a dress."

Anna laughs. "Shall we go then?"

She links her arm with his as they walk. While Meltokio was nice enough during the day, now at twilight when the lamps were being lit and the shadows lengthening, it seemed as though it were an ocean of light. It wasn't homey—nothing in Sylvarant had anything like this—but it was incredible.

As they step into the wide courtyard, the Coliseum looking much less imposing with darkness softening its edges, Anna feels the eyes on them.

"They're staring." She says. She's gotten accustomed to not having to speak very loud when with Kratos and Yuan. "Is it that obvious I'm not from Tethe'alla?"

Kratos shifts his hand so it settles firmly around her waist. They're being very subtle about it—as was the Tethe'allan way. That, at least, hadn't changed in four thousand years—but Anna is still right. They're staring. He can't speak for every single person staring at them, but he can for the few men who were eyeing Anna in a very masculine way. Those are simple enough to glare away. It was the other ones he wasn't so sure about. Even if they didn't know the whole story, didn't even know about Sylvarant beyond the fact that it was supposed to be the moon, they sensed that there was something about either Anna or Kratos, or perhaps both, that didn't belong.

He can see the nervousness in Anna isn't gone. Not entirely. But Anna had never been one to take nervousness or fear very well. Those kinds of emotions were turned into anger or rebelliousness. Usually a mix of both.

"Planning to offend their delicate sensibilities?" Kratos murmurs just loud enough for her to hear.

Anna smiled in a way that Kratos knew meant trouble. "Of course not. I'm just gonna get some food and make some conversation."

It's a female thing, how they can say the truth, and mean it, but add a certain inflection in their voice that changes the meaning entirely. "Just don't make yourself sick."

Anna is all confidence as she slips out from his arm and strides toward the tables laden with food. Kratos can smell the strawberries from here and knows that those will be the first thing on her plate. He's become accustomed to limiting his senses—it was healthier for everyone that he did—and he can hear Anna's voice, but not the words and he can see a trio of women speaking to her, but he's never been good at reading the lips of strangers.

A moment later, the women look affronted and Anna is returning to where he'd moved to stand beneath a tall tree, a plate of berries and small cuts of meat in her hand. "I thought you were underestimating them when you said their sensibilities were delicate. You weren't."

Kratos plucks a raspberry from the plate. "I know."

Anna looks at him. "I'd forgotten that you deal with the Tethe'allans a lot."

"It's more than that. I was raised among these kinds of people."

That was the easiest part to forget of all the things she knew about Kratos, that he'd been born into the higher classes. He never seemed to come from any specific place. There was a slight accent to his voice, but it wasn't a regional thing as much as it was the fact that he'd been born four millenia ago. Yuan's accent was the same and she'd become so accustomed to it that she hardly noticed it anymore. Nothing about him hinted at where he began life.

"So what did you say to offend their terribly delicate sensibilities?"

Anna's eyes glittered. "Well, I tried to be polite at first. But when one of them mentioned just how short my dress was-" Automatically, Kratos glanced down. The dress brushed her knees, but compared to way that some of these women were dressed...or rather, not dressed… "I said something about how it must have taken her twenty tries a day over twenty days to get into that dress," Kratos had to agree. Some of these outfits he didn't even want to ponder how the women fit into them. Surely, they couldn't all be toothpicks? "But it would take a schoolboy's wink to get her out of it."

Kratos chokes on a strawberry. Anna laughs as he regains his breath. "Offensive enough for you?" She asks cheekily, rubbing his back.

Kratos glared a little at her, but it flowed right past her. Grown men had cowered at it, but this woman… "Have you had your fun?"

"For now, yes."

Kratos sets their now empty plate down on the low garden wall. "Dance with me, then."

Anna doesn't protest, though she thinks it fair to warn him. "I'm not much of a dancer."

"Neither am I."

Anna doesn't know this music, can't even recognize the tune like she usually could with Jayson's hums. Their dance was simple. Hands touching hands, the movements smooth, but not in the way of dancers, but in the way of warriors as they whirled. They stepped on each others toes at times and Anna stumbled more often than not—really, how did people expect her to be graceful in a dress of all things if she wasn't even remotely graceful in her own comfortable clothes?—but that didn't mean it wasn't enjoyable nonetheless.

-/-/-/-

They travel as they did in Sylvarant, sleeping under the stars. At first, Anna thinks Kratos might have finally gone a bit crazy as he said that there was no need for a nightwatch.

"This is the flourishing world." He explained. "There are few to no monsters, save for perhaps some of the more remote areas."

"You're telling me that Cruxis controls monsters as well?" Anna should find it difficult to believe, but she doesn't. Spending so much time with the Renegades and Kratos has stretched her ideas of impossible.

Anna stares once she sees exactly how long the Grand Tethe'alla Bridge stretched. Then she turned to grin at Kratos. "Think they're compensating for something?"

Kratos is sure that Anna has been spending far too much time with the Renegades.

-/-/-/-

Sybak reminds her somewhat of Palmacosta. A studious town, much more so than Palmacosta, but also with it's own dock. The people here are polite and only a few of them give them strange looks.

"Do we really stick out that much?" Anna asks as they enter the inn for a meal.

"Syback is an extension of Meltokio. Most of the people who come here are either here for a boat or to study at the university. They have one of the largest libraries in existence. Well, not counting the elves."

"What can I get you two?" The young man pushes his glasses higher on the bridge of his nose.

"Ale and some of the cook's spiced potatoes." Kratos replied. Once the teen had left, he said, "Sybak has some of the best spiced potatoes."

"And you can taste them?"

"Enough. I can taste them enough."

"Quite the compliment. So, where exactly is Flanoir from here?" She asked, trying to get her bearings. After weeks of scouring Sylvaranti maps when they'd been searching for Kratos, she's sure she can't get lost in her home world, but here…everything is different here.

"Northeast. Actually, to get to Altamira, we have to take a boat from here."

"Altamira's an island?"

"Very nearly. The only way by land to get there is blocked by mountains."

They thank the young man who was their server as he brings their order. Anna pokes cautiously at the potatoes as she asks quietly, "And are the boats run on Exspheres, same as the Bridge?"

"Some of them, yes."

"They don't know how Exspheres are made, do they?" Anna takes a bite of the potatoes. Kratos was right. They were damn good.

"There are no ranches here. They don't know that Exspheres could be harmful without the Key Crest. There's been research into the Cruxis Crystals, the Chosen's, as it's the only one in this world, but they haven't gotten very far. The Exsphere mines are jobs for many people. They power many of their machines."

"Exspheres are that ingrained into Tethe'allan society?"

"Yes."

"I can see why Yuan has a problem with Tethe'allans."

"And me by extension? I was born Tethe'allan as well."

"Yeah, but you're you. My theory for you is that you were confused with a Sylvaranti child at the clinic and were brought to your house by accident." Anna said, taking a long draught of ale.

Kratos chuckled. In some part of him, he wishes that she was right, that he was supposed to have been raised differently_ (But if he had, he never would have met Yuan, or Martel or Mithos…And he never would have felt all the heartache and the pain, but then, he would never have even had the chance to meet Anna and somehow that makes it all okay)_. But he remembers hearing how very much he looked like his father had when he was young, but he had his mother's auburn hair and temperament.

"Yuan is of a similar opinion, though his involves someone stealing me out of my original home through the window and then giving me up for military experiments."

Anna laughs. "When exactly did he come up with that?"

"He tends to change it every now and then." The last time, Yuan had come into Kratos' office, plopped himself down on the desk and proceeded to tell him, in great detail, the nature of the thief who'd stolen him and the many government conspiracies that had happened because of him.

"Variety is the spice of life, or so I'm told. When's the boat leave?"

"I was told in about an hour."

Anna leaned forward, her forearms on the table. "Would Sybak happen to have a bakery?"

-/-/-

Sybak's bakery was a small one, squeezed in between a sprawling bookstore and an apartment building, but the wide window with carefully painted letters with its display of pastries looked absolutely delectable.

Kratos' arm tightened around Anna's waist just a fraction. She glanced at him. "What's got you grumpy?"

"The men to the right of us."

"The ones sitting on the steps to the apartment building?"

"Mm."

Anna gave them a sidelong look. "They don't look terribly threatening." Then again, after sparring with Kratos and Yuan, very few men could seem threatening.

"It's the way they're looking at you. Like you're a piece of meat."

Anna laughed, unable to help it. _That_ was what this was about? "They won't try anything."

"You can't be sure of that."

"Well, if they do, they have the both of us to deal with and we can definitely handle the likes of them. Besides, keep glaring like that and you'll make the sweet cream in those cakes go sour."

Anna had never seen that particular expression on his face when he focused on what exactly was in the shop window.

"Perhaps we should buy a few, to spare innocents from the sour cream."

"Permaybehaps, I'm thinkin'." Anna said, smile unable to go away.

Watching Kratos go into the bakery ahead of her, Anna was struck by vague memories of Nolan the times he'd gone into the bakery in Luin with a pocketful of coins and no parents to hold him back. Nolan had gotten sick every one of those times, but knowing Kratos, he wouldn't go quite that far.

Once they were out of the bakery, Anna plucked one of the cream-filled cakes from the box. As he was carrying the box—it wasn't a large box, simply wide, which meant he needed both hands—Anna offered him a bite.

"Soured cream doesn't taste so bad."

Anna arched an eyebrow. "Oh really?" She leaned up and stole a kiss. The taste of the cream still lingered on his lips. "Tastes plenty sweet to me."

-/-/-/-

Anan gripped the railing of the boat as it rumbled to life beneath her. She'd never been nervous on boats. She'd grown up with them. Granted, the boats in Luin weren't the fabled grand boats of Palmacosta, but they were used for fishing and living and for fun.

"Is it supposed to be doing that?" She asked as the rumbling continued.

"It's the engine."

She stared at him oddly. "Boats don't need engines. They have sails."

"In Sylvarant, that's true. Here, they're more technologically advanced."

"Sounds like a damn dragon." Anna muttered.

"A dragon whose meat pie was stolen."

"What?" Anna laughed. It wasn't the most ridiculous things she'd ever heard, but it was certainly up there.

"In Derris-Kharlan, there is a dragon who guards the teleportation circle to Mithos' room. We'd asked various dragons for help before."

"Yes, because that doesn't sound absolutely insane. Let's ask a vicious dragon for help."

"It seemed like a good idea at the time." Kratos said, slightly defensive. "In any case, we were turned down at the time."

"Dragons are intelligent?"

"Moreso than any elf and they've a love of puzzles."

"The stories I was told as a kid always made them sound like mindless animals who liked to ravage towns for no reason."

"Those have been grossly distorted over time. Those kinds of stories started as warriors sitting in mess halls trying to outdo each other in terms of scars."

"Which part of that is supposed to surprise me? So the dragons were turning you down and…?"

"One of the last dragons who would speak to us lived in Shadow's temple, in the mountains. He was one of the more vicious dragons and he had a temper, but he agreed to meet with us. According the their protocol, dragons have to be presented with gifts."

"What do you give a dragon?" Anna asked.

"Exactly. Yuan had the idea to present him with meat pies. Lots of them. He heard us out, but told us that he wouldn't help to pervert the world in that way. Yuan and Mithos were both accomplished pickpockets and they stole back several of the meat pies."

Anna groaned. "Could they have thought of a stupider thing to do?"

"I doubt it. The War had taken its toll on everyone and there was little prey, even for a dragon, since so much of the world had been torn apart. Dragons can go for decades without eating if they have a good meal, but I suppose that this dragon was so hungry that he agreed to help if Mithos and Yuan would give him back his meat pies."

"Let me guess, he got growly?"

"He was growly for a good long time, but eventually, he stopped. He's old now and he's gotten long in the tooth. I don't think he sees very much point in it anymore."

Kratos still sees that same dragon when he visits Mithos' castle in Derris-Kharlan and it saddens him that that great creature had been reduced to what it was. Leathery wings shrunken and damaged to the point that it could no longer fly, scales that had once been harder than diamond and shone as dark as ebony were now dulled. That temper had been cooled to the point where it was difficult to rouse the dragon at all.

Kratos takes another sweetcake from the box. "Something wrong?" He asked as Anna watched him amusedly.

"Doria was right. There are some things that boys never outgrow."

"You have your nutcakes, Yuan has the cinnamon rolls and I have these cakes." Kratos grumbled, taking another bite.

Anna chuckled and leaned against him, watching the ocean roll by.

-/-/-/-

It was incredible really, how the sand back home in Triet and the sand here on the beach could feel so different. Triet's sands were similar to the land and people of Triet itself; rough, a little brittle and unforgiving. The sand here in Altamira was very white and the setting sun reflecting off it made it seem very bright.

The ocean seemed ablaze with the sun's rays. Anna slipped out of her boots and left them out of reach of the waves and stepped close enough to the water that it lapped at her ankles. It was cold, but refreshingly so.

She turned back to Kratos. "Are you gonna come swimming with me?"

He smiled at her. "In a bit." For now, he simply wished to sit on the sand and enjoy the day. When he looked over again, Anna was lifting her shirt hem. "Anna!"

"What?" She turned, confused.

Kratos averted his eyes. It wasn't that he hadn't seen her without clothes before, but those had been very different circumstances. "You—you should be clothed."

Anna rolled her eyes. "Relax, would you? I have a bra on. Besides, I'm not going to go swimming in my clothes. That's uncomfortable."

Kratos shifted a little. "It doesn't seem right."

Anna walked closer so that she could hear better. "What?"

Even this close, Anna only heard pieces of what he was saying. "A man of my years…feels like…taking advantage…"

"'Taking advantage?'" Anna repeated. "Of what? Me?" Kratos didn't answer, but then, he didn't really have to. "You wouldn't do that."

"Sometimes, those sorts of things don't happen…on purpose."

"Kratos, I know you're not much of a talker, but you've really gotta do a little better."

Kratos could feel himself stepping into potentially dangerous territory now. "It is simple for an…experienced man to…delude a young woman into believing herself in love with him. It's trickery, even if the man doesn't intend it."

Anna is trying to think of when she'd ever told him that she was in love with him and can't remember a time. Not that she didn't love him. Of course she did. But now wasn't the time to get into that discussion.

"Do you love me or not?" She demanded, trying to get them into simpler ground.

"That isn't the topic under discussion." Kratos said, standing simply because he really needed something to do.

Anna snarled softly under her breath. _Men._ Defiantly, she tugged her shirt off as well as her pants—_he_ was the one with the problem, not her—and stepped into the water.

"We're not talking about love?" Anna asked, turning to him once she was about thigh-deep in the cold water. "Then what are we talking about? Sex?"

"_Anna!"_ Kratos said, outraged. "Is that what you think this is about? _Sex?"_

"If it isn't that, then what is it?" He wouldn't look at her. Going back to where he was standing, the water just lapping at his feet, she searched his eyes. She'd hurt him with her assumption.

Then she knew. She reached up to feel the thin chain around his neck, the one that held the locket. A lover's token, she'd thought before. She'd been right.

"You're in love with me?"

Kratos looked away.

"What's the harm in it?"

"…You're so young, Anna. You'd turn to me one day and see and old man. You'd want a younger one."

Anna sighed. The reverse of what he'd said could also be true. What if one day he looked at her and saw a child where he wanted a woman?

Anna gently turned his face so he would look at her. "…Can't we just go on with what we have? All those questions…neither of us have an answer for any of them…I _do_ love you, and maybe we should take it like everything else. One day at a time."

Kratos cupped her face in his hands and kissed her gently, lips lingering. "Agreed. One day at a time."

-/-/-/-

"Saltwater is a pain to get out of your hair." Anna said, coming out of the bathroom in the room they'd gotten for the night in Altamira's hotel. It was small, meant for only two people, but then again, there were worse places to sleep.

She was wrapped in a towel, the ends of her hair still dripping as she tugged a brush through the stubborn tangles. "Sometimes I think I should cut my hair short, just so it makes this easier." She said to Kratos, who was sitting on the bed, already dressed in his nightclothes.

Kratos came up behind her and took the brush from her hand. "Let me." He gently pulled the brush through her thick hair, carefully undoing any knots as he found them. "You shouldn't cut it. It looks better long."

"When you have to deal with it being temperamental every day, you tend not to think so." Anna said, smiling.

When he was finished, he set the brush down by the sink. Anna caught his hand and kissed the corner of his mouth in thanks. She was pulling away from him, but he tugged her closer and kissed her deeply. Her fragrance was warm and womanly and it mingled with that of the scented soaps in the bathroom.

Anna was powerfully aware of all the places their bodies touched at that moment. His palms, one cradling her jaw, the other on her back; her chest, hips and thighs against his. Her blood was pounding in her veins and she wondered vaguely if he could hear her heart going _thumpthumpthumpthump_ like rain pattering on a window.

-/-/-/-

"I've been considering all of Cruxis' recent problems." Yggdrasill said, hands folded in a steeple. "Do you know the conclusion I've come to?"

"I'm not a mindreader." Yuan tells him.

"Kratos is a traitor, yes, but we've been able to find no evidence of him working with the Renegades, so I don't believe he's the real problem. There are few other options for who the real problem is."

Yuan felt the air shift and knew that this wasn't going to end well. "What are those options?"

"The list is fairly short. Kvar, Rodyle, Magnius and you."

Yuan blinked. "Sorry? What was that last part?"

Yggdrasill got to his feet, every step that of a graceful predator. "You, Yuan. You have access to everything in Cruxis and you're smart enough to have held an uprising behind my back."

"Smart enough, maybe. But I haven't! Why would I?" Proving his innocence was damn hard when he was guilty.

"Because you don't agree with Cruxis anymore."

Yuan sees the tension in the lines of Yggdrasill's shoulders and knows that Yggdrasill is preparing to fight him. There would be no torture for him. But Yuan wasn't about to fight Yggdrasill. Not like this.

Yuan turned to run, but a brief flash of light had him sprawling. "I'm not going to fight you, Mithos." Even if it isn't Mithos Yuan is talking to, Yuan knows that the name will make Yggdrasill pause, perhaps stop to think.

Which he does and suddenly Mithos' eyes are looking out of Yggdrasil's face at him. "You're not the traitor?"

"No, I'm not. Think about it." Yuan hates the next words that come out of his mouth, but he knows that they're the only thing that might convince Mithos. "I loved Martel too and I want her back."

Yggdrasill's form shimmers and suddenly, Mithos is there again, a child once more. "I should've known." He says, offering Yuan a hand up. "Of course you'd want her back too."

"It's fine." Yuan tells him as he accepts the hand up. "You're stressed. We all are. But relax. We'll find the leader of those Renegades."

-/-/-/-

When Anna wakes, she's very warm. It takes her a moment to remember why. She turns her head so she can look at Kratos. Those odd eyes of his are watching her intently.

"Morning." She greets, stretching a little.

"Good morning." He smiles.

"This might not be the best time for this question, but do we have any of those cream cakes left?" Anna feels his chest shake with a laugh. Only Anna, Kratos thinks fondly. She pushes him good-naturedly, a difficult thing to do when lying down, but she had some measure of success. "We didn't eat dinner last night."

"And whose fault is that?"

"You started it." Anna reminds him.

"I didn't hear any objections. And there might be one or two left."

Anna wraps the sheet around herself—she doesn't know why, really. He'd already seen her bare, but she supposes it's a thing of habit—and walks across the room to the box. There are three left and she brings the box back to the bed.

There is a long comfortable silence as they eat their breakfast until Anna asks, "So what now?"

Kratos takes her hand, gripping it gently. "One day at a time." He reminds her.

-/-/-/-

"_Only love of a good woman will make a man question his every chioce, every action. Only love makes a warrior hesitate for fear that his lady will find him cruel. Only love makes a man both the best he will ever be and the weakest. Sometimes all in the same moment."—Wicked__** (Harlequin)**_


	28. Chapter 28

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Been sick lately, so lots of time at home (hence why this is finished so quickly). Also, lots of GI Jane is on during the day and I've been watching it, so that might account for some of this chapter's mood.

Stuff I've been listening to while writing this—Swinging on a Star by Frank Sinatra, Living on a Prayer, You Give Love a Bad Name and It's My Life by Bon Jovi and some Trans-Siberian Orchestra. Strange mix, but I'm in a strange mood.

-/-/ 

"_Women of this country learned long ago. Those without swords can still die upon them. I fear neither death nor pain."_

"_What do you fear, my lady?"_

"_A cage. To stay behind bars until use and old age accept them. And all chance of valor has gone beyond recall or desire."_

_-Eowyn and Aragorn__** (Lord of the Rings—The Two Towers)**_

-/-/

Kratos sees that there's something wrong with Yuan the moment he steps into the room. Yuan hides it well, but there's a stiffness to the way he's walking, a tiredness to his movements.

Yuan looks up when he enters. "How was your trip?"

"Forget the trip. What happened?"

"Nothing." Kratos doesn't say anything, doesn't touch him, simply gives him a look. Yuan knows better than to argue with that look. "Had a little chat with Mithos."

"About?"

"He thought I was the traitor." Seeing Kratos' sudden tension, Yuan assures, "We weren't discovered and I managed to get him off my trail."

"He hurt you."

"It's nothing serious." Yuan tells him, but shrugs his shirt up over his shoulders anyway. The Healer in Kratos wouldn't believe him until he saw the injury for himself.

Kratos' hand hovers over the burns. They weren't severe—they'd both had worse, certainly—but the burns were expansive, stretching across Yuan's entire back. They'd scabbed over somewhat and the skin was shiny with scars in places. "You healed it?"

"As much as I could, yes." Burns from light magic were tricky things.

Kratos summons the magic without hesitation. He can't heal all of it, not at once. There were limits even to magic, but he gets it so that the burns are at least scarring over.

Kratos isn't quite sure whether this is a good thing or not. Mithos feeling less sure of himself would mean that he didn't have the single-minded confidence of all these millenia, which meant that the Renegades had to be getting closer to toppling Cruxis if Mithos was getting uncertain. Or Mithos could be spiraling further into his madness until he didn't trust anyone at all.

Kratos returns from inspecting the bathroom cabinets for some salve. "Did you provoke him?" He asked quietly, smearing the salve across his friends back.

"I didn't, actually. It didn't even occur to me to try. He looked skittish from the moment I walked in."

"Skittish?" Not a word Kratos would use to describe Mithos Yggdrasill, even before he was mad.

"And on edge. Something else is bothering him and, with the way the situation is right now, neither of us can find out from him."  
"Are you planning on going digging?"

"Absolutely." Yuan shrugged his shirt back on and looked back at Kratos. "You never answered my question."

Kratos stows the salve beneath the sink. "…It was good."

Yuan tilted his head, reading his best friend. "Really?"

Kratos glanced at him. "You want details."

"Kratos, please, I'm a guy. We don't care about details."

Kratos arches an eyebrow before saying, "Alright. If you say so." And begins to leave the room.

"Dammit, Kratos." Yuan strides after him. His back isn't murdering him with every step, so he's fervently grateful that Kratos is such a good Healer. "Details, man. I deserve them after a year of working to get you two together."

Kratos simply smirks at him. After a year of nagging and pushing and prodding, it was the least that Yuan deserved. He'd tell him eventually though. Eventually.

-/-/-/-

Botta is the first one she sees the next morning. He's at the stove and whipping up something good from the smell of it.

"Welcome back." He says, smiling. Botta was a morning person, as Anna had been surprised to learn. He was usually in bed early and woke long before dawn.

"Thanks." Anna peers around him at the eggs in the frying pan. "Why are you the one cooking?"

"Doria asked for a few days free. She was going to Asgard."  
Anna frowned a little. Doria's son was gone and her husband hadn't been seen since he was taken to the ranch. Who did she have to go back for? Anna pushed those thoughts from her head and leaned her arms on the counter, looking at Botta.

"We're not going to die from food poisoning, right?" Anna asked as Botta handed her a plate loaded with eggs.

"Only one way to find out."

Anna eyed him warily before taking a cautious bite of the eggs. "Where did you learn to cook like this?"  
"I was the oldest of five. My mother needed a lot of help, so I was usually the one volunteered."

"Huh." Anna thought about her sister, the one she'd never met, the one whose name she didn't even know. "Must be nice to have siblings."  
"It is." Botta agreed. "But they could be annoying sometimes." Anna laughed and leaned back against the counter. "How were the days off?"

Anna heard the question beneath the words _(How was spending time with Kratos away from the Renegades?)_ and had it come from someone else, she might've been a little annoyed. "It was good. Tethe'alla is incredible, but I think I still prefer Sylvarant. Feels…righter."

"I agree, but then, I am slightly biased. I don't like the snow." And Flanoir was all that half the Renegades had seen of Tethe'alla.

"You're from Palmacosta right?" Botta nodded. "It never seems to get cold there."

"Did Luin get very cold?"

"The lake would frost over most years and the ground would be real slushy, but nothing even close to Flanoir. We never had snowmen and stuff."

"We only ever heard about snow. Snowmen and frost, those were all things for calendars."

"It's the opposite in Tethe'alla." Both Botta and Anna turn to Jayson, who snatches some bacon out of the frying pan. "It's hard to find anyplace where it _doesn't_ snow during the winter. Altamira's actually the only one I can think of."

"Eavesdropping is rude, y'know." Anna says without any real venom.

"Being rude never stopped him." Shera said with a yawn.

Jayson eyes his sister and grabs a plate and snatching more bacon and a few spoonfuls of eggs and gently pushing it into her hands. "Eat. You're going to need your strength today."

Shera frowned at him. "I'm fine."

"You had a long night and you need nourishment." Jayson said in a voice that allowed for no arguments.

Shera accepts the food grumpily and leans against the counter beside Anna.

"I've never seen him that protective." Anna says to her as Jayson fills his own plate with food before going to eat outside.

"He doesn't really get like that anymore." Shera smiles a little into her glass of tea. "It was refreshing."

"Why the long night?"

Shera shrugged. "It was just a bad night, is all. The babies didn't want to sleep and then one of the kids had a nightmare. It was one of those real bad ones, y'know? The kind that when you wake up, you're not sure whether you're in reality or still in your dream, so you tiptoe around everyone and everything until morning comes?"

Yes, Anna knew about those nightmares. She'd gotten them a lot when she was freshly out of the ranch. They still came sometimes, but it was once in a blue moon now.

"Well, she had one of hose, so I stayed up with her. The girl woke up _screaming_ and I couldn't get a coherent word out of her for a while and she still won't say what it was she was dreaming about."

"Maybe she just doesn't want to say." Anna suggested. "Kids like to have their secrets."

"Maybe." Shera agrees, but she doubts it.

Noishe pads into the kitchen warily, as though he was waiting for Doria to shoo him out as she usually did. When there is no cook bustling him out, Anna half-expects him to put his paws up on the counter so he could steal some food, but he doesn't. Instead, he just huffs a little and sits by the back door, eyes on the outside.

Anna frowns at that. Noishe stood guard at the door, yes, but only at night and never with that kind of alertness. Noishe has all the intelligence of a person—something that Anna sometimes thinks she should find a little disturbing, but she doesn't—but also has every single bestial instinct and Anna's learned to trust his instincts.

"Noishe." The protozoan's eyes turn to her, but his large ears are still pricked towards the desert. "Something wrong?"

Noishe whuffed and did a movement with his shoulders that Anna guessed was supposed to be a shrug. She wonders for a moment whether he'd always had humanistic gestures like that or if he'd started picking it up after he met Kratos and Yuan.

Botta noticed it too. "We can't be on guard all day. There's work to be done."

Anna followed him out of the room, but not without a last glance at Noishe, looking like little more than a statue.

-/-/-/-

"What's wrong?" Kratos asks a few nights later at dinner. It was their first real time away from the others since they returned. Something had made the ranches more active in the countryside and all of the Renegades had been hard-pressed to be everywhere at once.

Anna pushes some of her rice around her plate as she chewed thoughtfully. Once she swallows, she replied, "Noishe has been acting odd lately. I haven't seen him move from that spot by the back door since we got back."

Kratos frowns. "That is strange. Has he eaten?"

"Not that I've seen."

And that was the strangest part. Kratos knew how much Noishe liked to get into mischief (Kratos blamed Yuan for that—mostly.) and with Doria having only returned yesterday, why hadn't the protozoan taken advantage of that?

"Can protozoans get sick?" Anna wondered aloud.

"It's rare." Kratos replied, mind not focused on her question. "Their blood used to be used as part of a healing vaccine because it was immune to many diseases."

"Did they used to be common?"  
"Moreso then than now, but no, not really. Mithos had a theory that it was because protozoans evolve up the evolutionary ladder so many times in one lifetime and that that's why angels' blood and immune system are as strong as they are."

"It makes sense. Does Noishe have anymore to evolve or is he done?"

"If the legends hold true, in another few hundred years, he'd become a person."

Anna smiles. "Sounds like trouble waiting to happen."

"Mm." Kratos stood and bent to kiss her before pulling away. "I'm going to check on him."

-/-/-/-

Yuan comes downstairs because he'd needed to walk around, having been stuck behind his desk all day doing paperwork. When he glimpses Kratos crouched in front of Noishe, inspecting him and murmuring quietly, he veers into the kitchen.

"What happened?"  
"Anna said that he'd been acting strangely lately." Kratos replies, not looking up. He runs his hands over the powerful muscles of Noishe's legs to see if he'd pulled anything by accident or had gotten injured, and checking his eyes for any cloudiness. "But I can't see that anything's wrong."

Noishe whuffed.

Yuan crossed his arms. "Do you think it's a storm he's sensing? Animals are sensitive to those sorts of things."

Noishe shook his large head.

"You couldn't be any more vague, could you?" Yuan says a little irritably. He was never in the best of moods after doing paperwork.

A short growl slipped past Noishe's teeth.

"Children." Kratos said warningly. Knowing Yuan, he'd keep arguing. Kratos looks back at Noishe. "Any problems and you raise the alarm."

"When did he get reduced to guard dog?" Yuan asks once they leave the kitchen. Outside is better than inside. Much better. No walls, nothing to impair the fresh air, the sand getting in Yuan's boots and the sheer sense of _freedom_.

Then again, Yuan's always had a flair for the dramatic and sometimes he wonders if he would muse on things like freedom had it not been so strange to him for his childhood years.

"Have you felt it?" Yuan asks.

Kratos glanced sideways at him. Those with elven blood were much more sensitive to the workings of the earth, half-elves especially since they were sensitive to human issues as well as magical and elven ones. "What, specifically?"

Yuan shrugs a little and looks out at the expanse of the desert. "Something's been feeling…off…for a while. I thought it was just me, but since Noishe is feeling it too…"

Kratos shook his head. "I haven't felt anything out of the ordinary."

"Perhaps it's just me being nervous since I saw Mithos last."

"Never thought I'd hear you admit to being nervous."

"Well, Mithos wasn't exactly supposed to get so close to finding us out."

"That does mean something's wrong with Mithos. He may be becoming more unstable."

"I don't think his influence reaches Sylvarant. He hasn't come down from Derris-Kharlan in centuries."

"It would explain why he suspected you. If he _has_ come down to Sylvarant, he would've heard the rumors of the Renegades and someone might've let it slip that they'd seen us coming out here. Or that they saw you talking with me or Anna. Mithos isn't a moron. He never has been. He can put two and two together."

"That's what's making this whole rebellion harder than it has to be. Cruxis is so ingrained into the worlds that it's nearly impossible to get around it."  
"But now the Renegades have influence in Tethe'alla as well." Kratos pointed out. "It'll be easier."

Yuan gave him a disbelieving look. "Hard times bring doubt into people. If anything, Cruxis is _more_ ingrained in Tethe'alla."

"To unravel Cruxis, we have to take it from all angles. Besides," Kratos leaned backwards until his shoulder blades were against the wall. "You didn't think this would be easy, did you?"

"Of course not." Yuan snapped. "But damn if I don't get frustrated sometimes."

"You ever think about taking a short holiday yourself?" Kratos suggested. "It does wonders."  
Yuan grinned slyly at him. "Oh, I'm sure it does."

Kratos glared a little, but it had no real venom behind it. "You're making too much of this."

"Kratos, you're the happiest I've seen you in several millennia. I don't think I'm making nearly enough of it." Kratos is about to reply, but Yuan cuts him off. "Relax. I'm just saying that I'm happy for you. It's about time you had something good."

-/-/-/-

"No more nightmares?" Anna asks, warming one of the bottles. She still isn't very good at this whole baby thing, but she doesn't feel like such a stranger to it anymore.

Shera shook her head. "Nope. Whatever it was that was bothering her, it seems to have gone. And the babies have been sleeping well."

"That's good. Have you heard—"

They both whipped around as Noishe barked once, loudly, as he dashed past the nursery and up the stairs.

"Anna?" Shera asked, startled by the expression on the young woman's face. "What's wrong?"

"Where's Kratos?" Anna asked, but she didn't wait for an answer as she ran after Noishe, Shera on her heels.

Noishe jerked to a halt in front of a door that Anna recognized and pawed at it. Anna stopped there as well. Once he was sure that Anna knew what he wanted, he bolted down the stairs, snarling.

Anna banged the door with her fist once before flinging it open. "Kratos!"

Kratos froze in the act of reaching for a pair of pants on his bed. He slowly straightened to face them. Shera couldn't stop herself from giving Kratos one quick—and approving—glance.

Anna didn't even seem to notice that she'd walked in on a naked man. "Noishe says that there's somebody's coming. Here."

Kratos stared at her for a moment before he grabbed his pants and started putting them on. "Where?"

"He went downstairs."

Kratos has his sword in his hand and is out the door before either woman knows he's gone. Anna jerks open a drawer in Kratos' nightstand and takes out several knives that she knows he keeps in there. Handing one to Shera, she tells her, "Tell your brother, Botta, anyone you can find. Get the people who can't fight into the hangar, just in case."

Shera nods before running out. Anna does the same, but in the other direction. Downstairs, towards the others.

When she's nearly at the back entrance, she has to duck behind the counter as bullets whiz past her head. "Jeez, what the hell's going on?" Anna muttered. She only had two knives, having given the third to Shera and really, knives vs. a gun were not a match-up she was keen on having.

Anna looked up to see Jayson by the door and he sort of crouch-ran toward where she was. "Any idea how many?" He asked.

"Not a clue."

He clicked his tongue and took a gun from where he had it at the small of his back. "Fan-freaking-tastic." He peered above the counter carefully and had to duck back down. Once the bullets stopped, he stood up and shot towards the other gunmen before coming back down.

They both waited for long heartbeats, listening for any movement. When they didn't hear anything, they both poked their heads out, half-expecting to be shot where they crouched.

When they weren't, they both stood and walked outside cautiously. There were two of them, helmets covering their faces and blood leaking out from chest wounds.

"You're a good shot." Anna told him as she bent to take the guns from the dead men's hands.

"I had to hunt for food back home. Guess it paid off." Jayson studied the bodies. "Any idea who they are?"

Anna looked at the guns and then back at the guards. "These are standard issue Desian guns. Their uniform looks like Desian, it's just camouflaged."

"How'd the Desians find us?"  
"Doesn't matter. They're here and we need to make sure that they don't get to the others inside. We should-"

She was cut off by a wave of bullets. They both ran back inside and Anna sagged against the wall, one hand to her left arm. "They got me."

Jayson glanced at her. "Is it bad?"

"Don't feel like it. Probably just a graze." Anna looked at him. "There were at least ten of them and there's only two of us and these idiot Desians wasted half a clip on us."

Jayson smiled grimly. "Always did love those odds."

They each take one side of the doorway. As soon as the Desians come into view, they shoot. Though Anna isn't much better than a decent shot at best, her left arm is stinging something fierce and it threw off her aim for a few shots before she adjusted to compensate for it.

One made it past them. He was limping, but he made it to the doorway. Anna didn't think. Her foot came up and down to the side, snapping his uninjured knee. The man howled and fell to the ground, clutching his leg.

Jayson and Anna hid behind the wall as another hail of bullets assaulted them. "You'd think they'd run out of ammo eventually. " Jayson said irritably. "And there's still five of them."

Anna was about to say something when the air suddenly grew tense and electric, like it did before a thunder storm. But a storm, here? In the middle of the desert?

Then the air flashed white and a spell circle easily the size of the entire kitchen appeared on the sand beneath the Desians' feet. A second later, an indigo blade struck the ground and shocked the entire area.

When the Desians didn't move for several long minutes, Anna steps outside, searching for the source of the magic. She's startled to see Yuan hovering fifty feet in the air and slowly coming down.

"Noishe just found me." He says by way of explanation, Swallow in his hand. He doesn't look like the man Anna knows. The colors and shape are the same, but there's a hardness that hadn't been there before. Or rather, hadn't been obvious before. Anna imagines that this is what he was like during the War. "Where's Kratos?"  
"Out front, I'd guess."

"Then we don't have to worry about anyone getting in through there. I'll check the other exit to make sure that no one's gotten through there. You two hold this position. Others are on their way down to help."

They both nodded. Yuan shot into the air, disappearing over the roof. Jayson beckoned Anna closer to him. "Let me see that graze of yours, just to make sure it's not serious."  
Anna rolled up her sleeve and Jayson whistled low. "That's a pretty deep graze. I ain't the best Healer, but I think I can stop it from bleedin'." He mutters a First Aid spell and the air goes thin for a minute as he uses the mana. Jayson knows he'll never become a great mage. He doesn't have the patience for it and he was never as intelligent as Shera. Not to say he was dumb, but he was an average kind of smart.

Anna has to twist her arm at a strange angle to see the wound. Jayson was right, he had stopped the bleeding and had been able to get it to sort of half scab over, like she'd had the wound for a day.

Noishe's barks reverberated through the base. Jayson and Anna frowned at each other. Who could've gotten in with Yuan and Kratos blocking the other entrances and the two of them standing here this entire time?

Anna glanced down. "Shit. The guy's gone."

"The one who's knee you broke? You're going to have to explain to me exactly how he managed to get away so quickly."

"You're assuming we're the only ones with magic. He must've healed himself. C'mon!"

"We can't leave this spot, Anna! What happens if someone gets past us?"

"Yuan said that reinforcements were on the way down here. We'll probably meet them on the way up. Come _on_!"

They scrambled up the stairs, nearly tripping half the time. They could hear stomping and loud footsteps upstairs and that only made them go faster. On one of the landings, a woman was crumpled against the wall. There was a pool of blood beneath her and her face was pale, far far too pale. Her eyes were fixed and staring, unblinking.

Anna was already halfway up the next flight of stairs _(Not because she doesn't care about the woman. She does, she does, but the woman's dead and Anna can't bring people back from the dead)_ when she realizes that Jayson wasn't following her.

"Jayson."

He had stopped, was still staring at her.

"Jayson!" Anna yelled. He turned, but his eyes were unfocused, almost as though he wasn't really seeing her. "We've got a Desian to catch. We can't let him get away."

Jayson didn't say anything. Just kept looking at her with dull eyes. _(This place was supposed to be _safe_. Even though they were fighting against Cruxis, even though they knew that they might fail or be caught at any time, the knowledge was distant. But this place wasn't safe anymore. People had died here.)_

Anna went down the few steps separating them and slapped him hard enough that her hand stung with the blow. It was harder than she'd meant to hit him.

Jayson's head whipped back and Anna braced herself for him to hit her back, but he didn't. He stood there, hands in fists and shaking with the urge to hit her_ (But Jayson's mother had raised him to never put a hand on a lady in anger)_ and his eyes blazing with rage. It wasn't only Anna's hitting him, but everything.

When Anna's sure that he isn't going to hit her back, she points upstairs and says, "The bad guy went that way. We need to go after him."

Jayson doesn't say anything more, but still follows her up. Anna keeps one hand on the banister for balance and the other with the gun pointing towards the ceiling. Botta nearly rams into her as he runs out onto the next landing.

"A Desian got in. You need to get the kitchen." Anna tells him. Botta doesn't question it. Had it been any other woman, he would have insisted that he go along as well _(It's not sexism. Not really. He has two younger sisters who he half-raised and he can't see a woman in danger and not think of them)_ but he's seen Anna train with Kratos, knows that she's made from a different mold than most any other woman.

A floor higher and Anna's heart stops when she hears the high pitched wails coming from the nursery. Heaven be merciful, don't let that Desian be in the nursery.

Jayson heard it too and he pushed past Anna, something giving him extra speed. All Anna heard him say was "My sister…"

She nearly runs into him because he stops suddenly at the door to the nursery. She has to get on her toes to see above his shoulder. Shera had the children behind her, the knife pointed towards the Desian, who was still favoring one leg, but there was little sign of the previously broken knee. He had a swaddle of blankets in his arms with a gun to it.

Anna shoved past Jayson, who was still frozen in the doorway. "You're a damn coward."

The Desian turned. "What?"

"You're taking women and infants hostage. The hell kind of person does that? No, don't answer. I'll do it for you. A coward does that."

The Desian limped closer. There was a thin line of blood soaking his shirt sleeve and Anna can only assume that Shera had managed to do that before he'd taken the baby.

"Do not. Call me a coward." He said through gritted teeth.  
Anna doesn't back down, though he's a good six foot something and he towers over her. She didn't back down from Yggdrasill and she refuses to back down from one of his pawns. "I will if I want to. And I've never met anyone who deserves it so much."

The Desian jerks his head to the corner where Shera and the others are. "Git over there before I go through with my threat. And drop the guns. Both of you."  
Anna and Jayson comply, but as Anna walks towards the others, she says, "Lemme guess, your boss mentioned something about a promotion if you agreed to do this."  
"What?"

"A promotion if you could find either the Angelus Project, right?"  
"What's it matter to you?"

Anna holds up her left hand, palm side down. Her Exsphere sparkles under the lights. "I'm the one they've been looking for. You put down that baby and promise to leave without hurting anyone else, I'll go with you. No questions asked."  
"Anna, don't be an idiot." Shera says, but Anna makes a 'Shh' motion with her right hand.

"Well?" Anna prompts. "Do we have a deal?"

The Desian slowly sets the baby down on a table and gestures Anna forward. His hand clamps down on her arm—the wounded one, no less—and he begins to drag her outside. With her free hand, Anna snatches the gun from where he'd holstered it at his hip and tosses it to Jayson.

The Desian whips around, making Anna's arm twist at a painful angle, and brings her in front of him so she's shielding him. And though she's small, Jayson knows he can't get a good vital hit with her standing there.

But he doesn't have to. Anna tosses her head back so that it slams into his nose and twists her arm free. She spins and thrusts her foot out in a sharp kick that sends him sprawling backwards. She doesn't let him get up though, settling her foot on his sternum.

Noishe and Kratos are at the door in the next instant, Noishe's teeth and muzzle red as he snarled at the Desian. Kratos glanced at Anna. She had the situation under control, so he went around the room making sure no one was hurt.

A rainbow of bruises was probably going to be painted on Shera's face in the morning, but that was the worst of it. In this room, at least.

"Yuan and a search team are hunting down the last of them. We can't let even one escape and get back to the ranch that sent them."

Anna hauls the Desian to his feet by his shirt collar, keeping the knife to his throat. "What do you want to do with him?"

Anna felt the Desian shudder at the look that Kratos gave him. "Keep him in that storage room on the third floor. The one that no one really uses. I'll take care of him later."

"Sure thing. Jayson, you wanna help me get the big guy downstairs? He's damn heavy." Jayson glances uneasily at his sister. Anna knows that he doesn't want to leave her, but she needed help with the guy. "You don't wanna leave poor ol' me defenseless now, do ya?"

Kratos almost snorts a laugh. Anna, defenseless? She never seemed defenseless. Not once since he'd met her. Put she had no guilt in playing the part if something needed to get done.

It hasn't been ten minutes since they left—he's helping Shera calm the children and the babies. He's never been good at this sort of thing and the baby feels awkward in his arms—when he hears a solid _thud_ mingled with a _crack_ and Anna muttering creative curses before there are two gunshots.

He must've made some movement because Shera takes the baby from his arms before he's thinking about it and he's downstairs in three seconds.

The Desian is lying in a pool of his own blood and other fluids, a bullet hole above his right eyebrow and one in his shoulder. Anna is leaning against the wall, hand to her side and glaring at the Desian with Jayson just lowering his arms, the gun in his hands.

"Are you alright?" Kratos asks her. He can't smell any blood other than the Desians, but he needs to be sure.

"I'm fine. Feels like he broke a rib with that kick though. He's a quick sonovvabitch."

"Are you good to walk?" He asks. He wants to save his magic for the injuries he knows are worse because he saw the woman on the stairs and he knows that there are probably some people almost in that state once they get a good report of who's still alive.

Anna waved him away. "I'm fine. Worry about the others. You're going to anyway."

Sometimes, Anna doesn't know what Kratos sees when he looks at her. Like now. His expression is unfathomable, the emotion there one that Anna doesn't recognize. "You sure you're alright?"

He's still not fully healed fro the torture, not yet_ (I saw you dead…)_ and that's why he's pushing this.

"Seriously, I'm _fine._ Go, take care of the others. I'll see you tonight, yeah?"

Kratos kisses her quickly _(They both say that the other tastes of salt and copper right at that moment)_ before looking back at Jayson. The seraphim doesn't have to say anything to him to know that he'll watch her to make sure she didn't decide to do anything stupid.

-/-/-/-

There are thirteen Renegades and thirty-eight Desians dead. Six Renegades are injured severely with twelve more with minor injuries. Still, it could have been worse. Much worse.

"Were you able to catch all of them?" Anna asks Yuan when he's checking up on her. There had been a lot of people in the infirmary today and in a weird way, he's glad to see her, even if it is here. "The Desians."

"Yeah. One nearly got all the way into Triet, but…you know how the Trietians are about Desians. They blocked off all escape routes once they saw I was chasing him."

"Did you manage to find out how they found us?"

Anna winces as Yuan gently inspects the wound on her arm. It's scabbed over and healing nicely—or so Yuan tells her—but it's still tender. "Sorry.' Yuan says before replying. "My best guess is that Kvar or Forcystus is having the traffic in this area checked and that's how they found us. Hopefully, the loss of thirty-eight of their men will make them lose confidence about doing it again."

"Hopefully. Or you need to get that invisibility spell working."

"I intend to do that regardless. It's proving tricky. Stand up for me? I need to get some X-rays. I know Kratos healed your rib, but better safe than sorry."

Anna complies. "Maybe you need to mix some dwarven magic with it. I think Dirk would help you."

Yuan glances up at her. He looks tired, but not in the usual 'I've had a long day' kind of tired. It was a heavy life-tiredness. "I hadn't considered that idea. I'll ask."

-/-/-/-

A week later, Yuan asks for her in the infirmary again. Anna has hardly seen him in the past week, Yuan having buried himself in his work and trying to track down which ranch the Desians came from.

"I need to talk to you." He says.

"I imagine so, since you called me here." Anna says, hopping up to sit on the counter. She's still not entirely comfortable with labs and infirmaries, but it's been getting better.

"I was going over your X-rays and I saw something strange."

"Stranger than the second Cruxis Crystal?"

"Strange was the wrong word." Yuan amended. "Unexpected is a better one."

"Okay. You wanna share with the class?"

"I need to confirm it first. Have you been feeling sick lately? In the mornings especially?"

"Once, on…" Anna cast her mind back. "Thursday, I think it was. But I figured it was just a late bad reaction to dinner."

"Mmhm. Any dizziness?'

Anna frowned at him. "No. Why all these questions?"

"Let me get another X-ray, just to be sure."

Anna sighs and stands, letting the machine hum over her. She thinks she's getting too used to this. "So?"

"Anna, I believe you're pregnant."


	29. Chapter 29

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Inception's out on DVD! I am so going to get it. I fell in love with that movie. Not sick anymore (YAY) but I have a crapload of math homework (Insert sarcastic cheer here) to make up. Anyone get quadratic equations and are willing to help a poor math-fail?

Pretty short chapter, but it'll be getting longer again soon. Got a project to make a lifelike dummy for 3D class and we're gonna set them up around the school to freak people out on Monday. Fun stuff.

-/-/

_The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new. ~Rajneesh_

-/-/

Anna has been keeping herself as busy as possible lately. Anything will do. Helping with the injured or going to the market in Triet to get some flowers for the thirteen dead_ (But she's stopped going to Triet so constantly because in Triet there are children and where there are children, there are mothers and she doesn't want to think about mothers right now)_

But today is a day off, so Anna isn't the only one in Triet. Noishe has followed her a lot lately, perhaps sensing her mood, and she's grateful for it. People company feels a little strange now and Noishe acts like a person enough of the time that Anna doesn't feel completely crazy for talking to him, but he isn't people company and Anna's become used to having him walk beside her.

Anna sees all of the colors of the market—more blues and silvers than usual—and she asks one of the shopkeepers, "Is it festival time again?"

The woman, skin dark and a patterned shawl shielding her head from the heat, smiles. "The year passes quickly sometimes, doesn't it? It is difficult to believe that the Summer Festival is back again."

"Yeah, I guess it does." Two months ago, it had been difficult to believe that she'd been out of the ranch for a year already. Four weeks ago, she'd found it difficult to believe that Kratos was actually in love with her. Now? She's supposed to be pregnant. A mother.

Noishe whuffed and nudged her elbow with his forehead. Anna lifts her arm to scratch at his head. "Yeah I know. Hard to believe, huh?" She smiles at the shopkeeper. "Thanks for the information."

Anna browses the market a little more, waving a little when a Renegade saw and greeted her. But she isn't entirely focused on what's going on. She's still remembering the conversation with Yuan.

_"What?"  
"You're pregnant, Anna."_

_ She shook her head. "Maybe you misread the X-ray."_

_ "I might have." Yuan admitted. "But being pregnant is more likely."_

_ Anna put her fingers to her forehead, leaning her elbow on the counter. "I _really _want to call you an arrogant ass right now."_

_"It wouldn't be the worst thing you've called me." Yuan points out._

_ "Especially when I count the things I haven't said to your face."_

_ Yuan decides against inquiring further into that. He sits back on his stool and looks at Anna. "…You don't seem…elated…about the news."_

_ "Did you expect me to jump for joy? Do cartwheels?"_

_ "No…__but the news usually goes over better."_

_ "Yuan, I got free a year ago. I'm still trying to get adjusted to the world. We're living and working in a Renegade base__. The kid is going to grow up here, in a rebel base. Sorry if I don't think I'm ready for a kid, to be a mother." _

_ "It's not like he wouldn't be the first to be born and raised here, Anna."_

_ "No, he wouldn't be. And as much as I love the kids here, kids should be raised away from…all this." Because even as much as she loves the Renegades, she can still remember her childhood in Luin. It was completely different than the childhood that the kids here are having._

_ "You have to take that up with Kratos, not me." He caught the flash of panic in her eyes. "I won't say anything to him if you don't want me to."_

_ "How am I gonna tell him? I'm not sure _I _believe it yet."_

_ Yuan played with his ring. "Wait until you believe it. Until you're more comfortable with the idea." _

_ The man he'd bought the rings from had advised the same thing when he'd had his momentary panic attack in the store. He remembers being so nervous, so _terrified _that she would say no, that she would refuse. It had taken him a week to calm down completely, to get comfortable with the weight of the ring in his pocket._

_ Anna smiles a little weakly at him. "That might take a while."_

_ Yuan chuckled. "Believe me, I know."_

_ Anna hesitates before asking, "…Did you and Martel ever want kids?"_

_ Yuan thinks about not answering. It's his first instinct n__ot to. But then he remembers that this is Anna and she has more than earned his trust. "I did. Martel was a little more hesitant. She still had to take care of Mithos, she'd say whenever I brought it up. But she thought about it sometimes."_

_ There's something in his tone, something not quite sad and not quite bitterswee__t but something inbetween. _

_ Again, Anna finds herself intrigued by this woman who she's heard little about, but the little she's heard makes her sound incredible. _

_ Anna pushes her hair back out of her face. "…I'll be in my room and I probably won't be at dinner."_

_ Yuan nods, unsurprised. "Sure."_

_ He brings some leftovers up that night anyway._

-/-/-/-

It's been a long time since he was on the surface and if feels _wrong_. Mithos had known about the mana shortage—who wouldn't?—but even during the Kharlan War, the air hadn't been so _thin_ and it's difficult to breathe for a few long minutes.

When he walks through the towns—looking like little more than a thirteen year old with a pretty face—he sees things. Present mixed with the past with memories thrown in and it hurts and he wants it to go away and he wants to watch it forever. He sees Martel in the smiles of some of the young women _(How can he not? He sees her everywhere. In the trees, in the wind)._ He sees her in the little girls skipping rope_ (Martel used to always skip rope, he remembers vaguely. Before they entered the War, she'd always be out front with some of the other girls and she'd invite him to play, but he wouldn't because he wasn't very good at it)_ and in the mothers leading their children by the hand.

It _hurts_ and he wishes he hadn't come.

But he has, so he listens and watches for any sign of these Renegades. He's heard that they're especially common on the Triet continent, but there isn't much out there and anyway, Mithos doesn't much like that continent. _(Because the Tree is there. The Tree with the nuts that she'd use for her flutes that she liked to sell in the market sometimes when they needed money)_

There is little to hear, though he does hear about those 'Dirty Desians'. It's not a strange thing to hear in Sylvarant, but it's the rest of it that make the real difference. The Desians that escaped and were tracked down and killed.

Later, when he goes back to Derris-Kharlan _(Where there are no Martels and no skip-ropes)_ he checks through the logs and finds that thirty-eight Desians are KIA, but other than that, there is no information about the mission. But then, Kvar was not person to trust either.

Mithos is sure that Kvar is, in some part, responsible for the rebellion, though the theory that he'd freed the Angelus Project isn't entirely out either. Had Kratos bribed or blackmailed him in some way? Perhaps. Or was Kvar acting on his own? Almost definitely. But was he innocent in the escape of the Angelus Project? Maybe.

It gives Mithos a headache, but some part of him is grateful for it. It had been a dull four thousand years.

-/-/-/-

Kratos drums his fingers on the desk. "Thirty-eight men to come after Anna? It doesn't seem logical. If they knew where we are, and who was here, they would've sent more teams or a larger team. It doesn't make sense."

"I agree, but we've looked at this from every angle," Thanks to technology, quite literally. "And there's no other way to look at it."

Kratos shook his head and leaned forward over the plans for the base. "There has to be some angle that we're missing."

Yuan's exhausted. A week and a half, he'd been going for long hours without much rest. He'd gone to Derris-Kharlan not six days ago because Yggdrasill wanted to know if he knew anything regarding the mysterious deaths of thirty-eight Desians.

Yuan told him no, but he'd look into it.

Then he'd had to put together a convincing story, but at least it had given him the name of the ranch where those Desians came from. Asgard. Why wasn't he surprised? Kvar wasn't a man to give up easily. And the healings and repairs and the funerals had all needed to get done and even with their manpower, Time seemed to simply slip past them.

True to his word, Yuan had said nothing of Anna's pregnancy to anyone. But right at this moment, Yuan found himself wondering what, exactly, would be Kratos' reaction to the news. Kratos had never showed any particular inclination to be a father, but he'd never outright said he never wanted it.

That was the annoying part about Kratos, Yuan thought, slightly irritated. He was so damn reserved.

Something must have shown on his face—or Kratos simply knew him that well (Yuan was leaning towards the latter)—because Kratos asks, "Is something bothering you?"

Yuan blinks out of his thoughts _(Can't tell him about Anna, can't, can't, can't)_. "These movements of the Desians. How did they find us?"  
"That is the million gald question." Kratos said. "Could there be another spy?"

When Yuan thinks 'spy', he immediately thinks 'traitor'. After all, who would know better than he what a spy is? And then he thinks of Makar and his belief that Yuan was simply leading the Renegades on_ (But they hadn't been the Renegades then. They'd been the mere beginnings, the mere seeds.)_

"Possibly, though I doubt it."

"We should do a psychological evaluation, just in case."

Yuan rubbed his forehead. "I'll do it. I'll say I'm checking for post-traumatic stress."

Kratos eyed him. "Are you sure you're up to it?"

"I'm fine, Kratos."

Kratos doesn't know how he's ended up best friends and lovers with the two most stubborn people ever in existence that they always refuse to admit that they're hurt or tired._ (But he loves Anna and Yuan. Even if in such vastly different ways, he loves them. Doesn't know what he'd do without them)_

Kratos leans back in his seat and crosses his arms. "How much have you slept in the past two weeks?" It isn't sleeping, what they do, but they have yet to find a better word for it.

Yuan is too tired to bother even trying to lie. "All together? Probably an hour, maybe two."

"You need sleep."  
"The work needs to get done."

"That's what you have lackeys for. I can divide the workload between Botta and myself while you sleep for at least a day. And yes, I know that you are perfectly capable of it."

It had been a long time since Yuan had slept through an entire day. Not since their military days, actually and that had only been the day after the War was officially declared over and everyone who was still alive had no interest in leaving their beds until well after noon. Martel and Mithos had actually come into his and Kratos' room to make sure he wasn't dead._ (It sounded funny now, so many centuries later, but during the War, it was a true concern. Martel had checked him for injuries and psychological stress and a dozen other things before she was convinced that, yes, he really was only sleeping)_.

Yuan smiled tiredly. "That actually sounds great." And if Kratos was going to be anything like this with his son—or daughter_ (Heavens above, he'd be so overprotective if he had a little girl)_—perhaps the kid wouldn't be so bad off.

-/-/-/-

When Kratos notices that there is more food at breakfast than usual—and it's been happening for a few weeks now—he asks Doria if that's on purpose.

Doria shakes her head. "It's Anna. She hasn't made it down for breakfast very much recently. She comes down, but only just and sometimes she looks a bit green around the gills."

"…I see." Anna would have said something if she were sick. He takes a plate that has a little bit of everything upstairs.

He knocks once, waits. He doesn't hear anything on the other side of the door.

"You lookin' for Anna?"

Kratos turns to Shera, who was toweling her straw-blonde hair dry. "Yes. I heard she wasn't feeling very well."

"I heard her in the bathroom. She sounded awful, but when I asked if she needed anything, she said no."

That didn't surprise him. Anna's stubbornness could be astounding sometimes. "I'm sure she did."

Shera wished him good luck before starting back towards her room. Kratos walked to the door of the women's restrooms, knocking and listening. All he heard were sounds of retching and he was forcing the locked doorknob open the next instant.

"Anna?"

There was no reply, but the vomiting continued and Kratos didn't have to look far to find her. She was standing over the sand, looking fairly miserable with her hair hanging lank around her face.

Kratos put the plate of food on the counter as he hurried to her. "Are you sick?"

Anna wiped her mouth, grimacing. "No, but it feels like it."  
Kratos frowned, tucking the stray locks of hair out of her face. "You're going to have to explain that one to me."  
Anna washed out the sink, nose wrinkling at the smell, before washing her face. She waited to see if her stomach decided to expel anymore of her dinner, but when nothing happened, she sighed, partially in relief. "

"Before I say anything…promise you won't get mad."

Kratos looked at her, puzzled. "Alright."

"…I'm pregnant."

She doesn't hear anything, not even a breath_ (Not that Kratos needed to breathe, but she's knows he usually does)_ so she looks up into the mirror to make sure he hasn't used some of that incredible speed of his to vanish on her. He hasn't.

"…Did you hear me?"

"I did." Kratos paused. "So you went to the medical ward by yourself?"

"Technically." Anna turned so she could lean so her back was against the counter, her palms leaning against it. "It was right after the Desian raid and Yuan had some X-rays of my ribs as a just in case measure. He called me back and told me I was pregnant."

"…I don't know what to say."

Anna chuckled a little breathlessly. "I know the feeling." A few heartbeats of silence. "I don't think I can handle a baby. I mean, it's a whole other person and I've just started putting my life back together. And I'm supposed to give birth to this…kid? Raise it?"  
"For one," Kratos said, gently drawing her closer so she was leaning on him, head on his shoulder. "You won't be doing it alone."

"You know a lot about babies?" She said a little doubtfully.

Kratos chuckled. "No. Almost nothing, in fact. But we have people who can help us. We'll figure it out."

Anna smiled at him. "By chance, do you know anything to stop the morning sickness?"

"Unfortunately not. Hopefully it doesn't last very long."

"Hopefully. I'm tired of running all the way down the hall every other morning just to make it to the sink."

"That's what all that running is in the morning. I had wondered."

Anna pushed herself off the counter. "You going leave so I can take a shower?"

"Alright, alright. Do you want the breakfast?"

"Sure, why not?" Just as Kratos was about to close the door behind him, Anna called him back, smiling. "Hey…you're a father."

The word felt heavy and loaded with responsibility. Not that Kratos had ever really been irresponsible, but always for himself or for adults. Never for a child, for _his_ child.

"…I guess I am."

-/-/-/-

Yuan guessed what had happened the moment Kratos walked in. "She told you."  
"Yes, she told me." Kratos said, pacing the length of the room. "Why didn't you?"

"It was her news."

Yuan watched Kratos pace for almost two minutes before Kratos turned to look at him. "Do you think we can do it?"

"What?"

"Be parents."  
Yuan could have lied, could have said 'Yes, absolutely.' And had it been anyone else, perhaps he would have. But he's known Kratos too long now and Kratos had done the same thing for him centuries ago_ (…I'm thinking about…marry me…think she'll say yes?)_

So he says, "You won't win any awards, but I think you'll do alright."

Kratos sighs. "You have more faith than I do."

"That's because I know you better than you do."


	30. Chapter 30

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Finished my dummy for my midterm project. Originally, it was supposed to be doing Thriller, but we couldn't get it to stand on its own, so we stuck him in a wheelchair and he's reading a book. Handicaps are people too.

Watched the Indiana Jones movies while making the dummy. I forgot how awesome they are. Saw a beautiful drive-thru Nativity at a local church. Just beautiful.

Ah, and I have no idea if the strawberry thing works. It was just what I was snacking on all morning.

I am officially seventeen years old as of Friday. :) Happy holidays everyone and Happy New Year. Let's make 2011 an interesting year.

-/-/

_Where we love is home,  
Home that our feet may leave, but not our hearts.  
~Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.,____**Homesick in Heaven**_

-/-/

"These psychological evaluations of yours, how've they been going?" Anna asks Yuan over dinner.

Her nose wrinkles at the meager amount of food on her plate—really, how could she not be more hungry? Her mind answers that she doesn't want to vomit it all up in the morning and she'll make up for it with a large lunch. Eating a large breakfast before sparring would only have her at the sink again—but eats anyway.

Perhaps something shows on her face, because Yuan says, "It goes away after a month or two."

"Thank heavens for that. But you didn't answer my question."

"So far, nothing even remotely traitorous. And I've examined almost everyone."

"So, in other words, you lost a lead as to how they found us."

"In other words."

Anna chewed on her bite of bread thoughtfully. "Didn't you say that magic leaves traces?" Yuan nodded, not sure where she was going with this. "And magitechnology uses magic?"

Yuan shook his head. "No. It simulates it. It's a human invention to try and keep up with the elves."

"There goes my idea. I thought that perhaps they'd tracked the magitechnology signature since it's so rare in Sylvarant."

"That's not a bad idea."

"I thought you said it's impossible since magitechnology doesn't leave traces."

"I never said that. I said it doesn't leave magical traces." Yuan stands up abruptly, placing his plate and glass in the sink before leaving the room.

"What did you do?" Kratos asked, sitting. "He nearly ran me over, he was in such a hurry."

"I just suggested that maybe the Desians used the trace left behind by magitechnology to find us and then he went off running."

Kratos frowned, not understanding, but then, Yuan had always been better with technology than he. Botta came in three seconds later, asking the same question Kratos had and Anna gave the same answer.

Botta, however, seemed to understand better than Kratos, but before he left, he looked at Anna and said, "Have some strawberries with salt."

"Why?"  
Botta shrugged. "It's why mother ate when she was pregnant with my younger siblings. She said it helped with the sickness when I asked."  
Anna wants to ask Botta if his mother is still alive back in Palmacosta—she's very nearly desperate for some unbiased advice or help or _anything_—but she stops herself. Botta was in the Renegades for a reason, after all.

"I'll try it." Anna promises. Any chance that something could lessen the sickness, she'd take it. Especially if it tasted as good as strawberries.

"Strawberries with salt." Kratos said, gulping down some ale. "A seaside tradition it must be."

"We had it back home in Luin too. I think." Anna still can't remember very well. "We ate them right after harvest."

"There weren't many strawberries where I was growing up." Kratos says, buttering a piece of bread. "Potatoes and corn, mostly. Some rice and wheat. Nothing really sweet. But I remember that, growing up, there was potato in almost everything. Stew, pie, salads, they all had it."

Anna grinned. "What about tomatoes?"

The look on Kratos' face makes Anna nearly choke on her draught of tea. Another thing she was told she couldn't do while she was pregnant—drink. She wouldn't have minded that normally. She wasn't much of a drinker, but after she'd been throwing up for an hour, a tall glass of ale would've been most welcome.

Anna stands to get the strawberries from the cold box and grabs a small plate. She puts enough salt on the plate so that it made a small mountain and dips the tip of the strawberry in the salt before eating it. She remembers that Nolan used to think she was crazy for liking strawberries dipped in salt, but Anna's always liked her food like that. With something a little contrary about it.

Like she liked her men, she thinks suddenly and she can't help but laugh aloud. Kratos eyes her curiously, but doesn't comment. Perhaps he's getting to know her too well or he's erring on the side of caution.

But it was true. Kratos is the most contrary of any man she's ever met. Quiet, rough, seemingly uncaring and yet he went out of his way to help people he'd never met.

Even the other men in her life were like that. Yuan, with his careless sarcasm and sharp tongue that brought breakfast up the mornings of her pregnancy before Kratos was told. Who still wore his wedding ring and watched out for everyone, regardless of whether or not he actually liked them or not.

Botta, who had, on some occasions, been known to speak even less than Kratos, who was quietly optimistic and loyal. Who'd been around books since he was born—his family having lived in an apartment near the Palmacosta Academy—and yet still preferred the clean, simple lines of battle to any scholarly pursuit.

Jayson, quick to grin and clumsy with technology, had bested Yuan and Kratos more than once in games of chess, though overall, the seraphim were still up a few wins. Who teased his sister mercilessly and yet was constantly looking out for her. Who was such a good shot and yet froze at death.

"What's got that look on your face?" Kratos asked, watching her intently.

Anna blinks out of her thoughts, half-eaten strawberry still in her hand. "Just thinking, that's all."

"Some interesting thoughts they must be."  
Anna smiles at him. "Absolutely."

"A gald for those thoughts, then." Jayson says as he comes into the room, plucking a strawberry from her bowl as he goes by.

"As if my thoughts could be so cheap." Anna scoffs, but she's still smiling.

Jayson grins at her. "I forget. You're one of them high-class ladies. I gotta treat you proper. Oh, and Yuan was askin' for the both of you."

-/-/-/-

"You going to explain why you went runnin' up here like Hell itself was after you?" Anna asks as soon as they're in the room.

Yuan's hands don't stop flying across the keyboard and his eyes don't leave the screen. "You said something about a trace."

"Uh-huh…you're going to have to elaborate on that. We're not mind-reader's y'know."  
"I'm not speaking literally. I hadn't thought of it before, but when you mentioned the trace, I realized that perhaps we were leaving traces in the Cruxis mainframe when we hack in like we do."

"And if someone technologically intelligent like Kvar found out about it," Kratos began.  
"Then he can follow the trace back to our mainframe and must have somehow been able to triangulate our position after finding where else we'd hit."

"Do they have permanent access to the information?" Kratos asked, looking at the screen to try and make some sense of it, but he'd never been quite as savvy with technology as Yuan and all he saw was a mass of numbers.

"I'm not sure, but I'm not about to let the possibility stay out there for much longer."

"You can remove the trace we leave behind?"  
"Yes, but it might not do much good. They could be on their way here right now for all we know."

"If they are, then we need to evacuate."

"And go where?" Yuan demanded. "Even if we went to the Flanoir base, it would be packed." Yuan knows what Kratos' next suggestion is before he says it. "I can't allow them to be spread out into Tethe'alla like that."

"Prejudice aside, we don't have the resources to get everyone squared away so quickly."

"Exire." Botta spoke up. He'd been so quiet until now that Anna had forgotten he was there. "A good portion of us can fit there and there won't be many questions."

Kratos shook his head. "That will be one of the first places Yggdrasill would look if Kvar tells him that the base has been abandoned. At best, perhaps ten of us can hide there."

"Meltokio's slums can house some of us. It won't be comfortable and it won't be easy, but no one will think to look for us there." Yuan suggested.

"That idea still has some merit, but the problem still remains that there are too many of us."

"The Flanoir base can still hide some of us and perhaps a few of Flanoir's abandoned buildings." Botta said.

"Palmacosta's busy and remote enough that a group of us could hide there." Anna pointed out.

"And some of us could go to Hima, but that would only take care of about five people."

"What about the forest?" Everyone turned to Jayson who was standing in the door. "Gaoracchia Forest. That place is like a maze. If we set up somewhere deep enough, we could hide there for months."

"He has a point." Yuan agreed.

"But the children can't stay there." Anna argued. "The people who can't defend themselves, mothers and their kids should stay somewhere else. There's monsters in Gaoracchia, aren't there? Ones not controlled by Cruxis?"

"You're right." Yuan ran a hand through his hair. "And Yggdrasill will probably do a thorough search of all the cities when no one's found."

"And at that point, there's little purpose in staying hidden." Kratos stared at the screen, the numbers blurring into each other. "The Temples."

"What temples?" Jayson, Anna and Botta asked simultaneously.

"The Temples of the Summon Spirits." Yuan answered. "Very remote places, usually and they have natural defenses. The monsters shouldn't bother you too much and Yggdrasill is arrogant enough to think that no one would dare go."

"Especially since the oracle for the Chosen isn't set to come for at least another decade."

"Undine, Gnome and the Sylph are the safest bets."

"D'ya really think it's such a good idea to have everyone in such large groups like that?" Dirk came in, sat on a low stool and watched the seraphim intently. "It'll be difficult ta maneuver and keep track o' everyone."  
"What's your suggestion?"

"My first one is the mines, but they be full of monsters these days. Use all of the available places. We all split up and hide until the air's clear."

"That's _too_ widespread." Botta argued. "We'd have no way to keep track of everyone."

"And if can't find 'em, neither can Cruxis." Dirk retorted.

"Stop arguing, the both of you." Yuan didn't yell—in fact, Anna can't remember him ever raising his voice in anger—but he didn't have to. She couldn't tell you what, exactly, changed about his voice at times like these, but there was no arguing with that tone. "We'll split up and we'll find a way to contact everyone once it's clear."

-/-/-/-

The base is a flurry of activity. Not panic, really, but everyone was dashing back and forth trying to get things they needed—no one was sure how long they were going to be gone after all.

Once everyone has their things together, Yuan stands on a chair in the Rheiard hangar. "This is how it's going to go. Each of the Temple's can take about twenty of us," The Temple's could hold much more, but Yuan isn't about to push their luck. "The slums can take about ten. Same with Exire. A good thirty of us are going into the Gaoracchia Forest. If you don't like the dark and you can't take care of yourself in a fight, don't end up one of those thirty. Ten of you are going to Palmacosta. It's a big city and it's busy enough that hopefully no one will notice a few travelers. The rest of you are going to stay in the Flanoir base. Make sure you all have everything you need because the inter-dimensional transfer system is going to be destroyed, just in case."

"And how will we know when to come back?" Someone called.

Not _if_ they came back, but _when_. They had no doubt that they would, no doubt that Yuan could get them out of this mess. Sometimes, that loyalty is rather daunting and Yuan isn't entirely sure he deserves it. What if he failed them? What if he really _couldn't_ get them out of this royal mess?

Yuan banished those thoughts from his mind. Doubt and fear could end up destroying all of this and they'd come too far for this to fall short now.

Yuan has to remind himself that he told himself that he wouldn't lie to his people. "We haven't figured that part out yet. But word _will _come, one way or another."

Everyone is murmuring and nodding, already instinctively making their own groups. Yuan wants to say good luck, wants to promise that of course everyone will come back, that this was home and how could they ever abandon it? But he doesn't. Yuan didn't make promises he wasn't sure he could keep.

As Yuan hops off of the chair, Jayson grabs his arm. "We won't go back. Not to the slums." He says lowly.

"'We' being…?"

"Shera an' me."

"I thought as much. You don't have to go back. In fact, it's probably better that we don't go back to places where people'll know us."

Jayson visibly relaxed at his words. It wasn't that they couldn't survive the slums. They'd done it once, after all. But Jayson had been working since he was a kid to get Shera out of there and he'd be damned if she was going back.

_(She'd asked him about it once, why he wanted so badly to get out of the slums. Jayson remembers looking down at his six year old sister and smiling at her, tucking a lock of her dirty blonde curls behind her ear. "You're too pretty for this place, sweetling. You deserve something better."_

_ Shera's lips had twisted into that smile that Jayson had known, even then, meant trouble. It was stubborn and charming and absolutely _Shera_. "Only if you come with me." Was all she'd said.)_

-/-/-/-

It took nearly all day to get everyone out of the base. They didn't, as of yet, have enough Rheairds for everyone, after all.

Yuan stared around at the emptiness of the hangar and felt all too uncomfortable. He'd become accustomed to the constant noise of the base. Even when he used only a portion of the potential of his senses, as he usually did otherwise he was very likely to go mad from all the sensations filling his mind at once, he'd still been able to hear almost every voice, every footstep. He'd been able to smell the oil from the machines, the perfumes of the women, the food from the kitchens. He'd gotten used to seeing teenagers running up the stairs and sliding down banisters, to checking in on the infants in their cribs when Shera was asleep and to sitting with everyone at dinner most nights.

It was an abrupt change to hear such silence other than the sounds of Kratos, Anna and Dirk's breathing, to feel nothing in the air other than the gentle electricity of the machines. Yuan thinks he might be getting in too deep this time. Perhaps he's caring too much and what happens when more of them get killed? Not when. Can't be when. _If_ more people got killed._ (He can't forget the thirteen graves, can't forget the names and faces and lives that went with those graves. Sometimes, he wishes he could.)_

"Where are you going to go?" Anna asked him in that blunt way of hers. There's something different in her eyes when Yuan looks at her, something a little older, a little wiser and he can't help but be a little unsettled by it. _(He doesn't want to think deep into it, doesn't want to think about the fact that he was unsettled by growth and change)_

"I haven't figured that part out yet."

Anna smiled slightly. "Seems there's a lot of figuring you haven't done lately."

"Seems like it. And you all? Where are you headed?"

Dirk was the first to answer. "Underground." He said it like it was so simple, so obvious. "They won't be findin' me down there."

"You're forgetting that we had the hardest time tracking you down before." Anna reminds him. "How're we gonna find you again?"

"I won't be leavin' the area." Dirk promises. "It's too cold around Hima at this time of year." It's a lie, they all know it. Dirk has grown to love the Renegades, as they all had. 'A fitting place for misfits', Shera had said one time to Anna.

And they were certainly misfits, Anna thought wryly. In this room alone, there were two rebel seraphim, one dwarf on the run, one ranch escapee, a protozoan and a partridge in a pear tree.

"And you two?" Yuan looks at Anna and Kratos.

They both shrug. "Travel around some." Anna says. "Safest place for us is on the run anyway. We're both wanted."

"Not in Tethe'alla."

"They'll search Tethe'alla and we stand out."

Yuan couldn't deny that. Even Anna, while she was pretty in a girl-next-door sort of way, wouldn't be able to hide her accent and she couldn't keep making up stories about the Exsphere. And Kratos…how could he not stand out?

Dirk cleared his throat. "Best be goin'. If they're on their way, they'll be here soon."

The others nodded and watched the dwarf leave. They stood in silence for long moments, no one wanting to leave. This place had become a safe haven. Had become home.

Finally, Noishe, never one to stay still for very long, padded across the room and looked back at them. Anna sighed and hefted her pack. "Are you staying behind, Yuan?"

The half-elf nodded. "I have to destroy the inter-dimensional transfer system to make sure they can't follow the others to the Flanoir base."

Anna smiled fondly. "And you worked so hard on that."

Yuan returned the smile. "Believe me, I'm not forgetting the plans for this technology any time soon. I refuse to do all that work again."

Anna and Kratos chuckled. "Good luck." Anna told him.

"Same to you. And please, Anna, don't go getting yourself in trouble again."

"You say that as if I have a choice!"

"You do have a choice." Yuan pointed out. "But I'm reminding you that you've got more than just yourself to worry about now."

Anna glanced down at herself. There wasn't any visible evidence of the pregnancy, not yet, but she's sure it's only a matter of time. Eight months, Anna reminds herself. She had eight months before whoever was inside her was born and then the really hard part came. Somehow, Anna can't picture raising this kid without the other Renegades. Even in the vaguest of plans when she was still processing the news, they'd been there in the background.

Anna reminds herself that this isn't a forever thing. She'd come back to the base. They all would, all of the Renegades. They'd come back and they'd all celebrate with a night of drinks and story-telling. Anna doesn't want to imagine it any differently.


	31. Chapter 31

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Hope everyone had an awesome holiday. I got me a laptop—I can finally get more work done—and an Xbox 360. I'm not really a big Xbox fan, but I have fallen in love with Assassin's Creed 2, which is why I didn't work on this for like three days. I was in my Hermit Gamer Mode. But, unfortunately, I've beaten it and I really want to play Brotherhood, but I have to wait until my brother is finished with it.

Hope everyone had a good holiday and that everyone has a New Year's Eve full of family, friends, drinking and embarrassing stories that you really wish you'd forgotten. :)

-/-/

_We anarchists do not want to emancipate the people; we want the people to emancipate themselves. ~Errico Malatesta, __**l'Agitazione**__, 18 June 1897  
_

-/-/

It should feel strange to be on the road again after so long, but they fall back into their rhythm seamlessly. Anna is aware of Kratos' constant eye on her. She knows it's for her own good—she _is _pregnant, after all—but that didn't mean she was an invalid. Noishe is more protective too, always staying nearby and keeping an eye on her. Between the two males, Anna is sure that she's the most protected person currently in existence.

They stop in Iselia first. It was remote enough that the Desians weren't likely to find them and it got enough news that they might hear about any of the other Renegades.

Anna likes Iselia the moment she steps into the village. The buildings remind her of Luin, as does the air, moistened as it is by the nearby ocean. The people are farmers and they allow her and Kratos to enter with minimal suspicion.

They're sitting at one of the inn's tables for dinner when a couple walks in the door. They chatted with the innkeeper, whose inn also doubled as a market, before Kratos said quietly enough so that only Anna could hear him, "Those two are the parents of the next Chosen."

Anna is startled enough to nearly drop her fork, though she manages to catch it before it hits the ground. "You're joking."

Kratos shakes his head before taking a bite of the meat loaf. He remembers seeing their files in the Cruxis database. Anna reaches across and steals the tomatoes from his plate. Regardless of his unfounded hatred for them, Anna was rather fond of them. She glances at the couple, studying them.

The man is handsome enough, she supposes, in a very plain sort of way. His blonde hair was cut messily short and his eyes are the brown of the healthy soil that Iselia used to farm. His arm is around the woman's waist and they look comfortable together.

The woman is blonde as well, with curls that bounce a little every time she shifts her weight. Her eyes are a very clear blue, like the way Luin's lake looked during the middle of summer. The two could've belonged anywhere, could've been anyone, but—if Kratos was to be believed—the woman was going to give birth to the next Chosen.

"This is crazy." Anna muttered. Kratos' brow furrowed in confusion. Anna glanced up, saw his expression. "Everything. Everything that you guys did, that Cruxis did…it's crazy."

Anna never allows Kratos to forget that he was partially at fault for the current state of the worlds without blaming him for it. It's a strange balance and Kratos is grateful for it. He doesn't wish to forget that this was his fault, that he was responsible.

"…I don't think we were entirely sane at the time." In fact, Kratos is almost sure of it. Yuan may have been the one who had married Martel, but it had been all too easy for everyone to love her. Mithos' world had not been the only one to crumble that day.

"Sometimes, I don't think you're entirely sane now." Anna says dryly. She's capable of doing things like that, Kratos thinks. Making light of a terrible situation.

"The same can be said for you." Kratos replies and it makes her laugh. Kratos had said it only partially joking. What was that old saying, half in jest, all in seriousness? She'd had the courage to march up to Yggdrasill and chew him out. Surely, she was a little less than sane.

The couple is out the door, their arms full of groceries and Kratos hears them jump. "What is that thing?" The woman asks.

Anna must have heard her too because she stands up. "I'll calm 'em down."  
Noishe is looking perfectly nonthreatening, lying just outside the door—like the good guard dog that he pretends to be, Anna muses—his eyes half-lidded as he watches the village. Admittedly, he was the size of a large wolf and Anna's betting that not many monsters get very close to the village_ (Or rather, no monsters were allowed near the village where the Chosen would be born and raised_.)

She smiles at the couple. "Sorry if he scared ya."

"What is he?" The man asks.

Anna blanks out rather neatly at the question and can appreciate Kratos having trouble finding something to call him. "He's a dog, of course." Anna says, stealing a page from Kratos' book. "And don't worry. He's a sweetheart."

The woman eyed Noishe warily. "Oh really?"

"Yeah." Anna knelt beside Noishe and scratched his ears, kissing his forehead. "He's just a real big teddy bear." She's sure she can hear Kratos snorting inside. A teddy bear. _Right_. Anna thinks it better not to mention that she's seen Noishe break men's bones between those jaws of his.

"Is he yours?"

"Technically. He found my husband and I while we were travelling and I guess he forgot to leave."

"He looks wild." The man said, still eyeing Noishe with some suspicion. "He hasn't hurt you or your husband at all?"

"Not once." And it wasn't a lie, at least on her part. Whether Noishe had ever bitten Kratos was one of those details that tended to get washed away in four thousand plus years of memories.

"He's a strange dog."

"I can't deny that." Noishe whuffed and nudged his nose against her hand.

The inn door opened and closed. "Are you ready to get going…honey?"

Anna makes a mental note to tease him for that later, even though she knows it's dangerous to use her real name in Sylvarant. She stands and Noishe rises with her. "Sure thing, pumpkin."

She sees the slight thinning of his lips and when Noishe barks, it sounds like laughter. Once Anna realized that she'd thought that, she thinks that she's known these males entirely too long.

The couple bids them goodbye as they walk away in the other direction. Kratos' arm wraps around her waist and his voice is low in her ear. "Pumpkin?"

Anna grins sideways at him. "I couldn't resist. Besides, you're one to talk, _honey_."

Noishe barks another laugh and Kratos send him a sideways glare. Traitor.

"So no staying in Iselia then?" Anna hadn't been expecting to, but it would've been nice.

"Too dangerous still. Iselia Forest is a safer place, sadly enough."

"Monsters there?"

"A minimal amount of them, but yes."

Anna frowned as she recalled the maps that had been pinned up to the walls of the base. "Isn't the Iselia Ranch in there?"

"Yes."

Anna turned to look at Kratos' profile. "What aren't you telling me?"

"Nothing."

"That's what you are telling me. What're you leaving out? You wouldn't risk going so near a ranch without some kind of reason behind it." Anna knows that she's one of the few that knew anything of Kratos Before, that knew _personal_ things. She knows that Kratos is naturally a secretive person and sometimes that comes back out to play. Does it annoy her? A bit. Can she live with it? Sure.

"There was news. In Iselia."

Anna started and whipped her body around so they were face-to-face. "_What?_ What news?"  
"…Apparently, Desians were marching out towards the desert a day and a half ago." Anna flinches a little. That had only been half a day after they'd left. "There's been no sign of their return."

"…You're leaving something out again." And this was the part that sparked a little anger in her. This was the fate of their friends that they were talking about and still he withheld information!

"There was talk of prisoners taken."

"Were they ours?"

"No one knows."

Of course no one knew. If ordinary people saw a Renegade, how could they tell? The innkeeper, that couple, they had looked Anna right in the eye, had probably seen the scar on her cheek, and had still treated her as they would any other traveller.

"And if they were ours?"

Kratos understood what she intended to do before she told him. "We can't break them out."

"No…we won't break them out."

"We don't have the manpower to do it even if we were going to." Two people and a protozoan couldn't break into a Desian Ranch and get people out undetected.

"There has to be some way of finding out if our people got captured." Anna said thoughtfully. "What's the terrain like near the ranch?"

"You're joking." But Kratos should know by now that when Anna says something a little less than sane, she was never joking.

-/-/-/-

Anna can be surprisingly fearless. The ranch was nestled on an outlying cliff at the base of higher cliff walls. Anna had clambered, climbed and hopped across from a tree onto the cliff and across until there was a large enough ledge that she could plant her feet.

"You're insane." Kratos tells her. It doesn't take him more than a moment to catch up with her. He'd even offered to fly her up there if she was truly that determined, but, Anna argued, that might get them seen and wasn't discretion the whole point?

She flashes him an unapologetic grin before she continues scanning the yard for familiar faces. And there are more than she'd thought there'd be, but no Renegades so far. All of the familiar faces, about a dozen of them, were in the Asgard Ranch with her.

Kratos sees the look on her face. "What?"

"Did you hear anything about a prisoner transfer?"

"A prisoner transfer? There've been several. Why?"

"Because there are at least ten people down there that were in the ranch with me. Is Kvar not being trusted anymore?"

"He hasn't been told that he isn't. With all of the breakouts, it only makes sense that the more important prisoners get moved to higher security ranches."

"This doesn't seem so high security to me."

"That's because you haven't seen the inside. Lasers and multiple floors with hallways leading to a room with nothing in it."

"I'd call them paranoid, but considering all the breakouts, they're really not."

They both freeze as they hear a familiar voice shouting.

There's a kid breaking free from one of the Desians and scrambling up the stairs out into the yard. "You sons of bitches won't get me!"

It was Hassan, brave kid that he was. Kratos can see the bruises and the cuts on his face, but apparently, that hadn't lessened his spirit any.

"Kid," One of the Desians was saying, "There's no way out. You're gonna be trapped here 'til you die."

Hassan snorted. "When the sun shines in Hell."

The other prisoners were watching him cautiously. Anna wonders why—shouldn't they be joining in this rebellion rather than just watching idly?—when she remembers the very hopelessness that pervaded ranches. She remembers the second time that she'd been stuffed into the Asgard Ranch that a small group of timidly cautious prisoners had asked her what they had to do to break out.

Anna remembered having to think about it. They had told her their plan. She could have told them that it wouldn't work, that their concern for each other would destroy them, that there were crueler ways for them to be enslaved.

She could have told them.

And yet when she finally answered, having thought about it for a good minute or two, she simply said, "Sacrifice everything." She'd meant it. Hadn't the Renegades sacrificed everything to stay free of Desian control? Hadn't they given up their homes, their families, their very livelihoods for this? Hadn't Kratos and Yuan been sacrificing things for centuries, hadn't they finally sacrificed everything for this chance to bring down Cruxis?

The Desians went for Hassan. They went with whips and guns and the next thing Anna knew, the air was blazing. Flames melted their guns, disintegrated their whips. Hassan was glancing between his hands and the Desians, as if unable to believe that it was his fault that all that had happened.

"Did he just-?"Anna asked.

Kratos doesn't answer. Elves—with their long life spans—often learned magic slowly, decade by decade. Their magic was stable, was connected to nature. Half-elves, with the human element mixing with their blood, trying to neutralize the magic, made casting it very unstable. The first thing half-elves learned about magic was control. It was the first lesson and the last.

But like all magic, regardless of race, there were times when the magic could no longer be contained and control was a thing of the past. As far as Kratos was aware, Hassan was no prodigy with magic. He was no genius, had no particular talent with it. This had simply been that uncontrollable moment.

Hassan broke himself from his shock and bolted for the gate. He ducked the guards and crawled beneath the locked gate. He was still scrawny, had not yet grown into his frame. Scrabbling to his feet, he ran for the forest. _(Never look back, can't look back. Not ever. They'll catch you if you do)_

Kratos hopped silently down the cliff and yanked the boy-man up by his collar when he ran by. When he immediately began to struggle, Kratos clapped a hand over his mouth. "Hush up. It's us."

Recognizing the voice, and not quite believing that it was him, Hassan stopped struggling as Kratos climbed back up to Anna and set him down. Anna smiled at him, but her sharp eyes were on the Desians below.

"The kid couldn't've disappeared into thin air." One was saying.

"'M gonna kill that kid." The other said, cradling a badly burnt hand.

A low growling seemed to vibrate through everyone's bones. Anna and Hassan frowned at Kratos, confused since he didn't seem very surprised, and then Anna figured it out. She glanced down and found that she was right.

Noishe's teeth were bared in a snarl, every movement that of a predator. A teddy bear, Anna had told the couple. She couldn't have been further from the truth.

"What the hell is this?" The burnt one says. "I ain't never seen a monster like that before."

"Does it matter?" The other one raises a gun and aims it right at Noishe. Anna must have made some movement towards them—she was_ not_ about to let them shoot Noishe—because Kratos' hand is around her wrist and pulling her back. _He'll be fine_, the red-tinted eyes say.

Noishe bounds at the Desian and his jaws clamp around his gun arm with a sickening _crack._ The Desian cries out, his hand spasms and drops the gun. The other one, the one with the burnt hand is automatically raising his own gun, but Noishe was too fast for him. The Desian's neck snapped easily between Noishe's teeth.

The first Desian is whimpering a little, cradling his arm close. Noishe snarls and the Desian is scrambling to his feet as best he can, bolting for the ranch.

The three still up on the ledge wait until Kratos can't hear the man's footsteps before they climb down. Anna thinks that she should be a little afraid, if only instinctively, of the protozoan with blood on his muzzle and something feral is still in the edges of his eyes. She isn't afraid. Not at all.

She ruffles his fur and tells him that he's brilliant. The feral edge leaks away slowly and that human-like intelligence is there once more.

Hassan looks at them, also completely unafraid of the protozoan. What a messed up trio they made, Anna mused. But then, they were Renegades, so perhaps that made it alright. "Where to now?"

"You're not coming with us." Kratos tells him.

Hassan doesn't question the why's of Kratos. He is unlike many teenagers in that way. "Then where should I go? They won't trust me in Iselia and to get ta Triet I'd hafta go through Desian territory."

Kratos draws up a mental map of Sylvarant. "You can come with us as far as the House of Salvation." Kratos didn't want to be responsible for someone else. He knows that, if both Anna and Hassan were in mortal peril, he'd rescue Anna first without a second thought and he won't have a child's blood on his hands_ (Even though Hassan isn't really a child. Not even as much of a child as he was a year ago. But to Kratos, everyone could be considered a child)_

-/-/-/-

It's been a long time since he was really _in_ Tethe'alla. The Flanoir base didn't really count. To Yuan, the bases were neutral ground.

He's careful to make sure he's as inconspicuous as possible. Half-elves were the lowest on the social caste here and, if he was careful, he could pass for human. Not elven. His mother's genes weren't as strong in him. His eyes weren't quite slanted or wide enough, his ears not pointed enough. He was just a little too stocky and when he talked, he sounded very human. Or so he'd been told whenever he interacted with elves.

There are new towns in Tethe'alla. The village of Ozette, small as it was, was one that hurt, just a little, to see. It was a tree town, a blend of nature and civilization that was as close to elven architecture as they could get and yet the prejudice there was nearly palpable in the air. And it was a lovely town, really.

Yuan doesn't visit Mizuho, despite his liking for their culture. Even Cruxis more or less left Mizuho alone, they were so isolated.

He does visit Meltokio and walks the streets as little more than a shadow. Meltokio reminds him of the ancient human capital. It had looked very much like this, with brightly colored houses with flowerboxes in the windowsills and trimmed with carved framework. The bold shopfronts and cobblestone streets. Its open square on the Coliseum level, the carefully maintained gardens and its flocks of songbirds.

Sometimes Yuan wonders if memories could be passed through generations. Meltokio was a young city—as far as cities went anyway—being only about seven hundred years old. Had the previous generations somehow had memories of the human capital? Had they begun to build Meltokio in the image of the shadow of those memories?

"What're you starin' at?" A young voice asked.

Yuan turns to look at the child and recognizes him almost instantly. Bright red hair, pale skin and ice blue eyes. Zelos Wilder, Tethe'alla's future Chosen. The boy was too young as he was now, his father being the current Chosen.

"The city." Yuan replies simply.

Zelos follows the line of his gaze. "'S a little borin'."

"I suppose it can be."

"I ain't-" His nose wrinkles. "I _haven't_ ever seen you 'round here before."

Yuan is sure that Proper Ways of Speaking had been the boy's most recent lesson and can remember a few of those lessons himself, remembers snickering at Kratos' annoyance with it. "I haven't been to Meltokio in a long time."

"You travel a lot?"  
"Oh yes."

"What's it like out there? It's not boring like here, is it?"

It strikes Yuan that the boy hasn't ever left Meltokio, might not ever leave for years to come until he was the Chosen and there wouldn't be much travelling for pleasure then. "Definitely not boring."

"I wanna-" Another nose wrinkle. "I _want to_ travel everywhere one day."

"I'm sure you will."

"You really think so?"

"Absolutely." Yuan understood the hunger to travel away from home all too well, but right now, he's wishing he _was_ home. Home at the base where there were arguments over dinner and the sounds of sparring in the morning.

"Zelos!"

Both of them turn towards the voice. The woman calling him is beautiful, her blonde wavy hair held back with a clip. Her gown is the color of spring roses and she carried herself with the grace of a queen. Yes, she was beautiful, but in the way that splintered ice and sea storms were beautiful.

"Mother fusses and worries too much."

"Appreciate her while you can." Yuan advises. Despite their many problems, Yuan still found himself missing his own mother once in a while.

Zelos eyes him strangely—he's intelligent, this boy, but the world had not yet tempered that intelligence—before bidding him goodbye and jogging to meet his mother.

-/-/-/-

"The world has changed."

"Did you expect something different?" The Storyteller asks, handing Yuan a mug of tea. "That is the nature of the world, to be in constant transformation."

Yuan sips at the tea. It's a little bitter and a little too hot, but he appreciates it just the same. "Perhaps. That doesn't change the fact that it still surprises me when I can see the changes. It would be like walking into your home and not recognizing much more than the base foundation."

The Storyteller considers the seraphim before him. Yuan and Kratos visited every century or so. They were good company, interesting when you got them to speak about the right subject. The Storyteller has gone through scrolls and scrolls of the stories printed on the mana leaf herb and while Yuan and Kratos are talked about in the story of Mithos the Hero, the story does not capture them in their full essence. Does not capture their dry sarcasm or the odd nature of their friendship. And yet, when the Storyteller attempts to put it into words for the future generations, he finds that he cannot find the words to describe them.

"That is because you do not interact with the world. You hide from it, you play on the sidelines, but you are not _in_ it."

"It's not my place anymore." Yuan looks at the old Storyteller and there is a strange sadness in his eyes. "I don't belong in the world. I tried, for the first few decades. But I don't. My job is to keep watch over this world, to protect it. After that job's over…well."

"You could rejoin if you wanted to."

"To watch the people I would grow to love age and die and begin the cycle all over again? I think not."

The Storyteller has heard this problem from many elves that have gone to live among humans. They want to because they love humans—the Storyteller doesn't entirely understand it, but he doesn't condemn them for it either—but there is always a cautiousness there, a wall that can never entirely come down.

"What brings you back to Tethe'alla?"

"I needed to get out." Yuan trusts the Storyteller, but only to a certain extent. There was no telling what Yggdrasill would be willing to do to catch the Renegades and there was always that chance that he might break his one rule and go to the elves.

"A very human trait. They're never content to simply stay in one place."

Yuan glances at him, but says nothing. He has never lived among the elves. He spent the first decade of his life among half-elves in Asgard—though it wasn't called that then—and then went to become a slave among humans. He's been in human and half-elf company his entire life. He has only ideas of how an elf acts.

"And where is Kratos? You two usually visit together."

Yuan shrugs. "I don't pretend to understand the way he thinks sometimes. I asked him to come, but he refused."

"Does he agree with you?"

"Agree with me about what?"

"About not rejoining the world."

Yuan has to think about that one. He knows Kratos wishes that he could. The times with Anna could attest to that, but Kratos wasn't the dreamer that he used to be. The world had twisted those dreams into realism and Kratos was practical enough to know that he could never do the white picket fence. Not even with someone like Anna.

"I don't know. I honestly don't."

-/-/-/-

"Think he'll be okay?" Anna asks once they're a good mile or two away from the House of Salvation.  
"He's a smart kid. He'll make it."  
"He wasn't alone when he left the base. D'you think the others in his group are still in the ranch?"

Kratos looked sideways at her. "…We can't go rescue them, Anna."

"I know." But that didn't mean she liked it. "So...I was thinking."

"A dangerous pastime."

Anna chuckles. "…Think we could pay Luin a visit?"

"Luin is very close to the ranch." He doesn't think she's forgotten—how could she?—but he's not entirely sure why she wants to go back.

"I know. But…I'm pregnant. Isn't…I mean, aren't you supposed to tell your parents that sort of thing?"

She knows what he's thinking and she has to agree to a certain point. That was the old life, the Before life. "The Desians are still very strong in that territory. No one can know we're there."

Anna thinks about it and notices that he didn't say no to going, simply to actually talking to people. "Think they'll recognize me?"

Kratos looks over her. He's been with her more or less every day since she escaped, so the changes in her are gradual, are small to him. To those who hadn't seen her since she was, what, thirteen? She must look like an entirely different person. Though Nolan had recognized her and he'd probably recognize Kratos.

But on the other hand, it wasn't as though they had any places to be. All they could do was hide until Yuan found some way to signal everyone to come home.

"I doubt it." He told her. "And if they do, you could just tell them that legend."

"What legend?"

"That everyone has a twin walking around somewhere in the world."

"I've never heard of that legend." Which wasn't saying much, really since she'd spent half her life rotting in a cell.

Kratos shrugged slightly. "It was something that my mother's friends used to say sometimes."

"Have I ever told you that you know or have known the weirdest people?"

His lips tilted in a smirk. "I know you, don't I?"

"Well, present company excluded, naturally."  
"Naturally."


	32. Chapter 32

**www.****Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **I was having some problems with my Internet connection and this chapter was having some trouble getting going along with the fact that midterms were this week, so that's why this is late.

I started learning capoeira which, for those of you who don't know, is a mix of Brazilian martial arts and dancing. It's hard—especially since I haven't done martial arts in upwards of about two/three years—and it involves a lot more flexibility than I'm used to, but it's a lot of fun even with all of its challenges.

Having a bit of 90's nostalgia as I write this and really wishing for summer. Usually, it's hard to tell the difference between summer and any other time of year down here in Florida, but it's been obscenely cold here lately, (For us at least) so it makes summer seem even farther away.

-/-/

"_As we do at such times I turned on my automatic pilot and went through the motions of normalcy on the outside, so that I could concentrate all my powers on surviving the near-mortal wound inside."_

_Sonia Johnson_

-/-/

The air is charged with the excitement that preceded the summertime. The days were growing drowsily hot and humid, the cicadas' song drifting through the night air. In Luin, especially, it's noticeable.

In the afternoon, immediately after school has been let out, the children are sprinting across the streets, their sandals making sharp _flip-flop_ sounds as they smack the ground. They chase each other through the streets, laugh as they climb up to the rooftops. They'll kick a ball back and forth across the fountain square, sometimes tackling each other playfully and other times having to fish the ball out from where it had been kicked into the fountain, until the sun begins to sink below the horizon and their parents are calling them inside for supper.

Summer announces itself in the adults by their sitting outside on their front porches—the ones who had them anyway and if they didn't, they simply used the street in front of them—and they'll play cards and drink ale while chatting about the day.

It seems timeless. Especially when Anna spots Nolan at one of the porch tables, laughing into his ale at something someone said, his daughter skipping rope with a few other girls nearby. It was an endless cycle, something that seemed like it would never end. Nolan's daughter would get older and one day she'd take her place at the adults' tables and her kids would be the ones playing hopscotch.

If Kratos notices anything strange about Anna's mood, he doesn't say anything. Simply hands her a chicken bun before sitting beside her on the bench. They've been here for nearly a week already and they had yet to be discovered. Anna said that it was because of the season. Tons of tourists came to Luin during the summer.

"Luin doesn't seem this full during the day." Kratos commented.

"That's because everyone's holed away in a building doing their day-work."

"As opposed to their night-work?" Kratos teased gently at the strange phrase.

Anna shoved him lightly with her shoulder, but stayed leaning against him. "There is no work at night. Everyone knows that."

Kratos chuckled. Luin was a very different town than the one he'd grown up in. There had been none of this there. No porch-gatherings, no ball games in the streets. Then again, those had been very different times. War-times. No one wanted to be out in the street more than they had to be because they believed that if they stayed in their homes, then the bombs wouldn't drop, wouldn't get them.

They both duck as a ball whizzes over their heads. There are shouts of apologies and sheepish chuckles from the kids.

"Sorry 'bout that." Anna and Kratos both look at the girl. Her dirty blonde hair is sweaty and tangled and half coming out of the ponytail that must have been neat this morning. Her knees are slightly scraped and dirty and there's a streak of mud across one cheek. She couldn't be more than seven years old. "The ball wasn't supposed to go that far."

Anna smiles at the girl she recognizes, vaguely, as her little sister. "It's fine. Go and keep having fun."

The girl—Cheryl was her name, if Kratos was remembering correctly—flashed them a bright, child-smile and jogs to join the others. There's a short discussion before the ball is back on the ground and being kicked around once again.

Kratos thinks that perhaps Anna was that bright once upon a time. Not that she isn't vibrant now, but she's darkbright, her teasing and her laughter forever tinged with the memories of what had been done to her.

Apparently, Anna had followed a similar train of thought. "Maybe I should buy something pink."

It took a minute for the sentence to properly communicate with Kratos' brain. "What?"

"I was just thinking that sometimes, I don't want to be like you and Yuan when I grow up." Kratos doesn't have anything to say to that. He and Yuan were well aware that being like them wasn't exactly a good thing. "And other times, I think that it's too late. That I'm already there. So I was thinking that maybe it would be a start if I bought something pink."

"Pink?" Kratos repeated.

"Yes, Kratos." Anna said, fondly exasperated. "Pink. Like cotton candy or bubble gum."

Kratos looked at her, an odd look in his eyes. "You, in something the color of cotton candy and bubble gum." He shook his head. "You're one of the least pink women I've ever met."

"I didn't start out that way." Anna's eyes go to Cheryl, laughing with the other kids. "I think, when I was a kid, I would've given a small body part for something like a princess dress."  
"Just trying to imagine you in a pink princess dress gives me a headache."

"I was pink once, Kratos."

"Everyone is. Well, most of us." Kratos amended. "Most of us start off soft, but you can't survive if you stay that way."

"Is that what happened to you?"  
"…Yes, it is." Kratos rolls up his left sleeve enough to be able to see the inside of his elbow. The scar there was faded and white, but it must have been a cruel wound once. The scar continued up his arm, hidden by the sleeve. "My father gave me this."

Anna's heart stutters a little at hearing that. "What?"

"I must have been…sixteen? About that age. There was some assembly at the military school, I can't remember what it was for," It's a lie. He can remember that day perfectly. He can remember the prisoner that was supposed to be presented, the prisoner that he and Yuan had broken out and they'd wanted to see the looks on the generals' faces when they found the prisoner missing. They'd wanted to give each other smug high fives under the table, wanted to celebrate that night with food stolen from the kitchen.

They never got the chance.

"Yuan noticed that they'd misspelled something on the banner and he accidently blurted it out. It was illegal for half-elves to learn to read or to teach one to read, so we were more or less hunted down by the entire school."

"I don't understand where your father comes into this."

"He was there that night for the assembly." It had been his prisoner, his great reward for getting him. "He was the one that ended up catching us. I managed to shove Yuan out the window and tell him to run before he actually caught up to us though. I wouldn't tell my father where Yuan was, so I was punished."

It's the bare details of that night, skittering over the events that actually happened. Kratos has never spoken of it to anyone.

Anna takes his arm and inspects the scar. "Kratos," She begins quietly. "…That isn't punishment. That's abuse."

"It never happened again."

"Is that when you left home?"

"After this healed, yes."

It's the skeleton of the story, the back cover of a paperback. Anna wants to ask, wants to hear all of the little details, wants to know the flesh of the story, but she doesn't because she can sense that this was an entirely new level of _personal_ and she doesn't think she's meant to pry here because it's a Kratos-and-Yuan _personal_ and it's something that belongs solely to them.

Anna eyes Kratos, a considering look on her face. "I can't imagine you soft."

He surprised her by chuckling a little. He kissed her lightly before telling her that pink wasn't her color.

-/-/-/- 

They can't very well spar in Luin—There would be too many questions, too many eyes on them—but it's difficult to break the habit of waking before the sun. Anna and Kratos have taken to lying in bed for the hours they have after waking until their natural restlessness urges them into movement.

They're nearly finished with the book—Kratos called it _A Princess and a Bride_—the one that he began reading to her in Flanoir. They'd decided that since they had a few extra hours every morning, why not finish it? He'd been right. It was much more than simply a romantic story, though there was that underlying element.

"So you always travel with that book?" Anna asked from the bathroom. She was at the sink, waiting for the usual morning sickness to come by. "Why?"

"It's a habit." Kratos replied as he pulled a shirt on.

"Strange habit."

Kratos couldn't deny that. It was one left over from the years when he and Yuan travelled together_ (He has a lot of habits still left over from those days, now that he thinks about it)_ and anything they wanted to keep with them, they carried. Sometimes, Kratos thinks that if he had a copy of the book small enough to fit in his pocket, he'd always keep it on him.

The next thing he knows, Anna's whooping in exhilarated laughter and she's hugging him tightly.

"What's happened?" Kratos asks, blinking at her in surprise.

Her face is lit up with excitement. "I'm not sick."

"Of course not."

"No, Kratos. I'm not _sick._"

He's not sure what to say, so the only thing that comes out of his mouth is, "Oh."

Anna laughs and tugs at his left hand. "C'mon."

"Where are we going?" He asks, allowing her to pull him out the door.

"To celebrate of course. I plan to pig out now that I know I'm not going to throw it all back up."

And pig out she does. On chicken stew and pork buns; greasy goose and ham sandwiches. Kratos only chuckles and is careful to stay across the table from her. He listens for any news, as he does every morning. They'd been here upwards of two weeks and, blessedly, there had been no news of the Renegades. Not that they really expected there to be. If they got captured, the Desians would keep it under wraps and if they weren't, the Renegades were excellent at blending in.

So when there is the measured tromping of boots outside, Kratos stiffens. Anna catches the tension in his posture and is immediately quiet. She looks like she's ready to either bolt or fight and with Anna, it was difficult to tell which one she was going to do.

When the door to the inn bursts open, slamming against the wall, they instinctively tried to make themselves look entirely inconspicuous. The Desians aren't en masse, as they'd been the day that Kratos had first kissed her. There were only these two and, if Kratos' hearing could be relied on, a few more pairs going around. Nothing they couldn't handle if push came to shove.

"We're looking for some people." One of the Desians said.

Anna wants to remark on that—oh, how she wanted to!—but she keeps her mouth shut, albeit with difficulty. The innkeeper, however, seemed to have her same tendency for speaking out. Maybe it was a Luin thing.

"Your kind are always lookin' for someone."

"These are two fugitives. A man and a woman. Have you seen them?"

Anna and Kratos keep casually tense, if such an oxymoron is possible. The innkeeper, however, doesn't sell them out like they'd expected. "There're tourists abound in these parts around this time o' year. You're going to have to be a bit more specific."

The Desian shifted uneasily. "We can't be more specific."

That almost makes Anna want to burst out laughing. As it is, she settles for rubbing the back of her hand against her mouth in an attempt to erase the smile that was tugging at her lips.

"Then get out of here. You're disrupting my business."

The Desians glare at the innkeeper before turning and leaving. Everyone in the room seems to let out a collective sigh of relief. Kratos leans in a bit to Anna. "Cleary, this ability to chew out people who have the power to kill you isn't yours alone."

That sent her laughing. "Yeah," She said with a grin. "I'm beginning to think it's a Luin trademark."

-/-/-/-

When Anna goes out to the market, she's careful of how she dresses. There's a short scarf tied in her hair, its ends trailing to her shoulder blades. She'd applied make-up to hide the scar on her cheek and—unfortunately for her—she'd gotten some loose skirts in interesting patterns. She almost considered wearing sleeves long enough to cover the back of her hand, but it was far too hot. It all makes her blend in and she's impossible to distinguish from any other woman in the market.

So when she sees her mother in line in front of her at the fruit stall, her heart nearly seizes. Her mother must have been a beautiful woman in her youth, but motherhood and hard times had lines her face and left her lightly plump.

Her mother turned back to her as the old woman in front of them searched her pockets for extra coins. "Old woman Babbelle does this every market day."

"Does she?" Anna doesn't recognize Babbelle, but then, it had been years.

"You're new in town?"

"Sort of. My husband and I are here for…our honeymoon." It had become an easy lie for her and Kratos to tell others that they were married. For all intents and purposes, they were anyway. Really, all they were missing were the rings and the vows.

"Congratulations! It's wonderful to be married, isn't it?"  
Anna can't remember her mother being so happy with the idea of marriage. Not that she'd ever hated it, but she'd never seemed so in love with the idea of love. Anna remembered her mother as an independent woman, who had related tales of how she'd never wanted to get married as a young woman until she met Anna's father and perhaps she still was that woman. It was just very different to talk to her as an adult that it had been as a teenager.

"Yes, I suppose so. It does take some getting used to though."

"Well, naturally. It took me months to get used to my husband. Sometimes, I still don't think that I am."

Anna chuckled. "People can be surprising."

"Your husband still surprises you." She said knowingly.

"I don't think he'll ever stop. But he's…predictable in that way, I guess. I can always count on him to be surprising."

Her mother laughed. "An interesting reasoning."

"Do you mind if I ask you a kind of personal question?"

"Sure. Go ahead."

"Do you have children?"  
Sadness touched her mother's eyes. "Yes. Two girls."

"…Is it difficult to be a mother?"

"Are you planning on having children?"

Anna snorts. "Too late for that and it wasn't planned, that's for sure."

"Congratulations, again." She smiles a little. "As for being a mother, it can be. It gets hard sometimes, but I think that it's incredible despite that."

"Really? So far, all that's happened is that I feel sick."

Her mother laughs and Anna has the strange sensation of seeing herself in the lines of her mother's face. "If it makes you feel any better, that doesn't last."

"The best news I've heard all day."

"Mama!"

They both turn at the voice. Cheryl is grinning wide, a daisy stuck in her hair, with a boy around her own age right beside her. "What is it?"

Both children began telling the story at the same time, but a few words in, they changed abruptly and there were so many proper nouns within the mile-a-minute talking that Anna couldn't follow. But apparently, her mother could because she smiled apologetically.

"I must be going. It was very nice talking to you."

Old woman Babelle moves out of the way with her purchases and Anna finds that there's a strange tugging at her heart and she's not quite sure what it is.

-/-/-/-

"I spoke to my mother today."

Kratos looks over at her as they walk. They were going to see Noishe, since they thought it best not to start a panic in Luin when people saw him_ (When and not if because it would be impossible to _not _notice him)_. Anna watched as Noishe bounded up to them and she's reminded that he isn't tame. He could act it, could behave when needed, but he wasn't tame. No tame animal moved like that.

There are specks of blood still on his muzzle, but Anna kisses him on the nose anyway. "Well apparently he hasn't lost that hunting instinct after all."

"A miracle in and of itself." Kratos scratched behind Noishe's long ears and Noishe's tongue snaked out to lick his wrist. "…And how was your mother?"

"She seemed pretty happy, actually."

"Then why don't you sound better about it?"

Anna shrugged. "I don't know. I think…that I miss the chance I could've had." Kratos frowns in confusion, but lets her finish. "For Sylvarant, Luin is a big town, but for the actual community, it's small. Everyone knows each other. I think I miss the fact that I could've been part of it."

"…I was never close with my parents. So when I traveled to the half-elf villages, I was always very surprised at just how close they all were. Everyone seemed to know everyone and they shared what little they had. It was strange to me and I remembered thinking much the same, that maybe I'd missed something, something important."  
They're anomalies; humans who had found a place among half-elves. Who had found a _family_ among half-elves. And they're perfectly okay with that.

-/-/-/-

"Anna." A gentle shake. "Anna."

She stirs and turns over a little to look at Kratos. "Whaz goin' on?"

"We have to get out of here."

She's alert in the next instant, throwing the blankets off and swinging her legs off the bed. "Why?"

"I heard footsteps."

Anna blinks up at him, even as she searches half-blindly under the bed for her boots. "…You do realize that there are a good couple of hundred people in Luin, right? And most if not all of them walk."

"These were enough footsteps, marching might I add, to make up a small army. And they were coming from the east." From the ranch, though it goes unsaid and understood.

They're getting all of their stuff together and Anna has the brief thought that, either the Desians were closer than she'd thought or that Kratos had extended his senses. She knows that he usually keeps the full brunt of his senses muted and even muted, his senses were still more sensitive than anyone else's.

"How far away are they?"  
"Still several miles. If we leave through Luin's west entrance, we could make it to Hima before the end of the week."

"Think they found out we're here?"

"Considering their numbers, they certainly suspect that we are."

"Not taking any chances then, huh?" Anna's grin was a flash of teeth in the darkness of the room.

"Not this time."


	33. Chapter 33

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **Midterms are finally _over_. The third marking period starts next week and then I'm back to the dreadful world of Algebra 2 and Spanish class.

On the bittersweet note, the Borders at the local mall is closing, so everything is at least 50% off and while that's great for me, it also means that I've got one less bookstore to shop at. It's a sad, sad world we live in when entire bookstore chains are going bankrupt.

Didn't quite know what to do for this chapter, but it's slowly working out thankfully. It's coming along faster than the last one at least. This one's going to be a bit shorter, so I apologize, but it's next chapter that all the fun begins.

Anyone else catch the season premiere of White Collar or the first couple of episodes of The Cape?

-/-/

_Friends are those rare people who ask how you are and then wait for the answer. ~Author Unknown  
_

-/-/

"If you were a rebel whose hideout had been discovered, where would you run to?"

Yuan watched Yggdrasill's back at the window. This conversation could become dangerous very quickly. "Is this hypothetical?"

"The Renegades had an astoundingly advanced base, for half-elves in Sylvarant. And they got some advanced warning, because when Kvar's men arrived, they were gone."

"Where was this base?"

"The Triet desert."

"Strange place for a base if you ask me. And what're Kvar's troops doing down there? That's way out of his jurisdiction."  
"Pronyma is taking care of him."

Yuan made a sound in the back of his throat. "I'm sure she is."

Yggdrasill twists at the waist to look at him. "You don't trust her?"

"Not for punishment. I don't doubt that she has the skill or the cruelty. It's the person that I think would be the problem."  
"Are you insinuating that she and Kvar are having an affair or am I untangling your words wrong?"

"Well, I wouldn't call it an affair. Neither of them is married, after all." Yuan studies Yggdrasill. "You never thought about that, did you?"

"And I'm glad I didn't." A strange look crosses Yggdrasill's blue eyes. "And it's something I wish to quickly forget about."

It's a glimpse of Mithos, the way he was Before and Yuan is relieved for it. Despite all that he'd done_ (That _they'd_ done)_ Yuan still wants to call him friend. Even if all they did during their friendship was argue and gripe at each other because that's what you did with family. You were allowed to fight amongst yourselves. It's when someone else came and tried to hurt one of you that everyone immediately turned against the enemy, united.

Yuan wonders how far he can away with the teasing this time. "Come now. It can't be _that_ bad an image." Mithos glares at him, but the glare is fire, not ice, so Yuan knows he's not about to get struck by lightning if he continues. "I mean, Pronyma isn't too hard on the eyes-"

"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that."

Yuan chuckles. It felt good to tease someone again_ (To tease Mithos again, just like the old days, like Before)_. It's been five months since the Sylvarant base had been evacuated and Yuan wants to hate his Renegades sometimes _(Not just the Renegades, but his. They're his now. His friends, his family)_ because they've reminded him what it was like to be around people again. Proper people, not simply angels like the ones he'd been surrounded with here on Derris-Kharlan. And Kratos, despite being his best friend, one could only take so much of him at a time.

And now he finds that it's hard to be so suddenly separated from them.

"You never answered my question." Yggdrasill says. "Where would you go?"

Back to business it was. "…I think it would depend on numbers. Are there any estimates on the Renegades' numbers?"

"It numbered, at the very least in the hundreds."

Yuan pretended not to know the exact number. Instead, he stares at Yggdrasill as if that sounds absurd. "Hundreds? How could they have amassed so many rebels without gathering attention?"

"That is a question no one has yet been able to answer. I'm sure that some are escapees from the ranch, but there shouldn't be that many half-elves in Sylvarant with no elven cities there."  
"I doubt that they'd all be pure half-bloods. They would have spread out across the world and the half-elven blood will have weakened over the generations. There could be hundreds of people with partial elven blood that have no idea about it. They could even be living normal lives. But I think Asgard might still have a decent-sized community of half-elves. Perhaps they recruited there."  
"Would they have gone to ground there?"  
"Possibly. It wouldn't be difficult to blend in with the population. I'll check it out."

Yuan is nearly out the door when Yggdrasill says, "If you happen to see Kratos while you're down there, tell him I wish to speak with him."

"You really think he'll be hiding out in Asgard of all places?"

"With that kind of thinking, he probably would if he wanted to not be found."

"If I see him, I'll pass the message along."

-/-/-/-

It's been a long time since Yuan has been in Asgard. Every time he does go, he tries to convince himself that it won't hurt anymore to see his hometown, to see the remains of it, to remember the people here.

It still does.

He goes to the oldest part of town, the half-elven part. The houses are still built into the cliff face, though their paint was eroded and cracks split the walls. Some of the steps had crumbled and the roofs were sagging. Children are playing in the street, something that doesn't quite register with Yuan the first time. There hadn't been kids playing when he'd been growing up.

Yuan remembers that, if you climbed up to the tops of the highest houses and cliffs, you could see the village flocks out in the fields and trees would be in every yard or arched over the streets if they grew directly on the cliffs. If you listened hard, you could hear sometimes hear the shepherds yelling as they brought back stray sheep.

Asgard used to smell of lamb and pomegranates. Now, hard as he tries, Yuan can only smell laundry soap, dust and ashes._ (He's grateful there are no pomegranates anymore. The smell of pomegranates and ashes still makes the bile rise in his throat)_

He doubts he'll find anyone here. No one had been supposed to come here, but then, his people were rebels.

"You don't look like a local."

Yuan glanced to the side, and then he couldn't help but smile. "I could say the same to you."

"Yes, but I'm not actually a local. You, on the other hand…"

Yuan chuckled. "It's good to see you, Kratos."

Kratos shifted his weight. "What're you doing all the way out here? I thought you were back in Derris-Kharlan."

"I was. Kind of still am. I was ordered to come here and check for Renegades. And, strangely enough, to pass a message to you if you happened to be here."

Kratos tensed. "From Yggdrasill?"

"He wants to talk to you."

"Is 'talk' a euphemism for 'torture and kill'?"

"It didn't sound like it. And I think it was Mithos asking."

"I'm not sure whether that's a good or a bad thing."

"Neither am I, but it's easier to deal with Mithos than with Yggdrasill. Where's Anna?"

"Sleeping at the inn. She's been tired lately."

Yuan did a mental count. "She's about…five and a half months now, right?"  
"Mm."

"You're scared."

Kratos glanced at him. "No I'm not."

"I didn't even say what you might be scared of."

"You didn't have to."

"It's normal, y'know. Being scared about this."

"You've told me, at least once a week in all the time I've known you, that I'm not normal."

"Maybe not. But in this case you are. Don't lie and tell me that you aren't secretly freaking out about this." Yuan hesitated. "…Has the kid moved?"

"Is it supposed to?"

It was an effort for Yuan to keep a straight face. "Kratos, it's a living person in there. Of course it'll move."

"If it has, Anna hasn't said anything."

"And she would mention it." Yuan said. "I think that, somewhere in her, she's a little happy to be a mother." Yuan leaned against one of the cliffs. "It's still hard to picture you as a father. Now, this next thing, I'm saying with all the love of a best friend, but it's a funny sight. You as a father, I mean."

Kratos smirked at him. "Maybe, but that means you're the godfather. And that includes babysitting duties."

It was something that didn't even need to be asked. It had been decided millennia ago during one of summer's many lazy nights and they'd been stretched out on the ground and counting stars.

And it had been decided years later that Yuan didn't want to be an uncle. Not again.

"You're an evil man." Any kid of Kratos and Anna's was bound to be a handful and a half.

"Only to you."

"Are you going to talk to Yggdrasill?"

"I can't leave Anna alone."

"I'll stay with her, you go talk to his high-and-mightiness. What inn are you staying at?"

"Near the village gates. Room seven. You don't need a key, I suppose?"

"Please." Yuan scoffed. "I've broken into Cruxis mainframes and magitechnology locks. One of these ordinary locks won't bother me."

"I didn't think so."

-/-/-/-

When Anna awakes, she's surprised to see Yuan sitting in a chair, reading the _Princess and the Bride_. She'd forgotten that he'd been the one to give it to Kratos. "What're you doing here?"

Yuan looks over the top of the book at her. "It's wonderful to see you too, sunshine."

Anna sat up and Yuan noticed that her pregnancy was much more obvious now and that she was moving more carefully. "Not that I'm not glad to see you, but you didn't answer me."  
"Yggdrasill wanted to talk to Kratos. I'm starting to suspect that he's tracking the both of you somehow. It was a bit too coincidental that I found you both here of all places."

"How could he track us?"

"I've been trying to figure that out and I've been coming up blank. But don't worry about that." He set aside the book and looked her over. "How are you?"

Anna shrugged. "Ankles hurt sometimes and it's hard to find a comfortable position to sleep. Nothing major." She eyed him. "You haven't been resting."

Yuan doesn't deny it and he doesn't tell her that it's because he doesn't want to give himself time to think, time to remember. The memories are closer to the surface these days_ (All the memories, all the faces. Her face, her smile, her laugh, the way she walked and talked. He misses her still, hard enough for it to ache)_ and he doesn't want to remember.

"Have you spoken with the others?" Anna asked.

Yuan had nearly forgotten that the Renegades weren't simply his new family now. "No. I thought it best until the air is completely clear. And you?"

"We saw Hassan. He was trying to escape from Forcystus' ranch."

Yuan stiffened. "Was he alright?"

"We helped him out. We left him near the House of Salvation on the Triet border." Anna hesitated. "There was some word about other Renegades being in the Iselia ranch, but I couldn't see any."

"I'll look into it. There haven't been very many red flags concerning the Renegades lately, so perhaps we'll be able to go home soon."  
"Good."

"'Course, we'd have to find everyone again."

Anna smiled. "That's gonna be the hard part."

"Would you be willing to do it? Travel around, find everyone and tell them to go back?"

"Now?"  
"No, not yet. But would you?"

"Yeah, of course. Why wouldn't I?" Yuan looked pointedly at her stomach. Anna sighed. "What is it with everyone treating me like I'm so fragile? Even Noishe does it!"  
"….You're pregnant."  
"Believe me, I'm well aware. But you guys didn't treat Yvette like this when she was pregnant."

"That's Yvette. Things are different with you." They always had been.

"Why?"

"Because you're…you. That's really the best explanation I've got."

Anna laughed. "Your skills have diminished."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah, really."

"Well, if you really think so, I saw a chess board in the common room. Want to play?"

Anna matched his smirk. "You're on."

-/-/-/-

"You wanted to speak to me?"

Yggdrasill studies his former teacher and friend. Something about Kratos had changed in some subtle way. It was nothing physical, but it was there nonetheless. "I did. Do you know anything of the Renegades?"

"I know that they are a rebel organization in Sylvarant that have been resisting the Desians, but I don't know any details. Why?"

"Because these Renegades are getting dangerously powerful and are having too much of an effect. The mana in Sylvarant is growing thinner, throwing off the balance."

"Then perhaps it's time to shift the balance." Kratos suggests. "Allow Sylvarant's new Chosen to actually make it to the Tower this time."

"That would only give the Renegades more resources. From what I've been able to figure out, they're disbanded for the moment since some of Kvar's troops raided their base in Triet. Yuan was searching for them in Asgard."

"Yes, he mentioned that."

Yggdrasill flicked a glance at him. "What were you doing there? What does Asgard hold for you?"

"It's a place to stop for supplies. Had Yuan come but a few hours later, we might not have crossed paths at all."

"How fortunate. There have been a few other breakouts of some of the ranches. Kvar suspects you."

"I stay well away from ranch territory. What other ranch did they escape from?"

"Forcystus has had three prisoners who were suspected of being in the Renegades break free. One was little more than a child and the others that are still there make a great deal of trouble."

"They must have been something else to break free from Forcystus."

"I suspect there was some outside help involved. One of the Desians who'd given chase to the escapees said something about an enormous wolf-like monster in the forest. I find that strange since the Desians are accustomed to dealing with wolves near the ranches."  
"Perhaps it was a natural mutation due to the increase of mana in the area." Kratos suggested. "The creatures in the forest wouldn't be accustomed to such high levels of mana used in the magitechnology. Or it could be something as simple as evolution."

"Possibly. You haven't been bothering Kvar then?"

"I see no reason why I would."

"You never agreed with his methods." Yggdrasill doesn't mention the Angelus Project and Kratos refuses to. She had no place in this conversation.

"His prisoners are his business."

"I see." Yggdrasill had yet to be able to actually prove that Kratos had been the one to break out the prisoners in Kvar's ranch, though he was fairly certain he had. The only part he couldn't understand was_ why_.

"If you've nothing more to say, I'm leaving."

-/-/-/-

He returns to find Anna and Yuan sitting across from each other, both studying the chess board in front of them intently. Kratos' old mentor used to say that you could tell a lot about a person from the way they played chess. Anna's style for this game was a sharp, fierce offensive. It was very different from Yuan's subtle strategies.

"What game is this?" Kratos asks, bracing a hand against the back of Anna's chair.

"Seven." Anna replied dourly. "He cheats."

Kratos snorts a laugh. He didn't doubt that. Yuan, however, has never liked being called on his 'bending the rules'. "It's only cheating if you get caught."

"I've caught you every time!"  
"That's exaggerating. You've only caught me five times."

"And this is why you never play cards with him." Kratos tells her.

Yuan looked at him. "What did Yggdrasill want?"

"To see if I had any information on the Renegades."

Yuan hummed in interest as Anna captured one of his rooks with a knight. "I'm sure there was more to it than that."

"Kvar thinks that I'm breaking out suspected Renegades."

"Well, he's not wrong about that. And you just reminded me; I have some interesting news-"

"Gossip you mean." Kratos could tell from his voice that it wasn't the serious kind of interesting news.

"Men do not gossip. We share news." Anna snorted at that and frowned when he said, "Check."

"So what's this absolutely fascinating news?"

"I do believe Kvar and Pronyma have some sort of affair going."

Anna had never met Pronyma, though she'd read and heard her name mentioned, had seen her file and her picture. But to hear that, she stared at Yuan, could feel Kratos doing the same near her.

"_What_?" They both repeated.

"Is it that hard for everybody to believe? Mithos had a similar reaction."

It's the name, not the action that goes with it, that makes Kratos keep staring. Mithos had been the one to react, had been surprised and perhaps even a little disgusted_ (But it is not the cruel disgust of adults, but the childish one that is tinged with immaturity. Mithos had been almost fourteen when Martel had been killed, when they'd all stopped their internal clocks. Old enough to be curious, but still young enough to be uncomfortable)_.

The first emotion that Kratos registers isn't concern for what this could mean for the Renegades or for them. It's a distant second to the slight, bittersweet envy of Yuan. Mithos had been his student, his friend, almost what Kratos wants to imagine a younger brother or cousin might be like. He wants to have seen that boy again, even if only in that little glimpse.

Finally, Kratos managed to find words. "We could use that."

"What are you thinking?"

"Nothing specific. But it would serve as blackmail material, since they seem to have taken such pains to keep this…affair…secret."

Yuan sits back in his chair, a thoughtful look on his face. "Why would they?"  
"Why would they what?" Anna asks.

"Hide it. It wasn't necessary. Yggdrasill might not agree or like the affair, but he won't be against it and no one else in Derris-Kharlan cares."

"Maybe they know your nosy tendencies and didn't want it used for blackmail." Anna suggested, taking his bishop with a rook.

"So glad to know that you have such a high opinion of me. And you could be right or they have something more to hide."

"Are you going digging?"

"Mmhm. Hopefully, I'll be able to use whatever I find to get Yggdrasill's eye off of the Renegades."

"I think you're forgetting something." Kratos pointed out. "They know the location of the base."

"I've solved that."  
"How so?"

"I've had a lot of time on my hands recently, so I've taken to figuring out the damn spell that keeps Derris-Kharlan hidden. I've almost got it, so as soon as the air's clear, everyone gets back to the base and the spell goes up. We're hidden away again. They could press their noses up against our window and not see anything unless I take the spell down."

"All you needed was the right motivation." Anna said. "Check."  
Yuan pushed his king out of her bishop's range. "Unfortunately, the motivation came a little too late." And at the cost of thirteen lives.

"But what about the inter-dimensional transfer system? You destroyed it so that the Desians couldn't get at it, remember?"

"Damn." Yuan sighed and pushed a pawn forward. "I have to rebuild all of that."

"All of it?" Kratos asked.

"And I'm not exaggerating. I did a magnificent amount of damage to it."

"Why didn't you just take out a few vital components?"

"Because much as I hate to admit it, not all of the Desians are complete idiots. They might have been able to repair it and the Flanoir base would get no warning. No, I'll rebuild it." Yuan's nose wrinkles. "Even though it'll take me the better part of a week."

"Two weeks." Anna says firmly. "You need rest."

Yuan reads the look on her face and knows that there will be no arguing with her. Especially since he knows Kratos agrees. "Fine. Two weeks."

"Good." Anna grins. "Checkmate."

Yuan studies the board then narrows his eyes at her. "And you say _I'm_ the cheater."

Her grin shifts to a smirk and she leans back in her chair. "It's only cheating if you get caught."


	34. Chapter 34

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **I had to tear myself away from Shadowfever to write the second half of this chapter. Not that I didn't want to write, but I've been waiting years for this book and it certainly didn't disappoint, so it's being really addictive. But I figured I owed you guys a chapter, so I sat myself down to write.

Went to Universal Studios for the first time in a while last Saturday. I'd forgotten how much fun it was—save for the Mummy, which still terrifies me. Back to the Future's gone, which I knew, but it's something different when you actually ride the Simpsons where BttF used to be.

-/-/

_The great gift of family life is to be intimately acquainted with people you might never even introduce yourself to, had life not done it for you. ~Kendall Hailey,_ _**The Day I Became an Autodidact**_

-/-/

Kratos is jolted into awareness, though he isn't entirely sure why. He scans their room in the House of Salvation, looking for anything out of place, but he didn't find anything. There are three heartbeats in the room, as there should be, and the nearest outside noise was from a few mice downstairs.

Anna stirred beside him. "Something wrong?"

"I don't know."

That woke her up. She decided to ask a better question. "Danger?"

"No." Noishe would have raised an alarm from his place outside.

Something shifted under his hand, which was still around her waist. He glanced at her. "Your stomach. It moved."

Her response hadn't been what he was expecting. "Of course it does. There's a kid in there."

"This isn't the first time it's happened?"

Something about the situation seemed to have Anna smiling. "No, but I thought you'd felt it too, so I didn't say anything. This kid can't sit still. I think he's gonna be a bit of a pain."

Kratos arched an eyebrow. "What makes you so sure it's a boy?"

"Call it women's intuition. How can you be so sure it won't be a boy?"

"Call it instinct."

Anna chuckled. "If it is a girl, she's going to have a real hard time."

"Why?"

"Really? You have to ask? She would have to put up with both you and Yuan's fussing and overprotectiveness."

"We don't fuss." Kratos said defensively. "And we aren't overprotective."

"Oh you're not?"

"No, we aren't."

"So then what do you call it when you ask me three times a night whether I've had enough to eat, whether I've gotten enough sleep, am I absolutely sure that I don't need help down the stairs?"

"You're pregnant and-"

"I'm not an invalid." Anna interrupts. There's an instinctive anger there, but she pushes it down. She knows he's only trying to help, that he doesn't know what else to do because he was as new to this as she was.

Kratos can see that there won't be any trying to change her mind on the fact that, yes, sometimes she needed help too. "And I never said you were."

She'd never seemed like an invalid, not even when she was stick-thin and just freed from the ranch. It was one of the things that had attracted her to him. She would never die while waiting for him to save her.

"You're still allowed to be…"

A smile curled the corners of Anna's cheeks. "Fussed over?"

He doesn't think she needs it—and he's certain that she thinks the same—but that didn't mean that she didn't deserve it. "…If I call it that, will you let me do it?"

"So long as you'll let me go back to sleep. It's still too early." She said, settling back against the pillows. She hadn't been able to sleep comfortably on her stomach or side after about three months and it still annoyed her.

"Good night. Again."

Anna chuckled. "'Night."

Kratos had thought her asleep for nearly an hour when her eyes opened with no cobwebs of sleep fogging them and she looked at him. "Something wrong?"

"No. Just thinking?"

"About…?"

"…What're we gonna name him?"

"I still stand by my thesis that it's going to be a girl."

It had taken a month or two, but they were both more comfortable with the pregnancy. Kratos knew that Anna wasn't entirely comfortable with it though. Sometimes, when they were walking through a town and she'd see children running or holding hands with their mothers, her steps would stutter and her breath would catch for just a moment. To most anyone else, it would've been imperceptible. To Kratos, with his enhanced senses, or perhaps it was because he simply knew her that well, it was plain as day.

"Doesn't answer my question. What're we gonna name him? Her? It."

Kratos thinks about it, tries to remember the many thousands of names he's heard over the millennia. "Nothing embarrassing."

"Did you get ever get teased as a kid? I mean, your name is a little unusual."

It takes him a moment to remember_ (It was so very long ago, before he met Yuan even because after that, he can't remember being teased at all)_. "Not for my name, I wasn't."

"Were you the kid in the back of the class with his head in the clouds?"

"Not quite. I was the kid by the window with my nose constantly in a book."

Anna chuckles and leans against him. Automatically, his arms go around her, hands resting on the swell of her abdomen. "Somehow, I have no problem picturing that. Did you have to wear glasses too?"

"To be quite honest, I don't think I've ever actually known someone who wears them. I've seen people with them in the street, but no one I ever talked to."

"My dad wore glasses." Anna remembers. "Mom always said they made him look dignified."

Kratos hums in interest, not quite sure what to say. His mother hadn't been there. Had left soon after he'd begun walking, or so he'd been told.

"Nothing embarrassing, huh?"

"No."

"So I guess Eugene is out?" She bursts out laughing at the look he gives her. Priceless, she calls it. "I'm joking."

"I hope so, otherwise your already questionable sanity would be knocked down a few pegs."

Anna nudges him playfully with her elbow. "Any suggestions?"

"If it's a boy?" Kratos pauses in thought for a moment and there's a quiet, terrible sadness to him in that instant."…Lloyd."

"Lloyd?" Anna rolls the name around her tongue. She could imagine it written out and it looked a little awkward, but it worked when it was said. Anna shifts in Kratos' arms a little to look Kratos in the eye. "…You knew someone with that name, didn't you?"

"Yes." It was a simple answer to a possibly complicated question. Anna could press the question, and Kratos would answer her, but it was delving into _personal_ business again, one that she suspects is a Yuan-and-Kratos kind.

So she doesn't press, knows that some things aren't meant to be touched on, that they'd been buried in the sands of time for a reason.

Instead, she says, "It's a good name. Sturdy. And it sounds stubborn too."

Anna hadn't felt the minute tension in Kratos' body until he relaxes and he shifts her closer to him. "You're the last one who should be talking about stubbornness."

"The same goes for you." She shoots back.

Kratos' low chuckle reverberates through her. "And if it's a girl?"

"Cheryl." The name of the sister that Anna had never gotten to know, would never get to know because even if they did bring down Cruxis, that wasn't her life anymore. Couldn't be hers because she'd found a new one.

Kratos doesn't mention the little blonde girl who'd come up to him and asked him what he was looking at. "It's pretty."

"I thought so."

They sit like that, minds too full of thoughts for sleep, until the dawn peeks over the horizon.

-/-/-/-

It's all too easy for Yuan to find them, Anna tells the half-elf when he shows up again. What was stopping Yggdrasill or the Desians from doing the same?

"They don't know you as well as I do." Yuan replies.

It had been well over the two weeks Yuan had promised that it would take. Anna isn't sure whether she is okay with that or not because Yuan doesn't look any more rested than he had before.

"Did you find anything?"

"As far as Kvar and Pronyma are concerned, not much. Their files are well-hidden. The inter-dimensional transfer system is almost operational."

"Almost?"

Yuan's nose wrinkled as he took a seat beside them on the hard ground. Hakonesia Peak was still visible from here, a dark shape outlined on the horizon. They were on their way to Thoda Island, as some of the Renegades were supposed to be in Undine's Temple.

"Apparently, I destroyed it a little too well. Some of the pieces melted together."

"Nice."

Yuan tosses her a dirty look.

"And Yggdrasill suspects nothing on your part?" Kratos wants to know.

"As far as I'm aware, no, but from what I've been seeing recently, he's been jumping at his own shadow. Doesn't trust anyone. Spends more time with the Great Seed than he used to."

With Martel's body, but Yuan doesn't like to think of it that way. Martel had never gotten the chance to have a proper funeral. Yuan is sure that thousands would have shown up for it because the ripples of distrust that had been among the different races had turned into roaring waves at her death.

"Which means he's feeling desperate."

"Mm."

"We need to feed him a false Renegade leader."

Yuan glances up at Kratos. "What about Pronyma?"

"As a false leader?"  
"Yes! It would give Yggdrasill a reason to suspect her relationship with Kvar and it could possibly bring the both of them down in one swoop."

Anna doesn't say anything, taking this chance to observe the both of them. Their relationship was a strange one, one that she still can't pin down even after a year and a half of knowing them. They're brothers, best friends, and something else. Something she doesn't know what to call.

"That's going to take a lot of false information."

"I know. But I can do it."

"Of that, I have no doubts. But if it goes wrong?"

"Has anyone ever caught me in one of my forgeries, Kratos?"

Kratos shifts and the movement looks natural except that Yuan's eyes are drawn to his left arm._ (He can still hear the words, even as he runs from the burning building…Traitor…ashamed…superior…how dare…)_

They have one of their wordless conversations. Kratos doesn't say, _Are you really going bring that arrogance into play now?_

Yuan has no illusions about what he's inherited from his elven mother. He had all the pride of her race, and while the arrogance had taken time to develop, develop it did. _I won't get caught._

_ You're not invulnerable._

_ I'm well aware._ Unconsciously, Yuan twists the ring on the fourth finger of his left hand. The ring that he never takes off.

Kratos' eyes catch the movement. _…Just keep that in mind if you insist on continuing with this._

Anna begins to get to her feet to get her pack. She knows these men and she's not patient enough to wait for them. The fire had been crackling for a while now and Kratos had started it with a spell. No smoke, he'd explained.

Immediately, both men have a hand on her arm and are helping her to stand. This time, though, Anna has to swallow the help—they still refused to call it fussing most of the time—because it was getting harder and harder for her to stand on her own without overbalancing, as she still wasn't accustomed to the extra weight of the child.

"You two should find a place to settle until the kid's born." Yuan tells them.

"If we settle, then they find us." Anna says tugging her blanket out of her pack. Even with the fire, it was still a little chilly in this part of the world.

"I think that depends on where you settle."

"The Desians have territory all over Sylvarant and they make regular rounds. Where would we go?"

"Stay with the others at Undine's Temple. No Desian can get in."

"Now that I think on it, how did the Renegades get in in the first place?" Kratos asks. "The oracle stone only responds to the Chosen bloodline."

"Part of the Temple is built outside, just on the other side of the island where no boats can reach. They were dropped off on the Rheairds."

"And supplies? How are they getting them?"

"There are fish there for food and they brought blankets and such with them. It's usually fairly warm out there. Undine's mana, even when she's asleep, guards her Temple and keeps it warm."

"What do you mean, when Undine sleeps?" Anna asks.

"Summon Spirits don't have the same limitations that people do. They don't need to eat or sleep, but without a summoner, the Summon Spirit performs its natural duties and are considered asleep. No one knows what actually happens to them at that point."

"Do the Summon Spirits look like people?"

"Most of them do, to some extent. Aska is really the only one that can be described as animalistic and Volt and Shadow keep to their own forms. But it's supposed to be a matter of choice what they look like."

"Supposed to be?"  
Yuan shrugs. "I don't think anyone ever took the time to ask them. Some of the old stories say that, once, the earth we know never existed. It's well-known that the elves came from somewhere beyond, in space, but stories say that the Summon Spirits were people once, that lived in the same place as the elves, and that the gods fell in love with them. But the people were frowned upon for daring to love someone so great as a god. So the gods created a new earth, just for their lovers and them.

"But their lovers were people, and so they grew old. The gods did not wish for them to die, so they turned their lovers into guardians of their new earth where they could watch over their children. They gave their lovers command of the smallest nuances of the world. The wind, the earth, the flames that heat the center of the earth, the waves that brush the edges of the land. They gave them command of the shadows and the light from the sun.

"But the lovers would fight amongst themselves—this wasn't uncommon before, but now that they had such power, they nearly destroyed the world several times in their anger—so the gods chose the purest person from the old earth and he became King of the Summon Spirits and was given the name Origin.

"Origin had no family on the old earth, but for his father who was a powerful magician and who loved his son more than anything in the world. So he begged the gods to let him go to the new earth, to be able to watch over his son forever. His pleas were so desperate and so heartfelt that the gods granted his wish. But he was also given a task. To keep the gods' lovers from nearly destroying the earth again, the father was given a great book and he was to write the spells for the lovers' magics in the book. When something is written in the book, the spell is forgotten, unless the father deemed someone worthy of learning one of the powerful spells. The father's name has been lost to time and he has been called Maxwell since time immemorial.

"And for a time, they were all happy. But the lovers, they knew that they weren't meant to live for eternity and so were angry at the gods. They rejected the gods and the gods grew angry. In their rage, they split the new earth completely away from the old one, leaving no way to go back and forth between them. And so the lovers, the Summon Spirits now, cultivated the earth and created a prosperous world and they still watch over us."

The moon was high in the sky after Yuan had finished his tale and Noishe was slumbering lightly near Anna's pack. The protozoan was never far from them if he could help it.

"I'm not sure whether to call that story sad or hopeful." Anna said.

"A healthy mix of both, if you ask me."

"And no one did." Anna flashed a smirk at Yuan.

"Such a loving friend you are."

Anna laughed. "Regardless of what else I am, I'm sleepy." She leaned down carefully to kiss Kratos' cheek. "Good night."

"'Night." The men chorused and they waited until Anna had curled into her blanket and Noishe had shifted closer to her, his tail thumping against the ground a few times before they were both breathing the easy, measured breaths of sleep.

Kratos saw the look on Yuan's face when she'd kissed him, had seen the aching envy. Yuan had been the one who always wanted a family, the one who dreamt of settling down somewhere to raise a kid or two in a good town with Martel by his side.

Those dreams had shattered long ago, but Kratos knows that Yuan still wants that life.

"…I've never heard that story before." Kratos says quietly.

"Well, a lot of half-elven lore is done orally."

"So you didn't just make that one up off the top of your head?"

Yuan snorted. "You were always the storyteller, Kratos, not me. That was a story that they used to tell us in our temples when we went to worship the Summon Spirits. It wasn't official or anything, but there'd always be an old geezer who told us stories of the Summon Spirits."

Kratos smiled a little and Yuan could see the kid that he'd been when they'd first met, the kid who loved reading or a hearing a good story more than anything. But the smile fades and Kratos looks over at him. "We have names for the child."

"Really? They're not embarrassing, are they?"

"No. If it's a girl, we were thinking of calling it Cheryl, after Anna's sister."  
"Cheryl…that's a pretty name."

"That's what I said. And Anna says that, if it is a girl, that Cheryl wouldn't get any rest from either of us."

"From us?"

"Yes because apparently we're overprotective and we fuss too much."

"It's not fussing! Didn't you explain that?"

"I tried." Kratos said with a helpless shrug. "She's convinced that we fuss."

"Fussing, my ass." Yuan muttered. "What about if it's a boy?"

Kratos is silent for a moment. "…Lloyd."

Yuan's heartbeat thuds in his ears. "…After him?"  
"Mm."

Yuan swallows past the lump in his throat as he remembers his nephew, the bright kid with his grandmother's eyes and his father's grin. He tries for a smile. "Let's hope he isn't as much of a handful as his namesake, though I think he will thanks to his parents."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You and Anna seem to be fond of getting yourselves in the worst kinds of trouble for no plausible reason whatsoever."

"You have no right to talk."

Yuan laughed quietly. "Seriously though, I don't think I'll be able to visit much more. Anna's, what, nearly six months pregnant?

"Seven next week." Kratos corrected.

"Even better. You two should stay at Undine's Temple. And I want to be there for the birth."

"How are you going to manage that? You said it yourself that Yggdrasill jumps at shadows and he's already suspected you before."

"I told you that I wouldn't be able to visit, but I'll show up for the last few weeks of it. I'm not missing this."

Because it was as much Yuan's family as Kratos'.

-/-/-/-

When they first see the descending angel with the person in their arms, they're immediately wary and weapons are in hand before anyone's really aware of it. But when they get a good look at just who the angel was, everyone relaxes.

Until Jayson's voice rings out. "Well clearly, you've been getting enough to eat."

The woman they hadn't recognized as Anna laughs. "Nice. A real subtle way of calling me fat."

Jayson is the first to go up and hug her, grinning wide. "Fat? Never. I'd say that you're built more for comfort now than for speed."

Anna chuckles. She hadn't realized just how much she'd missed him. Jayson lets her go and shakes hands with Kratos before cocking his head as he eyes her stomach. "Do you know yet? If it's a boy or girl."

"Not a clue."

"I've heard that's a wonderful gender to be."

"Stop being a smartass." Shera says, coming up behind her brother. "He's just glad for new people to talk to. Apparently, we all get real boring real fast."

"I never said that!"

Shera grins at her brother before she's embracing Anna and gently rubbing her stomach. "You've missed a lot."

"Same goes for you."  
After the shock of seeing Anna and Kratos again—Anna especially. While the entire base had known she was pregnant, it was an entirely different matter to see the evidence of it, to see the spitfire woman they remembered looking like just another mother on the street—everyone is running to greet them.

It's strange, to suddenly be immersed in so many people after it being just them not long ago. Anna's surprised when she sees Kratos about to take off again. "Where're you headed?"

"Noishe. I can hear him whining."

"Will he be alright in here? He gets jumpy with monsters."

"He can take it."

"That's not what I asked, but if you say so."

"Well the other option is leaving him alone and letting him swim here and then he'll only whine more." Kratos reminds her.

"He would swim that far?" Powerful as Noishe was, as vicious as he had the potential to be, Noishe had a strong lazy streak. That power was brought out by protective instincts and hunger, nothing else.

"He was a fish once. It wouldn't kill him." Granted, Noishe had been a fish four thousand years ago, but it would be like reading. You never forgot how.

Anna had been aware of what Noishe was, of how protozoans were the ultimate evolver. But hearing Kratos say it so nonchalantly, it added a weight to the words. Anna couldn't ever forget that Kratos was over four thousand years old, but most of the time, it didn't matter much. It was at times like this that Anna remembered her insecurities and wondered if perhaps Kratos saw her as a child sometimes.

Almost as if reading her mind, Kratos kisses her gently before Anna feels the subtle shift in the air that told her his wings were out before he was shooting up into the air.

Shera draped an arm over Anna's shoulder. "You are one lucky woman."

Anna looked sideways at her, amused. "Is that what they're calling it these days?"

Shera squeezed her in a one-armed hug, smiling. "I have missed you. Come on. I'm stealing you away for girl-talk."

"Girl-talk?"

"If I don't call it that, then Jayson believes he has the right to sit and eavesdrop with us."

"Ah. Girl-talk it is then."

Undine's Temple was mostly intact, but there were certain areas where the floor was crumbling and Anna wonders if someone were to search at the bottom of the sea right below them if they would find the missing pieces to the Temple.

But even if it was crumbling, the Temple had a serene beauty to it and Anna thinks she can see the ghosts of people millennia dead coming to worship here. There was no oppressing feeling like Anna had felt in some of the churches. People would _want_ to come here, knew that they had an option not to. It was a strange thought.

There is a second floor outside and they're careful about the stairs. According to Shera, not all of the Temple had been explored since they didn't want to risk injuring themselves worse than they had the ability to heal.

"First order of business, can we go home?"

Anna almost thought that the phrasing should be strange, but Shera was simply giving voice to what everyone was thinking. "Not yet, but Yuan's working on clearing the air and fixing the inter-dimensional transfer system. Our job was supposed to get to everyone in Sylvarant to tell the news."

"Supposed to be?"

"About two nights ago, Yuan decided that it was better that we come here and stay here 'til the kid's born and even after that, I'm sure Yuan is going to insist that I stay."

"That's going to be the shouting match of the ages. How is everything outside? The others? Any news?"

"Specifically, almost none. I know that a few of us got caught by Forcystus, but unless he can prove that they're Renegades, he can't keep them at the ranch and if he tries, Yuan is getting them 'transferred'. Hassan broke out."

"_What?_ The kid broke out? By himself?"

"He wouldn't have gotten out of Iselia Forest without us, but yeah. He did. Kid's got magic. Just doesn't know how to use it yet."

Shera leaned back against a sun-warmed wall. "Wow…kid's not really a kid anymore, is he?"

Anna mimicked her position, though it was slightly more uncomfortable for her. "No, I guess not. You guys don't get any news at all?"

"Well, the other entrance to the Temple, out by the geyser, is the only place where we could. If we listen real hard and the wind's blowin' just right, we can hear some of the conversations outside. But the pieces we hear aren't really news most of the time."  
"Have you guys been alright though? Like supply-wise?"

"A lot of stuff gets reused and we share a lot, but that's nothing new. The worst part is that we can't do anything. We just gotta sit. We were going to try cleaning up the altar, y'know, out of respect, but we can't get to it."

"Is it crumbled?"

"In a way, yeah."

There was the soft scratching of nails on stone and Noishe padded up to them before resting his head in Anna's lap.

Shera scratched at the protozoan's head. "Either he doesn't understand the meaning of girl-talk or he's very protective."

"It's the second one. He's hardly let me out of his sight since I got pregnant." Shera chuckled. "What?"

"I was just thinking that Noishe and Kratos are a lot alike."

"Yeah, they fuss too much." Anna said darkly.

"Honey, Kratos is going to be a father. He's entitled to a little fussing."

"What's Yuan's excuse?"

"That's Yuan being Yuan. He might not like to show it often, but does care about people. Women in particular, I think."

Were it anyone else, Anna might call them a little sexist, but she remembered the way that Yuan twists his ring when he's thinking, the fond, sad smile on his face whenever he talked about Martel. No, it was nothing sexist when Yuan worried over women.

Noishe raised his head, sniffing the air and Anna chuckled. "Let me guess: dinnertime?"

Noishe whuffed and his tail went _tick-tock_ once.

"And you won't go unless I go, right?"

Another whuff.

Anna sighed. "Alright, alright. Get off me, mutt, so we can both get food."

Shera laughed, unable to help it. She recognized Anna's tone of voice. It was the tone that Jayson liked to call 'the-things-women-do-for-their-males'. Shera told him it needed to be shortened, but it described the tone well.

But even with the tone, Shera saw the subtle way that Anna lit up when she saw Kratos, when he slipped his arm around her shoulder. Well, Shera thought, there were worse parents to have than those two.


	35. Chapter 35

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **We're slowly nearing the end. I rewrote the beginning of this chapter about five different times because I couldn't decide how I wanted to present the situation.

I've been watching Red a lot lately. Love that movie. And I'm going to see West Side Story performed tonight with my family, so I'm real excited about that.

If you guys want something to happen with Lloyd as a kid or a baby, just let me know and I'll try and fit it in.

-/-/

_A baby is an angel whose wings decrease as his legs increase. ~Author Unknown_

-/-/

He's staring at her. Or rather, at her abdomen. "Where'd it go?"

Anna rolls her eyes. "I had you pegged as an intelligent man, Yuan."

There's a sudden darkness in Yuan's eyes that Anna doesn't like. It's the kind of darkness that she's come to associate with Martel. "…It…It wasn't a miscarriage, was it?"

Anna shook her head. "No, no, the kid's fine."

Yuan narrowed his eyes at her. "Did I lose track of time again?"

"_No_. It was premature."

"And you're telling me the kid's fine?"

"Yes."

"And you're okay?" His eyes rake over her, searching for any sign of illness or less-than-wellbeing.

"Yes, Yuan. Lloyd and I are just fine. He's spending some quality time with his father. I needed to get some air."

Yuan snorted. "Kid won't be fine after too long with Kratos. I'm going to say hi to him before he's corrupted."

Anna laughed. "Kratos or Lloyd?"

Yuan smirked at her. "Either one." He was three steps away before he turned back. "I nearly forgot." He kissed her cheek. "Congratulations to the new mother."

-/-/-/-

"So, my best friend has a son and I miss out." Kratos glanced up, both surprised and not surprised to see Yuan leaning on the pillar. "I'm sorry."

"You were busy helping the organization that's taken over the world. It happens.

Yuan walked closer to Kratos and the bundle of blankets in his arms. "Let me see him? I have a right as godfather, after all."

Kratos held out the bundle. Lloyd was light, but Yuan thinks it's because it's been a very long time since he's carried a newborn. The kid's all pink skin and chubby cheeks with a line of brown hair running down the top of his head. Lloyd shifted in Yuan's arms, but didn't wake.

Kratos watched his friend with his son. Yuan had a thing for kids. Kratos had never understood it, but he did. Perhaps it had to with growing up with three brothers. Maybe it was just something inherent to Yuan. Whatever it was, Yuan was subtly different as he held Lloyd.

"He looks like you."

"That's what Anna says. I don't see it."

"Personally, I think he's going to be a stubborn pain in the ass, just like his father, but that's just my opinion."

"So nice to know that you think so highly of me."

Yuan glances at Kratos. "How are you?"

Terrified that he would do something wrong. Unsure about what he was doing. Unable to believe that the child in Yuan's arms was his son. "Not bad."

"Uh-huh." Yuan said disbelievingly.

"I don't know how to work with children, Yuan. You know that."

"Yeah, I do." Yuan sat down beside Kratos, careful not to jostle Lloyd too much. "But I also think that you're not as bad at it as you think you are."

"And why do you think that?"

"Because I remember the weird kid who used to sit under the tree and read while the other kids played sports. And that weird kid was the one who was willing to break the law to teach another kid to read and write."

Kratos looks sideways at him. "You're being rather sentimental."

"I blame the kid."

"You would. How is the progress with Cruxis?"

"I planted some evidence against Pronyma. Yggdrasill's looking into her and Kvar both, so hopefully, the air will be clear soon."

"Kvar knows the location of the base. It won't stop him from looking."

"No, it won't. That's why I'm in the stages of fixing that problem."

"What stage are you at now?"

"Contemplative." Lloyd yawns and his eyes blink open. His eyes are red-tinted brown, like his father's. "Good morning, boyo."

Lloyd's chubby hand reached out and grasped a long strand of blue hair that had fallen out of the ponytail and tugged hard. Yuan glares sideways at Kratos, who's rubbing the back of his hand against his mouth, though the smile isn't quite erased. Yuan gently frees his hair and gives Lloyd one of his fingers as a substitute.

"He's surprisingly big, for a premature baby."

"Shera said much the same thing and it got me working on a theory."

"Here we go."

"I think that the Cruxis Crystals in Anna's body along with my angelic blood made Lloyd develop faster than normal. Because look, he's perfectly healthy." A glance at Yuan. If the half-elf hadn't known him so well, he wouldn't have seen the nervousness there. "Right?"

"As far as I've seen, yes. Is he waking up every two hours?" Yuan doesn't remember very much of caring for the younger children in his village and hearing his mother's friends talk, but he's fairly certain that that was normal for a newborn.

Kratos grimaced faintly. "I've been designated as caregiver after bedtime."

"Let me guess, the argument was that you didn't need the sleep."

Kratos nodded and Yuan laughed. "And then when I argued that we should take turns, she said that this could go under the category of fussing."

"I thought she didn't like it when we fussed."

"I brought that up too. Then she pulled out the 'I carried him for eight months' card. I really can't argue with that."

"I can hear the corruption already." They both look up and Anna's there, smiling with her arms folded across her stomach. "Lloyd's going to be a fusser thanks to you two."

"I still don't understand why you have this complete objection against fussing." Yuan said. "I thought most women _liked_ to be fussed over."

"Even if that's true, which I doubt, I'm not most women." Anna leaned over and Lloyd's eyes followed her movements. His hand released Yuan's finger and reached out to her. Yuan relinquished the child back to his mother.

Anna still has to remind herself of just how to hold a baby and she still panics quietly to Shera sometimes, but it's slowly getting better. And she hadn't dropped Lloyd yet, as one of her fears had been, so she couldn't be doing too bad a job.

Anna looked at Yuan. "It's not safe to go home yet, is it?"

Yuan shook his head. "No. I managed to get the technology back online, but I'm still working on something to get Kvar to forget about where the base is."  
"To make him forget?" Anna knew that Yuan had worded it that way for a reason and she's reminded that these men in front of her—powerful, charming, fussing, sometimes arrogant men—weren't technically people anymore._ (Anna, we're monsters…)_ She's seen them kill without remorse, and perhaps it isn't the worst thing they've ever done, but she knows that they're capable of terrible things. "Exactly what does that mean?"

"Right now, it's just a thought." Yuan began and it's at that moment that he really realizes just how far Anna has managed to worm her way into their lives. When they had first met, he wouldn't have beaten around the bush. He would have told her outright. He's not entirely sure why he's beating around the bush now—to spare her feelings, perhaps? But she didn't need that and he knew it—but he does it automatically. "…There is a branch of magic that's pretty obscure. It's magic of the mind, something that Mithos has gone deeper into study of."

"There's magic dealing with the mind? How does that work?"

"I don't know the specifics. I hardly know the basics, but if I can learn it, than I can make Kvar forget about where the base is."

"And that would make him look suspicious to Yggdrasill." Anna assumed, rocking her son.

"Exactly. It would clear the air for us to get back home."

"And we're sure we got every Desian that came out to the desert?"

"Every last one."  
"Then this could work. But where will you learn the magic?"  
"Hours upon hours of studying."

"The elves might have something on it." Kratos suggested.

"If they do, they won't admit it. It's a little too close to that line of evil magic. I'll ask the Storyteller. He doesn't care about things like that and he has access to all of the elves' records."

"And you two don't"

When Yuan looks at her, Anna can see an age old bitterness in his eyes. "The elves still don't like us, especially me."

"Why you?"

"No matter what else has changed, the elves' opinions on half-elves certainly hasn't."

Anna has never known this prejudice. She knows it existed, but in Sylvarant, it was much more subdued. If there was any discrimination, it was against the Desians. But she knew that the half-elves were blamed as a whole for them.

But the look in both of the men's eyes is one that knows the worst that people could do in the name of discrimination, that had experienced it and suddenly they seem ancient and life-tired.

"That's 'cause they're stuffy and stuck in their old ways. They'll come around."

"You really believe that?"

"Well, it's either they come around or the live with being pretentious pricks their whole…couple hundred years of life."

"Thousand." Kratos corrected quietly. "Full blooded elves can live to be a thousand years old."

"Then it's even worse for them."

Yuan studied Anna. Being a mother hadn't changed her too much, not yet at any rate, but she seemed very…young just then. No, not young. Anna had very few illusions about the way the world worked and Yuan isn't sure she'd ever really been naïve. Optimistic, possibly. Idealistic…yes, that was the word. Anna was an idealist, a dreamer. Her practicality just didn't let it show very much.

And maybe that odd mix was what had attracted Kratos to her in the first place.

-/-/-/-

A wail that was becoming all too familiar was what woke him. Anna stirred in his arms. "He's hungry. I'll—"

"You need sleep."

Anna blinked blearily at him. "And you need rest."

"Less than you do. I'll get him."  
"Fusser." Anna accused quietly, but didn't stop him as he rose from their bedroll. There were depressions in the cool stone that made up the interior of the Temple that they'd softened with some spare blankets that was being used as a cribs for the few infants that were here.

Kratos untangled his son from the blankets and picked him up, being careful to remember what Anna had told him the very first time he'd ever seen him.

"_You're not gonna hold him?"_

_Kratos shook his head. "I'll drop him."_

_Anna rolled her eyes. "No, you won't."_

"_You don't know that." _

_A grin curled her lips. "Haven't you heard? Mothers know everything. Come here." He reluctantly obeyed and she held out the bundle of blankets that held their son. "Support the head, hold the body." She told him._

_It was awkward for a moment and Kratos didn't dare breathe. Lloyd looked so _fragile._ And what if he forgot to keep his strength in check? Kratos could break him, easily. But Anna was smiling at him. "See, not so hard, is it?"_

Support the head, hold the body, Kratos thought to himself. Lloyd gurgled and Kratos went to the communal cold box and fished out one of the bottles of milk that Shera made before bedding down for the night. She'd come back to the base after a market day and told them that apparently, Triet had found a way to powder their milk so it would last longer.

As the baby suckled on the bottle that Kratos held, the man murmured, "Always hungry. I wonder if this will keep up. It probably will if you're anything like your mother."

Kratos gently pulled the bottle away and put the baby over one shoulder to burp him, like Shera had showed them. Lloyd's hands tugged at his hair.

"You say that like it's a bad thing."

Kratos looked over. Anna was watching her boys with a fond smile. Her arms were crossed to ward off the slight chill.

"Of course not." He said as Anna walked closer, her hand coming up to stroke the wisps of hair on Lloyd's head. "Why are you awake? You should be sleeping."

"Couldn't go back to sleep for some reason. Besides, I wanted to make sure you didn't drop him." Her smile turned playful.

"Well, I had your assurances that I wouldn't."

"You still won't." Anna leaned against him, her eyes on their son's face. "I stand by what I said earlier, y'know."

"About what?"

"About you corrupting him. Look, I can see him turning stubborn before my eyes."

"Oh, I'm the stubborn one?"

Anna chuckled. "Absolutely." She kissed him gently. "And that's perfectly fine. He'll need a story to get him to sleep again."

"He doesn't even understand what we're saying."

"I don't think that matters. Besides, you have a good voice. It's nice just to listen to you talk sometimes."

"In other words, I have to tell the story."

"You tell them much better than I do. And you know more of them."

Kratos remembered reading books over and over until he had very nearly memorized them. He remembered sitting in half-elven temples simply to hear their sermons. He remembered sneaking into the great elven libraries with Yuan and marveling at them, at the way the sun shone through the arched windows and the thousands of texts.

"Anything specific you'd like to hear?"

"…The greatest story you know."

"The greatest one? That's difficult." Kratos thought about it for long moments before deciding on one. "Alright. There was once a man who fell in love with a woman, almost at first glance. He thought she was a goddess at first. She was fair, and just, and lovelier than all the stars in the sky. But she wished to correct all of the injustices in the world, and so they travelled together. For years, they helped small villages and towns. But one day, there was a terrible accident and she was killed. The man grieved and begged the gods to bring her back.

"They told him that she belonged to Death now and would not be brought back. He travelled across the world to Death's resting place and demanded that he bring her back.

"Death only laughed at him. 'And why should I?' he said. 'What is so great that you would get on your knees and beg for her?'

"The man replied, 'Only love, the truest love there is.'

"Death thought this was an interesting reply, and not one he had ever heard before. So he said, 'And you're willing to do anything?'

"The man replied, 'Yes. I would go to the very stars for her.'

"So Death acquiesced to his request and brought her back. But when he looked at her again, whole and alive and as lovely as ever, he had no memory of her. She was angry at Death for playing his cruel trick and demanded that he bring his memory back.

"But Death only said, 'He was willing to go to the stars and back for you. If you are willing to do the same for him, bring me back a star, for it is ever so dark here, and he may have his memory back.'

"The woman agreed to his deal and climbed the highest mountain. But when she reached up to take the star from the sky, she overbalanced and fell. When Death collected her, the man's memory was brought back. When he realized what he had done, he pleaded with the Great Fire to burn her name in his heart so he could never forget it, no matter what.

"The Great Fire agreed. The man never returned to Death to beg for her back, for he had learned his lesson. The dead stay dead. But after his many years passed and he was once again at Death's door, he looked at Death and asked, 'Is she here?'

"Death replied, 'Yes. She has been waiting these many long years for you.'

"And Death opened his door and allowed the man inside. The woman was there, as Death had said. And when she saw him, she approached him. 'Do you know who I am?' she asked.

"'He smiled at her and told her, 'How could I have ever forgotten you?'

"And Death had become so fond of them both, for he had spent so many years with the woman and had admired the man for his love, that he let them be together for all of eternity and granted them a place in the stars."

"Are they still there? In the stars?" Anna asked quietly so as not to wake Lloyd, who had fallen asleep sometime during Kratos' tale.

Kratos nodded and they walked outside, where it was a little warmer and dawn was little more than a dream on the horizon. He searched the skies before pointing, carefully cradling Lloyd with one arm. "There. Those two."

"Do they have names?"

"The Trietians call them _Zhel_ and _Zara_. The Eternal Lovers."

"The story is from Triet?"

"From before Triet, but yes. Efreet was once called the Great Fire."

"Hm. It's a nice story. A little sad, but I like it. One day, you should write all these stories down so that both worlds can read them and remember a time Before."

"I used to have them all written down. I would write them as Yuan told me them."

"These stories are Yuan's?"

"For centuries, it was illegal for a half-elf to be taught how to read or write or to have any kind of education, so many of their traditions and legends were passed down orally. It's still very much like that."

"What happened to the ones you wrote down?"

"…They were destroyed in a fire."

"You should start writing them again. If we want to bring Cruxis down, we need pieces of the old world back. Literature included."

"Perhaps."

"And that's your favorite one out of all the stories you know?"

"No."

"But you think it's the greatest?"

Kratos thought about it. "No. I'm not sure what the greatest one is. Perhaps it hasn't been told yet."

"You know what I just thought of?"

"What?"

"Maybe Lloyd will be the one telling that story."

"Maybe." Kratos actually rather liked that thought.

-/-/-/-

"I thought of something last night." Yuan says a few mornings later. He can never stay very long, but he stays as long as he can every time.

"And what's that?" Kratos asked, splitting an orange.

"We've been going about this the wrong way."

"Going about what the wrong way?"  
"Taking down Cruxis. We've been eating away at the edges of the organization and that's working, but that could take years. What if we went for the heart of the problem?"

"In what way?"

"The Eternal Sword. I'm a half-elf, I can wield it."

"And the pact with Origin?" Kratos reminded him quietly.

"Shit. I forgot." And Yuan isn't quite willing to kill Kratos for the pact. Perhaps a year or even two months ago, he would have, but now? When Kratos is managing to put a life together? "That plan's just gone down the drain."  
"No, it hasn't. What if I found a way to use the Sword?"

"Kratos, you may have enough of my blood in you to use magic, but you don't have enough to be called a half-elf."

"That's not what I mean. There has to be some way for a human to wield the Eternal Sword."  
"You were right next to me when Mithos asked Origin to forge it for him. You know the specifications. A human or full-blooded elf can't wield it."  
"But there might be a way around it, even if it's just for a few minutes. That's all it would take anyway. I'll speak to Origin about it."

"Origin has been dormant ever since…" Since Martel died and everything went to hell, but Yuan can't say the words.

"He'll wake up for me."

-/-/-/-

There's a voice murmuring at the edges of his awareness. It's familiar, but like that of an old song in which you can remember the melody but not the words. What is the voice saying? It's the same thing, over and over, like a litany or a child's rhyme.

"…In….Gin…Rigin…"

He knows these words. It's his name. That's what someone was repeating.

"Origin."

The King of Summon Spirits appeared at his altar, deep within the labyrinth of his forest. He knows the person standing in front of his altar immediately. "Kratos Aurion."

The red-tinted eyes look up. "Welcome back."

"Why did you awaken me?"  
"I seek your knowledge."

"To misuse it again? To twist the worlds into more pieces of your abomination?"

"No, the exact opposite!"

There is a fire that had been stirred to life in the embers of Kratos' spirit. Something had given him hope once more. "Why should I believe you?"

"Because I have just as much reason to want to topple Mithos as you. I don't want my son to grow up in these twisted worlds. I want him to grow him up in the world as it was, as it should be."

A son. Kratos Aurion had a son. And a lover too, logically. Yes, that would make a man like Kratos have his hope again. But the wings on Kratos' back shimmer in the sunlight, casting exotic shadows across the forest floor, reminding Origin of what Kratos was now, of what he had agreed to all those millennia ago.

"I cannot believe you."

"I only have two questions to ask of you. No favors."

Origin studied the man before him, the one who had regressed to much the man he used to be before Martel's death. "I shall hear you out your questions."

"Is there a way for a human to wield the Eternal Sword?"  
"Yes."

"What is it?"

"There is a mineral that the dwarves mine. It is known as Aionis. Should you ingest it, you should be able to wield it."  
"Ingest a rock?"

"Yes. But Aionis is very rare and no dwarf will show you where it is mined or kept, if you can find any dwarf not under Cruxis."

"That shouldn't be a problem. And how exactly does that enable me to use the Eternal Sword?"

His curiosity hasn't lessened. Kratos is still a man who valued learning, the same man who had asked Origin for tales of old, for history. "It is a dwarven art and they keep it very secret."

"They would." Kratos muttered. "Thank you for this, Origin. I know it couldn't have been easy for you to do."

"Use this knowledge for the right reasons, Kratos Aurion. I do not wish to see the pain that Mithos has inflicted anymore."

"You and me both, old friend." Kratos sighed. "You and me both."

-/-/-/-

"How was your visit?" Anna asks as soon as Kratos' feet touch the ground.

"I wouldn't call it good, but…I think it was worth it."

"Origin talked to you?"

"Mm. He seemed tired." Anna can tell from the inflection in his voice that it was life-tired. How did Summon Spirits get life-tired?

"Just like everyone these days." Lloyd reached for his father, who took him in arms. "He missed you, by the way."

"You really think he recognizes me?"

"Everyone recognizes their own father. Wouldn't you?"

Kratos doesn't think he can ever forget his. "I think so."

Anna follows Lloyd's gaze, which was one the gently glowing blue feathers. "Did I ever tell you that I used to worry about him?"

"It was fairly obvious."  
"No, I mean, I used to worry that all the flying we did while I was pregnant would...change him somehow. Or that your angel blood would."

Kratos' heart thudded in his chest. How had he not thought of that? "Perhaps he'll just dream of flying."

Anna smiled. "Who wouldn't?"

They were dreamers. It was probably a prerequisite to be a Renegade. You needed to be able to dream strong and dream big. Would Lloyd dream of soaring through the clouds the same way that Anna had once dreamed of a world outside her cell, of wide open fields and fresh air? Would he dream of seeing the world from a bird's point of view like his father dreamed of peace? Perhaps that's all the world was made of was dreams.

-/-/-/-

_For in dreams, we enter a world that is entirely our own. Let him swim in the deepest ocean or glide over the highest cloud._

_-Albus Dumbledore (Prisoner of Azkaban)_


	36. Chapter 36

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note: **West Side Story was an incredible show and I'm so glad I got to see it. I also got to see Cirque du Soleil, which was absolutely breathtaking.

I'm finally playing Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood. I think I like the second one better, but this one is still excellent. Also, after writing all this Tales of Symphonia stuff lately, I started replaying it. Every time I do, the game seems longer and longer.

My brother bought a house, so we've been fixing it up. I had the fun job to scrub the grime off the bathtubs and the shower. It wasn't too bad, but it took a while. And I got white paint all over me, though I'm not sure why since I wasn't even using the rollers, but I was painting the trim.

This chapter was stop-and-go during the writing. I find Yggdrasill a difficult character to write sometimes.

-/-/

_To tell a woman everything she may not do is to tell her what she can do. ~Spanish Proverb_

-/-/

"Dirk is well and truly hidden." Yuan said by way of greeting, annoyed.

"We should learn from him." Anna said from her perch on a sea wall. Lloyd was on the ground, playing with a few toys that they'd been able to fashion roughly for him. They were careful to stay away from the more ruined parts of the Temple that they'd been at for four months already.

"We could if we could find him." Yuan sat beside her. "And the elves are being particularly stubborn about the mind magic."  
"Ask Kratos to look for it. He's searching the libraries for any mention of where Aionis can be found."

"You're going to have to pass down the message. I can't stay long. Yggdrasill wants me for something." Yuan had dropped in on all of his Renegades scattered throughout the worlds, had passed around news and supplies. He knows that they can't stay hidden much longer. Or rather, they wouldn't. His Renegades were restless people.

But when Yuan comes back here, it makes going back to the emptiness of Derris-Kharlan much easier. He isn't sure why, but it does. Even if the smell of the ocean does still turn his stomach a bit.

"…Derris-Kharlan's a comet, right?"

"Yes." Yuan replied, not quite understanding where Anna was going with this.

"And the elves came on it?"

"Their histories say so."  
"…What are the elven lands like?"

"They have ownership of most of the lands south of Altamira. The land there is rich, and everlastingly green." There was a strange expression in his eyes. A strange mix of fondness and bitterness.

"And they like living there?"  
"I would suppose so."

"So then why is Derris-Kharlan white and mechanical like that?"

"It wasn't always like that. It's been built into that over the centuries. Originally, it was a little barren, pretty cold, but still natural."

"If it's a comet, why's it still so near the planet? Shouldn't it have gotten…I dunno, destroyed in the atmosphere or floated away by now?"

"It would, it if it was a natural comet. Derris-Kharlan is a mass of mana. The most common theory is that the elves, when they left…wherever they came from…gathered whatever was left of the mana on that world and made it into the comet so they could travel." Yuan paused before asking, "Derris-Kharlan scares you, doesn't it?"  
"Not scare, really. It just makes me really uncomfortable. It's…" Anna wasn't sure there were words for what Derris-Kharlan was.

"Not natural, right?" There is no accusation in Yuan. He'd long ago accepted the fact that the Cruxis Crystals had perverted the seraphim into monsters. The same had happened to Derris-Kharlan.

"That's one way to put it. How does the Great Seed stay alive in an environment like that?"

Yuan's hands tightened on reflex. "He found a way to keep it connected to Martel. And since she won't die because of the Cruxis Crystal…"

Anna caught the momentary flinch of his hands, the sudden tightness in his eyes. "I shouldn't have brought it up."

"It isn't your fault."  
"Doesn't change the fact that I shouldn't've brought it up." She hesitated, eyeing the fourth finger of his left hand, where the ring still sat. "You miss her, don't you?"  
Yuan followed her eyes. "Every day."

Anna can't imagine that kind of loyalty, can't imagine living for someone for four thousand years. The thought is a little daunting and slightly frightening. Having your own heart wander outside your body like that? Anna's eyes fell on Lloyd and was reminded that she was in the same situation. Kratos and Lloyd…she can't imagine life without them anymore.

Yuan chuckled when he saw the look on her face. It wasn't a happy sound. "You're officially one of us now."

Anna stared at him. "One of what?"

"The people who are crazy enough to fall in love." He said with a wry smile.

Hard as she tries, she can't hear any regret in Yuan's voice or see it on his face. Then again, she doesn't think she could ever regret any of this either.

-/-/-/-

"I have seen you here more times in the last year than I have in the last two centuries. Why is that?"

Kratos glanced at the Storyteller. "Things have been getting interesting recently."

"I'm sure." The Storyteller studied the shelves that Kratos had been looking through carefully. "And what is it that interests you about the dwarves?"

"I was told that they mine a rare mineral known as Aionis."

"They do indeed. It has been rumored to have magical properties. But the dwarves will not let you know where they keep it. It is a treasure among their people."

"You know quite a lot about dwarves. I thought that the elves had never gotten along very well with dwarves."

"That is because my people are, as a whole, fools. We are blinded by our arrogance, our pride. We want to believe that we don't need to concern ourselves without outside affairs, that we can make it on our own."

"Do you believe that as well?"

"I used to. Long ago."

"Not so long. "

This angel is the only one who has ever said something like that to him and yet, he comes to him for advice. Kratos and Yuan are trapped in a strange in-between place where they have experience and age, but they are still in the physical mind and development of young men.

"In the grand scheme of things, yes. It hasn't been very long."  
"What changed your mind? What made you think that perhaps the elven way of thinking wasn't entirely in the right?"

"What is the vice of all men?" Kratos doesn't answer. "Love."

"You were in love once?" Logically, it had to happen, but Kratos had never thought of the possibility.

"Oh yes. She is gone now, but I remember thinking that she was heaven on earth. She was a free thinker, one that caused the Elder many problems. She wished to help the humans. She managed to change my mind."

"Yes, women tend to do that." Kratos agreed, thinking of Anna and Martel. "Do you know anything of the dwarves or not?"

"As it is, the prejudice runs deep on both sides, so I have been able to gather little information. But there is a rumor that a dwarf has been hiding somewhere in the northwest."

"Very specific. Everything is northwest of here."

"Few rumors make it this far south."

"True enough." Kratos' hand absentmindedly turned the pages of the book in his hands, eyes skimming the words. "Where did the rumor come from?"

"Travelers in the inn."

"Where were they from?"

"Sybak. They are the only travelers that frequent through here. They want to do research on an alternative energy since mana is running low."  
"Heaven knows what they'll think of." Kratos muttered. But Sybak was a common travel point through the entire continent. A dwarf could stop there for supplies and be out before anyone knew they were there.

"They're trying to be helpful at least."

"An alternative to mana? I'm not entirely sure that exists." Even if the possibility was out there, Kratos can't imagine a world without mana. How would the trees, the animals survive? People could live with alternatives to mana, but they couldn't. And what would the air feel like? Empty, stretched too thin?

"I'm surprised. I would think that a man like yourself would be the first to believe in such a thing."

"I'm a traditionalist. And I must be going."

The Storyteller watched him as he carefully closed the old tome and placed it back on its shelf. The man still respected books, still brushed his fingers across their spines subconsciously, even as he stepped away from the shelf and began walking out of the library.

"Who is it that you must be getting back to?" The Storyteller asks suddenly. He hadn't expected to ask the question, but he sees the way that the angel stiffens momentarily before it's gone again. Really, had he not been expecting the Storyteller to notice? Whenever the angel would come, he would stay until he found the answer to whatever he'd been looking for, whether it take him a night or a month. After all, those measurements of time were so meager to one who had lived for four millennia or even a person who had lived for one.

"No one." Kratos replied before he flapped his wings once and was in the air.

-/-/-/-

Kratos returns to Anna holding Lloyd tightly to her protectively and she was snapping defensively at Yuan.

"…Is crazy, Yuan! Heaven knows what he'll do, but I'm not giving him a chance!"

"Anna, he _knows_. Somehow, he knows about you and about Lloyd. If you refuse now, the consequences could be much worse."

"And who told him about Lloyd?" Anna was in full spitfire mode and there was no mercy from the sharp side of her tongue at times like this. "The only people who know about him are here. The others don't know that he was born already or his name. So where'd he get the information?"

Yuan bristled. It was difficult to get him angry, truly angry, but once you did, it was devastating. "Are you calling me a traitor?" He demanded.

"Are you?" Anna challenged. "You're the one who gives him information. How do we know it's all false?"

Before Yuan can start in on her, Kratos intervenes. "What is going on?"

Yuan looks at Kratos. "Yggdrasill wants to see her."

Kratos' answer is immediate. "No."

"That's what _I_ said." Anna told him. "But-"  
"He knows about Lloyd, Kratos. I don't know how, but he does. I shouldn't have to tell you what could happen if Anna refuses."

No, he doesn't. But his protective instincts are roaring inside him that they can run, can hide, can do anything except go. "Why?"  
"I can't read Yggdrasill's mind, Kratos." Yuan runs an agitated hand through his hair.

"We can do something else. Anything else."

Yuan glared irritably at the other seraphim. "What? Go on the run again? Jump from town to town? It isn't so simple now. You have an infant son to worry about."

Kratos and Anna both glanced at Lloyd, who was gripping Anna's shirt and watching them all with wide eyes. "It can't be worse than Derris-Kharlan."

"No, it can't." Yuan agreed. "But the running won't stop. Not ever."

"I think I get a say in this." Anna said. "And I vote no. Lloyd isn't going. That's non-negotiable."

"You can't go." Kratos told her. "It's too dangerous."

Anna's eyes flashed. She was still riding the temper that Yuan had worked her into. "I think I can decide what's too dangerous for me or not."

"Considering that you marched right up to him-"

"And I'm standing here now, ain't I?"

"It took twenty Renegades as well as Kratos to get you out. We don't have those resources anymore." Yuan reminded her.

"You still ain't answered why he wants to see me."  
"And I told you that I don't know!"

Anna snarled in frustration, but cut herself short when Lloyd began whimpering at the raised voices. "He's not going anywhere _near_ Derris-Kharlan. I'll go, but he won't."

Kratos opened his mouth immediately to protest, but Yuan cut him off. "It's not like she'll be going alone. I'll be there."

Kratos wants to continue arguing and he almost does, but he knows that there's little point. Anna and Yuan butted heads all the time, their stubbornness very nearly legendary, but when they worked together, he knew that this was one argument he couldn't win. And it wasn't that he didn't trust Yuan to look after her-he couldn't think of anyone else he'd rather ask to do it—but the fact that they had to hide the fact that they had anything to do with the Renegade organization cut them off at the knees. Any suspicious actions would send them on a downward spiral.

Kratos wants to go, wants to be there in case the worst happened, but he looks at his son in Anna's arms, quivering slightly from fear despite Anna's gentle bouncing, and knows that he can't simply leave him here with someone else. Not this time.

"When do I have to go?" Anna asked Yuan.

"I'm supposed to go looking for you, so in a day or two."

A day or two until she had to see Derris-Kharlan again, until she saw the stark whiteness, the floors made of little more than glass so that every step felt like a leap of faith. Until she has to see the floating bodies of angels, real angels whose wings were feathered in white and whose faces were emotionless. Angels who didn't snap at her protectively, who didn't make her laugh or feel fondly irritated, much as an oxymoron as that was.

It's not a whole lot of time, but Anna will take what she can get.

-/-/-/-

"You shouldn't go." Kratos murmurs into her neck that night.

"I know. But I have to."

They're slowly being boxed into corners and Kratos hates it. He's never liked corners, not even as a child. "You won't do anything stupid?"

Anna chuckles. "Define stupid."

"Like suddenly decide to give Yggdrasill a piece of your mind."

He could feel her quiet laughter. "No, I think he got the message. As much as he's capable of getting it anyway."

Kratos isn't sure why this cold rattle of fear is suddenly here. It had been a long time since he'd felt fear. Centuries, in fact. But he's chained to this Temple because of Lloyd, chained because he can't leave his son right now. Something won't let him.

Perhaps Anna senses his mood or something shows on his face because she kisses him gently. "I'll be fine."

What was it that one of the men had said, so long ago in the army? Hope strengthens, fear kills. Something like that. One of the other soldiers had been being pessimistic_ (realistic)_ and the other had snapped out that pessimism would do them no good.

Somehow, Kratos finds it very difficult to be optimistic. When he mentions it to Anna, she laughs again. "It's because you're getting old." She tells him, flashing a grin before curling closer to him to go to sleep.

-/-/-/-

Derris-Kharlan hasn't changed. Not that she expected it to. Yuan keeps a light grip on her upper arm—she was technically supposed to be his prisoner after all—and his pace is brisk.

It should terrify her, by all rights. It was a not-place. There is no life here, no real life. There is no real color and Anna thinks it's a little hard to breathe. The air here is strangely thick and it hurts her head.

Yuan glances back, stopping for just a moment. "What's wrong?" His voice is uncharacteristically quiet.

Anna explains about the air.

Something in his eyes is sad. "Derris-Kharlan is a mass of mana, probably more than you've felt ever before. I think that this is what the air felt like, before the War." The air here is thick for him too, but he can stand it because his elven blood revels in the mana. It makes the magic in him sizzle and spark, makes him feel very alive, which Yuan thinks is ironic here in this lifeless place.

"I didn't notice it the last time I was here."

He's tugging her back into the brisk walk. "That's probably because you were too angry to notice it."

She watches the large, gaping windows, the transparent floors. She remembers her cell in the ranch, how she could only see a piece of the sky from just the right angle at the right time of day from when the door to the prisoner's quarters opened. The sky had seemed so very wide the day Kratos had broken her out.

"It took a bit to track them down again." Yuan says as way of greeting when they find Yggdrasill.

Anna hadn't noticed that they'd stopped. This world is dizzying and blurring and yet, it doesn't seem to move at all. This room is one she doesn't recognize, the only one with color that she'd seen. There are bronzed machines with enormous orbs powering them, which Anna recognizes as Exspheres and her anger sparks. There is an enormous seed, dark blue like the evening sky, hovering above one of the machines and there's a body lying beneath it.

Anna feels Yuan's hand spasm ever so slightly on her arm at the sight of the body and Anna looks closer. Pale green hair spread about like a halo, in robes that looked ancient in their design. The skin was pale, the palest she'd ever seen and the lips looked like they were more accustomed to smiling, though there was a distinctive sorrowful tilt to them. The woman was pretty, but Death had robbed her of the vitality that would have made her beautiful.

It's when Anna sees the ring sitting on the fourth finger of the woman's left hand that she realizes who this must be.

Yggdrasill is much like Derris-Kharlan, Anna realizes when she sees him standing by the machine. Pale, cold, otherworldly. But there's something…odd…about his eyes. "The Angelus Project."

He's already fraying her temper, but she reminds herself of Lloyd and Kratos, waiting back home. "Yggdrasill."

"You don't sound afraid of me."

Yuan's hand tightens warningly on her arm. He knows her too well and Anna swallows the smart remark that had already made its way to her throat. "You wanted to see me."

"I did. I wished to know how the Project was doing."

Anna bristles instinctively. "What makes you think I'd tell you?"

"I know of your son." Yggdrasill said, moving a little closer. He towered over her and where most men would be sounding angry by now, his voice was as mild as before. "And I know that women will do anything to protect their children."

As much as she hates to prove him right, Anna can feel her protective instincts rearing their heads. "What makes you think I know how your precious Project is doing?"

"You wouldn't, but Kratos would and I assume he would tell you."

"Assuming things only makes an ass out of you and me." Yuan grimaces mentally after spelling out assume in his head—ass-u-me, clever. He knew all too well just how good Anna was at getting under people's skin. This probably wasn't going to end well. "And why do you care anyway? You could just lock me up again, throw away the key. Wouldn't have so many problems then, would you?"

"Yes, I could do that. But Kratos would only break you out again."

"Yeah, he's stubborn like that."

Yggdrasill eyes her. She knew Kratos, obviously, but she knew him well. And the guarded words were underlain with fond exasperation. Martel used to talk like that about Yuan sometimes. And Mithos can remember her sounding like that a lot to him too.

"That made me come to the conclusion that perhaps you're simply better off outside of a ranch. As long as you check in, there are no problems with it."

It was a good compromise, Anna had to admit, a good way for all of them. But her mind instantly rebelled at the thought of being connected to Cruxis in any way. "This isn't a thing about cooperating. This is a 'I'm not doing anything that helps you' kind of thing."

"You refuse my generosity?"

There's a warning flag going up in Anna's mind, but she ignores it. "If that's what you wanna call it."

There is no noise, not a one, for a few beats, save for the thudding of Anna's heart that she's sure both angels can hear loud and clear. It's the silence before a storm, and the air is just as electric.

Anna doesn't think, doesn't have to because instinct is telling her to _Get Out_. She slips one of Jayson's homemade smoke bombs out of her back pocket and activating it. The smoke stings at her eyes and the smell is acrid, but Yuan's hand lets go of her arm and she's sprinting in the opposite direction.

With luck, Yuan could keep Yggdrasill distracted long enough for her to get the hell out of here.

Derris-Kharlan is twisting labyrinth of white and glass. No two rooms look alike, but they form dizzying pathways and Anna has to focus on not tripping over her own feet.

She crashes into walls and slips around corners until it seems like she can't remember which way is up anymore. She freezes automatically at the sound of rushing wings and, against her better instinct, she looks back.

Angels. Hundreds of them. Real ones, with feathered wings made of flesh and blood, not mana. And they all have the exact same dead look in their eyes, on their face. Anna starts running again and her side is beginning to hurt. She takes sharp turns, trying to get away from that sound of wings.

She's jerked around a corner and her first instinct is to scream and her second one to fight back.

"It's me!" A familiar voice hissed in her ear.

Anna relaxes immediately and Yuan releases her. "Where's Yggdrasill?"

"Searching the other side of Derris-Kharlan."

"How'd you know where I'd go?"

"Lucky guess." Seeing the look on her face, Yuan said, "You can yell at me later. There is an emergency teleporter not far from here. Take this hallway all the way down, and take a left. Two more lefts and a right and you're there. The teleporter will take you to a cave outside of the Tower. Noishe should be nearby. Get out of the area, get to Hima and stay there until somebody comes for you. Understand?"

"Got it." Anna hesitated. "What's going to happen to you if Yggdrasill knows you helped me?"

"Don't worry about it. Go. I can only distract the angels for so long."

"Good luck."

Yuan smirked. "I'm not the one that needs it."

-/-/-/-

Noishe is good company, Anna thinks. Protective and warm. The innkeeper in Hima hadn't been able to turn away a woman travelling alone, so she'd been given a corner in the back room to sleep in. Noishe sleeps wrapped around her and she falls asleep to his wild smell.

It takes three days for someone to come.

She's gently jostled awake—she's done that a lot while in hiding. Sleep, that is. Anna is awake in an instant, not recognizing the face above her for a minute, but then she registers Noishe's calmness against her and she knows that this is no enemy.

Jayson smiles at her. "Hey. C'mon. Let's go home."

Anna allows herself to be helped to her feet. "I didn't think you'd be the one to come."

"Well, I'm not wanted by the evil overlord, am I?"

It's chilly up in Hima at this time of year, the frost that wouldn't hit Luin for several months beginning to coat the rooftops. Anna crossed her arms in an effort to stay warm.

"How are Lloyd and Kratos?" She asked as they begin the slow descent down the mountain. The path is winding and the rock sometimes crumbled below your very feet, but it wasn't too terrible.

"Lloyd's been missing you, so that keeps Kratos awake. But I don't think he'd sleep anyway. He paces a lot. You know how he worries."

Anna smiled faintly. _(You won't do anything stupid?)_ Yes, she knew how he worried. He was the first one that had ever worried for her like that. "How have you been, Jayson? It seems like we haven't really had a chance to talk since I've been so busy."

Jayson smiled at her. Not many people asked him how he was. Shera did, but she was family. Anna wasn't quite a sister, but she wouldn't have been a love interest either, even if he'd found her before Kratos had. "I was getting restless, so thanks for being crazy enough to go see Yggdrasill."

Anna chuckled. "I always knew my insanity was good for something."

Jayson hesitated before saying, "I've heard the others talking. They're getting sick of hiding."

"Do they have a better idea for getting out of Cruxis' range, because the rest of us are all ears."

"I don't think they do. But…they heard the argument with Yuan a few days ago. They heard you accuse him of being a traitor."

Anna closed her eyes for a moment, remembering her words. "That wasn't…I didn't mean any of that. I was angry and-and afraid because Yggdrasill found out about Lloyd somehow. Yuan is as much of a traitor as I am."  
Jayson held his hands up. "I'm just the messenger, but…I think you'll have a hard time convincing the others. Yuan…he's a great leader, a better one than we could have ever asked for, but…he _is_ an angel."

"You know the story."

"I do. And so do the others. But Yuan has already betrayed Cruxis, the organization that has guided the worlds for millennia. What's to stop him from betraying us as well?"

Anna turned to look at him and Noishe accidentally bumped into her when she suddenly stopped. "Are you saying that you don't trust him?"

"Me, personally? I do. Of course I do. But again, the hard sell will be against the others."

"I don't get it. After all he's done, why would he betray us now?"

"They don't know. What they _do_ know is that you were arguing with him and that you accused him. You've trusted him from the beginning, Anna. We all know that."

"And if that's good enough for me, why not for them?"

Jayson shrugged. "Fear does things to people. We've all given up everything to help Yuan. Families, lives, homes. Maybe they weren't the best, but they were there. Yuan knows or has files on everything about us. If he betrayed us, the people we love are at stake too."  
Anna shoved her hands in her pockets. "I would've kept my mouth shut if I knew it was going to cause problems like this."

Jayson huffed a laugh. "No you wouldn't have. You were angry with him. Nothing was safe."

"Are you saying that because it's me or—"

"It's 'cause you're female. Shera gets that way too and so did Mama. Poppi always said that a woman's temper is the scariest thing of all."

Anna chuckled. "He sounds like a smart guy, your dad."  
"He was."

-/-/-/-

It takes almost three days to get back to the Temple, as they're on foot, but Anna enjoys Jayson's company. He's surprisingly intuitive and he makes her laugh.

They have to wait until nightfall to go back into the Temple, as the geyser was still a tourist attraction. They throw stones into the opening high into the cliff wall and someone's face pokes out.

"Jayson?" They call softly. "That you?"

"Who else would it be? Can you toss the rope across? It's late and we're tired."

There's no reply for a moment before a long rope is tossed across. Jayson barely catches it before tying it off against one of the pillars. "Come on." He said, climbing onto the damp rocks before carefully stepping onto the rope.

"We're gonna walk across that?" Anna said, eyeing the rope doubtfully.

Jayson grinned at her. "Yup."

Anna glanced down at the hot water that fed the geyser. One misstep and she'd be boiling faster than Doria's stew. "How long've you guys been working on this?" She asked, seeing how Jayson balanced fairly easily on the thick rope.

"A few days now, but we used to use ropes like this to play games in the slums. A few pieces of advice—don't look down, keep your hips balanced and your arms out."

Anna swallowed hard and climbed up the rock before tentatively putting a foot on the rope. It seemed to almost give under her weight, tightening at the last moment. Spreading her arms, she took a step onto the rope. Left, right, left, right, she kept reminding herself. This was like walking in Derris-Kharlan, each step a leap of faith.

About halfway through, the rope wavered and Anna felt her concentration go with it.

"Anna! Look straight at me." Jayson said firmly. "Don't look anywhere else."

It was easy to focus on him, but it was hard to keep her focus there. Step after step she made it almost two-thirds of the way there before a powerful gust nearly blew her off. She was left clutching at the rope, hanging upside down, and wishing very much that she was elsewhere.

"Anna?" Jayson's voice sounds very close, but Anna doesn't want to open her eyes to check. "Hey, you're still okay. Just…shimmy the rest of the way over."

Anna took several deep breaths. It wasn't as if she could stay hanging here forever, after all. Slowly, hand over hand, she obeyed Jayson and began to shimmy. The rope was rough under her hands and in between her knees and it feels like she's hanging somewhere in eternity, not moving_ (It's somewhere after today, yet before tomorrow)_.

A warm hand is over her own, carefully pulling her up. "Anna, you made it."

The earth feels too solid beneath her feet. "Never again. You hear me, Jayson?"

He chuckled and steadied her as the world was still spinning a little.

-/-/-/-

Kratos looked up when he heard a familiar voice. He'd been dimming his hearing while he was in the Temple. The echoes hurt his ears and Lloyd's already shrill crying nearly broke his eardrums the first time.

He hasn't let go of Lloyd since Anna left, though he's not entirely sure why. Perhaps it was a nervous habit, like pacing. They'd gotten the message from Yuan four days ago that Anna was in Hima. He would have gone himself, but Shera had told him that under no circumstances was he leaving his son behind and that if he tried, she'd gut him.

Anna was bickering with Jayson, who was grinning and laughing. Tension that Kratos hadn't known had been there eased out of him at the sigh. She was okay.

When she saw him, Anna's face lit up with a smile. She sped her walk up a little to reach him, embracing him tightly. "Derris-Kharlan smells." She murmured and Kratos nearly burst out laughing.

_(It doesn't smell. Not of anything. Perhaps the distinct lack of any kind of smell, of electricity humming through the machines or stale space made it the worst kind of smell)_

"You didn't do anything stupid, did you?" He asked quietly.

"That might depend on your definition of stupid." She was smiling and she pulled back a little, looking at Lloyd, who was bundled in his blankets and fast asleep. "How's he been?"

"Would you believe me if I said he was a little beast?"

Anna laughed quietly, kissing their son's forehead before leaning up and brushing her lips against his. "Seeing as how he's your son, absolutely."


	37. Chapter 37

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note****: **Gotta love days off. I think I finally fully understand the phrase 'mountain of books' now that I had to clean out one of my bookshelves. But the new bookshelf is up, five shelves and I already have to double-stack. Sigh. Ah the life of a bibliophile can be a difficult one.

It's been pretty hectic this past month since both my brother and my sister decided they were going to move in the month, so we've been pretty busy. That added to the writer's block that this chapter gave me for the longest time made this chapter rather late and I apologize.

Ah! REMINDER. If any of you want to see anything happen with baby Lloyd or if you think something needs a better explanation—or just an explanation period—let me know.

-/-/

_I trust everyone. I just don't trust the devil inside them. ~Troy Kennedy-Martin, __The Italian Job_

-/-/

They didn't see Yuan for many months, long enough that Lloyd said his first word_ (Papa!)_, long enough that Lloyd took his first stumbling steps on chubby legs. The seasons came and went for almost a full year since Anna and Kratos first came to the Temple.

The rumors that Jayson warned Anna about were becoming slowly louder, the Renegades more restless. Anna understood the latter. She hated being stuck in one place doing not much too.

"They don't trust him." Anna told Kratos one afternoon. "They think he's deserted us."

"I've heard the rumors. It's to be expected."

"After all he's done?"

"It would be all the more reason for him to cut his losses and twist the situation to his advantage." Like Yuan was very good at doing, if the need arose. "They won't trust him unless they hear it from Yuan himself."

But Anna knew Yuan. Perhaps not everything about him, but she knew him. And she knew him as one of the most loyal people she's ever met and the Renegades were _his_. He'd put himself in the line of fire far more than simply once or twice for them._ (It's his loyalty to Martel that has him betraying Cruxis because the loyalty of Yuan began and ended with Martel Yggdrasill)_.

Kratos' expression when he studied her was unfathomable. "Why do you trust him?"

"Because he's—" Anna couldn't find the words. But Yuan wouldn't betray them. Not ever.

"Exactly. Where, when you can't find the words, you see Yuan as you know him to be, they see him as what they fear he could be."

"It's still stupid." Anna muttered.

"Fear tends to do that to people."

A hand tugged at Kratos' sleeve and he looked down. Red-tinted brown eyes, so very like his own, looked back up at him. "Papa! Wata, papa!"

"You want to see the water?"

Lloyd nodded. Kratos took his son's hand and walked with him to the edge of the Temple. Kratos was always very careful with Lloyd and tried not to touch him very often. Not because he didn't love his son—he did, even if he wasn't very comfortable with the role of father yet—but he didn't trust his strength, his control. The memories of bruises matching his fingertips along Anna's arms made him extra cautious because Lloyd is a child with all of a child's vulnerability.

"Mind if I hide out here for a bit?" Jayson asked, sidling up beside Anna. Everyone had claimed a portion of the Temple for themselves by now. Kratos and Anna had claimed a half-crumbled area that might once have been a place for travellers to rest.

The ceiling was still held up with sturdy, elegant pillars, but one of the walls had crumbled. There were windows that might once have held glass that looked out over the ocean. Anna had discovered one sleepless night that there was something painted high on the ceiling. When she mentioned it to Kratos, at first he seemed confused, but then his expression cleared.

"_It was a mural depicting the way that Undine saved a fishing village from a fierce thunderstorm after Volt grew angry with them."_

"_What was he angry with them for?"_

_Kratos had shrugged. "I was never told. Belief in the Summon Spirits as a religion was slowly dying, even when I was a child."_

"_Really?"_

"_The Kharlan War knew no bounds to what it destroyed. Lives, homes, religions…"_

"_But people need something to believe in. If not Summon Spirits, then what?"_

"_Nothing lasted very long. Religions were constantly changing, no one able to come up with a concrete answer as to why everything was happening."_

_Anna found it ironic that the people who had grown up in a world without a real religion had split the world apart and created an entirely new religion that people had __steadily believed for four thousand years._

"Why do you need to hide?" Anna asked Jayson.

"...Call it a conflict of interests."

"Who's the conflict with?"

"Do you know Garen?" Jayson asked, naming one of the men living in the Temple.

"Not very well. Why?"

"Did you know that me an' him are…involved?"

Anna shook her head. "No. You're a surprisingly good secret keeper. What happened? Did you two fight?"

"No. Well, not really. I-I don't think we're really used to each other yet."

"Is this his first time with a man?" Anna wasn't bothered by the fact that Jayson would rather warm a man's bed than a woman's and even if she had been, it was none of her business.

"I don't know, but it is his first time being with someone stronger than him."

"What, physically?"

"And magically."

That part surprised Anna a little. Jayson was a man of many talents, but his real talents, his passion, lay in strategy. While he'd learned magic and could use it, he wasn't particularly skilled in it.

"So you're saying he sees you as a competitor?"

"I think he thought that my talents were somewhat…gentler."

"Garen's an idiot." Anna said simply. Jayson was a gentle man, she knew that. The fact that he knew how to protect himself had very little to do with it. Jayson didn't enjoy fighting like some of the men—and women—did.

Jayson chuckled. "I suppose. It's nothing serious, what we've got going anyway."

Anna tilted her head at him. "Things could change."

"I doubt it, but thanks for the encouragement." Jayson looked past her at Kratos and Lloyd. "How's he doin'?"

"Which one?" Anna asked.

"Kratos. How's he doin' with the whole being a parent thing?"  
"He's been great. Better than me, if I really think about it. I still don't think I'm used to the idea. It kind of feels like some weird dream."

"Would you want to wake up though? If this was a dream."

"…No. Not at all." Because if this had all been a dream, then she would still be back at the ranch and she never wanted to go back.

-/-/-/-

"Kratos!"

The man in question turned immediately to the sound of his name. Shera was jogging down the stairs that led to the front of the Temple, something in her fist. "Kratos! We found this just outside the entrance. It had your name on it."

Kratos took the paper, which was crinkled and slightly damp from its time on the rocks. He recognized the handwriting immediately, still straight-edged and almost childishly neat, and could read the code as easily as he read the common tongue.

"What's all the commotion?" Anna wasn't the only one asking that question. Most of the Renegades were coming closer, curious as to what was going on.

"It's a letter from Yuan."

The mutterings exploded immediately, from concerned "Is he alright?" and "Where is he?" to "…Probably abandoned us or some such."

Shera's clear voice rose through the din. "What's it say?"

"He says that he won't be able to return for a long while. Yggdrasill has become too suspicious."

"How convenient." Someone said lowly and Anna's temper flashed.

"Yuan is _not _a traitor!"

Suspicious and disbelieving eyes met hers. "You are blinded by affection." Someone else said. "You don't see him clearly."

"I think I see him more clearly than you do." Anna retorted. "He's put his life on the line to build the Renegades! He's saved all our asses more than a few times. Pearson," Anna said, finding the technician's face in the crowd. "How many times did Yuan heal you after you'd blown something up?"

Pearson rubbed his arm in embarrassment. "At least four times."

"Exactly! And—"

"Would you stop talking, lass? Just because you defend him doesn't mean he isn't a traitor."

Jayson stepped up, eyes flashing. "He gave us a chance—all of us—to fight for a better life. Where were we before now? In slums, ramshackle villages on the edges of towns that didn't want us," He glanced at Anna. "In the hands of the Desians…we're better off now. Your children are _safe_—"

"They were safe back in Tethe'alla!" A woman shouted.

"No, they weren't! A human could pluck your child, your newborn child, right out of your arms and you couldn't do a thing about it! If you fought, you'd be thrown in a cell, never to see daylight again! And for what? For defending your family, your loved ones?"

"None of that proves that he isn't a traitor."

"That's your fear talking." Anna told them. "You trusted Yuan even when you didn't even know who he was! You trusted him when he came to your villages and offered you a chance. Why should it be any different now?"

"He can take our lives away from us."

"Yes, he can. I'm not even going to try and argue that point because we've all seen what he can do. We know how strong he is." Anna was careful not to mention Kratos because they didn't need the mistrust spreading to him as well. "But has he ever used that strength against us? Even once. Come on. Pearson? Kayleigh? Mora? Anyone?"

Mutterings of "No."

"Exactly. We know Yuan. He wouldn't betray us."

Slowly, the crowd trickled away until it was just Shera, Jayson, Anna and Kratos standing there. Anna knew that their suspicions weren't through with, but she'd reminded them of what, exactly, the Renegades were.

"I'm sure Yuan would be humbled by your words in his defense." Kratos' voice seemed very quiet after all the arguing.

The others' eyes met Kratos'. Anna tried for a smile. "Yuan? Humble? Hell will freeze over before that happens."

If only they knew exactly how much Kratos wasn't lying or exaggerating. As much as both seraphim had changed over the millennia, Yuan was, in so many ways, still the same snarly slave that Kratos had met all those years ago. There had never been people to stand up for either of them other than each other. If Yuan knew that he'd been defended so vehemently by people who he had known, by their measurement, for little more than a blink of Time…yes, he would have been humbled.

"That's not all the letter says, is it?" Anna said.

"No. No, it isn't. The others are not wrong. Yuan says that there is a spy among us, but he doesn't know who it is."

"Do you have any idea who it could be?" Shera asked.

Kratos shook his head. "No, I don't. The spy could be in any of our locations, not necessarily here."

"No, I think they are here." Anna said quietly.

"Why's that?"  
"Yggdrasill knew about Lloyd." Kratos' eyes flick immediately to where his son was playing under Noishe's watchful eye. "Only someone here could know about him."

"That doesn't narrow it down very much."

"It narrows it enough. And we would notice if any of us left the Temple alone."

Kratos had to agree. The rare times that they had sent a group to Palmacosta for supplies and fresh air, the group had never been smaller than five people. "Regardless, we can't tip the spy off that we're onto them. All we can do is keep our eyes open for anything suspicious. Anyone going off on their own for too long or acting too jumpy, they're probably our spy."

-/-/-/-

"She got away rather easily, now that I think about it."

Yuan glanced up at Yggdrasill, who was leaning on the doorframe of his office. "Who did?"

"The Angelus Project."

"I wouldn't say it was easy. She evaded a battalion of angels on her own."

"That's part of my point. I don't think she could have done something like that on her own."

"You think someone helped her?" Yuan leaned back in his chair, careful not to let his thoughts show on his face. Yggdrasill was too close to the truth to be going on merely rumors.

"I think it's a very strong possibility. How else could she have navigated Derris-Kharlan so well? And no one but Cruxis members know about the emergency teleporter."

"That's true…I hadn't thought of that. "Yuan pretended to think about it. "Kratos."

"What about him?"

"He knows Cruxis' layout and he's romantically involved with her. Perhaps he had her memorize the exits and how to get there. He could have been training her for the past—how long has it been?—almost two years in case of something like this for all we know."

"You think Kratos would betray us that much?"

"I…don't think he'd count it as a betrayal. He isn't using her to hurt us and he can. Very easily. I think Kratos prefers to err on the side of caution when it comes to her."

"They have a child."

Yuan nodded. "I saw him when I found them."

"Really?" _(Yuan can remember that very same query coming from Mithos when he was still the sunchild that he'd first met, when the soldiers used to tell stories around the fires, some of which were so extravagant that they seemed little more than fables)_

"Yes. He's about…I want to say perhaps about five months old, at best."

"So he'd be about a year now."

"I suppose. Why does the boy matter so much to you?"

Something in Yggdrasill's eyes shifted and Yuan saw Mithos for a brief moment. "He would have qualities of both humans and angels."

"And that fascinates you….why?"

"Because I wonder if it would be possible for a naturally born child to have wings."

"Wings?"

"Or other angelic properties, but the wings would be solid proof."

"As far as I saw, the boy has no appendages he shouldn't have."

"He isn't a full angel, so I doubted that he would. But they could develop as he matures."  
"Perhaps." Yuan was silent for a moment, eyes still very much on Mithos, for that was who stood in front of him in Yggdrasill's body. "You haven't answered my question."

"I see no reason to." There, Yggdrasill was back in all his cold aloofness.

Yuan knew that there was little point in arguing further and he'd managed to get the conversation away from exactly how Anna had escaped Derris-Kharlan. "No, I didn't think you would."

-/-/-/-

"Where's Jayson?" Anna asked Garen as Lloyd toddled to her to hug her calf. Garen and Jayson had agreed to watch Lloyd for a few hours so Kratos and Anna could get some peace and time to themselves.

"Shera wanted to talk with him privately. They left not ten minutes ago."

"Ah." Anna hoisted Lloyd up. "Hey boyo. How're you doin'?"

He babbled more than a little before giving her a smacking kiss on the cheek.

"He wasn't too much trouble, was he?"

Garen shook his head. He was handsome enough, Anna supposed. His hair was a shade of very dark green that looked black at night and his eyes were catlike, a mix of yellow and green, were bright behind round glasses. He was taller than both Anna and Jayson. After so much time among half-elves, Anna could see the physical differences between elves and humans much more clearly and Garen resembled a human much more than most half-elves with broader shoulders and a squarer face. His ears were rounder, though his eyes were still slanted. Anna had even seen Garen with facial hair, which she hadn't known many half-elves to have.

"Compared to my younger brothers, he was saint-like." He told her.

"Really? How many brothers do you have?"

"Four. And two sisters."  
"Hellsfire. I don't envy your mother. Are you the oldest?"

"Yes. My oldest sister, Kary, she is two years younger than me. My mother often used to get angry with us, but sometimes I think that she didn't know who to blame."

"I can imagine."

Lloyd's sudden squirming made Anna look at him. "What is it?"

"Unka Jay!"

They turned to see Jayson coming towards them. At the sight of her, Jayson beamed. "How was your down time?"

"Fantastic. I actually managed an uninterrupted nap."

Jayson laughed. "A precious commodity."

"What did Shera want to talk to you about?"

"Oh, just an interesting piece of gossip."

Garen frowned. "She never struck me as the type to spread rumors."

"She made an exception this time." Jayson's tone was light, but Anna saw the look in his blue eyes. This was more serious than he was letting on.

"Is it something you can share with me?" Anna asked.

"Sure. Take a walk with me. Garen doesn't like to gossip."

"Perhaps because he doesn't have old-lady tendencies like you and Yuan seem to have." Jayson grinned, but it wasn't his usual one. Something was missing.

He waited until they'd gone out under the bright sunshine—it seemed like it was constantly summer here, with no foliage to turn their leaves or a real change in the temperature. In fact, there seemed to be only two seasons here: rainy and dry—and where the crashing waves partially obscure their words before he said anything.

"Shera saw Kayleigh head outside—as in, towards the highest parts of the Temple outside—and apparently, she was looking real sneaky about it. So naturally, Shera gets all curious thinkin' about what Yuan wrote. Well, Kayleigh ain't the traitor. Not that we saw anyway. She was meeting Pearson for some—ahem—alone time. But then Shera got an idea. We keep thinking that it's just one spy. How do we know it isn't like a pair of them?"

"Not that that isn't a good point," Anna readjusted Lloyd on her hip. The boy's eyes were on the sky_ (…Perhaps he'll dream of flying…)_. "But why would there need to be more than one spy here? I mean, we aren't a big group and it's not like we're going anywhere anytime soon."

Jayson shrugged. "I don't know about all those things. It's just a possibility."

Anna raked her free hand through her hair. "I hate spies."

"Hey, that hurts!"

Anna laughed. Jayson often had that kind of effect on her. He was right though. They were all spies and traitors now.


	38. Chapter 38

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note****: **And so another Spring Break passes once again. Back to school it is. Could be doing dual enrollment in my senior year for architectural drafting.

Sorry it took so long to get this up. I had a small block halfway through, but as soon as I pushed through that, the rest of the chapter came easily. And I'v enoticed that I do like to torture my character sometimes.

-/-/

"_Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens."_

"_Maybe, but let him not vow to walk in the dark who has not seen the nightfall."_

"_Yet sworn word may strengthen quaking heart."_

"_Or break it."_

_-Gimli, Elrond and Gandalf__** (The Fellowship of the Ring)**_

-/-/

"Does it seem like Shera's been actin' a bit…odd...lately? Ever since Yuan sent that letter."

Jayson looked over at Garen. They were both leaning on a railing in the Temple's upper rafters, which had been an accidental discovery after Pearson got lost and found the stairs. Here, the damage isn't as obvious. The pillars were all very nearly intact and the walls are still standing. The floor had hairline cracks running through it, but it was sturdy enough.

"What do you mean?"

Garen struck a match to light his pipe. "I might just be imagining things—you know her better than anyone after all—but she's just been…strange, lately. Always lookin' over her shoulder."

Jayson shrugged, trying to remain nonchalant. "I haven't noticed anything. I can ask her, if it's bothering you that much."

"I just hope she isn't ill."

Jayson shook his head, wrinkling his nose when a few locks of his hair flopped in front of his eyes. His hair was getting too long again; it was really time to cut it. "I doubt it. Shera's the healthiest person I've ever known. I actually can't remember the last time she was sick."_ (Actually, he can. It was years and years ago, when they were still living in the slums, living in cramped, damp spaces and knew the constant gnawing of hunger. She'd been so very pale and her eyes bloodshot. He'd thought she wouldn't make it. The old lady living across the street had said it was pneumonia. He can't remember a time when he'd been more afraid) _

"She's not the only one."

Jayson glanced at his lover. "What do you mean?"

"The only one acting strange. You and Anna have been too."

"I have not been acting strange." Jayson scoffed, but he made a mental note to make his searching for the spy a little less obvious.

"You really think I'm blind, don't you? Glasses notwithstanding." Garen added, pushing said eyewear higher on the bridge of his nose.

"Of course not."

"So then I'm going crazy or I'm paranoid."

"I think being paranoid is kind of a Renegade prerequisite." Jayson pointed out.

"You're trying to change the subject."

"Because you're being ridiculous, Gar. It's all in your head. I think it's cabin fever."

"That's only for when you're stuck inside." Garen told him, exhaling a small stream of smoke. He'd gotten the habit, and the pipe, from the old men on their porches in Ozette, who used to tell stories and bicker about things long gone.

"We might as well be. Can't go much farther than these walls anyway, even if they are outside." Jayson said, leaning over the rail slightly so that he could see straight down the wall to where the waves crashed against the rocks. It had become a soothing sound by now, a familiar one.

"At least you get to go out every once in a while. I haven't left this Temple since that last big run for supplies a few months back."

"If you really wanna get out of here, I'll give up my spot on next month's run."

"You sure?" Garen knew how much Jayson enjoyed Palmacosta. As a kid from the slums who'd never seen much more than Meltokio's market district, a city like Palmacosta, with its busyness and its sense of just general _life_ was something so incredible to him.

"Yeah. You go. It's not like Palmacosta's going anywhere."

-/-/-/-

Jayson plopped down beside Anna on one of the low walls that bordered the Temple. Lloyd was playing with Noishe not too far away. The two were very nearly inseparable. "We need to start being more careful."

Anna popped a grape in her mouth, offering some to Jayson who gratefully accepted. "About what?"

"About how obvious we are with our sniffing out the spy. Garen thinks we've been acting strangely."

"Did you tell him?"

"Of course not!" Jayson asked, insulted. He prided himself on being quite the secret-keeper.

"I'm sorry, but it had to be asked. Things are different with people we love."

"I wouldn't go quite that far. I'm not really sure if I love him."

"People we care about then."

"I can't argue with that. Speaking of which, where _is_ your dear husband?"

"We're not married, Jayson." Anna reminded him.

He shrugged. "You might as well be. And besides," He grinned wickedly. "You were acting like an old married couple _long_ before you were actually together."

She pushes him with her shoulder good-naturedly. "He went to try and track down a dwarf in Tethe'alla that knows something that would, supposedly, let a human use the Eternal Sword."

Jayson whistled lowly. "I've gotta say, when him and Yuan go for a goal, they go big. The Eternal Sword? Insanity. But I do have one question: if the only requirement is that a person needs to be a half-elf to use that sword, why doesn't Yuan use it? Or any one of us? We're proficient enough in swordsmanship thanks to Kratos."

"The Eternal Sword is bound to Origin and Origin's pact with Mithos is based on Kratos' life."

"Heavens above." Jayson breathed. "So you're telling me that Kratos would have to die for anyone else to use the Eternal Sword?"

"In a nutshell, yeah. And anyway, I think that the reason they couldn't ask anyone else for help with this, even if someone else could, is that they think they need to finish themselves, y'know?"

"Can't say that they don't have a sense of honor, even if it is a bit twisted."

Anna chuckled. "You're probably one of the few who _would_ say that." She leaned back, taking a deep breath. She thinks that, even after years and decades pass without being anywhere near the ocean, she'll always remember its smell, a unique saltiness.

"I've been wondering about something lately."

"And what's that?" She asked.

"You mentioned something when we were trying to convince the others to trust Yuan. You said that we trusted him when he came to our villages, when we didn't even know who he was."

"You did."

"Aye, I know. I was wondering why you did too. You had a lot more to lose than anyone if you were wrong about trusting him. You'd have gone back to the ranch, probably never to see the outside of it again."

"I know." Anna leaned forward, forearms on her thighs. "…When I got caught and got stuck back in the ranch, when we were living in Palmacosta…there were some prisoners that came up to me. They asked me how to escape, since I'd done it before. I told them to risk everything. And that's what I did. If I did trust Yuan and he turned out to be some Desian—ironic, isn't it?—then I'd just be stuck back in the ranch, where I was stuck in anyway. But this turned out for the better."

"…And Kratos? You must have known he was a pretty important member of the Desians when he walked through the ranch. How come you trusted him?"

"I didn't. If I'm remembering right, I punched him the first time we met face to face."

Jayson's eyebrows nearly hit his hairline. "What'd he say to that?" Because Jayson knew Kratos well enough to know that he wouldn't have physically hurt Anna, even if she _had_ punched him. Despite a lot of talk to the contrary, Kratos was a nice guy.

"More or less? He told me to shut up and that he was here to help me."

Jayson laughed, unable to help it. "So you're telling me that it wasn't love at first sight?" He put on a mock-horrified expression. "You've been lying to me all this time?"

Anna snorted. "Please. You were there for most of it. There's no such thing as love at first sight. At least not in our case."

"A severe understatement."

"Alright, so why did you trust Yuan? You lived in Meltokio, didn't you?"

"The slums. And why wouldn't I? It's like you said, I was no worse off if he did betray me. But it gave Shera and me a chance to leave, to get out of those gutters."

"…It's strange, isn't it? Just how far you'd be willing to go to escape something."

"What, like join an organization that's rebelling against a man who split the world in two, created an entire religion and is trying to make an Age of Half-Elves? That's not strange at all."

"Mama!" Immediately, Anna's head snapped towards her son._ (She's not sure when those kind of instincts kicked in)_. Lloyd toddled to her and held out a few small, half-crushed flowers. He was holding them out towards her insistently.

Anna took them and asked, "Are these for me?" Lloyd's head bobbed up and down. "They're beautiful. Where did you find them?"

Lloyd pointed to where moss and vines had crept up the cliff-side, spilling onto the wall and floor. "It must be spring." Anna said as Lloyd returned to the protozoan with a cry of "Nosh!"

"Certainly doesn't feel like it with this heat. You know what I'm going to enjoy most about being able to go back to base?"

"Showers?" They'd been resorting to sponging themselves down with the water from the caverns.

Jayson grinned. "You read my mind. And a proper home-cooked meal."

"What, Shera's cooking not good enough for you?" Anna teased.

"I love my sister more than life, but I can tell you right now that her cooking hasn't much improved from the days when she couldn't hard-boil an egg."

"Oh really?"

Both Jayson and Anna turned to Shera, who was leaning her hip on a pillar. Jayson grinned roguishly at his sister. "Would I ever lie?"

"Who are you to talk about cooking skills? I've seen you burn water. _Water_."

Anna snorted. "Now _that_ is impressive."

"You weren't much better."

Shera and Jayson jumped at Kratos' voice, but Anna doesn't even though she hadn't seen or heard him coming either. She's far too accustomed to his voice by now.

"Thanks for the vote of confidence." Anna said.

"I can't taste very much and even I remember how bad your early attempts at cooking were."

"It wasn't like your attempts were all that great either." Anna reminded hotly. "They were all char and practically ashes."

Jayson sniggered and leaned in to Anna. "Old married couple. I rest my case."

Anna glared at him and Jayson grinned charmingly. Kratos arched an eyebrow, not even bothering to pretend he hadn't heard every word. "I have this feeling that I missed a vital piece of this conversation."

"You're not the only one." Shera assured him.

"How'd the dwarf hunt go?" Anna asked.

"Have I ever told you that dwarves are astoundingly good at hiding?"

Anna laughed. Kratos sounded just as frustrated and annoyed as Yuan had. "I've heard the stories."

"I'm glad someone is amused by this."

"Apparently we're being a little too obvious about keeping an eye out for the spy."

"Garen thinks we're all acting a little strangely." Jayson explained. "And no, I didn't tell him."

"And no sign of a spy?"

"None. Whoever they are, they're smart."

"Well, that knocks you out of the running." Shera said to Jayson, her grin identical to his. He poked his tongue out at her in true sibling form.

Kratos sat beside Anna, resting his elbows on his knees, fingers folded in a steeple. "Jayson, you're on the next supply run to Palmacosta, correct?"

"Not anymore. I let Garen take my spot. Says he's getting antsy staying here so long. I said it was cabin fever, but apparently it adds up to the same thing."

"Anna, you and him should go to Palmacosta. If the spy is in that group, you should be able to spot them."

"And Lloyd?"

"I'll take him." Shera offered. "He should see the world outside of this Temple. Palmacosta's a good start and it'll look less suspicious."

Kratos nodded. "Good call."

"Lemme guess, you're gonna stay here, in case the spy isn't in the supply group." Anna said.

"If he isn't, he would take this chance to try and contact whoever he's contacting inside Cruxis. I'll stay mostly out of sight so as not to put them on their guard."

"Is that even possible?" Jayson asked skeptically.

"What?"

"For someone not to notice you."

Anna often forgot that Jayson didn't know Kratos as well as she and Yuan did, that he'd never seen the way that the seraphim were perfectly capable of disappearing into the background, even if they sat directly in front of you.

Then Anna considered that perhaps it was simply Jayson because Jayson was a detail man. She'd seen him walk into a room once and still remember everything about it two months later.

"Your confidence in me is astounding." Kratos said dryly and Anna snorted.

Jayson held up his hands innocently. "I was just checkin'. Can't blame a man for wanting to be too careful."

-/-/-/-

Lloyd was fascinated with Palmacosta and it hurt Anna a little to see him look so awed at all the people, at the shops and the houses. He'd never even been in a proper house before, had never even seen one.

He kept tugging at her hand and asking, "Mama, what's that?"

When they got to the market, Anna knelt in front of Lloyd. "Mama has to help Uncle Jayson and the others, alright? You stay with Auntie Shera and _listen to her_, alright?"

"Yes, mama."

With a final kiss to his forehead and a glance at Shera, she wove through the crowded market streets to join the other Renegades.

"Anything yet?" She asked Jayson lowly.

"No. But it's hard to keep an eye on everyone with all these—" Jayson was pushed into a wall by the crowd and growled at his scraped shoulder. "People."

"I'll take one side of the market, you take the other. You see anything suspicious, whistle twice. I'll do the same."

"Got it."

It was almost claustrophobic, being surrounded by so many people again. Anna was jostled and squished and her hips and elbows kept bumping into things. This was where a pickpocket would thrive, she thought. No one could keep track of anyone in this mess.

She could see some of their people picking up large loaves of bread and hunks of meat—they could catch fish outside of the Temple easily enough, but one could only eat so much fish—and there was Shera, her hand in Lloyd's, pointing out the bright patterns of the weavers' stalls and she could see the way Lloyd's head kept turning back towards the blacksmith's, where gleaming swords and armor hung on display. Perhaps Lloyd was more like Kratos than they'd thought.

Another woman was picking up soaps, sponges and buckets, all of which were useful when all they had as far as bathing was either ocean water or the puddles of rainwater that some of the Renegades had managed to direct so that they were closer to small pools and could actually be used.

She caught sight of Garen towards the outskirts of the market, a basket of eggs and fruit in one hand. He glanced around before disappearing down an alley. Anna pushed and ducked her way through the crowd, whistling twice. She saw Jayson's blonde head over the crowd, probably standing on something. She whistled again, this time doing a weird jump hop thing in the middle of her running as she tried to get his attention.

He must have seen her because he stepped down from whatever he was standing on and began making his way towards the alley mouth.

"Who'd you see?" Jayson asked as he finally caught up with her.

"Garen." She replied, trying to figure out which way the other half-elf must have gone. Here, the alley split in two, one path taking a sharp left, the other kept going straight. She was so focused that she nearly didn't notice when Jayson stopped. "What—oh, dammit. Look, I might be wrong. Maybe he's innocent. But we _don't have time for this._"

Jayson shook himself. "You're right. You keep going straight and I'll go left. Whistle if you find him."

Anna nodded and took off at a jog. No point in running if she was just going to tire herself out before she even found the man.

Palmacosta's alleyways were a winding labyrinth, merging and mixing with side streets and small canals probably used for boat deliveries. More than once, Anna had to catch herself on a building to avoid falling in the water. It's an afterthought that maybe they should've brought Noishe with them. With his nose, he could've found Garen in two heartbeats' time.

There was a whistle, rather distant, but it gave Anna a direction and she started running towards it. Someone from Palmacosta would be better suited for this—hell, someone from an actual city and not a small town where everyone knew each other would be better for this—because they wouldn't be trying to not get completely lost.

Another whistle, closer this time and Anna swiftly changed track and took a right. There was a crashing sound and Anna turned a sharp left down a particularly narrow alley.

The crashing had been the sound of Garen's basket falling. The eggs were broken, yolk running into the cracks of the sidewalk. An apple rolled past Anna's feet. Jayson had a fist in Garen's collar and had shoved him up against a wall.

"How long?" Anna had never heard Jayson sound so dangerous, his voice low and deceptively calm. But she could feel the energy vibrating off of him in churning waves.

"How long what?" Garen asked, his glasses askew.

"How long have you been selling our secrets to the Desians?" Jayson's arm was trembling now, but with rage rather than fear.

"Are you sure?" Anna asked Jayson. There was no skepticism in her voice, nothing but careful warning because if Jayson was letting his emotions get ahead of him—not that Anna really had any high ground to stand on in that argument—then this could ruin things for him.

"Yeah, I am. I saw the Desian scum run down that way." Jayson jerked his head to the left, indicating the three-way fork that this alley opened up to. "You haven't answered my question, Garen. How. Long?"

"Five months." Garen answered finally, not meeting either of their eyes.

"Why?" So much anger in a single word.

"I'm sorry, I—"

"I asked for an explanation, not an apology."

"They contacted me on a supply run, told me that they have my little brother. I couldn't let anything happen to him."

"So you betrayed us."

Garen's head snapped up, his own temper finally sparked. "Don't act so high and mighty! You would've done the same thing!" Jayson opened his mouth, but Garen ran across him. "Don't even try to lie! If they had Shera, you would have done the _exact_ same thing and you know it."

"Why didn't you ask us for _help_, you damn—"

Garen's face shuttered closed. "I don't need help to protect my brother. Not from anyone."

Jayson seemed to finally give into temptation and punched him before letting go, allowing Garen to drop to the floor. Garen dabbed at his bloody lip, posture defiant, never looking up as Jayson stormed out of the alley.

"How much do they know?" Anna asked quietly.

Garen glanced up, seeming surprised that she was still there. "I never wanted to betray everyone—you have to understand, they have my _brother_—"

"How much, Garen?"

"They know about you and Kratos, about Lloyd. They know our location—"

"And everyone else's?" Anna asked sharply.

"…Yes."

Anna swore silently, running a hand through her hair. "Do you have to work at fucking things up or does it come naturally to you?"

Garen raised his chin—he had that elven pride, a lot of it—and said, "I won't apologize for what I've done. My brother is safe."

"Yeah? And what now? Your brother's back in Ozette, isn't he? What's he gonna say when he finds out his brother's a backstabbing snake?"

"He won't know. I promised I'd take care of him and I am. I_ promised._ And if you do tell him, if he does end up hating me," His voice broke a little. "Then I'll have to live with that."

"Why didn't you bring your brother with you? We would have protected him too. He could've lived with us."

"He loves Ozette. It's not great, our lives there. We're poor and the humans are constantly looking down on us and throwing bricks through our windows, but we have lives there. Neighbors that are family too. I couldn't take him away from the people he loves. I was never going to stay in the Renegades long. Just long enough to find a way to scrape up enough money to let us live somewhere decent, a place with a real floor and warm beds."

Anna sighed. "I can't blame you for this. I want to, but I can't. You're not the first person I've met that's willing to do anything for people they love." The faces of Yggdrasill and Yuan run through her mind. "There's a line, Garen, and you barreled right through it."

"And Kratos didn't cross a line? And Yuan? They split the world apart, they put the worlds in the horrible situation that they're in. They're the reason why humans are in the ranches and half-elves are hated even more. They've done things that-that defy reason and-and they're not even _people_ anymore, Anna! They're _monsters_!"

"You think I don't know that? Yes, they made their mistakes—"

"So why does that make them any different from me?" Garen demanded. "They did it because they loved Martel. I love my brother, more than anything. Tell me where the difference is, Anna! Show me the line!"

Anna couldn't reply. She didn't know the answer, didn't know if there was one.


	39. Chapter 39

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything.

**Author's Note:** My files liiiive! My friend who checked my laptop out said that that shouldn't be happening with the virus that my laptop had, but someone up there loves me because they're all here.

Which sucks just a little because I rewrote this chapter. I'm going to try and integrate the two because I liked the first one better.

-/-/

_We have two kinds of morality side by side: one which we preach but do not practice and another which we practice but seldom preach. ~Bertrand Russell_

-/-/

Garen didn't look up when he heard familiar footsteps. They'd taken him back to the Temple and tied him to a pillar, the ropes rubbing against his wrists until they were raw.

"I won't pretend I don't understand." Jayson said quietly, not looking at Garen. "I know what it's like to have to protect someone."

"But you still blame me."

"Of course I do. You betrayed us, Gar. Nothing else to it. Traitors…there's no buts about them."

"And your leaders? Kratos and Yuan? They're traitors too. They betrayed the biggest organization in _history_ and you don't seem to even be angry with them."

"They're on our side."

"Can you be sure about that?"

Jayson sighed and slid down the pillar opposite of Garen until he was sitting on the ground. "Let's not go over this again."

"You don't even know why you trust them, do you?"

"No. No, I don't. But I do and that's enough. _They_ haven't sold us out to Cruxis and they have a lot more on the line."

Garen sighed and leaned his head back on the pillar, not saying anything.

"…You said they had your brother."

"They do."

"I thought you had four brothers."

""I did. And two sisters."

"So why did Cruxis only go after one of them?"

"Because there's only one left."  
Jayson froze. He knew the cruelties that people—not just humans—were willing to inflict on half-elves, particularly in Tethe'alla, and his mind automatically ran through the possibilities. "Shit, Garen..."

"Feeling sorry for me now?" Garen couldn't stand pity, especially not over an event that happened so long ago. And Jayson knew that.

"...What happened?"

"You assumed that he was still in Ozette. He's not. Cruxis has him. In Derris-Kharlan. They showed me a video feed. But as for how we got here," A bleak smile that was more of a grimace. "That's a long story."

"Tell me."

"I don't know all the details, but…a human came into our community and said that we had two days to gather up all our things and get out. This was about…three years back. All of our neighbors were getting their stuff together, hitching their pony carts, the whole shebang—"

"The humans didn't tell you why?"

"They didn't have to. You know Tethe'alla." Yes, Jayson did. And he felt a sudden flame of hatred for humans. "My mother…she was a real strong woman. And stubborn." Garen smiled, but it was bittersweet and sharp-edged. "My youngest sister, Jesamyn, took after her a lot. But when the humans banged on our door, telling her that she had a day to get her things in order before she was forcibly kicked out, you know what she did?

"She looked straight up at them—my mother was never a tall woman. Says she lived too long under Ozette's trees—and said, 'I spent a lot of time carving out this piece of land from men's hands and I ain't goin' just 'cause you tell me to. This is my home and I'm not goin' anywhere.'"

Jayson closed his eyes. It was all too easy to imagine what happened after that. Rebellion wasn't tolerated, not by half-elves.

Garen wasn't looking at him now, but he didn't seem to want to stop, as though now that he'd begun, he had to barrel through, right to the end. "Nothing happened that day. My youngest brother, Rhys, and I went to get firewood for supper…The humans attacked that night. They set our house on fire…broke the windows." He swallowed hard. "No one made it out."

"Goddess, Garen…"

"The humans didn't want us, and we had nowhere to go. We couldn't have burdened any of our neighbors. Some of them had actual roots in the community. The apothecary stayed, as well as the trappers. But other than that…everyone left." Garen smiled, that same bleak, bittersweet smile that was so unfamiliar to Jayson and yet, in a horrible way, it suited him. "There was this kid that lived near us, Richter was his name—he was real smart, but it takes more than that for a half-elf to get by, y'know, and he was friends with Rhys and my youngest sister—I saw him before he left. You know what he told me? He said not to worry, because the Goddess would take care of us."

"And then Yuan found you and—"

"Yeah. Then the Goddess doesn't exist anymore."

"So what'd you do?"

"Had to find him a home, didn't I? I took him to Sybak. I heard a lot of our people had ended up there-usually working as clean up crew for the colleges. I managed to find someone from our village that was willing to take him in. I used to visit him on my days off."

"And now Cruxis has him." Jayson said and Garen nodded.

"I have to get him back."

"What makes you think you can?"

"You'd leave my brother with _them_ simply because I betrayed you?"

Jayson's eyes hardened and suddenly, he was a different man than Garen had known before. "Priorities. The Renegades need to get safe."

"And that means it's okay for a nine year old to be left in the clutches of the organization that's ruled both worlds for four thousand years?" Garen demanded.

"No, but…" It was an impossible choice, but one that Jayson was willing to make. "I'm in the same boat that you are. I have to think about Shera."

"She's old enough to take care of herself. Rhys isn't."

Jayson bit his tongue a little. He'd never wanted this. All he'd wanted when he was growing up was to get out of the slums, to get a decent life. Apparently, that was too vague a thing to ask. "I doubt they'll leave him there."

"'They' being Kratos."

"He's a good guy."

"He's an angel." How different their definition of angel had become.

"…What will you do if you go back to Tethe'alla?" Tomorrow would be the deciding time. Kratos would hold the deciding factor on what would be done with the traitor. Jayson doubted that Kratos would opt for killing Garen, but he knew that he didn't know Kratos well enough to say for certain.

"Rhys will be angry with me. He's…he's a real spitfire."

But that's not what Jayson was asking and Garen knows it.

Garen sighed. "I don't know. I doubt we'll be able to stay in Ozette. Maybe Sybak."

"I'd be careful."

"Why?"

"You know Sybak. Those researchers are always looking for new guinea pigs."

"Where would you suggest then?"

"Meltokio. You've learned skills here that could help a lot, since a lot of Tethe'allans don't know very much about technology. Or…or Flanoir. It's too cold there for people to care very much what's in your blood."

Garen looked at him for the first time since Jayson had entered the room. His catlike eyes glowed in the darkness. "Why are you here?"

"What?"

"I'm not repeating myself."

Jayson stretched out his legs. "I figured you could use some company."

"And you thought you were the best one for the job?" Garen said skeptically. "You nearly punched the daylights out of me." He'd been seeing white spots dance in his vision for nearly five minutes after that. Despite his lean appearance, Jayson was surprisingly strong.

Jayson shrugged. "It's either me or nothing."

"…You wouldn't happen to have my pipe, would you?"

Without a word, Jayson drew the clay pipe from his pocket. With easy movements, he filled it with pipeweed and lit it before holding it out so that Garen could grasp it between his lips.

The smoke had the soothing effect it usually did. The first time he'd asked to try it, the old men on their porches had chuckled and made some comment about kids these days. It had taken several attempts to convince them to allow him to have a few puffs.

"There was this old man that lived above us, back in Meltokio." Jayson said suddenly. "He used to be able to blow smoke rings. Sometimes, he _swore_ that he could make a ship out of smoke."

"Could he?"

"If he could, I never saw it."

A head poked around a column, one with large, red-tinted eyes and a head of messy brown hair. Jayson saw him first. "Lloyd! What are you doing awake?"

"Unka Jay, why Unka Gar all tie up?"

Garen shut his eyes. He'd gotten too close to these people. They were friendly and open and the closest thing he'd had to a family—other than Rhys—for more than three years. If I could go back, Garen thought, perhaps he would choose to bring Rhys here. Rhys would have thrived among the Renegades, with his sharp wit and impulsive nature.

"It's a game, Lloyd. Your uncle Gar and I were playing a game."

"I play too?"

Jayson went to kneel in front of the child. "No, Lloyd. It's late. You should be in bed."

As though his words had summoned him, Noishe appeared, his steps soundless on the stone floors. The too-intelligent eyes flicker to Garen before turning back to the boy. He nudged Lloyd with his nose.

"Don wanna." Lloyd insisted.

Noishe seemed unperturbed and took the back of Lloyd's collar in his teeth, picking him up effortlessly and padding away.

"He's a little scary sometimes. Noishe, I mean."

Jayson knew what Garen meant. The fact that Noishe was probably just as intelligent as any among them and that he was the size of a small horse with all the ferocity of a wolf and the protectiveness of a mother only made him a much more frightening package.

"I asked Kratos about him once, way back when we were all still getting to know each other. He said that protozoans are the protectors of the world."  
"If that's true, you gotta wonder why Noishe is with Kratos. He certainly doesn't need protecting. Maybe, just maybe, Noishe is protecting us from Kratos."

Jayson stared at his fellow half-elf. "You don't believe that."

"I don't know what to believe. I'm presenting it as a possibility."

One thing that Garen knew was that he didn't fit with the Renegades. Not like some of the others did. Like Jayson and Shera did. Like Anna and Botta. With them, it was like you couldn't really see them being anywhere else.

"...I couldn't take care of him." Garen said suddenly. Jayson looked back at him as he went to sit back down.

"Of course you could."

Garen shook his head. "Not the way that he needed to be taken care of. I know how to be a brother, but not a father or a mother. Rhys was…he was a bit sickly a lot of the time. Ma said it would get better with age, that I was the same way." Not that he could remember that if it was true. "But she said that years and years ago and so far, she's been wrong. He…he deserved better than I could give him."

"Even so," Jayson began carefully. "I think that he would've wanted his brother there."

"I won't be able to make up for almost two years of being gone."

"Don't try to." Jayson suggested.

A smile played at the corners of Garen's lips. "Sometimes, you sound like you could almost be wise."

Jayson snorted and simply leaned his head back against the pillar. Even now, he doesn't hate Garen. He couldn't even blame him. But the anger was still there, churning beneath the surface, but he pushed it down for now. For now, he wanted only to sit in an almost comfortable silence and listen to the night sounds.

-/-/-/-

She didn't say anything when she came out to the balcony. Usually, it was a place of serenity in the close-knit community that they'd formed here. But tonight, it served another purpose. It overlooked all the outside and he could keep watch over what had become their people. He doubted Cruxis would attack so soon-Yggdrasill was nothing if not a brilliant strategist and he wasn't as headstrong as Mithos used to be-but his own instinct told him to be out here.

"You should be sleeping. There's a long day ahead of us."

"Mm. There is." Anna leaned her forearms on the rail, the ocean breeze tangling her hair.

Kratos could hear the words beneath her words, the offer of an ear without judgment because, for better or worse, they were together.

"I want to make him suffer for betraying us." Kratos admitted quietly. "A part of me says that he deserves it."

"Maybe he does."

"But at the same time, I can remember...people," The hesitation is almost not there. Had Anna not known him as well as she did, she wouldn't have heard it at all. And her mind, already so adept at recognizing such things, can tell that this is Yuan-and-Kratos' secret buried beneath the years, but never forgotten._ (He'd been a familiar man, but only vaguely. The similarities were there and he remembers suddenly clutching at Yuan's arm because they look so much alike. It's just the colors that are wrong. The man's eyes are as brown as the earth and his hair is so black, it _almost_ looks blue. And all he can hear is Yuan's litany. Brother, brother, brother...)_ "That betrayed greater things than this and they suffered. A lot of people suffered with them. I don't want that to happen again."

Anna looked out at the ocean, at the star-speckled sky. "I think that...it kind of matters whether you're doing this for yourself or not."

"I don't understand."

"Well, if you want him to suffer because you yourself want to see it, then maybe it's not for the best. If...If you can't look at him straight and tell him that he's going to suffer, then maybe he doesn't deserve it after all."

It had been a while since Kratos had seen this side of her. The side that knew the darkness in the world, that didn't shy from it. It was a side that he appreciated more every time he saw it.

"Do you think he deserves it?"

Anna was silent for long minutes. "I want to say yes. I really do. I want to say that traitors deserve what they get and that there's a clean cut line between what's right and what's wrong. But it's more than that. So much more and it makes me not sure. He betrayed us, but it wasn't for the wrong reasons. He was only doing it to help his brother. So does that put him in the wrong because he was willing to do the wrong thing for someone he loves? Because if that does make him wrong, then you are too. And Yuan. And Mithos too."

"You think Mithos is in the right?"

"I think that the means he used were wrong, not him himself. All he wants is his sister back." Anna met his eyes. "And so does Yuan. And you too."

"You think I want Martel back?"

"I know you do."

How did he allow her to get so close to him, to allow her to know him so well? The thought of someone being that close terrified him, made him want to run. Run until there was no strength left in his legs, until he was out in the middle of nowhere. _(It's only scary because it's someone new because Yuan was that close, had been that close for millennia, but when they started this, they were children, trusting and naïve and kings of their world)_

And Kratos couldn't even tell Anna that she was wrong. Because she wasn't. He _did_ want Martel back. Wanted to sit and talk with her again, wanted to hear her laughter and enjoy late night conversations because, of the four of them, they had been the night owls. They had played chess as the stars came out, had traded stories and shared memories.

Anna's voice brings him back from the dusty-sharp pain of old memories. "It bothers you, doesn't it?"

"What?"

"Missing her. You feel like you shouldn't."

"She's dead. I know that fact perfectly well."

"But that doesn't mean you don't miss her, that you don't want to see her again. You loved her."

Most women would not have been able to say those words to the father of their child about a woman who wasn't related to them. Anna didn't seem to have a problem with it. She really did know him too well.

"That doesn't mean that's it's right to bring her back."

"No, it doesn't. But it makes it understandable. All Garen wants is his brother, safe. He's not so different from you."

Kratos hummed in acknowledgement, his thoughts still elsewhere. "The law used to be that traitors to the crown were put to death. Usually by hanging."

"You want to hang him now?"

"No. I don't think that he deserves it." And wasn't this a purpose of the Renegades? To continue where the law—or in many cases, religion—left off? "I won't kill him.

"I knew that much."

He glanced at her, red-tinted eyes very ancient then. "How?"

"How what?"

"How did you know that I wouldn't kill him? He's a traitor."

"Following that logic, would you have to kill Yuan too? And yourself? You're traitors too." Anna pointed out.

"A fair point. I would have thought that you would be angrier with his betrayal."

"I am. Believe me. But that can't be our main focus right now. Cruxis knows our location, all of ours. We need to get out and get the message to the others."

Her practicality never disappointed. "The problem being how we're going to get everyone organized enough to do that."

Anna sat beside him in one of the gaps in the railing, her legs dangling along with his over the edge of the cliff. "Would it be possible to get a message to Yuan?"

"It's risky." And it involved going to Derris-Kharlan, not something Kratos was looking forward to.

"And it's probably our only chance."

"And if Cruxis comes while I'm in Derris-Kharlan?"

"We've fought them off before. We can do it again."

"Anna—"

She instinctively bristled. "You think we can't?"

"I think you could try, but the problem with Cruxis is that they won't send Desians out here this time. They'll send angels, ones who don't feel pain…or anything at all, actually. You couldn't hold off a horde of angels—because I think that's what they would send—for very long."

"Then what's your plan? If you go to Derris-Kharlan sooner rather than later, it's less of a chance that Cruxis will come knocking."

"And what happens with Lloyd?"  
Anna glanced sharply at him. "He's not going to Derris-Kharlan."

"Of course not." Kratos never wanted to see his son in that place. "But if Cruxis comes, what will you do?"

Anna's eyes were perfectly steady when she replied. "Fight to the last man—or woman—standing."

Risk everything. That was the price of the Renegades. You had to be willing to risk everything to fight against Cruxis.

"I will go tomorrow."

Anna nodded. "And Garen? What's going to happen to him?"

"If we're not willing to kill him, there is little else to do but send him home. There is little damage he can cause back in Tethe'alla."

Anna was silent for long moments, gently kicking her heels against the cliff face. "…Brothers are incredible people, aren't they?"

Kratos looked over at her, surprised. That hadn't been what he was expecting her to say at all.

_(He's never had a brother—not one by blood anyway because Yuan certainly counts—but he's known brothers. Has known brothers who didn't know how to act around each other anymore and brothers who were bright-eyed and protective.) _

"Yes, I suppose they are."

-/-/-/-

Someone had ratted them out. Yuan massaged his temples, running lists of people through his mind, their files coming to the forefront of his mind as he tried to find something, anything suspicious.

"It was Garen."

Yuan's eyes darted up towards the familiar voice. Kratos was standing just inside of the door to Yuan's study, looking more than a little tired—not that Yuan could talk. He probably didn't look much better.

"Garen?" The photo that the Renegades had on file came up to the forefront of Yuan's mind.

"No one saw it. Anna and Jayson found him out by accident."

"What happened to him?"

"He's not dead." Kratos took a seat across from Yuan. "I'm planning to leave him in Tethe'alla. Apparently, his brother's here. In Derris-Kharlan."

"You're too soft-hearted, Kratos."

"You think I couldn't have killed him?"

"It's not a matter of ability. You _didn't_ kill him and it's not because you weren't capable."

"I've executed people for treason before, Yuan." He reminded quietly.

"I remember. And you hated it."

"Because there are always extenuating circumstances."

"You're too damn merciful for your own good sometimes, Kratos, you know that?"

"You've told me that before."

"Sometimes, you need reminding. Why're you here?"

"To get his brother out. Do you know where he is?"

"I'll give you three guesses and the first two don't count."

"The cells?"

"Mm. I heard him on my way here." Yuan hadn't wanted to, but he'd needed to find him. Derris-Kharlan wasn't a fit place for anyone, let alone a child.

"I'm taking him with me." Kratos said.

"Who was it?"

Kratos didn't need an explanation. "Garen."

"I can't say that I'm floored, but I'd hoped Jayson would be able to sway him somewhat."

"You knew?"

"I suspected. Garen never really…felt right."

Kratos made a noise of understanding. "I'm going to need a distraction."

"You always do bring the best entertainment with you." Yuan drummed his fingers on the desk. "It would have to be a good enough distraction to get the guards away from the cells, but not on so large a scale that Yggdrasill gets involved."

"Mana fragments."

Yuan frowned at him, for once not understanding his train of thought. "What about them?"

"They're vital to Yggdrasill's experiments and the angels know it. So if there was, say, a malfunction or signs of a break-in…"

"They'd rush there. I always did like the way you think, even if you are damn insane."

"How quickly can you set it up?"

Yuan walked around his desk, leaning over to peer into the monitor on his desk, his hands already tapping away at the keys. "Give me ten minutes."

There was little sound but the clacking of keys and the humming of machines to fill the room until Yuan asked, "Do you ever feel old, Kratos?"

The other seraphim glanced at him and suddenly, they're two teenagers again, travelling on their own and trying to figure things out without help from anyone else because, back then, Kratos-and-Yuan could take on the world.

"We _are_ old. We're the oldest people alive."

"Yeah, but you don't usually _feel_ it, do you? In your bones, I mean."

"You sound like the old veterans sitting on their porches and smoking their pipes, telling us whether it was going to rain tomorrow or not because their joints were aching."

"Mm. Old swordsmen and their scars know the coming rain." It was an old saying when they first entered the military. Sometimes, Yuan found himself believing it.

"I don't feel the rain yet." Kratos said. He doesn't say that it's because he thinks that he's too far into the angel transformation to feel things like old aches because when you're an angel, you don't get old. "We've still got time."

And that sounds so very much like the boy Yuan remembered, the brother he had travelled with, that it made him smile a little. "But we won't have much more if we don't hurry up. Go back to Anna and Lloyd. I'll take care of things here."

"…Anna and I won't be going back. Not to live. We thought it better if Cruxis didn't have a reason to invade."

Yuan looked up, but quickly looked back down, fingers flying on the keyboard. "So you're letting yourselves be hunted down to get the attention off of the Renegades? Noble of you. And Lloyd?"

"He would come with us, of course."

"He's—what, a year old?"

"He'll be two in four months."

"Mmhm. And you're going on the run? With a toddler?"

"Crazier things have been done." Kratos pointed out. He knew it wasn't the best plan for his family, but it was the best one overall. If they stayed with the Renegades, they'd end up repeating this cycle again. Cruxis only wanted the Angelus Project. The Renegades were a minor annoyance that seemed bigger than they were because of the protection they'd given Anna.

"Yes," Yuan agreed. "By us. You'd think you would've learned by now."

"The Renegades will be safe and you know it." Kratos knew that Yuan would stop arguing for his people. Eventually.

"You and Anna _are_ Renegades."

"We don't have time to argue this. How's that distraction coming?"

Yuan clicked a few more keys, eyes scanning the screen in front of him. "It...is…done. Go. You only have about a twenty minute window."

-/-/-/-

The Temple was a flurry of activity when Kratos arrived. The areas that had been transformed into places for living, for cooking and playing and sleeping, were very nearly stripped down. Everything was in two stacks. One looked like essentials, the other nonessentials.

Kratos wasn't surprised in the least to see Anna in the middle of it all, lifting and piling things. "What's to be done with the other pile?"

"We figured to burn it." She replied, pushing stubborn locks of her hair out of her face. "Can't leave any evidence for Cruxis that could lead back to us."

Kratos wondered how the women in his life were always so practical, so intelligent. "We're going back."

Anna stared at him, as though she half-expected him to add on that he was joking. "Home?"

"Yes."

Anna smiled, wide and brilliant, "About time. How was Yuan?"

Life-tired, stressed. "He seemed fine. A bit bored, to be honest."

If Anna thought he was lying, she showed no sign of it. "It's hard to find people as lively as we are." Particularly on Derris-Kharlan.

"Is Cruxis coming? Do you know?"

"I didn't see any sign of them preparing, but that's no guarantee. The angels…they're very nearly robots in the truest sense."

"Robots." Anna rolled the word in her mouth. Before she began learning about the machines in the base, she'd never heard that word. The Tethe'allans had been surprised, but the other Sylvaranti had been in the same boat. It had been one more obstacle between the people of the two worlds, one more difference that had to be bridged and worked around.

She looked at him and Kratos had the sudden feeling that she was looking through him. "You're no robot."

"I was. For a while." For many years _(Months? Days? Centuries?)_ before he had found his balance again after Martel's death. After all, he had loved her too.

Anna shook her head. "I find that hard to believe."

Kratos blinked at her. Anyone else, even Yuan, would have agreed with him, even if only to some degree. "It happened."

"I don't doubt that. I just can't quite picture it. Even when I would see you around the ranch on your inspections…I never saw anything even remotely resembling a robot."

"I don't think you knew what you were seeing."

Anna propped her hands on her hips. "I knew exactly what I was seeing, thank you, even if you don't believe me."

"Gary!"

There were murmurs of confusion and out-loud wonderings if they heard right. The only Gary that they knew was in Tethe'alla right now. And no one recognized the child's voice, high and with a strong Sybakan accent.

Naturally, everyone had to see what was going on. Renegades were nothing if not curious. Garen was still tied to the pillar and Jayson had never seen his eyes light up like they did when they saw the kid run through the doors.

Rhys looked like him just enough so that you knew they were related. The hair was a lighter shade of green and there was no chubbiness in his cheeks—which wasn't strange for a half-elf in Tethe'alla. But his skin was lighter, his features more elven.

Garen was laughing as Rhys buried his face in his shirt. They were murmuring between themselves and it was something separate from the rest of the world.

"You gonna leave him tied up there?" Jayson asked, stepping up to where Kratos and Anna were. "You're not even gonna let him hug his own brother?"

"It's an issue of safety." Kratos said.

"We're leaving in two hours. And I know what you're going to say and that's that there's a lot of damage that can be done in two hours, but dammit, he did all this for his brother. He should at least be able to hug him."

Kratos looked sideways at him. "Still care about him, don't you?"

Jayson shrugged a little, hands in his pockets. "He wasn't all bad. Just wanted to help his brother. He was right, what he said about me. I don't like to admit it, but I probably would've done the same thing if those bastards had Shera."

"You're too soft-hearted."

Jayson chuckled. "If you say so, pot."

At first, Kratos didn't understand. Then it clicked. Something about pots calling kettles black. It hadn't been a phrase that had been around when he was growing up. It had only started popping up recently.

"I'm on Jayson's side this time." Anna said before hefting another crate and walking away.

-/-/-/-

"Not as much of a cold-hearted bastard as you act, are you?" Garen said as the ropes around his wrists were cut.

"You have Jayson to thank for this. If it were up to me, you'd still be there."

"You're too kind."

"Gary…is he a friend of yours?" Rhys asked. He still had a child's wide eyes, slanted though they were.

Garen smiled at him. "Something like that." He looked back to Kratos. "Still dropping us off at Flanoir?"

"Sybak. It has a port. If you want my advice—"

"Which I don't, but I doubt that that's going to stop you."

"You should stay away from Tethe'alla. There aren't many places for a half-elf to hide there and Cruxis has ways of tracking people in big places like that."

"And you'd know, wouldn't you?"

"You're real hostile for someone in your position, Garen." Anna said, coming up behind them. "Particularly for someone who's getting off more or less scot free." She turned to Kratos. "We're done packing. There're only a few things left inside."

Everyone heard it and everyone had a sort of bittersweet ache form somewhere in their chest. Because while they were glad, overjoyed even, to be going back to the base, which, somewhere along the way, had become _home_, this place had become a home too. This Temple, with its serenity and its strong walls and salty smells, which was so different from the sandstone and the heat of Triet, had welcomed and hid them.

Why was it that life had the tendency to take things away only when one was just settling things in, when things were becoming threadbare and comfortable and _there?_ Why, why, why?


	40. Chapter 40

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything!

**Author's Note:** Got stuck for a while on this chapter. I wasn't quite sure how I wanted to write it and then of course I'm learning to drive—slowly, but surely—and, of course, Harry Potter came out, so I had to go see that and have my own mini marathon beforehand. Bittersweet days, let me tell you.

Ah, and as a point of interest that I don't think I've mentioned before-the things in italics and the seraphim's memories, I'm trying to write them into my other story, Offerings to a Star. Just in case anyone wanted some elaboration on all that.

-/-/-/-

_The man with a clear conscience probably has a poor memory. _

_~Author Unknown_

-/-/-/-

"Mama, where Unka Jay?"

Anna winced at the question. It had been three weeks since the Renegades had returned to the Sylvarant Base and Lloyd was acutely missing the family he'd become accustomed to seeing every day.

"Uncle Jay is at his house." She told the toddler who was riding on Noishe.

"Oh. Visit?"

"No, hon, we can't visit him. Not for a while."

"Oh. Why?"

Anna hesitated, not wanting to tell Lloyd any details, but she knew she had to give an answer. "Because I said so."

Lloyd blinked at her thoughtfully before nodding and buried his nose in Noishe's fur.

"Breaking out that excuse already?" Kratos' voice was a murmur in her ear.

"It works."

"Clearly. Thought, somehow, I doubt it would work so well if I said the same thing."

"It's a mother thing. Do you have any particular place that we're travelling to or is this aimless wandering?"

"There is a House of Salvation not far outside of Asgard. I thought we could stay there for a day or two."

"Mm." Anna hesitated because this was very much a Yuan-and-Kratos thing, but she went forward and asked anyway. "Is this how you and Yuan lived for a while? After you left home."

It had been an almost unconscious thing, trying to piece together Kratos' past. It was like an enormous puzzle, all with missing or incomplete pieces. Like she had the border, but none of the middle. She knew where it started and she knew where it ended, but she wanted to know what happened in between it all.

Kratos glanced at her and Anna saw the moment of indecisiveness, the moment of stubborn childishness where he wanted to keep all of his secrets to himself. But the moment passed quickly. "…Yes, yes it was. Noishe, however, was a bird then."

Anna looked at Noishe, who whuffed an affirmative. She tried to imagine this majestic, dangerous, occasionally puppyish creature with too large ears as a bird and she found that she couldn't. Not really. The image that came to mind was a little bit like Kratos' past—bits and pieces.

Noishe would have had a long slender neck, but would his beak have been long and narrow like a crane or short and tough like a sparrow's? His legs would have been long and powerful, but would his feet have been flat, made more for running, or would they have had a strong curve to them like that of a hawk? His wings would have been great and long, glinting silvery-green like his fur in the sun, but would his tail feathers have been long and sweeping or short and puffy? His eyes would, of course, still have been that intelligent hazel that changed colors depending on how the light hit them, but would they have been large and round like an owl's or smaller, like a falcon's?

"The three of you must have made an interesting sight on the road." Anna said finally.

"Noishe usually tried to keep to the bushes back then, but yes, we did."

"How long did you two travel together for?"

Kratos seemed to actually have to think about that one. "I was…sixteen when we started travelling—Yuan has always been a week younger than me…" He trailed off in thought, in memory. They hadn't stopped travelling when they met Martel and Mithos. They had travelled together with them for months before they went to the half-elven capital where they joined the military. "We joined the military when we were…nineteen? Yes, because another year would have made ten years of service…So about three years."

"Was that when you met…Mithos?" Anna tried not to say Martel's name around the seraphim. She knew it hurt.

Kratos gave her a look that told her that he had heard the momentary hesitation on the name, that he knew the reason for it and that he was grateful for it. "No. We met them when we were travelling. Martel was…rather insistent…that she didn't need any help on the road, that she could protect herself and Mithos without outside assistance."

"Could she?"

"Oh, absolutely. But we didn't believe that at the time."

The more Anna heard about Martel—this strong, beautiful woman—the more she wished that she could have known her because Anna had the strange feeling that she would actually have gotten along rather well with her.

They both stopped walking when they noticed the way that Noishe's ears were pricked forward, his body tense. Kratos expanded his senses, though he knew that Noishe's hearing was better than his could ever be.

"Footsteps. And they sound military."

"How far away?"

"I'd say about a mile. It won't take them long to reach us. There is a hunting trail that way. We can circumvent the main road until Hakonesia."

Anna followed him without question. The trail looked as though part of it had been burned away in a lightning fire, but an old one. The path was stomped solid by human feet and Anna could see few signs of people or animals.

"Are you sure this is a hunting trail?" She asked.

"Last I checked, it was. The priests that live in the House of Salvation and the few people that live on Hakonesia Peak hunt for game here."

"I thought that the priests weren't supposed to eat meat."

"Hard times call for food no matter what form it takes." Kratos remembered seeing a girl, so poor, that she had taken a roasted squid, fallen from the cart, with flies hovering and ants crawling on it, and had eaten it. He doubted that things had changed very much since then.

-/-/-/-

"You look like hell decided to pay you a personal visit." Yuan said, studying his second-in-command.

He wasn't exaggerating. Botta's skin was darker than it had been—a result of so much time spent in Palmacosta's powerful sun—but there were new lines on his face and a new weariness in his eyes.

"You didn't get the message about the Desians deciding to suddenly inspect the town?"

"I did. That doesn't account for this." Yuan gestured vaguely at Botta's general person. "What happened down there?

"I was living on the streets. Not the easiest thing to do while remaining hidden from Desian eyes."

"No, it isn't." Yuan agreed. " But I thought you were going to stay with your family while you were in Palmacosta. Doesn't your mother live there still with the two youngest ones?"

"Aye, she does." Yuan settled more comfortably in his chair, expression expectant. "I didn't stay with them for security reasons. I couldn't risk Cruxis finding out about them."

Yuan nodded. "Right. And what's the other reason?"

Botta didn't know why he'd even tried hiding it. Yuan was too intuitive and knew him much too well for things like that to work. "How much do you know about the fishing community?"

"As a people? Very little. I grew up well away from the ocean." Even the merest brush of his memories, which are dust-laden and yellowed, he can still bring to mind the smell of pomegranates and ash.

Botta nodded and sat in one of the chairs opposite Yuan's desk, steeling himself. He'd never told anyone this before. "It happened when I was…seventeen? Roundabouts there. I, uh, I went on a fishing trip with the old man that lived next door and my oldest sister and brother." Botta's eyes darkened with memory. "There was this…storm that day. A terrible one. No one saw it coming. They happen like that, sometimes, storms."

_(Water rushing over his head, into his lungs…He can't breathe, doesn't know which way is up…Easier to just not try…)_ Yuan nodded in understanding, gesturing for Botta to continue.

A heaviness seemed to settle itself on Botta's shoulders, making him hunch beneath its powerful weight. "I was the only one to survive." Botta seemed about to stop but he help himself together. "Among fishermen, the worst kind of luck is a lone survivor. We have—it's not a council, really, just a group of our elders—they're the ones that decide what happens. Sometimes, there's a ritual that cleanses the bad luck from a person and they're sent to live with a new family."

"That's not what happened to you, was it?" Yuan said quietly."

"No." Botta said, smiling weakly. "Fishermen are such a superstitious lot. They….They cast me out, so as not to bring more bad luck to our people.

"I went to Izlood to try to make a new life there, but…fishermen are a close people, regardless of race. I had an uncle—who wasn't actually related to us—but,"

"He was still family, right?" The tilt of Yuan's lips wasn't quite a smile, but Botta couldn't think of what else to call it. "You don't need to explain such things to me."

Botta was suddenly reminded of Yuan-and-Kratos. Of course Yuan understood.

"The fishermen in Izlood wouldn't take me either. Word had spread from Palmacosta. It's why you found me in Luin. I was trying to find work there."

"Fishing was all you knew, wasn't it?"

"Aye."

"Botta, you are aware that you can leave the Renegades at any time, right? Because there are fishermen in Tethe'alla, in Sybak and Altamira. If you want, you can go and work there."

Something in Botta's eyes changed ever so subtly. There was gratitude and relief, but also a hint of something else. This, Botta thought, this was why Yuan was worth following. He didn't ask anything he wasn't willing to do himself; didn't trap people. And, despite whatever facades he might put up, Yuan cared about people.

Botta shook his head. "No, sir. I like it here just fine."

"I'm glad to hear that."

"Sir?"

"I have recently been ordered by Yggdrasill to hunt down Kratos and Anna. I don't intend to turn them in, but I need to give the appearance that I'm trying, therefore, I have to keep spending more time in both Derris-Kharlan and out in the field with the Desians."

"I see."

"I wasn't finished. Because of that, you're going to lead the Renegades in my absence." The last part wasn't a question.

Botta stared a little. He had been second-in-command since Makar and his people had betrayed them, that much had always been clear, but the seraphim had filled in for each other effortlessly when one or the other was missing. He'd been in charge of the Renegades in Palmacosta in the months since they'd scattered, but never of the entire organization at once.

"Yessir."

Yuan tilted his head a little, studying Botta. "…You'd make a good soldier, Botta."

"Is that supposed to be a compliment?"

Yuan chuckled. Botta had a way of constantly surprising him. "No. But it's not such a bad thing either."

-/-/-/-

"There aren't any Desians in Tethe'alla." Anna said one night, poking at the fire that chased away the night's shadows.

Kratos blinked at her. "No…"

"We should hide there then. We wouldn't be constantly chased."

"Cruxis keeps the Church of Martel in Tethe'alla very strict. Yggdrasill likely fabricated something about how you're a traitor to the Crown and the Church so that the guards will be on the lookout for you."

Anna made a noise of acknowledgement, her eyes on their sleeping son whose hands were curled in Noishe's fur. "There must be someplace in Tethe'alla where we would be safe. Not everyone can agree with the monarchy and the Church."

"There's one, but it's difficult to get to, even for me." He saw the question in her eyes. "The winds there are…strong enough to knock down most trees and monsters live there naturally. But if you can manage to get to the top, there are few safer places."

"Dangerous enough to avoid attempting it?" Anna asked.

Kratos didn't answer for long moments, weighing the risks and trying very hard to put aside his instinctive protectiveness. "…Probably not."

"And it's not possible to get there on foot?"

"Not entirely. It takes a mixture of magic and luck to get there. And being in the correct season."

"Does it get blocked with snow and ice during winter?"

Kratos shook his head. "No. The winds are actually strong enough to blow away almost all precipitation. The things that create the winds—or, most of them, rather—are plants. Huge flowers taller than the both of us. There are fruits that grow there that are either extremely poisonous to them or are the antidote and the fruits blossom around the end of summer."

"Tethe'alla has the strangest places."

"That I can agree with."

Anna looked at him. "We have to go back to the base if we want to go to Tethe'alla."

Kratos looked at the sky as though searching for something. "We're not far from Hima right now. It shouldn't take more than a week or two to reach Triet."

"How do you do that?" Anna asked, following his eyes. "Look at the stars and know where we are."

Kratos pointed to a bright shining star. "That is called _Miat_ by the elves. It is their guiding star because it is always in the same place every night. And that one there is the beginning of the constellation that I grew up knowing as Eben, the Great Warrior. If you ask Yuan, he'll tell you that that's not its name or the same story, but whatever you call it, that constellation is northeast."

Kratos was about to continue, but Lloyd was stirring. Reddish-brown eyes—Kratos' eyes, which he still wasn't accustomed to seeing in another face—blinked blearily at them. "Why you up? 'S be'time."

"I was showing your mom the stars, Lloyd."

Lloyd thought about it and seemed to come to a conclusion. "I wanna see star!"

He stood and did the strange waddle-walk that toddlers did. Anna had noted that Lloyd developed rather quickly—both in her stomach and out—and Kratos had to agree. The only conclusion that he could come up with was the traces of angelic blood that ran through his veins.

He plopped himself in his father's lap. "Show star, Dad!"

Kratos gave Anna a look when he saw the smothered grin on her face. She just leaned back on her arms. "You have no one to blame but yourself."

Kratos shook his head and relocated his place in the stars. He pointed again. "The constellation that is always in the north—"

"Wha's consation?" Lloyd asked, leaning his head back on his father's chest and looking up.

"A constellation is a group of stars that can make a picture." Lloyd's eyes widened in fascination. "Those stars make a wolf. The story goes that the Summon Spirit Celsius fell in love with a human, but the gods didn't like that, so they cursed the human to transform into a wolf. But the human never stopped loving her and is still by her side. "

Anna tilted her head, trying to see the picture. "Interesting. Is it true?"

"How would I know?"

"Besides the fact that you're a wealth of useless information, you've met Celsius. Didn't you ask her?"

"She's not the easiest person to have a conversation with. Quite honestly, it would probably be easier trying to talk to a rock."

"Is the wolf with her?"

Kratos nodded. "And he's larger than Noishe. And not as whiney."

Noishe raised his head and a slight growl slipped from behind his teeth. Kratos seemed unperturbed. Lloyd tugged on Kratos' shirt and pointed. "Wha' tha' one, Dad?"

"Which one?"

Lloyd pointed more insistently. "_Tha'_ one."

As Kratos murmured stories so old that Anna could almost taste the dust, could see the memory as he spoke in his eyes, she thought that, perhaps, this sort of life was not so bad. Had it not been for the constant, niggling fear of the Desians in the back of her mind, she would have been content with this; travelling and seeing and being able to see the wide expanse of sky. Not a bad life at all.

-/-/-/-

The marching of boots were ever in the distance, so it seemed. But this time was worse because this time, they were separated. Anna was with Lloyd around the nearby countryside while Kratos picked up supplies at the House of Salvation. Sometimes, Kratos swore he could smell the scorching sands of Triet even from here, they were so close.

Noishe was the one who smelled them first thanks to a gust of downwind. The protozoan had raised his head, ears flat and looking ready to pounce. Kratos heard them before he saw them—the clinking of armor and the measure thuds of boots. Instinctively, he set the supplies in his arms down to leave his hands free for fighting, though that wasn't on his mind at the moment. What was on his mind was Anna and Lloyd. If the Desians found them…

"Be sure to check upstairs as well." A familiar voice called. "I won't have them escaping because of your laziness."

Kratos and Noishe dodged out the back door with words to the preacher to not say anything of their presence. Kratos listened hard for Anna and found that he could hear her talking to Lloyd at the edge of the tree line.

"Sir, do you need-?"

"Help? No, I think I'm quite competent enough to check flatlands for some fugitives, Glorick."

Kratos could hear Anna's breathing behind the trees, could see the way that Noishe was still ready for an attack even as they ran for the trees. The Desians weren't yet able to see around the House and hopefully none were looking out the windows.

Anna glanced up at him as he joined them, Lloyd in her arms, his face pressed against her shoulder. "Close call this time."

Kratos didn't pretend to not see the knife she had in one hand. "We'll be fine." Anna frowned at him, brow furrowed, but before Kratos could explain, there was a familiar person leaning against their tree. Noishe immediately relaxed.

"You're getting sloppy, Kratos. This was a close call." Physically, Yuan looked the same, as Anna had known he would. But there was something emotionally pale about him.

"That's what I was telling him. Why are you here?"

"Yggdrasill decided to put me in charge of the search for you. Congratulations, Anna. I think you're the first person to have a world-wide manhunt after you."

"I feel so honored."

Yuan moved further into the shade allowed by the canopy. "I'm sure." He tilted his head curiously at the suddenly shy toddler peering up at him. "He got big really fast."

Anna shifted Lloyd in her arms. "Tell me about it."

"Won't the Desians become suspicious of you?" Kratos asked him.

"No." Yuan waved a hand airily. "They don't know I'm anyone important. I think their current theory is that I'm a high-ranking person from another ranch."

Lloyd mumbled something and Anna looked down at him. "What?"

"His hair funny."

Kratos snorted and Anna had to bite her lip to stop from bursting out laughing as Yuan scowled. "The times may change, but the opinion doesn't."

"Oh, shut up, Kratos." Both seraphim's eyes flicked back towards the House of Salvation, hearing something that Anna couldn't. "What's your plan of action? Keep running until what? Yggdrasill isn't likely to give up on finding you."

"We need to get back to the base."

Yuan shook his head. "You're disappointing the betting pool that was going on, giving up so easily."

"And when did you bet that we would be back?" Kratos asked, knowing his friend far too well.

"I? I would never bet on the two of you like that."

"Who's splitting their cut with you?"

"No one. I take my ten percent right off the top."

"Mm. And we're not giving up."

Kratos saw the thoughts flicker like lightning through the clouds in the blue eyes. "…You're going to Tethe'alla."

"Yes."

More lightning. "The Storyteller? Or Exire?"

"I thought Exire first. I don't want to trouble the Storyteller like that."

"Of course not." Yuan's eyes flicked back to the House. "They're finishing up their search, so I have maybe five minutes, though I swear, these soldiers get sloppier and sloppier every time."

"Which is a good thing for us." Anna pointed out.

"That it is. But you know that the people of Exire won't like a pair of humans living among them."

"That's why the elves are the backup."

Anna arched an eyebrow. "Explain to me how the elves are going to be more welcoming." Yuan stared at her, as did Kratos, the same thoughts rippling across their faces. "What?"

"I thought that you hadn't met any elves." Yuan said.

"I haven't." Something ancient and sad entered Yuan's eyes, even as Kratos avoided her gaze. "What is it?"

Yuan shook his head, a breath of a laugh escaping him. But the laugh crackled with bitterness. "Prejudice does run deep. I have to get going. I'll try to keep the search parties away from the roads to Triet. I'm sure it won't be difficult to convince them that you've been sighted near the Tower."

"You think Yggdrassill will believe that?"

Yuan smirked a little. "Are you questioning my bullshitting abilities?"

Kratos matched the smirk. A general of theirs had been the one to first call it that. "I wouldn't dare."

"I'd be careful in Tethe'alla too." Yuan said as he turned to leave. "From what the others are telling me, the Church is getting antsy over there. Apparently there's been some sort of scandal with the current Chosen, something about him having an affair with a half-elven woman."

"The Church must be loving that." Kratos murmured.

"Just watch your backs."

-/-/-/-

"Who is the Storyteller?" Anna asked later that night. "And…Exire, was it?"

"Exire." Kratos confirmed. "The Storyteller has been a position among the elves for…millennia. They're the ones that keep the traditions and the legends. It was only after…what we did…that the Storytellers moved away from Heimdall."

"Why?"

"Mithos' name is taboo in Heimdall. In any elven village, really. The Storyteller at the time didn't agree, so he moved away so that he could still speak his stories."

"And you think that the Storyteller will let us stay with him?'

"There's a good chance of it. The current Storyteller is a good man."

Anna was accustomed to Kratos' speaking of people long dead the rare times that he did talk about his experiences. That part she didn't find so strange. The strange part for her was that he could talk like that about elves. "You didn't answer the other question. What is Exire?"

Anna saw that the question had been the wrong one immediately by the reflexive clenching of Kratos' right hand, the way that his features shuttered closed. Anna thought Kratos wouldn't answer her, he was silent for so long.

"…It was originally the half-elven king's castle. Or, pieces of it. When we came up with the idea to introduce Martel as a goddess, we knew that no traces of the other religions could exist. The humans had already forgotten ever worshipping the Summon Spirits. They were an abstract concept to us. But the half-elves and the elves were still very strong in their beliefs.

"Our king's castle," Anna wondered if Kratos even realized what he was saying, that he was counting himself among the half-elves. "Was a stronghold of mages. In those days, mages were usually priests as well, serving whichever Summon Spirit in which they specialized. They were the ones that held the cultural knowledge because, usually, they were the only ones who could read. They were the rare ones whose elven or human parents had taught them to read."

"Why didn't most of them teach their children?"

"Well, half of the parents were drafted into the War. And, quite often, they didn't want anything to do with a half-blood child." Anna didn't think that she had ever heard Kratos use the word 'half-breed', the word that she'd heard snarled at the Desians from her fellow prisoners. "Many half-elven communities were usually made up almost entirely of mothers with their children and half of the children didn't have any parents at all."

Anna closed her eyes, trying to imagine a place like that. It wasn't difficult.

"We knew that, if we wanted to get rid of any trace of the old religions that we would have to destroy the half-elven capital, in particular. The three of us went one night to the castle," _(So simple…so easy…heroes…trusted by the King…friends…)_ "Mithos…he went straight to see the King." Kratos leaned his forearms on his thighs, not looking at Anna. "He killed him…him, his wife and their little girl.

"Yuan and I…we went to each of the mage's libraries and…we set them on fire." Kratos could still smell the ash, could still see the knowledge going up in flames before their eyes. He remembered Martel's death, remembered being furious with the world for that moment and wanting to just watch it _burn_. "People noticed, naturally. The King's death wasn't discovered until later, but they saw the flames and ran to try and put them out."

Kratos swallowed before continuing. "We locked them in that castle. Put up a barrier and left them to die." _(Their screams still echo in his ears, in his mind…the beautiful castle washed grey and black with soot and ash…)_ "Mithos needed a stronghold, he said. He said that we would need a place to keep Martel's body safe until we could resurrect her. We took the castle up to Derris-Kharlan using the Eternal Sword and magic. We couldn't take all of it—mostly the outer areas like a few towers and the gardens—but most it made it.

"It took a few years for Mithos to see any kind of reason again." Kratos was understating it immensely. It took decades, but to them, that was all it felt like was years. "He saw the half-elves being oppressed even more, saw that the communities that had been beginning to build themselves back up after the War were falling back into decay. He wanted a safe haven for half-elves, but there's no place to put all those people.

"So he took the ones from a very old village—near the borders of the elvenlands, but still on human territory—and he relocated all of them to the ruins of the castle. Maxwell helped him make the castle ruins float and guarded the community that was developing there. He still guards it. Somewhere along the way, it became named Exire."

Anna was silent, no reaction visible at all. Kratos glanced at her. "…Well?" He waited for her to explode at him, rage, hate, something that fit the gravity of what they had done.

But he had forgotten her aptitude for being able to surprise him. "…I'm processing."

Kratos waited, the world suddenly seeming too loud, too open, too quiet, too alive. He felt old, remembering these things. He could feel the age even if he didn't feel it physically.

When Anna finally looked up at him, eyes serious, she said, "We're going to the Storyteller."

"What?"

"If we have to run to Tethe'alla to escape all this, we're going to the Storyteller." Whether Kratos knew it or not, Anna could tell that the memories were still hurting somewhere, were like a bad bruise that wouldn't go away, hurting only when you touched it.

"Anna, Exire is better for Lloyd." Kratos knew that there were children in that floating city, children that Lloyd needed to interact with._ (He still remembers—or rather, can't remember—times before Yuan, before he'd ever played or laughed with another person. He doesn't want that for his son)_.

"And the Storyteller is better for you." There was a spark of temper to her words, but her tone was the kind that didn't have room for arguments.

"I'll be fine."

"You're not gonna win me on this one, Kratos. This is all temporary, remember?"

Kratos saw it in her expression, in the stubborn lines of her shoulders. No, he wouldn't be able to convince her otherwise this time. But he was relieved that he wouldn't have to be in Exire—a place he had never visited after the first time, not once in four thousand years—where he could see ghosts and hear them whisper in his ear. _(…You killed me…alright?...laughing with an arm around his shoulder…join us!...mom…bet you I can!...ther…rother…my brother…)_


	41. Chapter 41

**Disclaimer:** Don't own anything!

**Author's Note:** Is it strange that, when someone asks me what I want to do for a job or for college, that I reply "I don't know." but when I'm doing research for colleges, all I look for is their art programs?

-/-/-/-

_When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.  
~Henri Nouwen_

-/-/-/-

She was a very different sort—or so she seemed to the Storyteller. She was nothing like elven women—or indeed, most human women—who were trained to be polite and quiet and submissive. She was fiery and opinionated and had a tongue sharp enough to rival most blades.

He rather liked this Anna.

Lloyd, their son, was curious and intuitive and seemed to never sit still. And his features were reminiscent of his father's, from the color of his eyes to the unruly hair. And the protozoan never left the boy's side, always with teeth ready to nip in reprimand or to yank Lloyd back by the collar, which happened fair often.

"I would not have imagined you for a family man." The Storyteller told Kratos one night, both standing on one of the high cliffs that surrounded his hut. The powerful winds whipped at their hair and, from here, nearly the entire canyon was visible.

"What did you imagine me as?" Kratos asked. This placed stirred at memories of a child's voice talking about a village in the mountains, about climbing high trees, of riding out a storm, of pomegranates and flocks of sheep.

"I'm not quite sure." The Storyteller confessed. "I did not think I knew you well enough to make such assumptions."

"And yet you still took us in."

"Clearly, you needed to hide from something rather large if you came here. I couldn't turn you away."

"You have my thanks, and Anna's as well, for doing this."

The Storyteller waved a veined hand. "No thanks are necessary."

"I think they are."

The Storyteller studied him, noticing that the stubbornness in his eyes was mirrored in the nearly unnoticeable lines that traced his face. He had still been young when Martel died and Mithos fell into madness, even by human terms.

"Perhaps they are." The elf agreed. "…Did you have a family…before?"

Kratos slanted a look at him sideways. "Not like this."

"It is a miraculous thing."

"You had a family once, did you not?"

"Yes. Yes, I did. More years back then I care to remember." The Storyteller found it odd to speak with Kratos because, for all the age that the elf felt, he knew that Kratos felt more years still. Millennia, even. And yet, Kratos still looked younger, still acted younger, occasionally. "She gave me two children and a warm home."

"What changed?"

"My duties. I was only the apprentice to the present Storyteller at the time." He knew that Kratos had been alive then—of course he had—but he has no idea whether the seraphim remembers the pale shadow of a boy standing beside the previous Storyteller. "And she wanted to stay in the village, to let the our boys grow up around other children. I agreed with her, but…my place was here."

"Is she still alive?"

"No. She died several years back. My oldest son came to tell me."

Kratos didn't apologize, like most humans, and indeed, many elves, would have done. He knew what little use such platitudes were to those who had lost something. Instead, he bowed his head a little—in truth, it's little more than a nod—and bid him goodnight before returning inside.

-/-/-/-

Anna helped him with his vegetable garden, though she was the first to admit that she didn't know the first thing about gardening. The Storyteller simply smiled and said, "I shall teach you."

She was a quick study and he wondered what she would have been had the Desians not taken her. He knew the Desians only through tales and he was sure that he could not imagine their terror by dint of simply being Tethe'allan, but he knew that they had taken something from Anna that could never be returned.

"What is this?" Anna asked, looking curiously at one of the fruits that dangle from the branches of the trees. The fruit was lightly striped, much like a conch, in colors of grapes and blueberries and was shaped like a large pear.

"It is called _korih_. It is an elven fruit. Try it, if you wish to."

Anna bit into the fruit, teeth sinking into the soft skin. "It's sour!"

The Storyteller frowned and took a look at the fruit. "Ah yes. I miscalculated. These fruits are terribly picky. It is not yet ripe."

"Are they typically sweet?" Anna asked.

"Yes, very. Often, we use their nectar in place of sugar."

"Huh. Fascinating."

"You like the sourness?" The Storyteller asked, slightly perplexed.

Anna smiled, thinking of Triet. "We lived near this town for a long time. It was always hot there and their fruits were the sourest things I've ever tasted. And they use the nectars of the fruit a lot too; they use it in their stews in their rice and even in some of their bread."

"That sounds both strange and interesting."

Anna laughed. "That's what we thought too, but it's easy to get used to."

He taught her about the herbs that grew in the mountains and she spoke to him about what little she could remember of her childhood. She spoke of a sparkling lake and racing through the streets.

She asked him about elven culture, of their beliefs and how they lived and what they ate. There was no judgment in her. Or, if there was, he couldn't tell. Perhaps that was one of the things that Kratos liked about her.

-/-/-/-

"Daddy, tell story?" Lloyd asked as soon as his father stepped through the door. He was hardly tall enough to come up to Kratos' knee.

Kratos knelt beside his son. "What kind of story?"

"Star!" Lloyd exclaimed, eyes lighting up.

Kratos chuckled a little. "I should've guessed." He hoisted Lloyd up easily, sitting him so that one of Lloyd's legs was on each side of his neck. Anna followed them outside like it was a regular occurrence, though she sat on the window sill rather than stand by Kratos and Lloyd.

"Pick a star." Kratos told him.

Lloyd scanned the skies and pointed. "Tha' one!"

Kratos followed his finger and felt a twinge of hurt when he recognized the constellation that the star belonged to, and who had first told the story to him. "That constellation belongs to Undine. She is the Summon Spirit of Water and she protected sailors, their families and the sea elves, who are her people."

The Storyteller frowned as he listened. He had never heard anything of sea elves save for the legends told by older children to frighten younger siblings. The sea elves were supposed to be terrible creatures with pointed teeth and lovely faces who dragged sailors to their deaths.

"One day, there was a very bad storm and a ship sunk. There were three girls on that ship—sisters, who were so close, people said, that they could have been triplets. The girls were drowning, but their only wish was that they didn't want to be apart. Undine granted their wish and turned them into sea elves, so they would be able to breathe underwater.

"The sisters were so thankful that they asked to be able to serve Undine forever. And they still do, living in the waters near her Temple, which they guard against anyone who would hurt their mistress."

Lloyd was lightly snoozing by now, head resting on his father's hair. Anna rose from her seat to stand by them. "If that's true, they didn't attack us in all the time that we were at the Temple." She said quietly. Her voice was nearly stolen by the constant winds of this gorge and the Storyteller could hardly hear her, but Kratos seemed to have no such difficulties.

"We didn't mean Undine harm."

Anna hummed in understanding before reaching up to carefully lower Lloyd down. "Where'd you go today? You were gone when I woke up."

"Call it a surprise." Kratos told her, kissing her lightly.

No, the Storyteller thought, Kratos hadn't struck him as a family man, but he didn't seem to be doing such a bad job.

-/-/-/-

"No sign of them?"

"Very few. And they're difficult to track." Yuan told Yggdrasill. "I wouldn't be able to do it myself if I didn't know Kratos so well."

"They have to stop in the towns for supplies at some point."

Yuan shook his head. "Not necessarily. Kratos is with her. He knows enough tricks to keep them living off the land for months, at least."

Yggdrasill's eyes—piercing blue as they had been when Yuan had first met the too-skinny little blonde boy—narrowed at him. "And you have no idea where they could be?"

"I have theories, but they get crazier and crazier with each new one. Too many places are off the grid these days. They could be hiding anywhere."

Yggdrasill leaned forward, hands folded in a steeple. "Let's think about this logically then. If they plan to hide out in one place for any amount of time, it would have to have necessities. Particularly since they have the child with them."

Yuan mimicked him, looking at the maps spread out between them on the desk. "So, fresh water, relative safety from monsters, multiple ways to get out in cases of emergency, an easy food source."

"A river, perhaps?" A pale pianist finger pointed out several locations. "Have you searched in these places?"

Yuan studied the map. "Well, that particular river is under Forcystus' jurisdiction as it's in the Iselia Forest. And the other runs near Hakonesia Peak, which goes directly out into the sea. We checked that area, but I'll look again. As for the third, that is near the Ossa Trail."

"And what does that mean to you?"

"It means that Kratos would have two options there. Either raise his child underground, in the old dwarven mines, or risk A012 and his son getting pneumonia. It's autumn in Sylvarant, but the mountains are already freezing over."

Yggdrasill made a noise in his throat. "I may be wrong, but is that not crossing over into Kvar's territory?"

"It's stretching it a little, but yes, I suppose so."

"I think Kvar should take over the hunt in that particular area."

Even though Yuan knew that Kratos, Anna and Lloyd were well away from any danger in that area, indeed, in all of Sylvarant, he protested because this was _Kvar_ that Yggdrasill was talking about. The monster that had done…those things to Anna and the other prisoners.

"To be quite honest, I don't think Kvar is capable of the job."

"No? And you've been doing so much better? If I didn't know any better, Yuan, I would say that you were misleading everyone in order to protect Kratos." Yggdrasill was no idiot. He knew how close Kratos-and-Yuan were, had seen it for himself. The idea that Yuan could betray Cruxis, that he would betray them, for Kratos, was not alien at all.

Yuan forced himself to remain perfectly calm. This was a dangerous game to be playing. "I'm not an idiot. There's no reason to protect Kratos at this juncture. All it would do is get me killed along with him and I'm quite fond of living, thank you very much."

It was a lie, but a well-crafted one and the words were ash in Yuan's mouth.

-/-/-/-

A mug was pushed into his hands and Yuan glanced up, somehow unsurprised to see Botta and half-expecting Kratos.

"You look like you need it." Botta said to the unasked question.

Yuan didn't question what the drink was. He simply gulped it down and inhaled sharply at the bitter alcohol that burned at his throat. He glared balefully at his second-in-command. "What, are we out of coffee?"

"Temporarily. I thought the alcohol would help a little more." Botta settled himself in one of the chairs across from Yuan's desk. "So, what's happened?"

"Kvar's on the search for them."

"I don't understand the problem. They're in Tethe'alla. Kvar can't touch them there."

"How long do you think that Kvar won't notice that there are no actual signs of them having been anywhere in Sylvarant? How long do you think it'll take him to start on the theory that they somehow went to Tethe'alla? Do you think that he won't hunt them down there?"

"…You said that they were with the Storyteller, who's an elf."

"Yes."

"Most half-elves wouldn't ever go anywhere near the elves. Here, in Sylvarant, we've been close to humans because we don't have much of a choice. There's no way we could get the money or the resources to build our own town or village. It's not an easy fact to face, but it's true."

Yuan looked at him over the rim of the mug. "Are you telling me this because you think I don't know what half-elves are like?" He asked quietly.

Botta winced inwardly. He'd forgotten again. He'd forgotten about the things that made up the man in front of him, forgot that he had seen, experienced, the War. "No. I'm telling you this because I think you've been away from half-elves outside of Cruxis or the Renegades for too long. We're all exceptions to the rules."

"I know that much better than you do."

"So why are you so concerned with Kvar? Even if he goes to Tethe'alla, it's likely he won't go anywhere near the elven lands."

Yuan raked a hand through his hair, massaging his temples. "See, I think the opposite. I think that Kvar is the kind of person that, since what he sees as his 'property' was stolen from him—and the way that Kratos did it probably doesn't help either—that he'll do whatever it takes to recover it. Including invading the elves, which may or may not start a small war."

This, Botta realized, was the crux of the problem. None of them had seen war. Not real war. Not anything even close to the scale that he knew Kratos, Yuan and Yggdrasill had lived and fought through.

"You don't want it to."

"Of course not. What sane man wants war? And if a war does start, Yggdrasill is likely to simply wipe out the elves."

"He would do that?" Somehow, the way that Yuan said it, so bluntly and casually, made it difficult for Botta to believe it, though he knew that Yggdrasill was, and had been, doing much the same to humans for centuries, if not millennia.

"What, commit genocide?" Yuan said with a twisted smile that was very nearly a grimace. "It wouldn't be the first time."

"So what do you plan to do about all this?"

"To be perfectly honest? I don't know. My position right now is very delicate. Yggdrasill doesn't trust me. And if he interrogates me, I can't say with any certainty that I wouldn't give the Renegades away."

Botta rested his forehead on his hands. Yuan was honest. That was one of the reasons he'd chosen to continue following him. This kind of honesty, however, was brutal and harsh. For whatever reason, the notion that Yuan could break to that extent had never quite occurred to Botta.

"Sir," Botta began, not quite sure where he was going with this. "Do you think that's likely to happen?"

"It doesn't matter whether it's likely or not. 'S the problem with dealing with madmen. If it's on the table, then it's in the realm of possibility that Yggdrasill will do it."

"How would we know? If you gave us up?"

Yuan looked across the desk at him. This was another reason why Botta had struck him as a good second-in-command. Besides being loyal and smart, he was practical. He wouldn't ask about the why's or look around helplessly. No, he was going straight for what would happen if the possibility ever came true.

"Most likely? You wouldn't get a warning. You'd see angels coming down on the base and light coming from the sky."

"…We can give them decoys."

Yuan stilled. If this was going where he thought it was going… "Elaborate."

"I and a few others can pretend to be caught. We'll pretend to give up locations or rumors. If you catch us, it should placate Yggdrasill, if only for a while longer."

"No. Absolutely not."

Something about the seraphim's automatic refusal chafes Botta's temper. "Yuan, you don't have many options right now."

"There are better options than that. I'm not putting you all up for torture or as bait. There are other ways of getting around this."

Yuan's eyes were fiery and stubborn and Botta thought that this was what Yuan must have been like four thousand years ago, when he, Kratos, Martel and Mithos had spoken of ending a war that had been going on for generations.

"Then you had best think of them before we're boxed into a corner." Botta told him before standing and leaving his office.

Yuan stayed in his chair, so unmoving that one might think he was a statue, until long after the sun had set in the windows and the night sky settled itself over the world.

-/-/-/-

"You're a hard man to find."

Kratos looked up, surprised to see Yuan. Or anyone at all, really. "How did you find me?"

Yuan gave him a look as he pushed himself off the tree he had been leaning against. "Really? You have to ask? I know you better than anyone."

"Fair enough."

Yuan surveyed the small clearing. In truth, Yggdrasil had not been far off in his thoughts. He could hear a small stream nearby and, in the middle of this forest, there would be no shortage of food. Life was everywhere.

"So what's all this?" Yuan asked, gesturing at the ax and the logs already cut. "Thinking of taking up woodcutting?"

"I thought you knew me better than anyone." Kratos threw his words back at him with a slight smirk.

Yuan blinked at him and wondered how he couldn't have seen it sooner. "You are disgustingly domesticated, d'you know that?" Kratos arched an eyebrow at him and Yuan knew he didn't really have room to argue. After all, hadn't this situation been somewhat reversed once upon a memory? "One of the dangers of being married, I suppose."

"What's happened?" Kratos asked quietly. Yuan wouldn't be here, now, unless something had gone wrong.

"Kvar's been sent out to hunt you and Anna. Anna specifically."

Kratos cursed under his breath and Yuan was grateful that he didn't have to go through the same conversation he'd had with Botta about why, exactly, this was bad. "You didn't try to stop it?"

"Yggdrasill doesn't trust me as much anymore. Yes, I know. Shocking."

"Not really the time for sarcasm, Yuan."

"…I'm afraid he'll torture me." The half-elf admitted, not looking at Kratos. Rather, his eyes were looking out at the forest, but Kratos knew that that wasn't what he was seeing. He was seeing the possibilities, seeing Martel's face swim before him.

Kratos knew that it wasn't the idea of torture that had Yuan nervous. Torture was nothing they hadn't experienced before. It was the idea of the kind of torture that Mithos could do to them.

_(…I saw you dead…)_

"I don't want to give them up, even if I don't mean to. They're-"

Yuan didn't need to finish the sentence. Kratos understood the sentiment. The Renegades were family now too. It was strange, to have so many people in that category. It was just the two of them for so long.

"What do you need?"

"I'm not asking you to give yourself up for this, Kratos." Yuan said, affronted.

"I know. And besides, even if I was offering, you'd never accept."

"I need a plan. I need something to keep Kvar focused on something else."

"You have your Renegades."

Yuan glared darkly at him. "You think Botta hasn't suggested it?"

"I wasn't talking about bait." Kratos said calmly. "You're panicking."

"No, I'm not." Yuan snapped. And perhaps Kratos was right, just a little, because Yuan didn't want to see what he knew Mithos was cruel enough to show him, didn't want to see Martel's smiling face and hear her voice_ (But, oh, wouldn't it be lovely to see her again…you loved her…love her still, even after all this time…)_ and he knew that, if Martel asked it of him, even if she was little more than a hallucination or a solid memory in front of him again, made almost alive by Mithos' magic_ (But not quite because Martel was dead, dead and gone and she can't come back)_ that he would do anything for her.

And that included betraying the Renegades.

"Yes, you are. You're not thinking straight and you need to get your act together or else all the things you've worked for these past three years are going to go on a very fast trip to Hell."

Yuan didn't look at Kratos, focusing instead on rooting himself back in the here and now. Possibilities did nothing but twist your mind around until you didn't know which was up.

"…Supplies were going to be sent to Palmacosta." Yuan said and in his mind, he could see the supply routes, could see the wagons that the Desians would be using. "The Desians were there and some of the people rebelled. We can hijack the supplies, redistribute them to the people rather than the Desians."

"I see one problem with that though." Yuan glanced at him questioningly. "Palmacosta is Magnius' territory."

"But the supplies are coming from Kvar's ranch because his continent is the richest in terms of living supplies. He's got two well-travelled towns and Hima, which always has the essentials for travellers. And Kvar doesn't like people taking what he sees as his."

"If that's your plan, why are you still here?"

"…He won't kill me. If he does decide to torture me, he won't kill me."

And it was because of a promise made to a dying sister four thousand years ago.

"And neither will I." Kratos told him. They had been over it, time and time again. They had done the song and dance of suicide and _please kill me_ when the weight of the years became too unbearable. But something in them was not yet ready to die. Their hands always trembled with the knife and they'd back away in dim horror. "Those Renegades need you."

"You don't have to tell me that. I don't intend to die. But…Mithos is unpredictable. If, somehow, he manages to break me…"

Kratos nodded. Yes, only then would he kill him. Because surely, death was better than living for eternity lost in your own mind.

-/-/-/-

"Kvar is looking for us." Kratos told Anna quietly. They're sitting outside, legs hanging over the side of the cliff and Lloyd curled up with Noishe. It was…not quite quiet here, for the winds were always howling and the waterfall constantly roaring, but it was a strange kind of serenity.

"…He won't stop." Anna said, turning her left hand over so that she could see the Exsphere on the back. "He wants this too badly."

"Yuan thinks that he can keep Kvar distracted for a while longer."

"Do you believe him?"

"His plan will work. They always do. The problem is that there are only so many plans that can work." Kratos hesitated slightly. "He was right. We cannot run forever. Eventually, we'll run out of hiding spots."

"Do you have a plan? Or is it going to be a 'make it up as we go along' sort of thing?"

"There is a plan."

Anna looked sideways at him, leaning back on her hands. To Kratos, it was difficult to believe that Anna had ever been anything but what she was now; free and strong and confident. "Does this plan of yours have anything to do with where you've been disappearing off to during the day?"

"It might."

Anna grinned at him. "At least I don't have to worry about you going off with some other woman."

That made Kratos laugh. "Such an optimist."

"Well, someone has to get you out of your morbid moods."

"Are you suggesting that I'm moody?"

Anna's smile was wide and wicked as she stood. "I would never _dare_ to do such a thing."

"No, of course not." Kratos grumbled as he followed her lead. "Because you haven't done crazier things."

"You're looking at it the wrong way." She said, linking her arm with his. "At least it was exciting."

"Not at the moment."

"Well, of course not. Nothing's exciting when it's happening. If it's terrifying in the moment, then it'll be something to look back with hindsight and say, 'I probably should've thought that out better.'"

"Do you ever think that we have too many of those moments?"

"Not at all. They tend to make life interesting, in the good way or otherwise."

How strange was it, Kratos thought, that not four years ago, life had been monotonous and grey. He had been there when everything was happening, would be here when it all ended and, quite possibly, he and the other seraphim would stand from the ashes and do it all over when it all began again. Before, that had been a tortuous thought.

No longer.


End file.
